1 00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:11,444 (indistinct chatter in background) 2 00:00:12,245 --> 00:00:14,180 (Nat): What are you gonna do differently? 3 00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:19,252 You say the boys are gonna play like you but the chirping, 4 00:00:19,252 --> 00:00:20,754 and the lumber, and the running around 5 00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:22,489 have always been your game. 6 00:00:22,489 --> 00:00:25,091 So, if I keep this team going, 7 00:00:25,091 --> 00:00:27,694 how're you gonna raise your game? 8 00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:29,996 What are you gonna do differently? 9 00:00:37,637 --> 00:00:42,375 (heavy metal music plays) 10 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:44,137 (♪) 11 00:02:23,042 --> 00:02:25,945 (heavy metal music ends) 12 00:02:25,945 --> 00:02:28,848 (Shoresy): This team will never lose again. 13 00:02:28,848 --> 00:02:31,117 (rock music plays) 14 00:02:35,688 --> 00:02:37,957 Welcome to another edition of "Questionable Call" 15 00:02:37,957 --> 00:02:39,993 brought to you by BROdude Energy. 16 00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,594 I'm your host, Anik Archambault, 17 00:02:41,594 --> 00:02:43,997 along with our panelists, Tessa Bonhomme, 18 00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:46,399 Jay Onrait, and the man they call RA. 19 00:02:46,399 --> 00:02:48,801 Mesdames and messieurs, why save the best for last? 20 00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:50,770 We're leading with these peckerheads now? 21 00:02:50,770 --> 00:02:52,572 I take it you saw the most recent installment 22 00:02:52,572 --> 00:02:54,307 of Bulldogs Mic'd Up? 23 00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:56,142 Oui, monsieur. And here are my personal 24 00:02:56,142 --> 00:02:59,045 highlights from last week's bout with the hicks from Timmins. 25 00:02:59,879 --> 00:03:01,848 Hey, how'd that corn come in, Apeldoorn? 26 00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:03,416 She knee-high by the 4th of July? 27 00:03:03,416 --> 00:03:05,718 Hey, you ever see any crop circles out there or? 28 00:03:05,718 --> 00:03:07,620 Hey, when you're driving by a field of cows, 29 00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:09,189 how hard is it to not just pull over 30 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,891 and rope one of 'em right there? (Apeldoorn): Fuck you, Shoresy! 31 00:03:11,891 --> 00:03:13,826 There's entertainment value, I'll give you that. 32 00:03:13,826 --> 00:03:15,595 Tight competition. But the best stuff comes 33 00:03:15,595 --> 00:03:17,163 when they play Keller in North Bay. 34 00:03:17,163 --> 00:03:20,400 (Shoresy): Holy fuck, Keller, did that C get even bigger? 35 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:21,935 Should sell ads on that thing. 36 00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:23,203 You know what might look nice 37 00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:24,671 is some overhead lights right here. 38 00:03:24,671 --> 00:03:27,073 Put a missing kid on there, ya fuckin' loser! 39 00:03:27,073 --> 00:03:28,541 I love those Keller exchanges too, 40 00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:30,710 but you cannot beat the Soo. 41 00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:32,045 Hey, those visors come any darker? 42 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,680 I can still kinda see how fuckin' ugly ya are. 43 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:36,149 Is there an eclipse tonight? I can see your old lady 44 00:03:36,149 --> 00:03:38,484 in the stands up there. You should put one of those on her. 45 00:03:38,484 --> 00:03:40,253 - Are they still undefeated? - Shoresy vowed the team 46 00:03:40,253 --> 00:03:41,921 would never lose again. And well-- 47 00:03:41,921 --> 00:03:43,356 They're all losers in the NOSHO. 48 00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:44,991 After dropping the final game of the season 49 00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:46,492 to the Soo Cyclones last year, 50 00:03:46,492 --> 00:03:47,994 the Sudbury Blueberry Bulldogs 51 00:03:47,994 --> 00:03:49,495 swept the playoffs to win the league. 52 00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:51,331 Damn shame the National Senior Tournament 53 00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:53,366 was cancelled. They were on a heater! 