1
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Ripped By mstoll
2
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- The big guns.
- Think they're so boss 'cause they wear suits.
3
00:01:17,695 --> 00:01:20,266
Stupid SIS. Why are they even here?
4
00:01:20,335 --> 00:01:24,704
Well, a stabbing and a slocking back to back-
It's turned into fuckin' Rikers around here.
5
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You know they're gonna grill the COs
as hard as the inmates.
6
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Those dicks are all dyin' to nail us.
7
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Gentlemen. Good morning.
8
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Welcome to Litchfield.
9
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Enjoy your stay.
10
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Kiss-ass.
11
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Gentlemen, nice to see you.
Uh, Captain Joe Caputo.
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- Morning.
- Morning.
13
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Uh, I thought we could meet in my office...
14
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and go over the details of the incident
before you begin your investigation.
15
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Uh, we report to Ms. Figueroa.
16
00:01:59,375 --> 00:02:01,855
Right. Well, I believe
I can provide more information.
17
00:02:01,975 --> 00:02:04,945
Ms. Figueroa wasn't on campus that evening.
18
00:02:05,015 --> 00:02:07,666
We have instructions
to meet with her exclusively.
19
00:02:07,735 --> 00:02:10,864
We'll interview you along with the other COs
when the time comes.
20
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Sure. Sure. I-I'll show you to her office.
21
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Some coffee would be great too.
22
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Light. Two sugars.
23
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I guess it could be worse.
24
00:02:24,415 --> 00:02:26,019
Back in the day...
25
00:02:26,095 --> 00:02:28,860
they would have us out
on some back road breaking rocks.
26
00:02:28,935 --> 00:02:33,497
Yeah. On the other hand,
Paulie in Goodfellas had the joint wired...
27
00:02:33,575 --> 00:02:35,577
cookin' big-ass dinners every night.
28
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Italians have weird shit with their mothers.
29
00:02:39,695 --> 00:02:42,016
They, like, live with them for way too long.
30
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We all got weird shit with our mamas.
31
00:02:46,695 --> 00:02:50,017
Hey. What you gonna say
when they ask you about Red?
32
00:02:50,095 --> 00:02:52,860
That I didn't see shit,
'cause I didn't see shit.
33
00:02:52,935 --> 00:02:55,506
- But come on. You know who did it.
- Mm-mmm.
34
00:02:55,575 --> 00:02:58,385
Oh, my gosh. Who? Who?
35
00:02:58,455 --> 00:02:59,980
Damn, you can't be doin' that shit.
36
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I got a family history of heart attacks.
37
00:03:01,735 --> 00:03:05,103
I'm sorry. I'm- I'm sorry. Huh?
38
00:03:05,175 --> 00:03:07,701
I just came to check on the family business.
39
00:03:07,775 --> 00:03:10,665
You know, we gotta keep
these accounts full, right?
40
00:03:10,735 --> 00:03:13,659
And then you began to chat.
41
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,737
Italians do love their mamas.
42
00:03:18,055 --> 00:03:19,580
So.
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00:03:24,055 --> 00:03:26,023
Is there something you want to ask me?
44
00:03:26,095 --> 00:03:28,177
- Mm-mmm.
- Nope.
45
00:03:28,255 --> 00:03:30,144
Shit, I'm-a answer anyway.
46
00:03:30,215 --> 00:03:31,341
Yes.
47
00:03:31,415 --> 00:03:34,259
Vee, you know we ain't gonna say shit.
48
00:03:34,335 --> 00:03:36,497
Yes, you are, sweetheart.
49
00:03:36,575 --> 00:03:40,057
You are going to say...
50
00:03:40,135 --> 00:03:43,742
“You know that Warren girl is unstable?
51
00:03:43,815 --> 00:03:46,102
She has a history of violence...
52
00:03:46,175 --> 00:03:49,179
a melodramatic notion of loyalty.
53
00:03:49,255 --> 00:03:52,179
But please, go easy on her,
because you know what?
54
00:03:52,255 --> 00:03:54,417
Even the double cray
need a little bit of help.”
55
00:03:54,495 --> 00:03:57,226
They will probably come to this conclusion
on their own eventually...
56
00:03:57,295 --> 00:03:59,184
but it doesn't hurt
to give 'em a little push.
57
00:03:59,255 --> 00:04:03,226
I know she Fruity Pebbles, but, man...
58
00:04:03,295 --> 00:04:04,785
that's cold.
59
00:04:04,855 --> 00:04:07,665
Is it? Really?
60
00:04:07,735 --> 00:04:10,978
Is it cold for Amazon to underprice books...
61
00:04:11,055 --> 00:04:13,217
just to capture market share?
62
00:04:13,295 --> 00:04:17,983
No, it seems to me that,
as shareholders in this company...
63
00:04:18,055 --> 00:04:22,856
you are immune to the cold,
just like polar bears.
64
00:04:22,935 --> 00:04:25,745
Not sure cheap books...
65
00:04:25,815 --> 00:04:28,580
is the same as pinnin' shit on Crazy.
66
00:04:28,655 --> 00:04:31,659
Ain't you worried Red's gonna wake up
and tell them what happened?
67
00:04:31,735 --> 00:04:35,057
Nope. That is not how OGs like Red
handle their business.
68
00:04:35,135 --> 00:04:38,105
You've got your script.
69
00:04:38,215 --> 00:04:42,664
Follow it. 'Cause there are always
more slocks, baby girl.
70
00:04:42,735 --> 00:04:46,456
Always more locks.
71
00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,945
Enemies?
72
00:04:50,015 --> 00:04:54,737
Well, Red and Vee, they had history.
73
00:04:54,855 --> 00:04:57,506
The Vee that you referenced
is Yvonne Parker?
74
00:04:57,575 --> 00:05:00,385
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's her.
75
00:05:00,455 --> 00:05:02,105
Bad seed.
76
00:05:02,175 --> 00:05:06,942
You can feel it when you're around her-
her bad seediness.
