- Bahiya. - Huh?
Do you know what is yellow journalism?
People write articles by simply ignoring the facts and stretching the truth.
Mainstream media? Yes?
Yes. That's what I am reading.
But why are you stressing yourself about studies?
Bahiya, I don't have a passion anymore.
Studying is all I have right now.
And anyway, our house has also become pretty boring these days.
It's quite sad actually,
With Avi and Lakshay not talking to each other.
- Should we do something for them? - Get them drunk.
Please. No.
Avi will send drunk texts to Mahima after he's wasted.
And then Lakshay will get offended.
- FIFA night. - What FIFA night?
Two people in front of a TV playing with controllers? They'll just fight again.
How about beer pong?
You said 'NO' to alcohol just a minute ago!
- Beer is not alcohol, bro. - I see.
Can we do something that will get them back together?
Something both of them would like.
- No. - No.
Then what can we do?
Veere!
Sameer Bro! Somebody please open the door.
Hey cute-oo! You open it, cute-oo!
Is that Vicky Paaji?
It's over! Motherfucker!
What happened, bro. Tell us.
Bro...
Don't say a word to me!
I expected better from you.
Those dudes... Those dudes will burn me alive.
Those dudes will kidnap me.
Avi! Tell him, fucker.
Hold on, bro. Sit down. Sit. Sit down.
I have sent them to look outside.
Hey, guys. Take a look and see if there's anyone outside.
Calm down, paaji. What is this?
Hold on. Hold on.
Who will set the fire? Set fire to what?
Oh! I don't Know! Talk to him, bro. Talk to him!
Hey! Nobody is outside.
- Nobody is there, right bro? - No.
- Anyone there, Gandhi? - Nobody is there, bahiya.
Nobody is there. Nobody is there.
- Come on. - Paaji.
- Let's go out. - I don't want to go.
- Let's go out, paaji. - I don't want to go.
- I am requesting you. - I don't want to go!
Let's go outside and talk calmly! Come!
Let's go, Paaji. Everything is good.
Nobody is here! Anybody is here? No!
What was that?
I think even he has been through a breakup.
Doesn't seem like a breakup. Seems like an overdose.
Come on, take this and go.
Yes, bro.
Tell me.
What happened?
They're chasing me.
Who is?
- Listen. - Yes.
- Do you have any alcohol? - This is not the time, bro.
Tell me what happened so that I can help you.
Oh bro! I have misplaced some guy's stash.
Which guys?
Piragarhi's gang.
- Rinku? - No, no, no, no.
That Uncle's gang. Those people are searching for me to beat me up.
Well, that is Rinku's gang. Oh fuck!
Fuck!
Are you an idiot?
You got trapped and you came to our house to trap us too?
This is the safest place for me.
- Please listen to me bro. - No. No. No.
We have Sameer. We have a tiny Gandhi with us.
Please bro! Please! Please!
- Please bro! Please! Please! - Okay!
Thank you, bro. Love you, bro.
- Love you, brother. - No. No. No.
- Thank you so much bro. I love you. - Yeah. Yeah.
Hold on. You will sleep in the room tonight. Right?
We will make the rest of the plan tomorrow.
- Only one night? - Yes.
- One night? - Yes.
- One night! - Yes.
One night! One night! One night!
Fuck!
Whoa! What the fuck, Paaji! What are you doing man?
Morning boner needs attention, bro.
You were taking your sweet time inside there,
so I thought I'll take care of myself here.
Damn!
Damn, bro. If the washroom was occupied, you should have waited.
Would you also pee here if needed?
By the way, bro! Do you apply some kind of oil or something? For the 'Size'!
Asking for a friend.
- Nah, bro. This is all-natural junk. - Okay.
- Alright! See you. - See you.
Paaji! Don't lock the door. The lock is defective.
Thank you.
Let's hang out here, fuckers!
If this dumbfuck is not out of the house by morning, I am gonna kill him!
Wakey, wakey, Broski.
Have Vicky's special drink.
Drink it. Drink it. Drink it. Drink it.
Dhriti, we'll be sitting in the front row in ten minutes.
I'm so excited to see Mr. Javed Gulzar perform.
Veere! I am going to Jamnapar. I am taking the bike.
I shall return in the evening and bring momos. It's a date!
Oh Yes! Five bottles. Fifty for delivery.
Okay.
No, paaji. Offer six bottles. Delivery free.
It will be profitable. Add one more.
Cute-oo. I see a future with you.