54 00:03:53,366 --> 00:03:54,767 - They still are. - You bet, Tessa! 55 00:03:54,767 --> 00:03:57,570 The Bulldogs are on a 20-game win streak this year, 56 00:03:57,570 --> 00:04:00,740 looking to win the final four contest for a perfect season. 57 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:02,375 Never done before in the NOSHO. 58 00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:03,943 They've got the whole team buzzin' 59 00:04:03,943 --> 00:04:06,079 but big individual efforts, too. 60 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,647 Michaels is the best goalie in the NOSHO, 61 00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:10,483 and JJ Frankie JJ leads the league in goals! 62 00:04:10,483 --> 00:04:13,119 - Frankie's on top of the world. - Yeah, but they've got the new 63 00:04:13,119 --> 00:04:16,322 American expansion team twice and they're a handful. 64 00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:18,858 You know, only in the NOSHO could there exist two teams 65 00:04:18,858 --> 00:04:20,994 from the Soo. Soo, Ontario, 66 00:04:20,994 --> 00:04:22,895 and then, I didn't even know there was-- 67 00:04:22,895 --> 00:04:24,831 - Soo, Michigan, baby. - Yes, the NOSHO 68 00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:27,300 - is now a five-team league. - Yeah, but here's the problem, 69 00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:29,702 they've spent the entire season humiliating the rest 70 00:04:29,702 --> 00:04:31,004 of the league on the internet. 71 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,872 They're putting a giant target on their back. 72 00:04:32,872 --> 00:04:34,207 (crowd cheering) 73 00:04:34,207 --> 00:04:35,441 (Anik): Four games left on the campaign, 74 00:04:35,441 --> 00:04:38,444 Timmins, North Bay, Soo Michigan at home, 75 00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:40,413 then Soo Michigan again stateside. 76 00:04:40,413 --> 00:04:42,649 (Jay): You know they're all dying to spoil this 77 00:04:42,649 --> 00:04:43,650 for the Bulldogs. 78 00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:44,951 They've got bigger problems. 79 00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:46,419 Not to sound like the Bobfather here 80 00:04:46,419 --> 00:04:48,154 but you think Shoresy was bad last year 81 00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,322 trying to get them outta the bottom. 82 00:04:49,322 --> 00:04:50,790 - Yes. - I'm hearin' he's way worse 83 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:52,258 this year tryin' to keep 'em at the top. 84 00:04:52,258 --> 00:04:54,260 Whatever he's doin', it's workin'. 85 00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:56,296 No one can pass the Bulldogs for first place this year. 86 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:59,065 They've got it locked up. But with four games remaining 87 00:04:59,065 --> 00:05:01,868 and four wins away from a record-breaking season, 88 00:05:01,868 --> 00:05:03,202 it's up to the Bulldogs. 89 00:05:03,202 --> 00:05:05,938 They can be the best team in the league this year, 90 00:05:05,938 --> 00:05:08,541 or they can be the best team in the league, ever. 91 00:05:08,541 --> 00:05:11,144 Sure, Anik. What could go wrong? 92 00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:13,313 (Shoresy): We're hammerin' too much ass. 93 00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:15,682 - That's why we're here. - Well, not me. 94 00:05:15,682 --> 00:05:18,284 - I know. - Too many distractions, 95 00:05:18,284 --> 00:05:20,720 Shoresy. Priority is a perfect season. 96 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:23,189 Seriously, Nat, I want that fuckin' record but like-- 97 00:05:23,189 --> 00:05:24,657 I've got my priorities straight. 98 00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:26,459 - Sanger, don't be a pussy. - But what, slut? 99 00:05:26,459 --> 00:05:28,261 But like, the boys are right up against it. 100 00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:29,562 - Why? - Well, one, we're on 101 00:05:29,562 --> 00:05:31,064 - a 20-game heater. - And two? 102 00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:32,198 There's an impossible amount 103 00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:33,966 of good-looking girls in Sudbury. 