77
00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:10,337
I mean, she's the one
that made things hard core.
78
00:05:10,455 --> 00:05:12,742
I mean, it's not like prison
was summer camp...
79
00:05:12,815 --> 00:05:15,705
but we all sort of got along.
80
00:05:15,775 --> 00:05:18,096
At least nobody
was trying to kill each other.
81
00:05:18,175 --> 00:05:21,702
Now it's like Serbo-Croatia up in here.
82
00:05:21,775 --> 00:05:24,619
You have a close relationship
with Reznikov, correct?
83
00:05:24,695 --> 00:05:26,220
Don't call her that.
84
00:05:26,295 --> 00:05:28,775
Her name's Red. All right?
85
00:05:28,855 --> 00:05:32,018
- Nicknames don't suit our official purpose.
- Oh, yeah?
86
00:05:32,095 --> 00:05:36,066
Yeah, well, treating her
like she's not a person doesn't suit me.
87
00:05:36,135 --> 00:05:41,016
Hey, look, just do your job
and find the asshole who did it, okay?
88
00:05:41,095 --> 00:05:45,464
And you'd know this by now if you
were any good at your job. It was Vee.
89
00:05:45,535 --> 00:05:49,096
Parker, for your official purposes.
90
00:05:49,175 --> 00:05:50,745
I think it's the black one.
91
00:05:50,815 --> 00:05:53,978
I don't know. The one with the hair.
92
00:05:54,055 --> 00:05:56,057
Her real name can't be “Crazy Eyes.”
93
00:05:56,135 --> 00:05:58,376
I don't know. She's the crazy one.
94
00:05:58,455 --> 00:06:00,822
She already be, like,
throwing pie all the time.
95
00:06:00,895 --> 00:06:04,820
But this is, like,
next-level crazy, you know?
96
00:06:04,895 --> 00:06:09,378
Rude, that Vee. She's a very rude person.
97
00:06:12,735 --> 00:06:14,260
I don't like rude.
98
00:06:14,335 --> 00:06:16,986
- It was Crazy Eyes.
- Yes.
99
00:06:17,055 --> 00:06:18,659
But do you happen to know her real name?
100
00:06:18,735 --> 00:06:21,022
Suzanne Warren.
101
00:06:21,095 --> 00:06:22,984
You're sure?
102
00:06:23,055 --> 00:06:25,023
Positive.
103
00:06:25,095 --> 00:06:28,702
I was attacked from behind.
104
00:06:28,775 --> 00:06:31,984
I saw nothing, no one.
105
00:06:32,055 --> 00:06:36,743
I'm an old woman
trying to grow something green.
106
00:06:36,815 --> 00:06:38,943
I don't know who would do this to me.
107
00:06:56,655 --> 00:06:58,703
Chapman.
108
00:06:58,775 --> 00:07:01,540
Mr. Caputo.
109
00:07:01,615 --> 00:07:05,062
I like what you've done with the place.
110
00:07:05,135 --> 00:07:07,103
Sadly, you know, it's...
111
00:07:07,175 --> 00:07:09,781
starting to feel like home in here.
112
00:07:09,855 --> 00:07:11,778
You know I had no choice but to punish you.
113
00:07:11,855 --> 00:07:13,778
You broke into administrative offices.
114
00:07:15,295 --> 00:07:18,936
You said someone asked you to steal these.
115
00:07:19,015 --> 00:07:20,983
Who?
116
00:07:21,055 --> 00:07:23,820
I thought you weren't interested
in what I had to say.
117
00:07:25,895 --> 00:07:28,705
There's a year's worth of invoices in here.
118
00:07:28,775 --> 00:07:30,300
Someone building a case?
119
00:07:31,975 --> 00:07:35,775
'Cause I got a pretty good idea
where you're goin' with this.
120
00:07:35,855 --> 00:07:37,380
But I'd like some details.
121
00:07:37,455 --> 00:07:39,742
You-
122
00:07:39,855 --> 00:07:42,222
You were kind to me when I got here.
123
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:44,343
You let me make that phone call
to my fiancé.
124
00:07:44,415 --> 00:07:48,864
- What's your point?
- My point is that you're a good person.
125
00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:51,176
And Ms. Figueroa-
126
00:07:52,775 --> 00:07:54,504
she isn't.
127
00:07:56,055 --> 00:07:59,901
- Is she embezzling? - You seem like
someone who cares about his job.
128
00:07:59,975 --> 00:08:02,216
And, frankly, you know...
129
00:08:02,335 --> 00:08:04,736
I think this would be a better place
if you were in charge.
130
00:08:04,815 --> 00:08:06,579
Get to the fucking point.
131
00:08:06,655 --> 00:08:08,737
You're in Seg, kid.
132
00:08:08,815 --> 00:08:11,864
I'd be more than happy to leave you in here.
133
00:08:11,935 --> 00:08:14,063
Now tell me exactly what you were planning.
134
00:08:14,135 --> 00:08:18,299
I was gonna take her out.
135
00:08:18,375 --> 00:08:20,059
“Take her out.”
136
00:08:23,695 --> 00:08:26,824
- How?
- Those files...
137
00:08:26,895 --> 00:08:29,785
are a small piece
of a much bigger case against her.
138
00:08:29,855 --> 00:08:32,062
I want to know who your contact is
on the outside.
139
00:08:32,135 --> 00:08:34,024
You don't even need him.
140
00:08:34,095 --> 00:08:37,986
I can explain to you everything
that is in that folder.
141
00:08:38,055 --> 00:08:41,582
I will give you all of the ammunition
you need. I promise.
142
00:08:42,575 --> 00:08:44,577
I will tell you everything.
143
00:08:49,055 --> 00:08:52,582
- If?
- If you stop my transfer.
144
00:08:56,735 --> 00:09:00,103
I got you now, you dirty bitch.
145
00:09:02,055 --> 00:09:04,262
Jesus.