20 percent partner. Business is booming, motherfuckers!
What's his scene?
Not a scene as such. He is just slightly paranoid. Otherwise he is chill.
Okay. And what is actually the scene?
Actually, the scene is that...
Some people are looking to beat the shit out of him.
So he's trying to lay low.
Great! And you got him home. Why am I not surprised!
What?
I'm saying it's great that you got him home. Good job!
- Are you blaming me for this? - Oh, is this not your fault?
Is he not your friend?
Oh, actually, Nothing is your fault. Right?
Fixing that broken bathroom tap. That's not your fault.
The chair which was supposed to be fixed. That's not your fault.
The room's lock had to be repaired. That's
Are you playing 'Match the following' with me?
We are not playing 'Match the following'.
All the shit that's going on and it's not your fault?
You're taking this to another level.
I did not invite him in.
You're blowing this out of proportion.
Okay. Listen to me now. Don't fight.
Now that all of us are here together, let's just have a beer.
Guys. I've spoken to him.
He will stay here just one more night and then he'll leave.
Just relax.
Morning jerk off?
Best, fuckers!
Alright, babies. Daddy is leaving.
Go fucker!
Bro! Bro! Bro!
- You're leaving? - Of course I am leaving.
I mean, of course I am leaving.
Of course I am leaving.
Do visit again. Once or twice in six to seven months.
Love you.
Take his blessings, son.
- No, no, no. - Vicky, my man! We are so happy.
Don't embarrass us. We are very happy.
You crashed here for a couple of days. It was great fun. Such good times.
We will miss you.
Oh, my cuties!
I am just going out to get some stash.
You'll are acting so sentimental?
If I ever actually leave, you all will be so heartbroken.
You are going to the dealer?
Aren't you going to your village? Jamnapar?
Also, I just wanted to know something.
Why do we do our business on Google meet?
Future-Pandemic-Planning, bro.
They are coming for us.
Boo!
First of all, zoom is much better.
Secondly, when will you go to Jamnapar, Vicky?
Why go, bro? This too is my house.
We have a business going. A-one!
I will go when I have to go.
Okay! Okay!
Well bro, I am taking the bike.
Cute-oo, thanks for this.
Tucking it in here. Stash can be stored under.
It's Used.
Also, it looks like you are always hard.
Paaji, that's the backdoor. Paaji!
That's the front door.
Hold on! Didn't you say some fuckers are looking for him to beat him up?
That's what he told me. I am not lying.
Who exactly is looking for him?
He brings momos every morning and scores drugs in the evening.
How is he doing that? Huh?
Does the search party get called off? They're like "Vicky's buying momos".
"We can't grab him now."
I wonder how come my words have no impact on him.
Effect.
- Affect? - Effect. Effect.
- What about it? - Effect of your words.
I bet you it doesn't impact him either. I am telling you.
Impact?
He was s♪♪t scared when he came here and look at him now.
Now he's scaring us.
Correct.
- So sad. Guys, Listen! We need a plan. - Definitely! We need a plan.
Hold on. Do you all have a problem with Vicky paaji?
- Yes, we have a problem. - I see.
And so should you, if you want to live in this house.
Okay? Banchhod boys.
- Banchhod boys! - Yes.
- It's cleanup time. - Three!
Yes!
Let's make him feel unwanted.
Treat him like he's a ghost to us in the house.
We have to bear a small loss
but a wolf has come into our house
We will endure a little
to chase him away.
- Come on. Get up. - Just a minute.
Did you dirty your bed downstairs?
I turned it into a dustbin.
Good.
When a man befriends his bed
it hurts when he has to part with it.
Let him sleep on the mattress. Banchhod!
Fucker!
When will he go?
He is your friend.
Manchurian Noodles. Pizza.
Momos.
F♪♪k! Eat everything.
You think he will share?
Motherfucker!
Why didn't I think of this?
If we had allowed you to get a bed, wouldn't
that have destroyed Lakshay's party zone?
Isn't the party zone destroyed now?
Come.
Come quickly.
Fuck!
- F♪♪k! F♪♪k! - What's the matter?
Did the two of you get that lock repaired?
That...
We don't let him sleep in a room for one night and he brings a bed.
I'm telling you he's not going to leave, bro.
- One more problem. - Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
Let's solve the Vicky paaji problem first. Right?
Rinku is looking for him, right?
Rinku shall find him now.
Hello, Paaji. How are you doing?