104 00:05:33,966 --> 00:05:36,302 (sultry music plays) 105 00:05:41,541 --> 00:05:42,542 (speaking French) 106 00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:44,143 Too bad all the dudes are ugly, though. 107 00:05:44,143 --> 00:05:46,012 I was just gonna say, Ziig, your hair looks legit 108 00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,480 - good like that. - Yeah? 109 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,682 But I still think way more dudes'd be into me. 110 00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:52,418 - Guilty. - Sanger... don't be a pussy. 111 00:05:52,418 --> 00:05:53,820 She's my girlfriend, my guy. 112 00:05:53,820 --> 00:05:56,055 Yeah, but ya don't gotta be like... kee-he-he-he! 113 00:05:56,055 --> 00:05:58,191 I asked you to raise your game last year. 114 00:05:58,191 --> 00:05:59,659 - Me? - Oh, my God. 115 00:05:59,659 --> 00:06:01,361 You started working hard away from the rink, 116 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:03,796 throwing some weights around, and I will give it to you, man, 117 00:06:03,796 --> 00:06:06,099 - you got jacked. - It's the least I can do, Nat. 118 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:08,468 Seriously, thank you so much for... 119 00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:11,170 keepin' the team goin'. 120 00:06:11,170 --> 00:06:12,772 Tuck in your fuckin' tampon string. 121 00:06:12,772 --> 00:06:14,907 You answered the call. But then, you went above 122 00:06:14,907 --> 00:06:16,876 and beyond the call and you got the rest of the team 123 00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:18,745 - jacked with you. - What's good for the goose. 124 00:06:18,745 --> 00:06:20,079 Which brings us to the problem 125 00:06:20,079 --> 00:06:22,448 - of my own manufacturing. - Hammerin' too much ass? 126 00:06:22,448 --> 00:06:23,916 - Yeah-- - Huh? 127 00:06:23,916 --> 00:06:25,284 They're top of the league, defending champs, 128 00:06:25,284 --> 00:06:28,121 20-game heater, and they're the most jacked team 129 00:06:28,121 --> 00:06:30,156 in the NOSHO. Can you imagine? 130 00:06:30,156 --> 00:06:32,592 Trust me, you can't. 131 00:06:39,132 --> 00:06:42,101 (rap music plays) 132 00:06:52,211 --> 00:06:54,280 Got more ass than Kellogg's got Corn Flakes. 133 00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:56,783 I can't help but feel entirely responsible. 134 00:06:56,783 --> 00:06:58,050 - You are. - You think? 135 00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:01,454 Well... if you don't want the boys in snapper, 136 00:07:01,454 --> 00:07:04,957 definitely don't make us do a calendar of sexy photos. 137 00:07:04,957 --> 00:07:06,592 - You're right. - You're an idiot. 138 00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:08,428 I can't believe you got 'em to do that shit. 139 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,363 That calendar's gonna bite us in the ass one day, Nat. 140 00:07:10,363 --> 00:07:12,465 You look like such a fucking goof in that thing, Shoresy. 141 00:07:12,465 --> 00:07:14,867 Ziig, you got a voice that goes up one side of me 142 00:07:14,867 --> 00:07:16,936 - and right down the other. - I've got a voice? 143 00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:18,905 Yeah, and a face that makes me go, ah! 144 00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:20,940 The money from the calendars will help fund our bid 145 00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:23,075 to host the National Senior Tournament. 146 00:07:23,075 --> 00:07:24,877 It won't get cancelled again now. 147 00:07:24,877 --> 00:07:27,079 - Brilliant move, ladies. - Kee-he-he-he! 148 00:07:27,079 --> 00:07:28,948 (Nat): What's good for the goose. 149 00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:30,349 Four games left for a perfect season. 150 00:07:30,349 --> 00:07:32,685 - Keep the boys focused, slut. - I want that record. 151 00:07:32,685 --> 00:07:34,387 Make sure they get the message. 152 00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:36,122 That you want the record? 153 00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,457 The other one. 154 00:07:38,057 --> 00:07:40,159 (Shoresy): You're hammerin' too much ass. 155 00:07:40,693 --> 00:07:41,961 Well, I was more talkin' to Goody. 156 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:43,596 - Mkay. - Dolo, you're hammerin' 157 00:07:43,596 --> 00:07:45,198 - way too much ass. - Settle down. 158 00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:46,666 What am I, chopped liver? 