1 00:01:07,571 --> 00:01:12,619 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com. 2 00:01:12,644 --> 00:01:15,144 Resync'd for SNEAkY by CookiesMonsta 3 00:01:15,474 --> 00:01:18,977 I got 'em when I was 15, and then, like, 19, 4 00:01:18,978 --> 00:01:21,979 and then other times, but I never got it on my arms. 5 00:01:21,980 --> 00:01:24,524 And I haven't even been putting 'em near nobody's cha-cha... 6 00:01:24,525 --> 00:01:28,403 except for, like, once, and it was a while ago and by accident. 7 00:01:28,404 --> 00:01:30,530 You don't get crabs on your arms. 8 00:01:30,531 --> 00:01:33,024 So, what? I got imitation crabs? 9 00:01:33,742 --> 00:01:35,068 Shit. 10 00:01:36,412 --> 00:01:38,329 It's fuckin' bedbugs. 11 00:01:38,330 --> 00:01:39,497 Like scabies? 12 00:01:39,498 --> 00:01:41,207 I thought it was crabs. 13 00:01:41,208 --> 00:01:42,958 Me, too. 14 00:01:42,959 --> 00:01:44,870 I miss Ian. 15 00:01:45,212 --> 00:01:48,089 - Aw, that's so sweet. - Ugh. 16 00:01:48,090 --> 00:01:49,715 You got some shampoo or something? 17 00:01:49,716 --> 00:01:52,593 They don't live on you, just in your sheets and clothes and shit. 18 00:01:52,594 --> 00:01:54,054 So now we gotta wash everything. 19 00:01:54,055 --> 00:01:55,221 What, you gave 'em to me? 20 00:01:55,222 --> 00:01:56,764 Someone gave it to me first. 21 00:01:56,765 --> 00:01:58,308 - Fuck! - What's going on? 22 00:01:58,309 --> 00:01:59,850 Flaca's got scabies. 23 00:01:59,851 --> 00:02:02,520 - It's bedbugs. It's different. - Cooties are cooties. 24 00:02:02,521 --> 00:02:04,314 I probably got it from your dirty little sister. 25 00:02:04,315 --> 00:02:06,691 They probably been living in your hairy Chia Pet poon 26 00:02:06,692 --> 00:02:07,775 since before you got here. 27 00:02:07,776 --> 00:02:09,819 First of all, I keep my lawn mowed. 28 00:02:09,820 --> 00:02:11,279 Second, weren't no problems 29 00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:15,116 till Pocket Daya snuck in last week to follow in the family footsteps. 30 00:02:15,117 --> 00:02:16,867 Eat it. 31 00:02:16,868 --> 00:02:17,952 They got scabies. 32 00:02:17,953 --> 00:02:19,995 Bedbugs, and it's Flaca. 33 00:02:19,996 --> 00:02:22,790 _ 34 00:02:22,791 --> 00:02:24,292 Now what? 35 00:02:24,293 --> 00:02:26,086 _ 36 00:02:26,087 --> 00:02:27,996 Ay, dios. We're all gonna get 'em. 37 00:02:28,964 --> 00:02:30,965 - You don't have a magic cure or something? - Hey, hey, hey. 38 00:02:30,966 --> 00:02:32,050 _ 39 00:02:32,051 --> 00:02:33,176 I just walked up. 40 00:02:33,177 --> 00:02:34,635 _ 41 00:02:34,636 --> 00:02:36,137 No. 42 00:02:36,138 --> 00:02:37,430 So what? 43 00:02:37,431 --> 00:02:40,058 You hear the one about the pregnant bedbug? 44 00:02:40,059 --> 00:02:42,185 She gave birth in the spring. 45 00:02:42,186 --> 00:02:45,062 But these are just pads. We don't got bedsprings. 46 00:02:45,063 --> 00:02:46,147 Oh, Jesus. 47 00:02:46,148 --> 00:02:48,266 Okay, everybody, start stripping the beds! 48 00:02:50,319 --> 00:02:52,195 Fuck! 49 00:02:52,196 --> 00:02:53,488 Attention, ladies, 50 00:02:53,489 --> 00:02:56,241 remember to remove all pens from your uniform 51 00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:58,735 when dropping off your laundry. 52 00:03:03,081 --> 00:03:04,491 Red, you're back... 53 00:03:07,253 --> 00:03:08,954 and you're not talking to me. 54 00:03:11,798 --> 00:03:13,124 Now what did I do? 55 00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:19,347 My post-slock resolution was to stop giving liars second chances. 56 00:03:19,348 --> 00:03:20,924 When did I lie to you? 57 00:03:23,769 --> 00:03:27,806 "Business is booming. There's a line out the door." 58 00:03:28,690 --> 00:03:30,150 You were much more convincing 59 00:03:30,151 --> 00:03:32,652 than my husband, but you were just as stupid. 60 00:03:32,653 --> 00:03:35,029 You could have said you didn't make your way there. 61 00:03:35,030 --> 00:03:39,943 Instead, you said... you ate my vatrushkis. 62 00:03:40,744 --> 00:03:42,828 I'm sorry. 63 00:03:42,829 --> 00:03:44,914 I... 64 00:03:44,915 --> 00:03:46,957 I thought that I was doing the right thing. 65 00:03:46,958 --> 00:03:48,543 By lying? 66 00:03:48,544 --> 00:03:50,545 We read different children's books. 67 00:03:50,546 --> 00:03:55,383 You know... many cultures value a person's dignity over the truth. 68 00:03:55,384 --> 00:03:57,593 In Korea, they actually call it kibun. 69 00:03:57,594 --> 00:03:59,887 I heard that on The World with Marco Werman. 70 00:03:59,888 --> 00:04:02,432 In Russia, we call it "bullshit." 71 00:04:02,433 --> 00:04:04,434 Look, there was nothing you could do about it, 72 00:04:04,435 --> 00:04:06,720 and I thought that I was saving you some pain. 73 00:04:07,438 --> 00:04:09,814 You thought if you didn't bring me bad news, 74 00:04:09,815 --> 00:04:11,600 I won't kill the messenger. 75 00:04:12,318 --> 00:04:17,731 I said what I said because I am a nice person and it felt right. 76 00:04:18,449 --> 00:04:21,902 Nice is for cowards and Democrats. 77 00:04:23,078 --> 00:04:24,988 You're a selfish little person. 78 00:04:25,706 --> 00:04:27,741 You wanted me to like you. 79 00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:30,869 Now I like you less. 80 00:04:33,339 --> 00:04:34,540 Next. 81 00:04:35,299 --> 00:04:39,461 Powell. P-O-W-E-double-L. 82 00:04:39,803 --> 00:04:42,005 Ah, here you are. ID? 83 00:04:44,015 --> 00:04:48,178 - Oh, Bennett. Good. - You're George's friend. 84 00:04:48,895 --> 00:04:51,063 - Uh... Yeah, George? - My son. 85 00:04:51,064 --> 00:04:52,808 He used to work here. George Mendez. 86 00:04:55,026 --> 00:04:59,815 His father, my first husband, is Cuban. I never could resist an accent. 87 00:05:00,866 --> 00:05:03,944 Guess that runs in the family. 88 00:05:05,704 --> 00:05:10,033 I'm sorry. That was a coping mechanism. 89 00:05:11,084 --> 00:05:12,918 Uh... 90 00:05:12,919 --> 00:05:15,546 Thank you. 91 00:05:15,547 --> 00:05:16,748 George, um... 92 00:05:18,425 --> 00:05:21,753 George says he loves her. What do you think? 93 00:05:23,305 --> 00:05:27,092 I... I don't know. Maybe. 94 00:05:29,436 --> 00:05:31,513 I'm sorry, who are you here to see? 95 00:05:34,775 --> 00:05:37,151 I know I need to apologize, 96 00:05:37,152 --> 00:05:39,737 but "I'm sorry" feels a little inadequate. 97 00:05:39,738 --> 00:05:42,031 That baby's got my daughter out to here 98 00:05:42,032 --> 00:05:44,617 and it's too late to Dyson it out of her. 99 00:05:44,618 --> 00:05:47,537 So I hope you're here for more than a clean conscience. 100 00:05:47,538 --> 00:05:50,290 I'm a concerned grandmother just like you are. 101 00:05:50,291 --> 00:05:52,833 Although you look nothing like a grandmother. 102 00:05:52,834 --> 00:05:55,210 Hispanic women have amazing skin. 103 00:05:55,211 --> 00:05:57,713 Let's hope the baby gets my complexion. 104 00:05:57,714 --> 00:06:00,083 What's it gettin' from you? 105 00:06:02,135 --> 00:06:03,837 I know that... 106 00:06:04,930 --> 00:06:09,350 nothing can ever undo what my son did, but... 107 00:06:09,351 --> 00:06:10,560 this child is part of my family. 108 00:06:10,561 --> 00:06:12,353 He's gonna live with my family. 109 00:06:12,354 --> 00:06:15,481 Your... husband? 110 00:06:15,482 --> 00:06:17,483 My domestic partner. 111 00:06:17,484 --> 00:06:21,404 Who is not actually related to the baby by blood. 112 00:06:21,405 --> 00:06:25,658 No blood, but he's got the sweat and tears part down. 113 00:06:25,659 --> 00:06:29,445 He's takin' real good care of my babies, and he'll do the same for Daya. 114 00:06:32,624 --> 00:06:35,285 I want to adopt the child. 115 00:06:37,921 --> 00:06:43,209 I'm... up nights... haunted... 116 00:06:47,013 --> 00:06:50,057 I can't bear the thought of the baby winding up like... 117 00:06:50,058 --> 00:06:51,851 Go ahead, say it. 118 00:06:51,852 --> 00:06:53,185 Like her mother? 119 00:06:53,186 --> 00:06:56,222 Like George. 120 00:06:59,234 --> 00:07:01,902 So... you want to raise the baby 121 00:07:01,903 --> 00:07:05,197 so it don't turn out like the baby you raised? 