146
00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:07,817
What's goin' on in here?
147
00:09:07,895 --> 00:09:10,978
- You wearin' sweatpants?
- They're slacks.
148
00:09:13,095 --> 00:09:16,417
All right. All right. Y-Y-You gotta breathe.
149
00:09:16,535 --> 00:09:19,220
Hey, hey, hey.
150
00:09:19,295 --> 00:09:23,664
Take-Take- Take a deep breath.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, now.
151
00:09:23,735 --> 00:09:26,466
- Jason-
- J-Joe. I'm-I'm Joe.
152
00:09:26,535 --> 00:09:29,106
No, my husband is Jason.
153
00:09:29,175 --> 00:09:31,701
Oh. What happened to him?
He get arrested?
154
00:09:31,775 --> 00:09:34,062
No.
155
00:09:34,175 --> 00:09:36,496
He's having an affair...
156
00:09:36,575 --> 00:09:38,816
with a...
157
00:09:38,895 --> 00:09:42,581
man named... Gavin.
158
00:09:45,615 --> 00:09:48,459
G-Gavin?
159
00:09:48,535 --> 00:09:51,345
Geez. Yikes.
160
00:09:51,415 --> 00:09:54,498
He's in love.
161
00:09:54,615 --> 00:09:56,504
Wow.
162
00:09:56,615 --> 00:09:59,664
That's, uh- Wow.
163
00:09:59,735 --> 00:10:01,737
How did I not know?
164
00:10:01,815 --> 00:10:04,785
What's... wrong with me?
165
00:10:04,855 --> 00:10:06,459
Y-You had no idea?
166
00:10:06,535 --> 00:10:10,301
A lot of men shave their balls.
It doesn't mean they're gay.
167
00:10:10,375 --> 00:10:12,696
Y-You know it's not you, right?
168
00:10:12,775 --> 00:10:15,176
Hey, you gotta know that, huh?
169
00:10:15,255 --> 00:10:17,303
People are born a certain way, you know?
170
00:10:20,815 --> 00:10:25,059
He used to love me.
171
00:10:25,135 --> 00:10:26,864
I'm sure he did.
172
00:10:26,935 --> 00:10:29,381
Oh, Christ. Look at me.
173
00:10:29,455 --> 00:10:31,822
I used to be so... hot.
174
00:10:31,895 --> 00:10:36,219
Now I'm... hard and... wrinkled.
175
00:10:36,295 --> 00:10:38,741
You're still hot, Fig.
176
00:10:38,815 --> 00:10:42,183
I mean, you're a horrible person,
but you're-
177
00:10:42,255 --> 00:10:44,383
sexy as hell.
178
00:10:45,735 --> 00:10:48,341
- Really?
- Yeah.
179
00:10:48,415 --> 00:10:49,905
Thanks.
180
00:10:51,135 --> 00:10:53,103
Hell.
181
00:10:53,215 --> 00:10:56,264
After all that money you embezzled for him.
182
00:10:58,855 --> 00:11:00,778
Wait. What? What are you talking about?
183
00:11:00,855 --> 00:11:03,665
Embezzlement? Fraud?
184
00:11:05,615 --> 00:11:07,697
I've got your files.
185
00:11:07,775 --> 00:11:09,857
You've been a bad girl.
186
00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:13,064
And if I was your daddy,
I'd spank you real good.
187
00:11:15,975 --> 00:11:17,465
But I'm not.
188
00:11:17,535 --> 00:11:19,025
I'm just a schmuck...
189
00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:23,100
who's been cleaning up your crap
for too long, and I'm done.
190
00:11:24,215 --> 00:11:28,425
You're a goddamn criminal, Mrs. “Fag-ueroa.”
191
00:11:28,495 --> 00:11:29,735
Get out.
192
00:11:30,935 --> 00:11:33,905
- Fine.
- No. Wait. Stop. You can't.
193
00:11:33,975 --> 00:11:35,977
I can't?
194
00:11:36,055 --> 00:11:38,740
Suck my dick, Natalie.
195
00:11:40,295 --> 00:11:41,456
Okay.
196
00:11:44,175 --> 00:11:46,416
Wait. What?
197
00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:56,339
Holy shit.
198
00:11:56,415 --> 00:12:00,056
Yeah, they used to call me
“beer can” in high school.
199
00:12:06,335 --> 00:12:08,815
Ah.
200
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:10,465
Ah, ah- Teeth, teeth-
201
00:12:10,535 --> 00:12:11,616
Sorry.
202
00:12:20,895 --> 00:12:23,262
So we're good?
203
00:12:23,335 --> 00:12:25,337
I do like you down on your knees.
204
00:12:26,975 --> 00:12:30,058
Christ. You should... never speak.
205
00:12:30,135 --> 00:12:32,979
Uh, the files- You'll shut up?
206
00:12:33,055 --> 00:12:36,059
Oh, I- I already gave them to the warden.
207
00:12:36,135 --> 00:12:37,819
He's got copies of everything.
208
00:12:40,255 --> 00:12:42,986
Bye, Nat.
209
00:12:48,055 --> 00:12:49,978
Fuck.
210
00:12:51,215 --> 00:12:54,025
Why didn't you say anything to SIS?
211
00:12:54,095 --> 00:12:57,065
Why would you protect that woman?
212
00:12:57,135 --> 00:13:00,981
That woman can weasel her way
out of anything.
213
00:13:01,895 --> 00:13:04,660
I am handling this my way.
214
00:13:05,815 --> 00:13:08,466
- She cracked your eye socket.
- Mmm. It will heal.
215
00:13:09,815 --> 00:13:12,500
And this gives me time to plan in peace.
216
00:13:14,815 --> 00:13:16,783
Oh-ho.
217
00:13:16,855 --> 00:13:18,345
Ooh.
218
00:13:18,415 --> 00:13:20,986
Kind of hard to plan
when you can't even sit up.
219
00:13:21,055 --> 00:13:23,820
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo.