159 00:07:46,666 --> 00:07:48,301 Well, they wheeled more than you. 160 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,635 You're some crooked aren't ya, b'y? 161 00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:50,636 You ever have foie gras? 162 00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:52,505 Yeah, like Dolo wheeled the most. 163 00:07:52,872 --> 00:07:55,208 - Goody's second. - No, foie gras. 164 00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,642 And then, you well in third. 165 00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:57,877 B'ys, he's right rotted, he is. 166 00:07:57,877 --> 00:07:59,145 I'm not saying you're ugly, 167 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:00,513 Hitch. That's not what I'm sayin'. 168 00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:02,114 - Charitable of ya, me son. - I'm just sayin' 169 00:08:02,114 --> 00:08:03,983 - you're the ugliest here. - Lard Jeezus! 170 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:05,284 - You got a dip? - Bethany? 171 00:08:05,284 --> 00:08:06,853 - (Bethany): Yeah? - Join us out 172 00:08:06,853 --> 00:08:08,321 where we're to, please? 173 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,022 (footsteps approaching) 174 00:08:10,022 --> 00:08:12,058 Bethany Dawn. 175 00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:14,026 Isn't it cute how he calls me by my full name? 176 00:08:14,026 --> 00:08:16,896 If we're becomin' one, I do ya the courtesy. 177 00:08:16,896 --> 00:08:18,264 Well, I only know your nickname. 178 00:08:18,264 --> 00:08:19,932 Well, his full name's Ted Hitchcock. 179 00:08:19,932 --> 00:08:22,568 - It's kinda funny 'cause when-- - Who's the ugliest 180 00:08:22,568 --> 00:08:24,237 outta the b'ys here where we're to? 181 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:25,238 Shoresy. 182 00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:26,873 Now, go on in out of it, me son. 183 00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:28,508 - Sorry. - Yeah, don't worry about it. 184 00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:31,777 - What's that, old man? - Should be two outta three. 185 00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:37,583 Let's get on the go! 186 00:08:37,583 --> 00:08:39,118 Melodie? 187 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,656 - Ooh. - We got a nail-biter. 188 00:08:43,656 --> 00:08:45,658 (Britt): Shoresy is the ugliest guy here. 189 00:08:45,658 --> 00:08:47,593 All right, now we're out the other end of 'er. 190 00:08:47,593 --> 00:08:50,630 - (loud belch) - Oh... Frankie is here. 191 00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:52,131 (Big Sexy): Tit fucker. (Britt): Frankie's here? 192 00:08:52,131 --> 00:08:53,566 Yeah, why do you think it smells like 193 00:08:53,566 --> 00:08:55,167 spaghetti carbonara? (Big Sexy): Tit fucker. 194 00:08:55,167 --> 00:08:57,870 Let's get some fuckin' tandoori barbecue kebabs. 195 00:08:57,870 --> 00:08:59,539 I dunno about that Quebecer b'y. 196 00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,040 Last year left us in a real pickle 197 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,476 chasin' Laurence Leboeuf back to Quebec. 198 00:09:03,476 --> 00:09:05,211 - Laurence Leboeuf? - Laurence Leboeuf? 199 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:07,446 - Well, would you chase 'er? - Yes, b'y. You? 200 00:09:07,446 --> 00:09:08,915 Was a bit young but... 201 00:09:10,716 --> 00:09:12,018 You're still the ugliest, Shoresy. 202 00:09:12,018 --> 00:09:13,319 I don't care. 203 00:09:13,319 --> 00:09:14,787 (Nat): I think he looks pretty good. 204 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:16,188 (Miig): Girl, no you don't. 205 00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:19,792 (Nat): Yeah, too much Bailey's in my coffee this morning. 206 00:09:19,792 --> 00:09:21,627 (Ziig): Just can't believe you got them to do this shit. 207 00:09:21,627 --> 00:09:22,862 (Nat): Ask and you shall receive. 208 00:09:22,862 --> 00:09:24,363 (Ziig): They knew how much ass would follow. 209 00:09:24,363 --> 00:09:26,065 (Miig): Bingo. (Ziig): Got us to 50% full. 210 00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:27,600 (Nat): Bums in seats, baby. 211 00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:29,201 (Miig): Impressive numbers for senior hockey. 