122 00:07:05,198 --> 00:07:07,116 I have two other boys. 123 00:07:07,117 --> 00:07:11,329 One is in dental school and the other is an art historian. 124 00:07:11,330 --> 00:07:15,333 So you raised a sadist, a dentist and a homo. 125 00:07:15,334 --> 00:07:17,167 Two sadists and a homo. 126 00:07:17,168 --> 00:07:19,587 Okay, look... 127 00:07:19,588 --> 00:07:23,966 you have every right to hate me and George... 128 00:07:23,967 --> 00:07:25,718 but... 129 00:07:25,719 --> 00:07:27,720 I can do right by this child. 130 00:07:27,721 --> 00:07:31,724 I can offer love and... attention 131 00:07:31,725 --> 00:07:34,560 and a certain... lifestyle. 132 00:07:34,561 --> 00:07:37,104 Money don't mean nothing to a child... 133 00:07:37,105 --> 00:07:40,733 - No, but I... - You're not listening. 134 00:07:40,734 --> 00:07:42,518 To a child. 135 00:07:43,695 --> 00:07:48,024 But my daughter... can't be un-raped... 136 00:07:49,034 --> 00:07:53,746 and she's gonna suffer bad emotionals her whole life. 137 00:07:53,747 --> 00:07:55,873 We all are. 138 00:07:55,874 --> 00:07:57,492 Well... 139 00:08:01,004 --> 00:08:03,756 I know money could never make that right, 140 00:08:03,757 --> 00:08:07,760 but of course, I would want to help the mother of my grandchild 141 00:08:07,761 --> 00:08:09,838 in any way I could. 142 00:08:12,474 --> 00:08:15,260 Perhaps on a monthly basis. 143 00:08:18,354 --> 00:08:21,432 And the grandmother of your grandchild? 144 00:08:22,150 --> 00:08:23,568 Of course. 145 00:08:23,569 --> 00:08:25,561 That's the team spirit. 146 00:08:38,542 --> 00:08:41,210 Hey... lady guards only. 147 00:08:41,211 --> 00:08:44,589 Your mom is in visitation right now with Mendez's mother. 148 00:08:44,590 --> 00:08:46,549 - What the fuck? - Yeah, did you know she was coming? 149 00:08:46,550 --> 00:08:49,009 - What are they talking about? - I don't know. 150 00:08:49,010 --> 00:08:51,504 Lady Pornstache wrote me a letter. She wanted to meet... 151 00:08:52,764 --> 00:08:54,557 but I said no. 152 00:08:54,558 --> 00:08:57,768 I mean, I didn't say nothing which means I said no. 153 00:08:57,769 --> 00:09:00,896 Aleida must've written her. 154 00:09:02,608 --> 00:09:06,611 Relax. It's my baby, ours. 155 00:09:06,612 --> 00:09:09,572 Aleida's just probably trying to shake her down. 156 00:09:09,573 --> 00:09:12,525 Everything's gonna be fine. 157 00:09:13,201 --> 00:09:16,404 I don't usually get to see this much of you all at once. 158 00:09:17,163 --> 00:09:19,164 You like it? 159 00:09:19,165 --> 00:09:20,533 You're into big bellies? 160 00:09:23,670 --> 00:09:26,088 Listen up, ladies! 161 00:09:26,089 --> 00:09:30,885 Until every uniform in this prison is washed and re-washed... 162 00:09:30,886 --> 00:09:35,347 you'll be wearing Office Depot's... new fall line. 163 00:09:35,348 --> 00:09:36,431 Oh, you gotta be kidding me! 164 00:09:36,432 --> 00:09:38,267 I ain't wearing that fucking paper shit. 165 00:09:38,268 --> 00:09:41,512 That's my color. I'm wearing it. 166 00:09:44,941 --> 00:09:47,359 There is one maternity-sized paper suit. 167 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,194 I suggest you grab it... 168 00:09:49,195 --> 00:09:53,399 before one of your plus-sized dorm-mates claims it for her food baby. 169 00:09:57,996 --> 00:10:00,873 I asked you more than once to stay away from her 170 00:10:00,874 --> 00:10:04,960 and yet, with the whole dorm half-naked, here you are. 171 00:10:04,961 --> 00:10:06,454 I'm writing you up, Bennett. 172 00:10:07,964 --> 00:10:10,966 Mendez's mother is meeting with Aleida Diaz. 173 00:10:10,967 --> 00:10:13,969 I don't care... and neither should you. 174 00:10:13,970 --> 00:10:17,139 That's my kid we're talking about here. 175 00:10:17,140 --> 00:10:19,892 This is not 3 Men and a Baby. 176 00:10:19,893 --> 00:10:24,313 You and Mendez are not Guttenberg and Selleck. 177 00:10:24,314 --> 00:10:28,734 You are two morons and a ward of the state. 178 00:10:28,735 --> 00:10:31,987 Let go. Let go of the dream. 179 00:10:31,988 --> 00:10:33,648 Mr. Caputo. 180 00:10:34,032 --> 00:10:35,908 One box per dorm. That's all there was. 181 00:10:35,909 --> 00:10:38,578 I can't walk around 182 00:10:38,579 --> 00:10:42,331 in my butt-bag panties and my granny bra. 183 00:10:42,332 --> 00:10:44,834 There are more paper uniforms on their way. 184 00:10:44,835 --> 00:10:46,702 And they'll get here when? 185 00:10:48,171 --> 00:10:50,214 Sometime soon... 186 00:10:50,215 --> 00:10:51,757 hopefully. 187 00:10:51,758 --> 00:10:54,093 Uh, be thankful the weather is nice. 188 00:10:55,679 --> 00:10:58,639 - CO Bennett, make yourself useful. - Sir? 189 00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:00,808 Go down to the storage room. 190 00:11:00,809 --> 00:11:03,143 Don't come back until you find some uniforms 191 00:11:03,144 --> 00:11:05,646 or something uniform-like and disposable. 192 00:11:05,647 --> 00:11:08,016 Sir. Yes, sir. 193 00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:10,525 Where's the S1? 194 00:11:19,327 --> 00:11:22,697 Corporal John Bennett reporting as ordered, Sergeant. 195 00:11:23,498 --> 00:11:26,541 Care to let me in on the joke, Corporal Whoever-the-fuck-you-are? 196 00:11:26,542 --> 00:11:29,253 No disrespect, Sergeant. Just ready to get in the shit. 197 00:11:29,254 --> 00:11:31,081 Well, look at that, Goggles! 198 00:11:31,923 --> 00:11:35,751 Corporal America is here to save us from the ragheads. 199 00:11:36,344 --> 00:11:37,594 Hooah! 200 00:11:37,595 --> 00:11:39,881 IA, fall in! 201 00:11:41,725 --> 00:11:42,926 Rifle. 202 00:11:48,606 --> 00:11:52,151 You know, it's always the guy who thinks he's John Wayne McCain 203 00:11:52,152 --> 00:11:54,779 who shits his pants and needs rescuing. 204 00:11:54,780 --> 00:11:58,407 But out here, we prefer to let the camel cowboys do the dying. 205 00:11:58,408 --> 00:12:00,986 It's their goddamn country. 206 00:12:03,204 --> 00:12:06,666 Look at you, all nicely starched. 207 00:12:06,667 --> 00:12:08,042 I have a travel iron. 208 00:12:13,631 --> 00:12:16,550 I smell a fobbit. You know what a fobbit is? 209 00:12:16,551 --> 00:12:19,011 - I'm not... - Not what I asked! 210 00:12:19,012 --> 00:12:22,048 Army hobbit. Too chicken to leave his forward operating base. 211 00:12:22,808 --> 00:12:25,184 You think this shitbag's a fobbit? 212 00:12:25,185 --> 00:12:27,352 Maybe. Don't know... 213 00:12:27,353 --> 00:12:29,188 but he's got the whitest teeth I've ever seen. 214 00:12:29,189 --> 00:12:30,690 Sergeant, I am not a coward, 215 00:12:30,691 --> 00:12:33,192 and I'm sure as shit not sorry I'm squared away. 216 00:12:33,193 --> 00:12:36,271 I'm here to soldier, save lives and get some. 217 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:47,532 Jesus. What a cluster-knuckle. 218 00:12:48,333 --> 00:12:50,285 Could this be our fault? 219 00:12:52,713 --> 00:12:55,380 - The new couch? - I did an inspection at the curb. 220 00:12:55,381 --> 00:12:59,051 We're okay except for the mystery stain, but we febrezed. 221 00:12:59,052 --> 00:13:03,263 If anybody asks anything... it came from JC Penney. 222 00:13:03,264 --> 00:13:06,141 Work line, cell block A, 10 minutes. 223 00:13:06,142 --> 00:13:10,931 Bell, Hartford jail's got six boxes of paper suits they're willing to part with. 224 00:13:11,857 --> 00:13:14,691 Cost me 300 pairs of tube socks I actually don't have, 225 00:13:14,692 --> 00:13:17,020 but that's a future me problem. 226 00:13:17,528 --> 00:13:20,030 Have Doggett drive you and Maxwell after lunch. 227 00:13:20,031 --> 00:13:21,857 Roger that. 228 00:13:25,203 --> 00:13:27,454 Looks like it's spreading. 229 00:13:27,455 --> 00:13:29,832 The only thing spreading is rumors. 230 00:13:29,833 --> 00:13:32,910 It was an isolated event that's been... 231 00:13:34,420 --> 00:13:36,289 isolated. 232 00:13:39,009 --> 00:13:41,752 I forgot something in the office. 233 00:13:50,561 --> 00:13:52,013 Uh-uh. 234 00:13:53,189 --> 00:13:54,356 Walk. That's right. 235 00:13:54,357 --> 00:13:58,019 Just walk away, Renee. 236 00:14:01,031 --> 00:14:02,782 What... 237 00:14:02,783 --> 00:14:05,367 You smell like Arthur Avenue. 