220
00:13:26,575 --> 00:13:29,419
I used to take the boys to Coney Island.
221
00:13:29,535 --> 00:13:32,345
They loved the spinning rides.
222
00:13:32,455 --> 00:13:35,265
They called them
the “Mamushka drunk rides”...
223
00:13:35,375 --> 00:13:38,424
because I'd always get off
nauseous and stumbling.
224
00:13:39,615 --> 00:13:42,858
Little shits thought it was hilarious.
225
00:13:42,935 --> 00:13:45,381
This is the same feeling...
226
00:13:45,455 --> 00:13:49,460
but without three little boys
pointing and laughing at me.
227
00:13:49,535 --> 00:13:52,425
You should let
the administration handle this.
228
00:13:52,495 --> 00:13:55,146
Oh. Oh.
229
00:13:55,215 --> 00:13:57,536
I should trust the administration...
230
00:13:57,615 --> 00:14:01,097
while they're force-feeding you
through tubes.
231
00:14:01,895 --> 00:14:03,465
Huh?
232
00:14:03,535 --> 00:14:06,744
Salient point.
233
00:14:08,095 --> 00:14:11,497
No, please, tell me that Fig
keeps a vibrator in her desk.
234
00:14:11,575 --> 00:14:15,660
I have this crystal-clear
image in my head of her there...
235
00:14:15,735 --> 00:14:18,306
feet up, high heels
knocking over the pen cup...
236
00:14:18,375 --> 00:14:22,425
while she just goes to town on her clit
with a pocket rocket.
237
00:14:22,495 --> 00:14:24,702
Her drawers are full of snacks and wrappers.
238
00:14:24,775 --> 00:14:28,541
Oh, come on. Man, don't tell me that.
239
00:14:28,615 --> 00:14:32,620
I don't want to think of her
as a bulimic with barf breath.
240
00:14:32,695 --> 00:14:35,619
Good news though-
Caputo canceled my transfer.
241
00:14:35,695 --> 00:14:38,175
Ah. Whoopee.
242
00:14:38,255 --> 00:14:40,462
You get to stay here... in hell.
243
00:14:40,535 --> 00:14:42,105
Hey, maybe...
244
00:14:42,175 --> 00:14:46,066
you'll get slocked to death
by a psychotic heroin dealer.
245
00:14:46,855 --> 00:14:49,381
- How's Red?
- Alive.
246
00:14:49,455 --> 00:14:51,344
That's all I know.
247
00:14:51,415 --> 00:14:53,497
And that's a fuckin' miracle.
248
00:14:53,575 --> 00:14:58,342
You know, not a ton of news
comin' out of the medical unit, so-
249
00:14:58,415 --> 00:15:00,622
I'm sorry, Nicky.
250
00:15:02,295 --> 00:15:05,378
Yeah. No, I mean, those ass clowns
launched their bullshit investigation...
251
00:15:05,455 --> 00:15:09,858
and even though everyone knows
exactly who did it, well-
252
00:15:09,935 --> 00:15:12,063
You know, maybe you should ask
for your transfer back.
253
00:15:12,135 --> 00:15:13,819
Just get the fuck outta here.
254
00:15:13,895 --> 00:15:15,943
It's better than the alternative.
255
00:15:17,695 --> 00:15:19,936
I can't lose any more people, Nicky.
256
00:15:22,535 --> 00:15:24,822
Alex is coming to visit me.
257
00:15:24,895 --> 00:15:27,865
Jesus, Chapman.
258
00:15:27,935 --> 00:15:30,415
You need to figure out
what the fuck you want.
259
00:15:32,095 --> 00:15:33,585
I know.
260
00:15:33,655 --> 00:15:37,819
'Cause if it really is to stay here
in this shithole...
261
00:15:37,895 --> 00:15:40,739
so you can get occasional visits
from your demented girlfriend...
262
00:15:40,815 --> 00:15:43,386
I mean, then, man,
it sounds like you're livin' the dream.
263
00:15:44,135 --> 00:15:45,739
But if you want my advice?
264
00:15:45,815 --> 00:15:48,580
Then get out of your own
goddamn drama for a minute, you know?
265
00:15:48,655 --> 00:15:51,579
And maybe spend some
of that energy praying...
266
00:15:51,655 --> 00:15:55,501
that your roommate makes it out of medical
with all of her brain cells intact.
267
00:15:57,055 --> 00:16:00,025
I'm sorry, Nicky.
I didn't mean to make this about me.
268
00:16:00,095 --> 00:16:02,701
No, don't worry. I get it.
It's not the same for you.
269
00:16:02,815 --> 00:16:06,342
- I care about Red too.
- Uh-huh.
270
00:16:06,415 --> 00:16:08,338
Oh, yeah, but she's not your mom.
271
00:16:08,415 --> 00:16:11,658
It's different when you're family.
272
00:16:16,335 --> 00:16:18,861
Mama, please.
273
00:16:18,935 --> 00:16:20,903
This shit is salty enough
without your tears in it.
274
00:16:20,975 --> 00:16:23,137
You wanna take a break? Venga.
275
00:16:23,215 --> 00:16:25,946
What's looking good today, Bennett?
I'm a hungry man.
276
00:16:26,015 --> 00:16:28,097
There's some baked chicken,
but it looks a little gray.
277
00:16:28,215 --> 00:16:29,705
I tend to stick with the PB&J.
278
00:16:32,935 --> 00:16:35,176
- What's goin' on over there?
- Oh.
279
00:16:35,255 --> 00:16:38,464
Well, you know, Ruiz
is on the transfer list that Fig put out.
280
00:16:38,535 --> 00:16:41,778
It's really sad.
She's got the baby and everything. It's-
281
00:16:41,895 --> 00:16:44,705
I'm cancelin' all the transfers.
282
00:16:44,815 --> 00:16:46,897
Really? How-
283
00:16:48,615 --> 00:16:52,506
- Can you keep a secret?
- Yeah. Absolutely.