212 00:09:29,201 --> 00:09:31,404 (Nat): But 50 ain't 75. 213 00:09:31,971 --> 00:09:33,239 Has Michaels been acting weird? 214 00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:35,207 (Ziig): Goalies are always weird. 215 00:09:37,510 --> 00:09:40,313 (Nat): The Wolves get so many kids out to the games. 216 00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:43,349 I love seeing that. We need to get more kids to the rink. 217 00:09:43,349 --> 00:09:44,951 (Miig): Kids in sports stay off the streets. 218 00:09:44,951 --> 00:09:47,486 (Ziig): Drugs kill dreams. 219 00:09:47,486 --> 00:09:49,322 (Nat): Yeah. 220 00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:51,724 Let's focus on the youth, ladies. 221 00:09:52,725 --> 00:09:55,695 (Ziig): Could fucking puke. Ugly. 222 00:09:55,695 --> 00:09:57,430 (Shoresy): The good thing about the calendars 223 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,565 is that none of us looked too ugly. 224 00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:03,369 Sure, we're all in top shape, b'ys. 225 00:10:03,369 --> 00:10:04,637 Why not put it up on a calendar? 226 00:10:04,637 --> 00:10:06,072 Yeah, like the calendars'll always be there 227 00:10:06,072 --> 00:10:08,174 to remind us of a time we weren't too ugly. 228 00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:10,076 One day we'll wish we're still lookin' so good 229 00:10:10,076 --> 00:10:11,510 - as what we did. - Settle down. 230 00:10:11,510 --> 00:10:14,914 But it's kinda funny. It's like, I come in, 231 00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:16,415 I take my tarp off, 232 00:10:16,415 --> 00:10:18,384 and then, we had to take all your pictures again 233 00:10:18,384 --> 00:10:20,152 because you didn't have your tarps off. 234 00:10:20,152 --> 00:10:21,721 Didn't think of it, old man. 235 00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:25,358 Well, if I'm a broad lookin' at a sexy calendar of dudes, 236 00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:27,393 I'm probably hopin' they have their tarps off. 237 00:10:27,393 --> 00:10:29,762 Too hand to the game time for a Martoonie, eh, me son? 238 00:10:29,762 --> 00:10:31,897 Those calendars are gonna bite us in the ass one day, 239 00:10:31,897 --> 00:10:34,634 boys. All right, who wants more? 240 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:37,837 One, two, three, four, fuckin' 500 probably. 241 00:10:37,837 --> 00:10:39,271 (Big Sexy): Tit fucker! 242 00:10:39,271 --> 00:10:41,107 (arena organ plays) 243 00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:43,342 (Hitch): Didn't think of the grease downs either, old man. 244 00:10:45,077 --> 00:10:47,313 Hey, we got eight Apeldoorn's on deck here, gents. 245 00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:48,514 Let's get focused here now. 246 00:10:48,514 --> 00:10:50,249 First time I've been in a room wit a dozen 247 00:10:50,249 --> 00:10:53,152 or more greased up dudes, b'ys, and might not be the last. 248 00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,723 Well, if I'm a broad lookin' at a calendar of sexy dudes 249 00:10:57,723 --> 00:10:59,358 with their tarps off, I'm probably hopin' 250 00:10:59,358 --> 00:11:01,127 - they're greased down too. - Les Jims. 251 00:11:01,127 --> 00:11:02,194 Oh, is that the Jims? 252 00:11:02,194 --> 00:11:03,362 - (Jim 1): Yeah. - Hey, Jim. 253 00:11:03,362 --> 00:11:04,363 - (Jim 2): Hello. - Jim. 254 00:11:04,363 --> 00:11:05,431 (Jim 3): Sorry we're late, Shoresy. 255 00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:06,732 We were playing Reach For The Top. 256 00:11:06,732 --> 00:11:08,501 All the b'ys with the spray tans too, look. 257 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:09,802 Well, Dolo didn't get one. 258 00:11:09,802 --> 00:11:11,570 For obvious reasons. Eh, Dolo? 259 00:11:11,570 --> 00:11:13,572 It's pretty obvious why you didn't get one, eh? 260 00:11:13,572 --> 00:11:14,840 And ain't it sum'in. 261 00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:16,542 The Jims didn't lift a single weight, 262 00:11:16,542 --> 00:11:18,477 kept der tarps on the entire time, 263 00:11:18,477 --> 00:11:20,680 and still might be d'most popular of all the b'ys. 264 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,081 Now see, that idea was all me, 265 00:11:22,081 --> 00:11:23,616 but how 'bout a little focusin' here, boys? 266 00:11:23,616 --> 00:11:25,718 - Let's get focused in here now. - Wait, are we talkin' about 267 00:11:25,718 --> 00:11:27,520 puttin' them in their jail guard uniforms? 