238 00:14:05,368 --> 00:14:08,578 Whatever, okay? GloNo's makin' me bedbug-proof. 239 00:14:08,579 --> 00:14:11,206 - GloNo? - Gloria and Norma. 240 00:14:11,207 --> 00:14:12,332 Oh, hell no. 241 00:14:12,333 --> 00:14:15,585 Hey, look, whatever you wanna call 'em, they for real, all right? 242 00:14:15,586 --> 00:14:16,962 Especially Norma. 243 00:14:16,963 --> 00:14:20,507 She got that whole magic mute thing going on. 244 00:14:20,508 --> 00:14:24,094 Look, and this makes sense, okay? Bedbugs drink our blood. 245 00:14:24,095 --> 00:14:27,264 They're bugs, not Dracula. 246 00:14:27,265 --> 00:14:30,267 And now that you been necklace shopping in Burritoville, 247 00:14:30,268 --> 00:14:32,019 you gettin' 'em for sure. 248 00:14:32,020 --> 00:14:33,562 - Man, why they still makin' our food... - Whatever. 249 00:14:33,563 --> 00:14:36,356 ...when they're the infested ones? 250 00:14:36,357 --> 00:14:37,441 Oh, shit. 251 00:14:37,442 --> 00:14:38,943 - Ew! - Why you... 252 00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:41,320 No, it's protein. 253 00:14:41,321 --> 00:14:44,607 Crunch. It's all good. 254 00:14:46,868 --> 00:14:48,410 Hey, you're scratching. 255 00:14:48,411 --> 00:14:51,872 It ain't real, man. It's... a ghost itch. 256 00:14:51,873 --> 00:14:53,707 - Mmm. - Power of persuasion. 257 00:14:53,708 --> 00:14:55,918 Power of you ain't take a shower in three days, 258 00:14:55,919 --> 00:14:57,627 that might be why you're scratching. 259 00:14:57,628 --> 00:14:59,171 What you care? 260 00:14:59,172 --> 00:15:03,508 Poor personal hygiene can be a sign of depression. 261 00:15:03,509 --> 00:15:05,677 Man, I ain't depressed. 262 00:15:05,678 --> 00:15:07,054 Oh. 263 00:15:07,055 --> 00:15:09,932 The line's been long in the showers since it started getting hot, 264 00:15:09,933 --> 00:15:14,103 but I been washing my pits, tits and naughty bits in the sink. 265 00:15:14,104 --> 00:15:15,395 Well, thank you for that. 266 00:15:15,396 --> 00:15:18,232 Look, you don't wanna be forced to take a shower like Asia Girl, 267 00:15:18,233 --> 00:15:21,693 don't get so ripe you go rotten. All I'm saying. 268 00:15:21,694 --> 00:15:25,322 Okay, maybe you got a point... but it ain't bugs. 269 00:15:25,323 --> 00:15:26,899 Man, come on, man. 270 00:15:28,493 --> 00:15:30,119 Uh-uh! 271 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:32,621 Forrest Gump... seat's taken. 272 00:15:32,622 --> 00:15:35,040 Yeah... blackies only. 273 00:15:35,041 --> 00:15:38,293 But I got just as much of a right to this seat as you do. 274 00:15:38,294 --> 00:15:41,005 I mean, this place is full today... 275 00:15:41,006 --> 00:15:43,173 - and you're discriminating me. - Yes. 276 00:15:43,174 --> 00:15:46,301 Rosa Parks could walk through that door, but she got bedbugs... 277 00:15:46,302 --> 00:15:49,804 bitch, her ass going to the back of the bus same as you. 278 00:15:49,805 --> 00:15:52,016 Who's gonna stop me, though... 279 00:15:52,017 --> 00:15:54,268 now that your big-haired mammy's in hell, 280 00:15:54,269 --> 00:15:57,479 takin' Satan's three-pronged penis up her butt? 281 00:15:58,648 --> 00:16:00,149 - No! - Warren! 282 00:16:00,150 --> 00:16:02,943 - Man, chill out. - Do I need to write you a shot? 283 00:16:02,944 --> 00:16:04,611 No, no, no, no, no. She's good. 284 00:16:04,612 --> 00:16:07,031 She just had a little too much spicy. That's all. 285 00:16:07,032 --> 00:16:09,199 Give me the potato... now. 286 00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:10,985 Give me the potato. 287 00:16:11,619 --> 00:16:13,828 I got you. You good. 288 00:16:13,829 --> 00:16:15,622 - Yes. - Sit down. 289 00:16:15,623 --> 00:16:17,582 We good, Suzanne. We good. 290 00:16:17,583 --> 00:16:19,834 - We good. - We good, Officer Bell. 291 00:16:19,835 --> 00:16:21,121 We... 292 00:16:22,547 --> 00:16:25,549 - I will potato her at a future time. - I know. 293 00:16:25,550 --> 00:16:29,670 Get your lunch to go, Doggett. We got van duty. 294 00:16:32,307 --> 00:16:33,674 Bitch, bye. 295 00:16:35,435 --> 00:16:36,643 You not hungry? 296 00:16:36,644 --> 00:16:39,180 I'm not standing in that parade of tits and ass. 297 00:16:39,981 --> 00:16:42,649 You secretly love this. 298 00:16:42,650 --> 00:16:44,651 Some things are better left mysteries. 299 00:16:44,652 --> 00:16:46,653 Do you wanna borrow my paper bottoms? 300 00:16:46,654 --> 00:16:48,948 Because I could rip them off and just give them to you. 301 00:16:48,949 --> 00:16:51,033 Come on. 302 00:16:51,034 --> 00:16:52,860 Give mama a smile! 303 00:16:54,329 --> 00:16:56,956 Do you remember what Kubra used to say? 304 00:16:56,957 --> 00:16:58,040 Uh-uh. 305 00:16:58,041 --> 00:17:00,084 "A smile is like tight underwear. 306 00:17:00,085 --> 00:17:02,703 - It lifts your cheeks." - "It lifts your cheeks." 307 00:17:03,463 --> 00:17:05,797 He's gonna kill me, you know. 308 00:17:05,798 --> 00:17:08,376 Alex... 309 00:17:09,302 --> 00:17:13,472 I really thought they would put him away... 310 00:17:13,473 --> 00:17:15,300 and I'd be out... 311 00:17:18,394 --> 00:17:22,064 Fuck, I'm fucking suffocating. 312 00:17:22,065 --> 00:17:25,275 Alex, you will survive because it's what you do. 313 00:17:25,276 --> 00:17:28,112 Yeah... like a cockroach. 314 00:17:28,113 --> 00:17:30,489 Maybe that's your spirit animal. 315 00:17:30,490 --> 00:17:32,491 I know that you're trying to make me feel better, 316 00:17:32,492 --> 00:17:34,576 but really think about what you just said to me. 317 00:17:34,577 --> 00:17:36,245 You know, they really get a bad rap. 318 00:17:36,246 --> 00:17:38,998 They were the first animals to ever mate in space. 319 00:17:38,999 --> 00:17:42,542 They live in tight colonies because they just love being touched 320 00:17:42,543 --> 00:17:46,831 and they can carry cigarettes. They're bad bitches. 321 00:17:48,716 --> 00:17:50,960 I can't be here right now. 322 00:17:52,428 --> 00:17:55,139 I mean, seriously, what the fuck is going on? 323 00:17:55,140 --> 00:17:58,392 Man, it's like six early releases this month. 324 00:17:58,393 --> 00:17:59,476 Yeah, 325 00:17:59,477 --> 00:18:03,605 bullshit sentences for minor drug crimes just aren't enforced like they used to be. 326 00:18:03,606 --> 00:18:06,058 Speaking of minor drug crimes... 327 00:18:06,484 --> 00:18:08,485 Our smack scheme is no minor offense. 328 00:18:08,486 --> 00:18:11,613 Really? You couldn't come up with a code word or something for that? 329 00:18:11,614 --> 00:18:12,906 Fine. 330 00:18:12,907 --> 00:18:14,574 Getting caught with that many Jujubes 331 00:18:14,575 --> 00:18:16,951 will get our candy asses kicked down to max for a decade. 332 00:18:16,952 --> 00:18:19,913 No, we have come too close for you to puss out on me now. 333 00:18:19,914 --> 00:18:22,582 I will smother you in your sleep. 334 00:18:22,583 --> 00:18:25,002 Red concreted our shipping route. 335 00:18:25,003 --> 00:18:26,753 All the coke kitties are getting out, 336 00:18:26,754 --> 00:18:30,424 and maybe, like, the universe is just trying to send us a message. 337 00:18:30,425 --> 00:18:31,966 Bitch, please. 338 00:18:31,967 --> 00:18:34,178 All those girls had no time left on their sentences. 339 00:18:34,179 --> 00:18:35,595 That just ain't you or me, huh? 340 00:18:35,596 --> 00:18:36,680 Escort to infirmary. 341 00:18:36,681 --> 00:18:38,973 Escort to infirmary. 342 00:18:38,974 --> 00:18:41,643 We need the right Oompa Loompa to smuggle our sweets out of here. 343 00:18:41,644 --> 00:18:45,265 You know what? Now you're just abusing the metaphor. 344 00:18:45,981 --> 00:18:47,732 This is the last of it... 345 00:18:47,733 --> 00:18:50,819 and if you ask me, this oatmeal should be for breakfast, not voodoo. 346 00:18:50,820 --> 00:18:52,196 It's not abracadabra. 347 00:18:52,197 --> 00:18:54,864 It's nature's anti-itch cream. It's medicine. 348 00:18:54,865 --> 00:18:57,367 So why you making it and not the infirmary? 349 00:18:57,368 --> 00:18:59,028 Good fucking question. Dame. 350 00:19:03,708 --> 00:19:05,618 Fuck. 351 00:19:10,131 --> 00:19:12,591 Inmate, there've been complaints about moldy rice. 352 00:19:12,592 --> 00:19:14,392 I need you to show me where you store it. 353 00:19:22,685 --> 00:19:25,145 The fuck is this? An intervention? 