284
00:16:52,615 --> 00:16:55,778
Yeah. You seem like it.
285
00:16:55,855 --> 00:16:57,584
Okay, listen.
286
00:16:57,655 --> 00:16:59,498
Some stuff has gone down...
287
00:16:59,575 --> 00:17:03,182
and it looks like my star might be rising...
288
00:17:03,255 --> 00:17:05,735
while Fig's explodes.
289
00:17:07,135 --> 00:17:10,582
- You know what I'm sayin'?
- Not really.
290
00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:13,226
She's out.
291
00:17:13,295 --> 00:17:15,297
I'm in.
292
00:17:15,375 --> 00:17:18,504
Or in-ish. I gotta show
the warden I'm his guy.
293
00:17:18,575 --> 00:17:21,226
- He's testin' me out.
- Wow.
294
00:17:21,295 --> 00:17:23,946
Yeah. This has got to go well, Bennett.
295
00:17:24,015 --> 00:17:26,177
The next few days are crucial.
296
00:17:26,255 --> 00:17:28,462
We gotta make sure of it.
297
00:17:29,655 --> 00:17:31,703
I wanna do things right...
298
00:17:31,775 --> 00:17:34,506
bring guys like you up along with me-
299
00:17:34,615 --> 00:17:36,424
the good guys.
300
00:17:36,495 --> 00:17:39,738
Guys who keep their eyes open
and their noses clean.
301
00:17:39,815 --> 00:17:42,819
Sounds- That sounds great, sir.
302
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:46,616
So listen.
303
00:17:46,695 --> 00:17:48,777
Why don't you go give Ruiz the good news?
304
00:17:48,855 --> 00:17:50,698
Tell her she's not goin' anywhere.
305
00:17:50,775 --> 00:17:53,699
- Me?
- Yeah.
306
00:17:53,775 --> 00:17:56,665
Be the hero. Go ahead.
307
00:17:58,575 --> 00:18:01,784
Thank you. Um, thanks a lot.
308
00:18:01,855 --> 00:18:03,505
Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead, kid.
309
00:18:07,295 --> 00:18:09,616
What's going on?
310
00:18:09,695 --> 00:18:12,938
I'm canceling Ruiz's transfer.
311
00:18:13,015 --> 00:18:14,983
She's staying put.
312
00:18:15,055 --> 00:18:18,264
- So nice of you.
- I do what I can.
313
00:18:21,575 --> 00:18:23,976
Hey, should you be carrying
such a heavy tray?
314
00:18:24,815 --> 00:18:26,544
It's fine. Thanks.
315
00:18:27,895 --> 00:18:30,978
It's better.
316
00:18:54,895 --> 00:18:56,385
- Listen, T-
- Stop.
317
00:18:56,455 --> 00:18:59,140
Can we please not have a whole talk
about our feelings...
318
00:18:59,215 --> 00:19:01,866
and what happened
and, like, status, because...
319
00:19:01,935 --> 00:19:05,462
I never learned that,
and it really makes me, like, want to...
320
00:19:05,535 --> 00:19:07,856
jump out of my skin, so-
321
00:19:07,935 --> 00:19:11,178
Can we just sit here and be cooler now?
322
00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:17,223
Well, maybe just a little talk?
323
00:19:18,375 --> 00:19:21,299
I mean, look,
what if Amanda talked about it?
324
00:19:21,375 --> 00:19:24,458
Right? Like-Like her fucked-up
relationship with mumsy and...
325
00:19:24,535 --> 00:19:28,062
how hard that made things with McKenzie
when they took their cruise to Spain and shit?
326
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:32,703
- Could you do it like that?
- I'll work on it. Okay?
327
00:19:34,895 --> 00:19:36,385
I swear.
328
00:19:38,735 --> 00:19:41,500
I have an appointment
to meet with my guru...
329
00:19:41,615 --> 00:19:44,539
to get a mantra soon,
so I'll start right after that-
330
00:19:44,615 --> 00:19:47,824
but before I get my lips
injected with ass fat...
331
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:50,023
so that we can really talk.
332
00:19:52,415 --> 00:19:55,259
- Ass fat.
- Here.
333
00:19:55,335 --> 00:19:56,939
Because you look like a monkey.
334
00:19:57,015 --> 00:19:59,985
Oh. Damn. Here I am with no peanuts for you.
335
00:20:00,055 --> 00:20:02,661
- I'll just
take your Jell-O, gelatin. - No!
336
00:20:02,735 --> 00:20:04,817
Like hell you Will. Shit.
337
00:20:04,895 --> 00:20:06,659
You know red my favorite flavor.
338
00:20:06,735 --> 00:20:08,260
Yeah.
339
00:20:10,415 --> 00:20:12,497
You're an animal.
340
00:20:12,575 --> 00:20:16,625
And your little electro-slock therapy?
You're not foolin' anyone.
341
00:20:18,175 --> 00:20:22,021
Please tell my old friend Red
that I- I hope she feels better.
342
00:20:22,095 --> 00:20:23,904
Oh, some flippin' friend you are.
343
00:20:24,975 --> 00:20:26,659
What's the matter with you people?
344
00:20:26,735 --> 00:20:28,703
“You people"?
345
00:20:28,775 --> 00:20:30,504
You mean black people?
346
00:20:30,575 --> 00:20:33,499
I mean blind people, all right?
347
00:20:33,575 --> 00:20:36,465
Blindly following a fucking psychopath.
348
00:20:36,535 --> 00:20:39,061
All right, little ones.
349
00:20:39,175 --> 00:20:41,223
Now, if you're done with your accusations...
350
00:20:41,295 --> 00:20:45,425
and your name-calling,
we'd all like to finish our meal in peace.
351
00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:50,102
May you never have a minute of peace.
352
00:20:55,055 --> 00:20:58,457
I trust with you two around, I won't.
353
00:20:58,535 --> 00:21:01,141
Oh, yeah. We'll be around.