268 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,188 Oh, see Hitch, 269 00:11:29,188 --> 00:11:32,224 Fish would be the ugliest guy in this room. 270 00:11:32,892 --> 00:11:35,194 Be a lot less ugly if you were still scorin' a goal a game. 271 00:11:35,194 --> 00:11:36,562 You know, I think the uniforms gave-- 272 00:11:36,562 --> 00:11:38,497 Shut the fuck up, Michaels. 273 00:11:39,098 --> 00:11:40,833 - (loud fart) - Well, like, if I'm a broad 274 00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:42,902 looking at a sexy calendar of greased-down dudes 275 00:11:42,902 --> 00:11:45,504 with their tarps off, I for sure wouldn't mind a few rugged men 276 00:11:45,504 --> 00:11:47,306 - in uniform sauced in there. - Settle down. 277 00:11:47,306 --> 00:11:48,941 Fuckin' bak'er right into the cake, eh Jim? 278 00:11:48,941 --> 00:11:49,909 - Yeah. - Jim? 279 00:11:49,909 --> 00:11:51,243 - Yes. - Jim? 280 00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:52,678 Traditionally, men in uniform do pretty well 281 00:11:52,678 --> 00:11:54,246 with broads, but you should still ask them 282 00:11:54,246 --> 00:11:55,748 how they're doing the odd time, too. 283 00:11:55,748 --> 00:11:57,583 (Shoresy): Big warm-up here, boys! 284 00:11:57,583 --> 00:11:58,918 Let's get the blood flowin' here now! 285 00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:00,352 (Dolo): Hey, Jim. (Jim 1): Yeah. 286 00:12:00,352 --> 00:12:01,487 Jim. (Jim 2): Hello. 287 00:12:01,487 --> 00:12:02,655 - Jim. - What's up, Dolo? 288 00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,023 What's goin' on, buddy? 289 00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:05,758 (Michaels): Trivia. It's like a trivia-- 290 00:12:05,758 --> 00:12:06,959 (Shoresy): Shut the fuck up, Michaels. 291 00:12:06,959 --> 00:12:08,527 We run a trivia league at the jail, bro. 292 00:12:08,527 --> 00:12:10,329 (Shoresy): Mental game starts in warm-up here, boys. 293 00:12:10,329 --> 00:12:12,264 Let's go now. (Hitch): But ya calls it 294 00:12:12,264 --> 00:12:13,632 - Reach For De Top? - Yeah. 295 00:12:13,632 --> 00:12:15,968 Reach For The Top's an old Canadian TV game show. 296 00:12:15,968 --> 00:12:17,536 But now it's just mostly run out of high schools. 297 00:12:17,536 --> 00:12:20,439 (Fish): And you run it outta the jail, like with the inmates? 298 00:12:20,439 --> 00:12:21,841 (Shoresy): No, with the mouses, Fish. 299 00:12:21,841 --> 00:12:23,442 Yeah, in teams of four. The inmates compete 300 00:12:23,442 --> 00:12:25,244 against each other but we also have a team of four. 301 00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:27,513 - (Michaels): Who's your fourth? - Timmins Timber Kings, boys! 302 00:12:27,513 --> 00:12:29,281 Let's get that fuckin' record! 303 00:12:30,382 --> 00:12:32,451 Are you rolling? 304 00:12:32,451 --> 00:12:33,953 Cory, are you rolling? 305 00:12:33,953 --> 00:12:35,488 Shoresy will get going before warm-up 306 00:12:35,488 --> 00:12:37,323 so you should always be rolling when they hit the ice. 307 00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:38,991 Actually, start rolling when they're in the tunnel even. 308 00:12:38,991 --> 00:12:41,594 - I'm rolling. - You know, if you clip 309 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:44,730 your walkie mic to your shoulder you can get to it a lot quicker. 310 00:12:44,730 --> 00:12:46,198 You see how I got mine? 311 00:12:46,198 --> 00:12:48,067 (Cory): I'm not doing that. 312 00:12:48,701 --> 00:12:50,436 - Why not? - 'Cause I've never seen a guy 313 00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:51,670 with a walkie clipped to his shoulder 314 00:12:51,670 --> 00:12:53,572 gettin' his dink sucked. (walkie beeps) 315 00:12:53,572 --> 00:12:55,341 Found your way outta the corn maze, eh Apeldoorn, 316 00:12:55,341 --> 00:12:57,843 - ya fuckin' loser? - Comin' for that streak, bud! 317 00:12:57,843 --> 00:13:01,046 Hey, Bill Gates buying up farmland around you guys too or? 318 00:13:01,046 --> 00:13:03,315 Wearing number 8 for the Timmins Timber Kings, 319 00:13:03,315 --> 00:13:06,352 Mervin Emmanual Moses. What a moment for this young man 320 00:13:06,352 --> 00:13:09,288 as it is no doubt the greatest moment of his entire life. 321 00:13:09,288 --> 00:13:11,891 Hey, which one are you? Fuckin' Elmer Isaac Ezekiel? 