354 00:19:25,146 --> 00:19:27,564 What were you doing talking to Mendez's mother? 355 00:19:27,565 --> 00:19:29,858 We're mutually-concerned grandparents. 356 00:19:29,859 --> 00:19:31,485 She's not the grandmother. 357 00:19:31,486 --> 00:19:32,986 - She might be. - What is that supposed to mean? 358 00:19:32,987 --> 00:19:35,114 That's for me and my daughter to talk about. 359 00:19:35,115 --> 00:19:36,781 - He's part of this. - Yeah, I am. 360 00:19:36,782 --> 00:19:38,025 Yeah? 361 00:19:39,452 --> 00:19:41,404 Okay, fine. 362 00:19:43,164 --> 00:19:45,082 - She wants to adopt the baby. - What? 363 00:19:45,083 --> 00:19:46,326 Shh! 364 00:19:47,127 --> 00:19:49,086 - Your job right now is to listen. - To what? 365 00:19:49,087 --> 00:19:51,255 The only thing worse than Mendez raising that baby 366 00:19:51,256 --> 00:19:53,090 - is his mother doing it. - Mmm-hmm. 367 00:19:53,091 --> 00:19:56,843 That's what I said... but it turns out she got two other kids. 368 00:19:56,844 --> 00:19:58,970 One's a tooth doctor, the other's an artist, 369 00:19:58,971 --> 00:20:00,180 and they turned out real good. 370 00:20:00,181 --> 00:20:03,642 - I'm not giving up my baby to nobody. - That's also what I said... 371 00:20:03,643 --> 00:20:05,810 but then she made some real good points. 372 00:20:05,811 --> 00:20:07,229 - No, nothing she... - Shh! 373 00:20:09,690 --> 00:20:14,111 Daya... you got 37 months left on your sentence. 374 00:20:14,112 --> 00:20:16,238 He can't do nothing or he'll go to jail, too. 375 00:20:16,239 --> 00:20:20,568 Abuela is too old and Cesar's guaranteed to fuck up. 376 00:20:21,994 --> 00:20:25,197 You remember your year in foster care? 377 00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:27,207 You want that for the baby? 378 00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:30,244 - That's not going to happen. - Shh! Let her finish. 379 00:20:31,879 --> 00:20:33,755 You're not actually considering this, are you? 380 00:20:33,756 --> 00:20:35,132 Aren't you? 381 00:20:35,133 --> 00:20:38,760 I'm not saying yes. It just kind of makes sense. 382 00:20:38,761 --> 00:20:40,345 Except for the part where the woman 383 00:20:40,346 --> 00:20:44,474 who raised a drug-dealing rapist named Pornstache adopts our child. 384 00:20:45,643 --> 00:20:47,852 Have you ever even held a baby? 385 00:20:47,853 --> 00:20:49,221 Changed a diaper? 386 00:20:49,939 --> 00:20:53,733 You wanna make that kid live in a shithole with five other people? 387 00:20:53,734 --> 00:20:55,895 He can have his own bedroom. 388 00:20:57,738 --> 00:21:01,741 Did you ever spend the night in a room by yourself? 389 00:21:01,742 --> 00:21:04,453 That baby could have a real life... 390 00:21:04,454 --> 00:21:06,496 with money... 391 00:21:06,497 --> 00:21:09,583 and clean towels and shit. 392 00:21:09,584 --> 00:21:13,253 Look, Daya and I are happy, okay? 393 00:21:13,254 --> 00:21:15,748 You don't need towels for that. 394 00:21:19,385 --> 00:21:20,795 Right? 395 00:21:56,589 --> 00:21:59,007 God damn it, Farzad! 396 00:21:59,008 --> 00:22:01,885 Look, it's only funny because the dudes are dancing. 397 00:22:01,886 --> 00:22:04,429 Not her. Understand? 398 00:22:04,430 --> 00:22:05,923 No. 399 00:22:07,182 --> 00:22:08,517 Jesus. 400 00:22:08,518 --> 00:22:11,561 Can somebody please get me a better Muslim over here? 401 00:22:11,562 --> 00:22:15,099 Let's try this again in five, ladies. 402 00:22:25,242 --> 00:22:26,576 Don't sweat it, man. 403 00:22:26,577 --> 00:22:28,654 This is just how Americans like to waste time. 404 00:22:30,247 --> 00:22:31,998 Bad work? 405 00:22:31,999 --> 00:22:33,958 You were bad at being stupid. 406 00:22:33,959 --> 00:22:35,578 That is a good thing. 407 00:22:37,129 --> 00:22:39,456 You did good. You did good. 408 00:22:43,386 --> 00:22:45,713 What's wrong with them? 409 00:22:46,889 --> 00:22:48,298 Them, uh... 410 00:22:49,767 --> 00:22:53,053 You all, uh... boy-kiss-boy. 411 00:22:54,063 --> 00:22:55,556 Fuck! This motherfucker... 412 00:22:56,816 --> 00:22:58,483 Yeah, I see that. 413 00:22:58,484 --> 00:23:01,486 Ugh, it's like ironic divine retribution. 414 00:23:01,487 --> 00:23:03,905 We're stuck in our own spin cycle. 415 00:23:03,906 --> 00:23:07,659 This paper suit keeps sticking to my sweaty parts. 416 00:23:07,660 --> 00:23:11,287 Once, when my mother forgot to buy me a Halloween costume, 417 00:23:11,288 --> 00:23:13,332 she taped a bunch of old newspapers to me 418 00:23:13,333 --> 00:23:15,334 and said I should tell people I was a newsstand. 419 00:23:15,335 --> 00:23:17,537 You know what we need? 420 00:23:18,379 --> 00:23:20,296 Bean leaves. 421 00:23:20,297 --> 00:23:23,091 I got bedbugs at a sit-in for a Portland homeless shelter. 422 00:23:23,092 --> 00:23:24,468 The conditions were appalling. 423 00:23:24,469 --> 00:23:27,379 So we used bean leaves to trap the bedbugs and get rid of them. 424 00:23:28,097 --> 00:23:29,799 I didn't know beans grew on leaves. 425 00:23:30,683 --> 00:23:32,266 Oh, yeah, take it off. 426 00:23:32,267 --> 00:23:36,270 Ooh! Excuse me, Mr. Luschek. 427 00:23:36,271 --> 00:23:39,566 We would like to make a formal petition for some bean leaves. 428 00:23:39,567 --> 00:23:41,776 And maybe some extra washers. 429 00:23:41,777 --> 00:23:43,445 People or machines, either one. 430 00:23:43,446 --> 00:23:45,530 But really, bean leaves. 431 00:23:45,531 --> 00:23:49,576 If you say "bean leaves" one more time, I'm going to punch you in the fuck hole. 432 00:23:49,577 --> 00:23:50,986 One of the fuck holes. 433 00:23:52,121 --> 00:23:54,623 How 'bout some fans instead? 434 00:23:54,624 --> 00:23:56,325 At least two of them work. 435 00:23:58,252 --> 00:23:59,335 All yours. 436 00:23:59,336 --> 00:24:01,045 Aye, aye, Captain. 437 00:24:01,046 --> 00:24:03,798 Yeah, I wouldn't want to see you strain your ass, 438 00:24:03,799 --> 00:24:05,509 you know, sitting on that table. 439 00:24:05,510 --> 00:24:08,344 I could probably think of a witty comeback if it wasn't so hot in here... 440 00:24:08,345 --> 00:24:10,013 or I cared. 441 00:24:10,014 --> 00:24:14,100 Hey, I hope you're not down here for any of that girl faggot shit. 442 00:24:14,101 --> 00:24:16,686 Well, when you talk dirty to me like that... 443 00:24:16,687 --> 00:24:19,355 Yeah, I know you've been sniffing around Angie's tree. 444 00:24:19,356 --> 00:24:20,440 And you should know 445 00:24:20,441 --> 00:24:23,402 the only soggy box that interests me is mine, 446 00:24:23,403 --> 00:24:28,532 and all that goes in it are dicks and tampons... 447 00:24:28,533 --> 00:24:31,660 and sometimes other things, but only guys can put those in. 448 00:24:31,661 --> 00:24:32,869 Noted. 449 00:24:32,870 --> 00:24:35,497 Although, when you call it your soggy box, 450 00:24:35,498 --> 00:24:37,874 you know, it makes it really hard to resist. 451 00:24:37,875 --> 00:24:41,795 Hey, how come all the guards get to wear real clothes? 452 00:24:41,796 --> 00:24:42,921 We're exempt. 453 00:24:42,922 --> 00:24:44,589 Do the bedbugs know that? 454 00:24:44,590 --> 00:24:46,425 You wash our uniforms every day. 455 00:24:49,512 --> 00:24:51,005 Shit! 456 00:25:00,355 --> 00:25:03,100 Whoa! Whoa! Luschek! 457 00:25:03,818 --> 00:25:05,618 It's like undressing in front of my dog. 458 00:25:06,195 --> 00:25:09,439 I need you to wash these right now. 459 00:25:10,157 --> 00:25:12,026 Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! 460 00:25:19,625 --> 00:25:22,286 Sleepy-time tea. 461 00:25:30,678 --> 00:25:33,387 ♪ A little spray here A little spray there ♪ 462 00:25:33,388 --> 00:25:36,015 ♪ Ooh, little spray in my underwear ♪ 463 00:25:36,016 --> 00:25:38,392 ♪ Makes the buggies back off ♪ 464 00:25:38,393 --> 00:25:41,437 ♪ Ooh, makes the buggies piss off ♪ 465 00:25:41,438 --> 00:25:44,190 ♪ Makes the buggies back way the fuck Tssh! Tssh! ♪ 466 00:25:44,191 --> 00:25:45,900 ♪ Way the fuck off ♪ 467 00:25:47,570 --> 00:25:50,947 This is, like, the Titanic of bad ideas. 