354
00:21:09,295 --> 00:21:11,502
Aha.
355
00:21:12,215 --> 00:21:13,979
Shut the fuck up.
356
00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:17,580
Aw. You bitches friends again?
357
00:21:17,655 --> 00:21:19,145
Oh, now.
358
00:21:20,575 --> 00:21:24,625
Ain't that some Sisterhood
of the Traveling Pants shit?
359
00:21:24,695 --> 00:21:26,299
Man, y'all know she done it.
360
00:21:28,095 --> 00:21:31,099
What, you don't think she won't
go after your ass one day?
361
00:21:31,175 --> 00:21:35,225
You make her mad,
look at her wrong, whatever?
362
00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:38,936
Look, business is good.
And I ain't rockin' the boat.
363
00:21:39,015 --> 00:21:41,700
Can't we all just get along?
364
00:21:42,815 --> 00:21:45,182
No. Not while she's around.
365
00:21:46,495 --> 00:21:48,577
Don't feel bad if you don't see it yet.
366
00:21:48,655 --> 00:21:50,657
Took me damn near 15 years.
367
00:21:50,735 --> 00:21:53,181
I just hope y'all wise up
before it's too late.
368
00:22:55,535 --> 00:22:57,025
It's up to you.
369
00:22:57,095 --> 00:22:59,621
You could go full-on
Britney Spears meltdown.
370
00:22:59,695 --> 00:23:03,177
Oh, no. Cancer chic is anything but.
371
00:23:03,255 --> 00:23:06,498
Now, I'm thinkin' a nice Emma Watson pixie
will be cute though.
372
00:23:06,575 --> 00:23:07,940
Hmm.
373
00:23:08,015 --> 00:23:11,701
I appreciate your guys' choices,
but I'm thinkin' right here.
374
00:23:11,775 --> 00:23:13,823
Uh, you mean like Victoria Beckham?
375
00:23:13,895 --> 00:23:17,263
Sorry, shortcake.
Above the ears or it doesn't count.
376
00:23:17,375 --> 00:23:19,377
Hey, you wanna run with the big boys...
377
00:23:19,455 --> 00:23:21,184
you gotta prove you're one of us, hmm?
378
00:23:21,295 --> 00:23:23,104
I thought this was about the girls.
379
00:23:23,175 --> 00:23:25,098
It's confusing, I know.
380
00:23:28,215 --> 00:23:31,219
- Hey.
- I'm canceling Safe Place.
381
00:23:31,295 --> 00:23:33,582
- I thought you should know.
- Why?
382
00:23:34,815 --> 00:23:37,500
Wait! Mr. Healy, wait.
383
00:23:37,575 --> 00:23:41,216
Aw. ls your boyfriend hurt?
384
00:23:41,295 --> 00:23:43,866
Don't do that.
385
00:23:43,935 --> 00:23:45,460
Come in!
386
00:23:46,815 --> 00:23:49,785
- Hey, boss.
- Hello, O'Neill.
387
00:23:49,855 --> 00:23:51,903
How are you on this fine day?
388
00:23:51,975 --> 00:23:54,501
Oh, I'm good. Thanks.
389
00:23:55,615 --> 00:23:57,538
I bought a banjolele on craigslist.
390
00:23:57,615 --> 00:23:59,424
I don't know what that is.
391
00:23:59,495 --> 00:24:02,226
It's like a four-string banjo, but little.
392
00:24:02,335 --> 00:24:05,145
It's, you know-
It's a ukulele version of a banjo.
393
00:24:05,255 --> 00:24:08,259
Ah. Asked and answered.
394
00:24:08,335 --> 00:24:12,226
So, aside from the news
of your adorable online purchase...
395
00:24:12,295 --> 00:24:14,104
is there another reason for your visit?
396
00:24:14,175 --> 00:24:16,416
Oh, yeah, um-
397
00:24:16,495 --> 00:24:18,497
- What do you wanna do about the nuns?
- Nuns?
398
00:24:18,575 --> 00:24:20,339
- There's a gaggle of them.
- Gaggle?
399
00:24:20,415 --> 00:24:23,624
Uh, like a- like a murder of crows.
There's a gaggle of nuns.
400
00:24:25,255 --> 00:24:27,940
We're here to support
Jane Ingalls's hunger strike.
401
00:24:28,015 --> 00:24:31,383
- Oh, Jesus.
- Watch your mouth.
402
00:24:32,255 --> 00:24:34,178
I can't have this today.
403
00:24:34,255 --> 00:24:37,179
Not now.
Your timing could not have been worse.
404
00:24:37,255 --> 00:24:39,257
So sorry to inconvenience you.
405
00:24:39,335 --> 00:24:42,100
Look, Sister.
406
00:24:42,175 --> 00:24:44,701
I'm the good guy.
I-I-I want things to be good.
407
00:24:47,295 --> 00:24:50,060
- Could you come back in three to five days?
- No, I could not.
408
00:24:50,175 --> 00:24:52,018
I had to ask.
409
00:24:54,495 --> 00:24:57,305
- Babysit the nuns.
- Sir, I don't think that's a good idea.
410
00:24:57,375 --> 00:25:00,902
- I got a history with nuns.
- Suck it up.
411
00:25:01,815 --> 00:25:03,499
I need things calm and contained.
412
00:25:03,575 --> 00:25:06,260
No drama.
And if the press comes, you call me.
413
00:25:13,375 --> 00:25:15,377
But it wasn't me.
414
00:25:15,455 --> 00:25:20,143
That's very good. That is exactly what you
say when you go in there to talk to SIS.
415
00:25:20,215 --> 00:25:22,980
- It's perfect, Suzanne.
- No, Vee.
416
00:25:23,055 --> 00:25:25,456
It really wasn't me. I didn't do it.
417
00:25:25,535 --> 00:25:28,778
Wow, when you commit,
you really do commit, don't you?
418
00:25:28,855 --> 00:25:30,380
I admire that.