322 00:13:11,891 --> 00:13:13,459 - (Apeldoorn): You're dead. - You're dead. 323 00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:15,661 - No, I'm-I'm gonna kill ya. - I'm gonna kill you. 324 00:13:15,661 --> 00:13:17,396 I'm serious, I'll fuckin' kill ya, Shoresy. 325 00:13:17,396 --> 00:13:19,331 All right, first shift, we kill each other. 326 00:13:19,331 --> 00:13:21,834 - 20-game heater, ladies. - Let's go, 21. 327 00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:23,235 The eldest Apeldoorn's been fighting everyone 328 00:13:23,235 --> 00:13:25,704 - on the home stretch. - We'll play any way you want. 329 00:13:25,704 --> 00:13:28,007 The luxury of having a full squad of guys who will go. 330 00:13:28,007 --> 00:13:30,743 The only real fight's between our team to see who gets him. 331 00:13:30,743 --> 00:13:33,846 - Well, not all of them will go. - True. 332 00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:36,048 Yeah, but the one who won't will spear you in the face 333 00:13:36,048 --> 00:13:37,416 before you get your mitts off. 334 00:13:37,416 --> 00:13:38,584 (Sanguinet): Shoresy, you ready? 335 00:13:38,584 --> 00:13:40,319 Give your balls a tug, tit fucker. 336 00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:41,754 You're goin'! (Team): Yaa-hoo! 337 00:13:41,754 --> 00:13:43,422 (Sanguinet): Frankie, you ready? (Frankie belches) 338 00:13:43,422 --> 00:13:45,224 You're goin'! (Team): Yaa-hoo! 339 00:13:45,224 --> 00:13:47,359 - Goody, you ready? - Let's fuckin' go, Sanger. 340 00:13:47,359 --> 00:13:49,261 Good 'cause you're goin'! (Team): Yaa-hoo! 341 00:13:49,261 --> 00:13:51,564 - Hitch, you ready? - All hands, b'ys! 342 00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:53,299 Good 'cause you're goin'! (Team): Yaa-hoo! 343 00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:55,434 Dolo, run 'em up and fill 'em in? 344 00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:57,403 Good 'cause you're fuckin' goin! 345 00:13:57,403 --> 00:13:59,371 - (Team): Yaa-hoo! - The best goalie in the NOSHO, 346 00:13:59,371 --> 00:14:01,273 - Michaels, are you ready? - You're damn right, Sanger! 347 00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:02,675 Good, 'cause you're fuckin' goin'! 348 00:14:02,675 --> 00:14:05,444 - (Team): Yaa-hoo! - Pack mentality, boys! 349 00:14:07,413 --> 00:14:10,216 (electronic music plays) 350 00:14:34,073 --> 00:14:37,243 (music intensifies) 351 00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,759 (crowd cheers and boos) 352 00:15:02,334 --> 00:15:03,469 (crowd cheers) 353 00:15:03,469 --> 00:15:05,304 (Shoresy): Who's gonna set the tone, boys? 354 00:15:05,304 --> 00:15:06,572 Who's gonna fuckin' set it?! 355 00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:08,340 (crowd cheering) 356 00:15:08,340 --> 00:15:10,843 (players shouting indistinctly) 357 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:15,681 (players): Yeah! 358 00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:21,754 (crowd cheers loudly) 359 00:15:24,790 --> 00:15:26,558 (horn buzzes) 360 00:15:28,227 --> 00:15:29,495 Another goose egg for Michaels. 361 00:15:29,495 --> 00:15:30,663 Best goalie in the league. 362 00:15:30,663 --> 00:15:32,197 He has been acting weird though. 363 00:15:32,197 --> 00:15:33,632 Goalies are always weird. 364 00:15:34,733 --> 00:15:36,602 - What? - Listen. 365 00:15:36,602 --> 00:15:38,037 (indistinct shouting) 366 00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:39,438 (Shoresy): Fuck's sake! 367 00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:41,607 We thought he was bad trying to get us outta the bottom. 368 00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:43,676 He is way worse trying to keep us at the top. 369 00:15:43,676 --> 00:15:46,946 (indistinct shouting) 370 00:15:47,313 --> 00:15:48,681 (Drumstick clunks) You wanna chit-chat 371 00:15:48,681 --> 00:15:50,015 with Apeldoorn between plays? 372 00:15:50,015 --> 00:15:52,117 Go fuck him up the ass and get it over with! 373 00:15:52,117 --> 00:15:55,354 We only get fuckin' two on the Timmins Timber Kings? 374 00:15:55,354 --> 00:15:57,523 Half these guys worked a fuckin' 12-hour shift. 