468 00:25:50,948 --> 00:25:52,949 Like, we're steerin' out the way of bedbugs 469 00:25:52,950 --> 00:25:56,452 and crashin' into an iceberg of chemical burns and shit. 470 00:25:56,453 --> 00:25:59,990 Please. My Grammy used to douche with disinfectant. 471 00:26:00,708 --> 00:26:03,126 - The trick is to imagine the bugs... - Lybol? 472 00:26:03,127 --> 00:26:04,377 ...being bugged by you. 473 00:26:04,378 --> 00:26:07,506 You can't give away your power. 474 00:26:07,507 --> 00:26:09,674 Like you almost did at lunch? 475 00:26:09,675 --> 00:26:13,720 Look, you can't be getting' all crazy every time that somebody talks about Vee. 476 00:26:13,721 --> 00:26:15,972 But did you hear that slattern? 477 00:26:15,973 --> 00:26:18,892 Look, that business about a tri-penis, unacceptable. 478 00:26:18,893 --> 00:26:24,188 That warrants... a severe response. 479 00:26:24,189 --> 00:26:27,358 Man, you fuck up an ofay with a spork, you angry enough. 480 00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,529 No, Vee would have defended me if vice were versa. 481 00:26:30,530 --> 00:26:33,948 Okay, even if that was true, which it definitely is not, 482 00:26:33,949 --> 00:26:38,578 you're one shot away from being a puddle of black drool in the psych. 483 00:26:38,579 --> 00:26:40,830 You need to check yourself. 484 00:26:40,831 --> 00:26:42,248 - Back off. - Did you mean... 485 00:26:42,249 --> 00:26:44,626 ...to spray that on your skin? 486 00:26:44,627 --> 00:26:45,835 Yes. 487 00:26:45,836 --> 00:26:50,131 Because in general, when a bottle reads "caution" and "warning," 488 00:26:50,132 --> 00:26:53,176 it might not be the best idea. 489 00:26:53,177 --> 00:26:54,969 Man, see? 490 00:26:54,970 --> 00:26:56,680 I knew this was a bad idea, 491 00:26:56,681 --> 00:27:00,474 you telling me to clean with your grandma's douche. 492 00:27:00,475 --> 00:27:03,227 Someone's grandma douches with disinfectant? 493 00:27:03,228 --> 00:27:06,314 Man, this was the pill before there was a pill. 494 00:27:06,315 --> 00:27:07,899 It's cheaper than condoms 495 00:27:07,900 --> 00:27:10,652 and make your coochie crack smell like lemon fresh. 496 00:27:10,653 --> 00:27:12,821 I'm for real. Look that shit up. 497 00:27:12,822 --> 00:27:17,366 It couldn't have worked too well because, you know, well, you're here. 498 00:27:17,367 --> 00:27:18,660 Man, uh... 499 00:27:18,661 --> 00:27:21,120 When did our bathroom become gentrified? 500 00:27:21,121 --> 00:27:24,666 Since the Spanish became patient zero for bedbugs. 501 00:27:24,667 --> 00:27:25,959 Mmm. 502 00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:28,002 This isn't social hour, ladies. 503 00:27:28,003 --> 00:27:30,831 Unless you're working, out. Everybody out. 504 00:27:32,842 --> 00:27:34,634 I gave you an order, inmate. 505 00:27:34,635 --> 00:27:37,053 I... 506 00:27:37,054 --> 00:27:40,549 I need permission to use the toilet? 507 00:27:41,433 --> 00:27:44,102 - May I relieve myself, teacher? - Excuse me? 508 00:27:44,103 --> 00:27:45,394 - Alex... - That's a shot. 509 00:27:45,395 --> 00:27:46,980 What? 510 00:27:46,981 --> 00:27:49,482 There are girls spraying themselves with disinfectant 511 00:27:49,483 --> 00:27:51,735 because this prison is swarming with bugs, 512 00:27:51,736 --> 00:27:54,070 but pissing is a violation? 513 00:27:54,071 --> 00:27:56,740 Great. I'm glad you have your priorities straight. 514 00:27:56,741 --> 00:27:59,325 - Where are the fucking fumigators? - Lower your voice, inmate. 515 00:27:59,326 --> 00:28:02,453 Are they too worried to kill the bedbugs because they'll kill the cockroaches, too? 516 00:28:02,454 --> 00:28:04,454 - Are you calling me a cockroach? - It's okay. 517 00:28:04,790 --> 00:28:06,249 They get a bad rap. 518 00:28:06,250 --> 00:28:07,458 Alex. 519 00:28:07,459 --> 00:28:08,877 You're going to seg, inmate. 520 00:28:08,878 --> 00:28:10,670 Alex! No, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 521 00:28:10,671 --> 00:28:11,755 You know that this isn't her. 522 00:28:11,756 --> 00:28:13,840 She's just back here after having been out. 523 00:28:13,841 --> 00:28:17,636 - You want a shot, too, Chapman? - Will it keep her out of SHU? 524 00:28:17,637 --> 00:28:19,839 Please. Come on. 525 00:28:20,723 --> 00:28:23,141 Hey, haven't you ever had a bad day? 526 00:28:23,142 --> 00:28:28,305 Like, a... really... really bad day? 527 00:28:31,150 --> 00:28:35,654 Disobeying a staff member, insolence to a staff member. 528 00:28:35,655 --> 00:28:37,815 That's two shots, Vause. 529 00:28:45,539 --> 00:28:46,866 Alex. 530 00:28:47,875 --> 00:28:50,119 How am I back here, Piper? 531 00:28:53,130 --> 00:28:57,209 How could I let myself get back here? 532 00:29:01,180 --> 00:29:04,466 Alex, it's not your fault. 533 00:29:05,643 --> 00:29:07,719 And they call me crazy. 534 00:29:38,550 --> 00:29:39,633 Oh, my God! 535 00:29:39,634 --> 00:29:42,296 We will probably never be rich... 536 00:29:43,138 --> 00:29:45,514 and we'll most likely live in a place that's not that big, 537 00:29:45,515 --> 00:29:48,760 but we'll work hard and we'll love each other and... 538 00:29:49,561 --> 00:29:52,856 we'll find so much happiness that we won't even know what to do with it. 539 00:29:52,857 --> 00:29:55,108 We'll share it with our kid. 540 00:29:55,109 --> 00:29:57,151 Our kids. 541 00:30:01,115 --> 00:30:03,275 Will you marry me? 542 00:30:06,912 --> 00:30:09,406 The ring is temporary. 543 00:30:11,792 --> 00:30:14,411 - Uh... my leg. - Okay. 544 00:30:24,221 --> 00:30:26,639 I love you so much. 545 00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:28,725 We still gotta be careful... 546 00:30:28,726 --> 00:30:30,594 for now. 547 00:30:36,942 --> 00:30:40,820 Hey, you know, I think you need to be in an enclosed space for that to work. 548 00:30:41,947 --> 00:30:44,698 I'm blasting the heater to kill any bedbugs inside. 549 00:30:44,699 --> 00:30:47,611 Hey, Luschek, let me ask you a question. 550 00:30:48,913 --> 00:30:50,614 You like candy, right? 551 00:30:51,415 --> 00:30:53,041 Body by Butterfinger. 552 00:30:53,042 --> 00:30:55,084 I'm speaking allegorically here. 553 00:30:55,085 --> 00:30:56,745 You wanna talk about Al Gore? 554 00:30:57,462 --> 00:30:59,088 Oh, Jesus. 555 00:30:59,089 --> 00:31:03,092 Okay. Hey, listen, all right? Focus. 556 00:31:03,093 --> 00:31:08,097 Let's say I happen to have a Costco-sized box of candy, right? 557 00:31:08,098 --> 00:31:12,226 And I... I fuckin' love candy, but I can't eat it anymore 558 00:31:12,227 --> 00:31:15,438 because, you know, it ruined my life, it gave me cavities, 559 00:31:15,439 --> 00:31:17,941 I am in Candy Eaters Anonymous now, eh? 560 00:31:17,942 --> 00:31:21,402 So I gotta get rid of it, yeah? 561 00:31:21,403 --> 00:31:24,064 Like, out-of-the-prison rid of it. 562 00:31:29,078 --> 00:31:31,571 I've got a shit-ton of heroin I need you to sell. 563 00:31:32,706 --> 00:31:36,918 - Are you out of your mind, inmate? - Hey. 564 00:31:36,919 --> 00:31:38,544 You're asking me to sell narcotics? 565 00:31:38,545 --> 00:31:41,040 I'm a Federal Corrections Officer. 566 00:31:41,756 --> 00:31:43,382 All right, let's go. 567 00:31:43,383 --> 00:31:45,593 - We're gonna go to Caputo's office... - No! 568 00:31:45,594 --> 00:31:48,262 ...you're gonna tell him exactly what you told me, 569 00:31:48,263 --> 00:31:50,098 every word, even that weird Al Gore thing. 570 00:31:50,099 --> 00:31:52,433 Okay, look, Luschek, you must've misunderstood me, all right? 571 00:31:53,768 --> 00:31:55,554 I'm fucking with you. 572 00:31:56,897 --> 00:31:57,981 Of course I'll sell it. 573 00:31:57,982 --> 00:32:01,067 Oh, my God. Jesus. 574 00:32:01,068 --> 00:32:03,777 Man, come on. You know I got a bad heart. 575 00:32:03,778 --> 00:32:05,738 You can't do that shit to me, man. 576 00:32:05,739 --> 00:32:08,241 I want, uh... 80%. 577 00:32:08,242 --> 00:32:09,734 Of the drugs or the money? 