419
00:25:31,815 --> 00:25:33,419
Between us...
420
00:25:33,495 --> 00:25:36,658
I just want to say thank you, little girl.
421
00:25:36,735 --> 00:25:40,581
What you did was rough,
but it had to be done.
422
00:25:40,655 --> 00:25:42,339
- Vee-
- Shh, shh, shh, shh.
423
00:25:42,415 --> 00:25:44,543
We shouldn't talk about this anymore.
424
00:25:44,615 --> 00:25:48,586
I got you somethin' special
from the commissary.
425
00:25:50,055 --> 00:25:54,105
We can play later, you and me.
426
00:26:10,135 --> 00:26:12,217
All right. It's like this.
427
00:26:12,295 --> 00:26:16,459
Stop, don't talk to me,
loser, lame boy, wannabe.
428
00:26:16,535 --> 00:26:20,381
Oh, like, totally, all you want to be is me.
429
00:26:20,455 --> 00:26:22,059
Stay fresh.
430
00:26:22,135 --> 00:26:25,059
- Okay. Now you try.
- Okay, so it's like-
431
00:26:25,135 --> 00:26:29,140
Stop, don't talk to me,
loser, lame ass, wannabe.
432
00:26:29,215 --> 00:26:31,980
- “Boy.” It's “lame boy.”
- Yeah, but we're talkin' Pennsatucky.
433
00:26:32,055 --> 00:26:34,296
So shouldn't it be like
“lame ass” or “lame girl”?
434
00:26:36,375 --> 00:26:38,696
Y'all are sad fuckin' assholes.
435
00:26:38,775 --> 00:26:40,379
You know, this is really bullying.
436
00:26:40,455 --> 00:26:43,982
And while you have every right to your
negative feelings towards Pennsatucky...
437
00:26:44,055 --> 00:26:47,138
you're being cruel,
and I think you're both better than that.
438
00:26:47,215 --> 00:26:50,185
All workers,
pick up your work card before reporting-
439
00:26:50,295 --> 00:26:52,263
- Embrace the light.
- You know what?
440
00:26:52,335 --> 00:26:55,657
I can take care of myself,
Ching Chong China Doll.
441
00:26:57,215 --> 00:27:00,264
She's Japanese Scottish,
you ignorant dumbass.
442
00:27:00,335 --> 00:27:01,825
Ignorant dumbass dyke.
443
00:27:01,895 --> 00:27:03,420
Ho-ho-ho!
444
00:27:04,655 --> 00:27:06,145
Excuse me?
445
00:27:06,215 --> 00:27:09,298
Like we haven't seen you hangin' out
with fatty-fatty man-girl.
446
00:27:09,375 --> 00:27:10,979
Oh, yeah? So what?
447
00:27:11,055 --> 00:27:12,784
Oh, what is with all this name-calling?
448
00:27:12,855 --> 00:27:14,744
We're expressin' our feelings...
449
00:27:14,815 --> 00:27:19,343
in lieu of physical violence-
something Mr. Healy taught me.
450
00:27:19,415 --> 00:27:20,940
- Oh, yeah?
- Yep.
451
00:27:21,015 --> 00:27:22,858
Then where were you before?
452
00:27:22,935 --> 00:27:24,983
No one came
to his Safe Place thing, you know.
453
00:27:26,095 --> 00:27:28,860
He was all sad and mad.
454
00:27:28,935 --> 00:27:31,063
And I got his weird Russian cookies. Up top.
455
00:27:31,135 --> 00:27:34,457
Everyone in this place is sad and mad.
456
00:27:34,535 --> 00:27:37,618
I mean, I get it.
We're in prison. It sucks.
457
00:27:37,695 --> 00:27:40,380
But we should be leaning on each other...
458
00:27:40,455 --> 00:27:42,935
finding support in our fellow criminals.
459
00:27:43,055 --> 00:27:46,104
So we're not isolated. I need a friend.
460
00:27:46,975 --> 00:27:48,977
Don't look at me.
461
00:27:49,055 --> 00:27:51,296
I got a friend.
462
00:27:53,135 --> 00:27:56,059
Hey, nobody showed up at Safe Place?
463
00:27:56,135 --> 00:27:59,184
Nope. Not a one.
464
00:27:59,255 --> 00:28:02,577
Ah, no more Safe Place.
It's probably all your fault.
465
00:28:02,655 --> 00:28:05,022
Okay, this is totally weird.
466
00:28:05,095 --> 00:28:07,302
I'm in the wrong outfit.
467
00:28:07,415 --> 00:28:09,224
I like your sweater.
468
00:28:14,975 --> 00:28:16,977
It's soft.
469
00:28:17,055 --> 00:28:20,264
Like your resolve
when you're offered a plea deal.
470
00:28:22,575 --> 00:28:25,146
It came down at the very last minute, Piper.
471
00:28:25,215 --> 00:28:28,583
And they promised me
it would put him away for good.
472
00:28:28,655 --> 00:28:31,306
But it made me a perjurer
and you a free woman.
473
00:28:31,375 --> 00:28:34,219
- I thought you were gonna tell the truth.
- I thought you were gonna lie.
474
00:28:34,295 --> 00:28:36,536
Jesus, we're like
the fucking O. Henry story.
475
00:28:43,895 --> 00:28:46,421
It's good to see your face.
476
00:28:46,535 --> 00:28:49,106
I don't know what to say.
477
00:28:49,175 --> 00:28:51,018
You have every right to be angry.
478
00:28:51,095 --> 00:28:54,383
I don't know if I'm angry.
479
00:28:54,455 --> 00:28:58,540
I'm confused by you.
480
00:28:58,615 --> 00:29:01,346
I'm confused by me too.
481
00:29:01,415 --> 00:29:03,861
I'm pretty much the master
of handling things completely wrong.
482
00:29:03,935 --> 00:29:05,903
Yeah, well, that's an understatement.
483
00:29:07,655 --> 00:29:09,464
I'm a fuckup.