Tell me, my boy. Why have you called?
I have big news for you.
The guy you are looking for is over here.
Who are you talking about?
Vicky. The one who fled with your stash.
Are you high on something? I met Vicky yesterday.
Why would I be looking for him?
But, Paaji, he said that...
Never mind that. Let me get back to work.
I… Rinku... hello.
What did he say?
Rinku says, he isn't looking for him.
Kick him out of the house. This is a fucking joke!
He's made himself comfortable in his new bed.
It won't open from inside.
- Really? Then how does it open? - It opens from outside.
- And from inside? - Inside...!
Use your IQ, Sameer.
You use it all up while writing poetry.
I'm learning. I'm learning from you.
I'm learning how to forget things like you do.
Are you going to just sit here and do nothing?
Call that monster and tell him to open the door!
He isn't answering? You try.
When he isn't answering my call why would he...
What kind of logic is that? The same phone is going to ring.
I'll try. Hold on.
- He isn't answering. - Course!
Bang it, Gandhi!
Are you an idiot?
I was actually talking about banging on the window but this was great.
Sorry, man.
'Sorry man?' You think this is a comedy show?
- Hey. - I'm not the one who broke the lock.
But I'll definitely be the one to break you!
Bro. Easy.
Uh, Lakshay.
Forget it. He's a kid. Let it be.
I'm letting you go because bro says so.
Else it wouldn't take time for Lakshay Kochhar to beat you to pulp.
I am going to take my bro's suggestion.
You two look so cute together.
I called you bro by mistake. Move away.
Buddy, open the door. We are stuck. Vicky...
Delivery time, paaji.
- At what time is Maharani coming? - She isn't coming.
Why? Why isn't she coming?
She mentioned something about a doctor's scene.
Really! Which doctor?
The one from C/16, right?
He is quite a player, I tell you.
But actually I...
I think they'll make a cute couple.
Bro, please. Please.
It could be the one from B/14 too. Even he is a doctor.
- You are right but the one from C/16... - Oh my God!
Your doctor from C/16 is a chiropractor and yours is a dentist.
They aren't even doctors.
And first of all it's a doctor's scene not a scene with a doctor.
How does your mind go to an affair directly?
People need doctors when they're sick, for fuck's sake.
In general that's when a person goes to a doctor.
It could be an affair too.
Open the door, Sameer. Otherwise I'll die here.
I will die, bro.
What drug has Vicky paaji taken before falling asleep?
Vicky paaji, It's Gandhi! Cute-oo calling you!
Open the door, Vicky.
I'll kill him.
Whom? Whom should we ask for help? Who do we call?
Hold on. Let me put a text in the College group.
Anyone who reads it will come.
- Should we break the door? - Yes.
Yeah, Capatain. Break it. Break it. Go and kick it.
Please. It's Gandhi. Please.
Don't you watch superhero movies in Ghana?
Bloody fuckers.
Fuck.
Hey, please get someone to open the door quickly. Please!
- Fucking hell! - What's the matter, Sameer?
Hello, bro. Even I am not interested in being here with him.
But we aren't dying, are we? Just chill.
- I'm going to pee. - Me too.
- What are you doing? - Me too.
What do you mean, me too? You want to do it together?
- Will you jerk it also after I'm done? - Okay.
Vicky, paaji!
NCB is going to raid the place.
Vicky!
Man, What is this?
And you guys?
- Did he open it? Is he awake? - A small lock...
I should not have sat down.
Incidentally, brothers.
Look at the brighter side of life.
The universe wants all of us brothers to spend time together.
We should bond.
The universe wants you to shut the fuck up!
That's what the universe wants. Plus the three of us.
Stay quiet for two minutes.
You've changed.
Earlier you used to cuddle me while sleeping.
Don't you miss the heat of my body?
What heat? Stay off.
You stick to me every night and sleep, right?
You touch me at night, don't you?
Are you going to blame my bromance for your nightfall too?
Sick romance!
Okay bro. Nightfall? You experience it too?
- No, bro. I've got cans. - It happens to Sameer as well.
Oh!
You are the dumbest motherfucker, idiot!
Is this all we've got to talk about?
Motherfu...! Who is pelting pebbles at our house?
- Who is it? - Who is it?
Oh, hi. One second.
Come on in. Keys. Keys. Keys.
- Who is it? - That's not important. Give me the keys.
- Good catch! - Nice catch, Gandhi!
You should have taken such catches during the selections, Gandhi.