578 00:32:14,581 --> 00:32:16,499 You're not supposed to be back here. 579 00:32:16,500 --> 00:32:18,709 Yeah, I know, but I got this. 580 00:32:18,710 --> 00:32:20,003 - You slept with it? - Yeah. 581 00:32:20,004 --> 00:32:21,295 - Said the Lord's Prayer? - Mmm-hmm. 582 00:32:21,296 --> 00:32:23,797 Okay, good. Evil eye is off of you. 583 00:32:23,798 --> 00:32:25,834 Don't you gotta break it or some shit? 584 00:32:26,801 --> 00:32:28,052 I'll break it in the morning when I cook it. 585 00:32:28,053 --> 00:32:29,137 What? 586 00:32:29,138 --> 00:32:31,931 But you can't feed somebody my problems! What... what if I eat it back? 587 00:32:31,932 --> 00:32:33,016 You as likely to eat 588 00:32:33,017 --> 00:32:35,309 somebody's hormone imbalance, cheating husband or diarrhea. 589 00:32:35,310 --> 00:32:36,560 Listen... 590 00:32:36,561 --> 00:32:38,441 ...if it makes you nervous, skip breakfast. 591 00:32:39,148 --> 00:32:42,191 That ain't right, yo. I'm trying here. 592 00:32:42,192 --> 00:32:44,777 Well, I had to use all the oatmeal on people's itches 593 00:32:44,778 --> 00:32:46,487 which means that more people are eating eggs 594 00:32:46,488 --> 00:32:49,358 which means that your egg... gets cooked. 595 00:33:05,090 --> 00:33:06,291 Thanks. 596 00:33:11,346 --> 00:33:14,091 I'm literally garbage. 597 00:33:15,475 --> 00:33:18,394 I think I'm having a nervous breakdown. 598 00:33:18,395 --> 00:33:20,313 Oh, chin up, kibun. 599 00:33:20,314 --> 00:33:22,766 You'll think of the right lie. 600 00:33:24,526 --> 00:33:25,894 What was that about? 601 00:33:26,403 --> 00:33:29,447 I told her that her restaurant was a booming success. 602 00:33:29,448 --> 00:33:30,531 And? 603 00:33:30,532 --> 00:33:32,825 And it has been shuttered for months. 604 00:33:32,826 --> 00:33:34,118 Mmm. 605 00:33:34,119 --> 00:33:35,203 That's fucked up. 606 00:33:35,204 --> 00:33:36,996 I was trying to be nice. 607 00:33:36,997 --> 00:33:39,582 She was so happy when I lied. 608 00:33:39,583 --> 00:33:41,500 Delusion can be very comforting. 609 00:33:41,501 --> 00:33:43,120 Right? 610 00:33:44,046 --> 00:33:46,547 The best part of my time here 611 00:33:46,548 --> 00:33:50,927 was when I thought somebody else had named me as a co-conspirator. 612 00:33:50,928 --> 00:33:53,804 It was like... 613 00:33:53,805 --> 00:33:57,976 the universe had just brought us back together. 614 00:33:57,977 --> 00:34:01,020 And then you realized that I was the asshole who named you. 615 00:34:01,021 --> 00:34:02,981 No. 616 00:34:02,982 --> 00:34:06,609 I mean, yes, you did and that sucked... 617 00:34:06,610 --> 00:34:07,977 but... 618 00:34:10,447 --> 00:34:14,609 for a while, ignorance was... bliss. 619 00:34:21,041 --> 00:34:23,542 Getting all of our shit out on the table, 620 00:34:23,543 --> 00:34:27,713 being totally, brutally honest about all the fucked-up things we've done, 621 00:34:27,714 --> 00:34:30,383 and then deciding to still like each other, 622 00:34:30,384 --> 00:34:32,877 that is an amazing thing. 623 00:34:34,138 --> 00:34:37,632 Resiliency of the human spirit and all of that. 624 00:34:39,143 --> 00:34:41,595 So much better than ignorance. 625 00:34:43,897 --> 00:34:45,432 Seriously. 626 00:34:47,692 --> 00:34:49,311 What? 627 00:34:50,904 --> 00:34:52,606 What is it, Piper? 628 00:34:54,616 --> 00:34:57,118 I, um... 629 00:34:57,119 --> 00:34:59,828 had a friend... 630 00:34:59,829 --> 00:35:02,331 call... 631 00:35:02,332 --> 00:35:03,749 Davy Crockett 632 00:35:03,750 --> 00:35:07,496 and tell him that you had violated your parole. 633 00:35:10,299 --> 00:35:12,751 You called... 634 00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:17,346 my probation officer? 635 00:35:17,347 --> 00:35:19,223 You kept saying that you were in danger. 636 00:35:19,224 --> 00:35:20,766 - Bullshit. - And I was just trying to protect you. 637 00:35:20,767 --> 00:35:22,351 That is bullshit and you know it. 638 00:35:22,352 --> 00:35:24,062 Just more bullshit! 639 00:35:24,063 --> 00:35:27,981 I'm so, so, so, so sorry... 640 00:35:27,982 --> 00:35:33,779 but now, see, all of our shit... is just right out on the table 641 00:35:33,780 --> 00:35:35,198 and we can decide to like each other... 642 00:35:35,199 --> 00:35:37,783 You're a fucking psycho! 643 00:35:37,784 --> 00:35:40,494 ...and you can stop blaming yourself for being in here. 644 00:35:40,495 --> 00:35:42,746 And start blaming you? 645 00:35:42,747 --> 00:35:44,957 Because that's what I'm supposed to do now, right? 646 00:35:44,958 --> 00:35:48,794 So you can keep control over whatever this is. 647 00:35:48,795 --> 00:35:52,090 Control? Alex, you were having a nervous breakdown. 648 00:35:52,091 --> 00:35:53,958 Which wasn't hot for you, was it? 649 00:35:56,178 --> 00:35:58,721 Depressives are bummer fuck-buddies. 650 00:35:58,722 --> 00:36:00,965 Can't have that. 651 00:36:04,436 --> 00:36:08,807 God, you're such a manipulative cunt! 652 00:36:15,572 --> 00:36:18,024 You're gonna have to burn 'em. 653 00:36:19,451 --> 00:36:22,745 We're not burning any books. This is not Nuremberg. 654 00:36:22,746 --> 00:36:26,874 And I'm not that kind of exterminator, but facts is facts. 655 00:36:26,875 --> 00:36:29,168 Am I allowed to interact with them? 656 00:36:29,169 --> 00:36:31,504 They are people. Yeah. 657 00:36:31,505 --> 00:36:33,623 Can I see a couple of those? 658 00:36:35,049 --> 00:36:38,302 Yeah, that's Rats of NIMH. It's, like, my top five. 659 00:36:38,303 --> 00:36:40,763 I cried like a baby when Jenner died. You can't burn that. 660 00:36:40,764 --> 00:36:43,516 Man, this broke-ass prison will never replace 'em. 661 00:36:43,517 --> 00:36:45,518 - You can't do this. - Calm down. 662 00:36:45,519 --> 00:36:48,061 We're not replacing any books 'cause we're not losing any. 663 00:36:48,062 --> 00:36:50,223 Isn't that right, Dan? 664 00:36:51,150 --> 00:36:52,733 - Bedbug. - What? 665 00:36:52,734 --> 00:36:55,236 Man, that ain't no bedbug. 666 00:36:55,237 --> 00:36:56,904 That's a muffin crumb. 667 00:36:56,905 --> 00:36:58,906 Well, how you gonna tell the expert what that is? 668 00:36:58,907 --> 00:37:01,242 Ain't like I'm not an expert at muffins. 669 00:37:01,243 --> 00:37:03,076 The thing about these bastards is once they're in, 670 00:37:03,077 --> 00:37:05,913 the only way to get 'em out is to wipe out their nooks and crannies. 671 00:37:05,914 --> 00:37:07,796 You can't just spray some stuff in here? 672 00:37:07,797 --> 00:37:08,916 Steam the books or something? 673 00:37:08,917 --> 00:37:11,160 I'm telling you, it ain't a bedbug. 674 00:37:11,878 --> 00:37:13,663 What you think, Mr. Caputo? 675 00:37:19,594 --> 00:37:21,053 You're 100% sure? 676 00:37:21,054 --> 00:37:22,263 75%. 677 00:37:22,264 --> 00:37:24,307 How sure are you that that's a muffin crumb? 678 00:37:24,308 --> 00:37:26,309 - Like, 90%. - Oh? 679 00:37:26,310 --> 00:37:27,844 Well, that wins out. 680 00:37:30,189 --> 00:37:31,314 You wanna be sure? 681 00:37:31,315 --> 00:37:33,149 Have at it. 682 00:37:35,860 --> 00:37:37,437 - Jefferson... - T... 683 00:37:39,614 --> 00:37:41,190 You didn't! Jesus. 684 00:37:41,991 --> 00:37:45,111 I'm down to, like, 50-50. 685 00:37:46,455 --> 00:37:48,072 Shit. 686 00:37:50,417 --> 00:37:51,951 Who are you? 687 00:37:52,586 --> 00:37:56,247 Uh, sorry, I'm looking for Cesar. 688 00:37:57,841 --> 00:37:59,217 - Cesar! - What? 689 00:37:59,218 --> 00:38:00,710 Some white boy here. 690 00:38:03,680 --> 00:38:04,923 Baby daddy! 691 00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:08,058 Que pasó? Daya and Aleida okay? 692 00:38:08,059 --> 00:38:11,187 Yeah. Yeah, no, great. I, um... 693 00:38:11,188 --> 00:38:14,565 You said to stop by sometime, so here I am. 694 00:38:14,566 --> 00:38:18,902 Also, I brought this gift for Lucy. 695 00:38:18,903 --> 00:38:22,906 And, uh... I proposed to Daya, actually. 696 00:38:22,907 --> 00:38:24,408 No fucking way! 697 00:38:24,409 --> 00:38:26,118 Get in here! 698 00:38:26,119 --> 00:38:29,079 Homeboy stepping up to the plate! 699 00:38:30,999 --> 00:38:33,041 Margarita, listen to this. 700 00:38:33,042 --> 00:38:36,003 How'd you do it? Did you get her a ring? 701 00:38:36,004 --> 00:38:39,590 Uh, I made it, actually, out of... gum wrappers. 702 00:38:39,591 --> 00:38:40,924 Gum was how we met, so... 703 00:38:40,925 --> 00:38:42,843 Babe. Babe! 704 00:38:42,844 --> 00:38:44,845 What's up? 705 00:38:44,846 --> 00:38:46,255 Dinner! 