375 00:15:57,523 --> 00:15:58,590 We only get fuckin' two? 376 00:15:58,590 --> 00:16:00,225 We've got the fuckin' Yanks next week. 377 00:16:00,225 --> 00:16:02,061 We have the fuckin' Yanks next week! 378 00:16:02,061 --> 00:16:03,696 Bet they're over there with a bag of trans fats 379 00:16:03,696 --> 00:16:06,231 havin' a good fuckin' laugh at us. Hey! 380 00:16:06,231 --> 00:16:07,733 You only get a stick if you played 381 00:16:07,733 --> 00:16:10,069 more than five minutes. (Drumsticks clattering) 382 00:16:10,069 --> 00:16:11,971 The useless don't get a stick 383 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:14,306 'cause the rest of ya can only get two fuckin' tucks. 384 00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:17,142 Fish! You used a get a goal a fuckin' game. 385 00:16:17,142 --> 00:16:19,411 - How many'd ya get tonight? Huh? - Zero. 386 00:16:19,411 --> 00:16:22,181 - And the game before that? - Zero. 387 00:16:22,181 --> 00:16:23,582 - And the game before that? - Zero! 388 00:16:23,582 --> 00:16:25,751 - You don't get one either! - But they didn't get any. 389 00:16:25,751 --> 00:16:27,252 Yeah, if it weren't for fuckin' Michaels, 390 00:16:27,252 --> 00:16:28,921 the streak'd be over. (Michaels): Thank you, Shoresy. 391 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:30,556 - Shut the fuck up, Michaels! - Two-nothing lead's 392 00:16:30,556 --> 00:16:32,658 - the worst lead in hockey. - And quit playin' the puck 393 00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:34,526 so much. Think you're fuckin' Marty Turco? 394 00:16:34,526 --> 00:16:36,495 (Drumstick clatters) 395 00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:39,231 We were flat as my grade 4 girlfriend 396 00:16:39,231 --> 00:16:40,733 before Jim stepped in. 397 00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,434 Thanks, Shoresy. I think any one of these guys 398 00:16:42,434 --> 00:16:43,936 - would have done the same-- - Thanks, Jim! 399 00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:46,772 What happened to "They don't ask how, they ask how many?" 400 00:16:46,772 --> 00:16:48,540 - I'm asking how many! - He's asking how many! 401 00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:50,409 - I'm asking how many! - He's fucking asking how many! 402 00:16:50,409 --> 00:16:52,177 - Two isn't fuckin' enough! - Yeah! 403 00:16:57,616 --> 00:17:00,953 (rap music plays) 404 00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:23,742 (Nat): Is he all right? (Miig): He's acting weird. 405 00:17:23,742 --> 00:17:25,177 (Ziig): Goalies are always weird. 406 00:17:25,177 --> 00:17:26,478 Two goals on Timmins? 407 00:17:26,478 --> 00:17:28,313 I swear, if Frankie wasn't tucking two a game-- 408 00:17:28,313 --> 00:17:31,417 - Frankie's on top of the world. - Look at them. 409 00:17:32,084 --> 00:17:33,485 No wonder they have no legs in the third. 410 00:17:33,485 --> 00:17:35,320 (Miig): They already played a period between the sheets. 411 00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:36,655 (Ziig): Perks of being number one. 412 00:17:36,655 --> 00:17:37,890 Too many distractions. 413 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:38,991 Shoresy's on it. 414 00:17:38,991 --> 00:17:40,459 You know he wants that fucking record, Nat. 415 00:17:40,459 --> 00:17:42,561 - (Miig laughs) - Look at you! 416 00:17:42,561 --> 00:17:43,729 Go home, you're drunk. 417 00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:45,664 Okay, Shoresy is a dumb, ugly slut. 418 00:17:45,664 --> 00:17:47,733 - Okay, she's back. - Dumbest, ugliest slut 419 00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:49,635 - we've got maybe. - I knew she was still in there. 420 00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:51,970 But that dude commits. 421 00:17:51,970 --> 00:17:54,540 (indistinct chatter) 422 00:17:54,540 --> 00:17:56,675 (Miig): Loves to win. 423 00:17:56,675 --> 00:17:57,976 (Nat): Hates to lose. 424 00:17:57,976 --> 00:18:00,179 (Ziig): Doesn't matter how long it takes to get it. 425 00:18:00,179 --> 00:18:03,115 If he wants it, he'll work. 426 00:18:04,683 --> 00:18:06,385 Guess the rest of them just have to decide. 427 00:18:06,385 --> 00:18:09,455 Yeah. Do they wanna be the best team in the league 428 00:18:09,455 --> 00:18:11,123 this year, or do they wanna be 429 00:18:11,123 --> 00:18:13,125 the best team in the league ever? 430 00:18:13,125 --> 00:18:15,961 - Better decide quick. - Mm-hmm. 431 00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:19,064 'Cause they're comin'. 432 00:18:19,064 --> 00:18:21,366 (music intensifies)