Here we go.
Come.
No! No!
- Caught you. - No! No!
Half the people in Delhi are your friends.
Was she the only one among 15 million people you could call?
No man.
Boys! Why did you hit?
F♪♪k.
Mahima.
Hold on, Mahima.
Mahima!
- What's this noise? - Mahima, listen.
One sec.
Foursome gone wrong?
Motherf♪♪♪♪r! I want you and your bed out in 30 minutes!
You may leave the bed if you want.
- Avi, bahiya! - Wait one minute. Bro.
Listen to me.
That's not the exit.
It's this... But one second. One second.
I'm sorry. Okay?
We both are stupid. He's more stupid but...
- we're stupid. - Okay. I have classes. May I go?
F♪♪k! Okay, fine. Momos in the evening at NSU?
Shove the momos up your a♪s!
What are you waiting for? Lift it and take it away.
Guys, deeply sorry for everything.
I am leaving. I'll find some place else to stay.
- Thank you. - Very much.
- But, paaji.. - What? But what?
Please don't stop. Keep moving. Take the things out.
I was saying, now that you are leaving, tell us why you came in the first place.
My...
Listen to me.
Bro.
I don't know whether I told you or not...
but my daddy passed away last month.
What?
When did that happen, paaji?
Why didn't you tell us?
Who would I tell, bro?
I don't think anyone even cares about me.
Except for my image, you know.
Daddy cared.
He felt that his son is not a vagabond.
He has talent.
"My son has a good heart."
He used to say that.
Bro. Are you okay?
No, bro.
All the elders in the family,
Uncle, aunt and mummy,
all of them are making me feel like their responsibility is on me now.
There is a lot of pressure, bro. Lots of pressure.
You bore the brunt.
You bore the brunt at a young age. I know that.
But your Vicky paaji couldn't take it.
Then I just got super f♪♪♪♪♪d up and
then I came over here.
I'm so sorry, paaji.
Everything will be okay, hereafter. Don't stress yourself.
Vicky paaji.
I'm sorry if I offended you before.
It's okay, bro.
I think the first thing that you should do is go straight home.
What are you saying, Sameer?
What?
Paaji, you can stay here for as long as you like.
- It is not a problem. - Oh, no. Let me complete...
- Sameer, you...! - Hear me out.
I am not saying anything off-beam.
All I am saying,
Vicky paaji, is that nobody is ever prepared for this situation or this time.
Nobody knows when this will happen in life.
So, you are not at fault.
Naturally, you must have thought of that "let me just avoid this,
Let me get drugged and let me ignore it."
"I shall distract myself."
But that's not right, is it?
You have a family.
They too have lost a loved one.
I mean, even your dad must have some expectations from you.
This is the time to prove yourself.
You must take care of your family. Take care of yourself.
A lot of things will change now, Vicky paaji.
I mean your role in the family will change.
Your equation with your family will change.
And you have to accept this change paaji,
To move forward in life.
Go. Go home.
Correct, bro.
- Thank you. - Yeah.
Vicky paaji.
We have changed now.
We cannot control what happens to us...
but just how we react to it.
Hey.
Leave that mattress for cute-oo.
Sleep on my mattress.
I'll feel comforted.
Come here. I love you.
Love you, cute-oo.
Vicky paaji.
Hey. One last group hug.
For old times sake.
Give me a single hug first.
You will manage, okay.
Best of luck!
Take care, paaji.
Take care of your mummy.
After a few days I shall come to stay with you.
Alright, bro.
Do that.
- Love you. - Love you.
See you.
What's wrong?
- Brother. - Hmm.
Just like you write poetry,
those two brothers party.
Everybody has some kind of passion in life.
I'm clueless. I don't know what to do.
Look, you are still young.
I don't mean that you can't have a passion
but you have a long way to go. There are so many things you have to try.
You have to get many new experiences in life.
You will know what your passion is and what you want to do.
Look, for example, our College fest is going on.
It is a great opportunity.
Several events are taking place over there.
Go over there. Take a look. Try out various things.
Then give your best to whatever you like.
Okay? Stop crying.
Are you okay?
Yes.
Are you okay, bro?
As good as I can be.
What can be done?
- Listen, bro, I... - Lakshay.
We aren't brothers anymore.
I guess we aren't even friends.
We are flat mates and
I think it would be better for us and everyone
if at least we're good flat mates.
Yeah.
Fair enough.
- Hmm? - Yeah.
So, I'll...