706 00:38:49,434 --> 00:38:51,352 Dude, you need to get her a real ring. 707 00:38:51,353 --> 00:38:53,812 Yeah, no, definitely. I just, um... 708 00:38:53,813 --> 00:38:55,273 I mean, she can't have it in prison, though, 709 00:38:55,274 --> 00:38:57,941 'cause she'll get, you know, shanked for it. 710 00:38:57,942 --> 00:39:00,819 My boss will ask me where she got it, or... 711 00:39:00,820 --> 00:39:04,273 But... I think the gum ring is fine for now. 712 00:39:06,075 --> 00:39:08,445 Hey, who's... who's that? 713 00:39:09,246 --> 00:39:12,281 I'm a daddy again! 714 00:39:13,250 --> 00:39:16,710 And I know you ain't gonna say shit to Aleida, right? 715 00:39:16,711 --> 00:39:21,382 Or do I have to bribe you with, like, movies and candies like I do with them? 716 00:39:23,385 --> 00:39:24,843 How many times... 717 00:39:24,844 --> 00:39:26,304 Look! Look what you did. 718 00:39:26,305 --> 00:39:27,839 You broke this shit! 719 00:39:30,267 --> 00:39:32,476 Hi. You're Lucy, right? 720 00:39:32,477 --> 00:39:34,178 I'm Lucy. 721 00:39:34,854 --> 00:39:37,516 Oh, sorry. 722 00:39:49,786 --> 00:39:52,288 Happy birthday! 723 00:39:52,289 --> 00:39:53,997 Dayanara asked me to bring you this. 724 00:39:53,998 --> 00:39:55,659 Is it a Barbie? 725 00:39:56,460 --> 00:39:59,337 Well, I guess you'll have to open it and find out. 726 00:39:59,338 --> 00:40:03,041 No, it's not a Barbie, but it's cool. 727 00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:05,718 Dinner, bitches. 728 00:40:05,719 --> 00:40:06,885 That was fast. 729 00:40:06,886 --> 00:40:09,763 Yeah, leftovers from Storky's. 730 00:40:09,764 --> 00:40:11,474 Hey, I should probably get going. 731 00:40:11,475 --> 00:40:14,468 I just wanted to drop off the thing and tell you the good news. 732 00:40:14,936 --> 00:40:18,056 Nice try, homeboy. You're staying for dinner. 733 00:40:25,864 --> 00:40:27,531 Oh, Mitch, good to see you. 734 00:40:27,532 --> 00:40:29,992 Wish it were under better circumstances. 735 00:40:29,993 --> 00:40:32,411 Yeah, well, could be worse. 736 00:40:32,412 --> 00:40:34,246 Fig could still be here. 737 00:40:34,247 --> 00:40:36,240 I really liked her. 738 00:40:38,377 --> 00:40:42,880 The early releases should have saved you enough money 739 00:40:42,881 --> 00:40:46,800 to handle the infestation situation without any additional funding. 740 00:40:46,801 --> 00:40:50,012 I've made several cost-cutting measures myself, 741 00:40:50,013 --> 00:40:51,764 and that includes the new mattresses 742 00:40:51,765 --> 00:40:53,974 which I noticed weren't factored into your budget. 743 00:40:53,975 --> 00:40:55,393 Because they weren't approved. 744 00:40:55,394 --> 00:40:57,353 They were approved. They have to be. 745 00:40:57,354 --> 00:40:59,187 We're burning 'em right now, Mitch. 746 00:40:59,188 --> 00:41:01,273 Burning, yes, fine. 747 00:41:01,274 --> 00:41:04,276 But we're not going to replace hundreds of mattresses 748 00:41:04,277 --> 00:41:06,730 only to get rid of them again in two months. 749 00:41:08,532 --> 00:41:11,317 Why would we get rid of the mattresses in two months? 750 00:41:14,996 --> 00:41:16,322 No one told you. 751 00:41:19,083 --> 00:41:21,035 Holy shit. 752 00:41:22,671 --> 00:41:25,749 Holy shit! 753 00:41:29,594 --> 00:41:32,304 That's the reason for the early releases. 754 00:41:32,305 --> 00:41:34,097 I'm sorry. 755 00:41:34,098 --> 00:41:35,933 I don't know how you weren't informed. 756 00:41:35,934 --> 00:41:40,179 The warden must've forgot to ring me in between rounds of golf. 757 00:41:41,940 --> 00:41:44,274 None of this reflects badly on you. 758 00:41:44,275 --> 00:41:48,737 Your name is actually being mentioned quite favorably. 759 00:41:48,738 --> 00:41:51,816 There's a good chance you'll get a transfer. 760 00:41:54,327 --> 00:41:55,820 And everybody else? 761 00:42:03,795 --> 00:42:05,496 How long do we have? 762 00:42:05,880 --> 00:42:08,750 The prisoners should all be relocated by the 20th. 763 00:42:10,009 --> 00:42:13,171 They're officially closing the prison the 30th. 764 00:42:23,898 --> 00:42:25,441 Eat your French fries, puto. 765 00:42:25,442 --> 00:42:27,568 I'm not hungry for vegetables. 766 00:42:27,569 --> 00:42:28,694 - Hey! - Oh! 767 00:42:28,695 --> 00:42:30,195 Pero listen to you. 768 00:42:30,196 --> 00:42:33,149 Don't you talk to him that way. He pays your rent. 769 00:42:33,950 --> 00:42:36,952 That's right. So you gotta listen to what I say 770 00:42:36,953 --> 00:42:41,582 because otherwise, there'll be behavioral consequences. 771 00:42:41,583 --> 00:42:44,209 Man, when you put 'em in the microwave, they get disgusting! 772 00:42:44,210 --> 00:42:45,536 I'm not eating 'em. 773 00:42:50,967 --> 00:42:53,218 Whoa! Hey, now! Hey! Whoa. 774 00:42:53,219 --> 00:42:55,596 Margarita brought you French fries. 775 00:42:55,597 --> 00:42:58,883 You better get fuckin' hungry real quick. 776 00:43:05,857 --> 00:43:07,399 Emiliano, do me a favor. 777 00:43:07,400 --> 00:43:10,144 Get the fuck out of my face. 778 00:43:15,575 --> 00:43:17,535 I know I look strict, right? 779 00:43:17,536 --> 00:43:19,620 But secretly, deep down inside, 780 00:43:19,621 --> 00:43:22,706 they're just happy that there's actually an adult in charge. 781 00:43:22,707 --> 00:43:25,659 Sit down, sit down. Eat, eat. 782 00:43:29,172 --> 00:43:31,256 Impact target 30 seconds from flash. 783 00:43:31,257 --> 00:43:35,135 Repeat. Impact target is 30 seconds from flash. 784 00:43:35,136 --> 00:43:37,971 Not a bad first combat tour, huh, Bennett? 785 00:43:37,972 --> 00:43:40,307 Yeah, cleaning porta-johns and dancing like a rent boy 786 00:43:40,308 --> 00:43:42,142 while Skynet does all the fun stuff. 787 00:43:42,143 --> 00:43:43,435 Aw, come on now. 788 00:43:43,436 --> 00:43:45,062 You know the biggest bombs in the whole war 789 00:43:45,063 --> 00:43:46,188 get dropped in the porta-johns. 790 00:43:46,189 --> 00:43:49,107 Ha-ha. Yeah, maybe I'll get a medal for most excellent shit-soldier. 791 00:43:49,108 --> 00:43:51,652 Lock it up. 792 00:43:51,653 --> 00:43:53,696 Eat your motherfucking ice cream... 793 00:43:53,697 --> 00:43:56,574 because we're about to deliver some serious freedom through their skulls. 794 00:43:56,575 --> 00:43:58,376 You have target confirmed. 795 00:43:58,535 --> 00:43:59,736 Go to fire. 796 00:44:01,788 --> 00:44:05,498 - Three, two, one. Kaboom. - Oh, shit! 797 00:44:06,876 --> 00:44:07,960 Fuck, yeah, bro! 798 00:44:07,961 --> 00:44:10,754 Bomb! Have bomb! Bomb! Them! 799 00:44:10,755 --> 00:44:12,206 No, no! It's not him! 800 00:44:16,344 --> 00:44:18,345 Grenade! 801 00:44:18,346 --> 00:44:19,547 Bennett, kick it out! 802 00:44:23,101 --> 00:44:24,727 Fuck! Clear out! 803 00:44:30,650 --> 00:44:32,476 Yeah, come in. 804 00:44:37,531 --> 00:44:40,492 I need to add my lawyer to my visitation list. 805 00:44:40,493 --> 00:44:42,578 You having problems with your case? 806 00:44:42,579 --> 00:44:44,246 No. 807 00:44:44,247 --> 00:44:47,533 And please take my husband off my list. 808 00:44:48,501 --> 00:44:50,210 Why don't you have a seat, Red? 809 00:44:50,211 --> 00:44:53,380 I won't be staying, but thank you. 810 00:44:53,381 --> 00:44:56,000 Please... sit. 811 00:44:56,718 --> 00:44:58,761 The mail cart is going around. 812 00:44:58,762 --> 00:45:02,006 All letters are subject to inspection. 813 00:45:02,807 --> 00:45:04,474 You want to tell me what's going on? 814 00:45:04,475 --> 00:45:06,184 I married a pillow. 815 00:45:06,185 --> 00:45:10,856 Soft, lumpy, and always lying behind my back. 816 00:45:10,857 --> 00:45:14,609 Words like "always" are absolutes... 817 00:45:14,610 --> 00:45:19,690 and using them is a way to reinforce what we wanna believe. 818 00:45:22,118 --> 00:45:24,445 When speaking emotionally... 819 00:45:25,496 --> 00:45:27,790 absolutes can be dangerous. 820 00:45:27,791 --> 00:45:29,958 Good advice. Thank you. 821 00:45:29,959 --> 00:45:33,662 Please add my lawyer and remove my husband. 822 00:45:34,463 --> 00:45:38,425 You know, Red... marriage is a two-way street. 823 00:45:38,426 --> 00:45:43,882 And you can't swim without getting wet. See? I can say clichés, too. Ha! 824 00:45:46,309 --> 00:45:49,102 You owe it to your younger self to explore 825 00:45:49,103 --> 00:45:52,690 those things that made you wanna marry this man in the first place. 826 00:45:52,691 --> 00:45:54,441 You may find that they're still there. 827 00:45:54,442 --> 00:45:59,654 I owe my younger self 23 years of wild sex with multiple partners, 828 00:45:59,655 --> 00:46:01,824 but I'll settle for my name back. 829 00:46:01,825 --> 00:46:05,160 You made a lifelong commitment. 830 00:46:05,161 --> 00:46:06,661 That's sacred. 831 00:46:06,662 --> 00:46:10,582 You don't know my story, Healy, and you don't know what he's done. 832 00:46:10,583 --> 00:46:11,666 _ 833 00:46:11,667 --> 00:46:14,336 Hey! Language! 834 00:46:14,337 --> 00:46:15,545 I know what that word means, 835 00:46:15,546 --> 00:46:19,083 and it's not okay to refer to your husband or any other man that way. 836 00:46:19,801 --> 00:46:24,637 You know, you huff in here... like some put-upon martyr... 837 00:46:24,638 --> 00:46:29,101 like a smile would break your face, trivializing a man's emotions. 838 00:46:29,102 --> 00:46:31,186 What is that? Some kind of a Russian thing or something? 839 00:46:31,187 --> 00:46:35,308 - What the hell does that... - Hey! Language! Again! 840 00:46:35,817 --> 00:46:39,562 That's the last time that I'm gonna warn you, Mrs. Reznikov. 841 00:46:40,363 --> 00:46:42,405 You forget where you are... 842 00:46:42,406 --> 00:46:46,493 just like you forget that your husband has a stake in this, too. 843 00:46:46,494 --> 00:46:48,120 Just because he made some mistakes 844 00:46:48,121 --> 00:46:50,873 doesn't mean that you can run off and go sleep in your mother's room 845 00:46:50,874 --> 00:46:53,416 at the first sign of white caps on the ocean. 846 00:47:28,244 --> 00:47:31,246 - You know, this is a bad fuckin' plan. - It's a great fuckin' plan. 847 00:47:31,247 --> 00:47:32,956 Drugs in the tool belt, tool belt to Luschek, 848 00:47:32,957 --> 00:47:35,208 Luschek to the streets, money. Don't overthink it. 849 00:47:35,209 --> 00:47:37,585 You know, I missed the part where you contribute. 850 00:47:37,586 --> 00:47:40,755 I am the fairy godmother who watches over you 851 00:47:40,756 --> 00:47:43,550 to make sure that the plan doesn't go up your cute little nose. 852 00:47:43,551 --> 00:47:47,095 Great. Finally I get a mother who gives a shit about me 853 00:47:47,096 --> 00:47:50,557 and... it's bibbity-bobbity Big Boo. 854 00:47:55,271 --> 00:47:57,230 - Uh, Boo? - Huh? 855 00:47:57,231 --> 00:47:58,474 We've got a problem. 856 00:48:04,113 --> 00:48:05,780 Someone stole our candy. 857 00:48:05,781 --> 00:48:07,657 Oh! 858 00:48:07,658 --> 00:48:08,859 Fuck! 859 00:48:22,590 --> 00:48:25,959 All right, that's the last of the E-Dorm mattresses, Mr. Caputo. 860 00:48:26,677 --> 00:48:28,971 No books. We're gonna try to salvage those. 861 00:48:28,972 --> 00:48:30,298 Are you kidding me? 862 00:48:31,724 --> 00:48:34,009 - Doesn't matter. - What's that? 863 00:48:36,729 --> 00:48:38,806 Doesn't matter. 864 00:48:43,903 --> 00:48:45,604 So, I'm confused. 865 00:48:58,334 --> 00:49:00,835 They're from that bush in the yard by the greenhouse. 866 00:49:00,836 --> 00:49:01,920 They're not bean leaves, 867 00:49:01,921 --> 00:49:05,757 but they have, like, pods on them, so I thought maybe they... 868 00:49:05,758 --> 00:49:07,175 Are you sleeping? 869 00:49:29,448 --> 00:49:32,910 You know... you can't actually feel the bites. 870 00:49:32,911 --> 00:49:37,990 Bedbug saliva contains a substance that acts as a mild anesthetic. 871 00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:40,458 It's in your head. 872 00:49:40,459 --> 00:49:42,920 I should sleep without a mattress more often. 873 00:49:42,921 --> 00:49:44,587 It's good for my back. 874 00:49:44,588 --> 00:49:48,341 If you feel like that's the right thing to do... 875 00:49:48,342 --> 00:49:51,420 then you should absolutely do it. 876 00:49:54,432 --> 00:49:58,302 Still trying to preserve my kibun? 877 00:50:00,813 --> 00:50:03,932 I told Alex the truth about something today... 878 00:50:04,442 --> 00:50:08,562 and she told me... that I was a manipulative... 879 00:50:13,826 --> 00:50:16,320 She told me I was manipulative. 880 00:50:18,581 --> 00:50:20,616 I lie... 881 00:50:22,251 --> 00:50:24,077 I get in trouble. 882 00:50:25,129 --> 00:50:26,580 I truth... 883 00:50:28,341 --> 00:50:30,168 I get in trouble. 884 00:50:33,262 --> 00:50:34,887 I can't do anything right. 885 00:50:34,888 --> 00:50:38,266 What are you asking for? Advice? 886 00:50:38,267 --> 00:50:39,809 Here's some. 887 00:50:39,810 --> 00:50:42,137 Stop buying into your own horseshit. 888 00:50:44,273 --> 00:50:46,941 You tell me I'm scratching is my imagination? 889 00:50:46,942 --> 00:50:50,112 Look around. The prison is crawling. 890 00:50:50,113 --> 00:50:53,156 You can tell everyone they can't feel it all night long, 891 00:50:53,157 --> 00:50:56,159 but in the morning, we've all been a bug buffet. 892 00:50:56,160 --> 00:50:59,204 Just... stop trying to mold the real world 893 00:50:59,205 --> 00:51:02,825 into the one inside your pointy blonde head. 894 00:51:09,382 --> 00:51:11,966 Maybe I am manipulative. 895 00:51:11,967 --> 00:51:15,504 From what I've seen... to get what you want... 896 00:51:16,805 --> 00:51:19,307 while telling everyone how clean you are... 897 00:51:19,308 --> 00:51:21,093 you play dirty. 898 00:51:21,810 --> 00:51:24,222 You just described my mother. 899 00:51:27,275 --> 00:51:30,193 She's a kibun ninja... 900 00:51:30,194 --> 00:51:33,863 or whatever the Korean version of "ninja" is... 901 00:51:33,864 --> 00:51:36,241 and then the WASP version of that. 902 00:51:36,242 --> 00:51:38,576 Awaken your inner Russian. 903 00:51:38,577 --> 00:51:40,120 No more bullshit. 904 00:51:40,121 --> 00:51:42,664 Na zdorovie. 905 00:51:42,665 --> 00:51:45,743 The world is better in black and white... 906 00:51:49,047 --> 00:51:50,498 and red. 907 00:51:53,426 --> 00:51:55,593 That's my favorite Daya story. 908 00:51:55,594 --> 00:51:56,678 What is it? 909 00:51:56,679 --> 00:51:59,681 What, you bang her and you don't know her quinceañera story? 910 00:51:59,682 --> 00:52:02,725 She tells that story to everybody. 911 00:52:02,726 --> 00:52:07,064 Aleida got wasted and she tripped and fell on the birthday cake 912 00:52:07,065 --> 00:52:09,191 and the candles lit her dress on fire... 913 00:52:09,192 --> 00:52:12,185 but you gotta hear the way Daya tells it. 914 00:52:13,946 --> 00:52:17,358 I ain't gonna lie, man. This shit... ain't easy. 915 00:52:18,951 --> 00:52:21,536 Yeah, I'm gonna have to go it alone for a while. 916 00:52:21,537 --> 00:52:25,540 Nah, nah, nah. You get yourself a little side of bacon... 917 00:52:25,541 --> 00:52:27,167 like Margarita. 918 00:52:27,168 --> 00:52:28,869 That's what women are made for. 919 00:52:31,172 --> 00:52:33,923 That used to be Daya's crib... 920 00:52:33,924 --> 00:52:36,843 and all the other little scrubs, too. 921 00:52:36,844 --> 00:52:39,971 It's nothing fancy, but, uh... 922 00:52:39,972 --> 00:52:41,973 it's got a lot of good luck. 923 00:52:41,974 --> 00:52:44,134 Buena suerte. 924 00:52:47,271 --> 00:52:50,357 I want you to have it, man. 925 00:52:50,358 --> 00:52:51,858 What about her? 926 00:52:51,859 --> 00:52:53,894 We'll get her something else. 927 00:52:55,196 --> 00:52:56,814 It's for Aleida's family. 928 00:52:57,615 --> 00:52:59,107 Salud! 929 00:53:07,082 --> 00:53:08,166 Margarita! 930 00:53:08,167 --> 00:53:10,001 Yeah? 931 00:53:17,176 --> 00:53:19,878 Six months old, but she shits like a human. 932 00:53:22,931 --> 00:53:24,516 Good morning, ladies. 933 00:53:24,517 --> 00:53:27,519 Additional linen uniforms are now available. 934 00:53:27,520 --> 00:53:32,850 If you are a small or an extra small, first come, first serve. 935 00:54:04,557 --> 00:54:06,258 You bitch! 936 00:54:07,268 --> 00:54:08,893 Fuck you, Alex! 937 00:54:08,894 --> 00:54:10,345 Fuck you! 938 00:55:37,956 --> 00:55:44,481 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com. 939 00:55:44,506 --> 00:55:47,506 Resync'd for SNEAkY by CookiesMonsta