484
00:29:09,535 --> 00:29:13,335
And now I get to be a fuckup
in a shithole apartment in Queens...
485
00:29:13,415 --> 00:29:15,782
too afraid to even open my curtains.
486
00:29:18,975 --> 00:29:20,943
I'm really fucking lonely, Piper.
487
00:29:21,015 --> 00:29:23,780
Well, I'm sure you'll find somebody
to keep your bed warm.
488
00:29:28,375 --> 00:29:30,025
I sleep with a gun.
489
00:29:30,095 --> 00:29:32,939
You what? Alex, what the hell?
You're on probation.
490
00:29:33,015 --> 00:29:35,859
There is a car parked outside
of my apartment every day.
491
00:29:35,935 --> 00:29:37,505
He's trying to scare me.
492
00:29:39,215 --> 00:29:43,186
I want to go out there with a baseball bat
and smash the fucking windshield in.
493
00:29:45,375 --> 00:29:47,139
Honestly, I should just start dealing again.
494
00:29:48,815 --> 00:29:51,864
Find a bigger, tougher new kingpin
who can beat up my old kingpin.
495
00:29:51,975 --> 00:29:55,104
- That's not funny.
- It's not a joke.
496
00:29:55,175 --> 00:29:57,781
What am I qualified to do?
497
00:29:57,855 --> 00:30:01,337
I have- I have no job.
I'm afraid to leave my apartment.
498
00:30:01,415 --> 00:30:05,340
I got so used to sleeping with the lights on
that I'm totally freaked out by the dark.
499
00:30:05,415 --> 00:30:10,023
My probation officer is a joke.
His name is David Crockett.
500
00:30:10,095 --> 00:30:13,816
Davy fucking Crockett is my probation officer.
501
00:30:13,895 --> 00:30:15,579
Like King of the Wild Frontier?
502
00:30:15,655 --> 00:30:18,135
King of sitting on his fat fucking ass...
503
00:30:18,215 --> 00:30:20,422
stuffing his face with Swiss rolls...
504
00:30:20,495 --> 00:30:24,705
hoping to bust me
for some stupid infraction.
505
00:30:26,855 --> 00:30:30,337
You'd think that part of his job
would be protecting his probies, you know?
506
00:30:32,375 --> 00:30:35,697
Nobody gives a shit about ex-cons.
507
00:30:35,775 --> 00:30:37,539
What are you gonna do?
508
00:30:45,375 --> 00:30:47,298
- I'm skipping town.
- You can't.
509
00:30:47,375 --> 00:30:51,266
I don't have a choice.
These people know where I live.
510
00:30:51,335 --> 00:30:53,064
That's why I wanted to see you.
511
00:30:53,135 --> 00:30:56,503
When I go, Piper, I can't come back.
512
00:30:56,575 --> 00:30:59,146
I have to just disappear.
513
00:31:03,415 --> 00:31:06,259
- You can't leave me.
- Piper, I'm in danger.
514
00:31:08,975 --> 00:31:11,501
But I don't have anyone left.
515
00:31:16,735 --> 00:31:18,260
I'm sorry, Piper.
516
00:31:21,655 --> 00:31:24,864
I'm sorry for all of it.
517
00:31:24,935 --> 00:31:27,541
I know that my track record is shit.
518
00:31:29,495 --> 00:31:31,338
But I really do love you.
519
00:31:31,415 --> 00:31:34,544
- Yeah, well, I hate you.
- No, you don't.
520
00:31:40,695 --> 00:31:42,185
No.
521
00:31:43,935 --> 00:31:45,664
No, I don't.
522
00:31:54,855 --> 00:31:59,144
Any available officers
to the front gate for transfers.
523
00:32:03,055 --> 00:32:06,343
- Hey, junkie.
- Hey, you traitorous piece of shit.
524
00:32:06,415 --> 00:32:09,146
It's time to start scrubbin'
that dirty little soul of yours.
525
00:32:10,775 --> 00:32:12,903
Well, I wouldn't worry about it too much.
526
00:32:12,975 --> 00:32:15,740
I'm slowly killing myself with corn syrup.
527
00:32:15,815 --> 00:32:18,466
Boo, you sold her out.
528
00:32:18,535 --> 00:32:21,015
You're part of why
she's lying in that hospital bed.
529
00:32:24,415 --> 00:32:26,065
All right. Look.
530
00:32:27,455 --> 00:32:29,457
You need to make it right.
531
00:32:29,535 --> 00:32:31,503
What do you want me to do about it?
532
00:32:31,575 --> 00:32:33,703
Smother Parker in her sleep
with my left ass cheek?
533
00:32:35,735 --> 00:32:39,103
- I'm a lover, not a fighter.
- Aw, come on.
534
00:32:39,175 --> 00:32:42,543
You of all people know there's
a million ways to hurt someone.
535
00:32:44,255 --> 00:32:48,897
So tell your old pal Nicky
where she stashes her shit.
536
00:32:50,375 --> 00:32:53,026
Find that last shred of loyalty.
537
00:32:54,695 --> 00:32:56,140
Where are you?
538
00:32:56,215 --> 00:32:57,740
- Where are you?
- Whoa. Whoa, whoa.
539
00:32:57,815 --> 00:32:59,499
Wh-What's goin' on, yo?
540
00:32:59,575 --> 00:33:01,623
I can't find it. I know it was here.
541
00:33:01,695 --> 00:33:04,221
Now it's not here. I know it was here.
542
00:33:04,335 --> 00:33:07,145
Twenty-two left, 14 right, nine left.
543
00:33:07,255 --> 00:33:08,859
I know it was here.
544
00:33:08,935 --> 00:33:11,256
- Your lock?
- Shh!
545
00:33:12,575 --> 00:33:14,339
Lady Locksley.
546
00:33:15,575 --> 00:33:17,703
Aw, Shit.
547
00:33:17,775 --> 00:33:20,016
I think she might have done something bad.
548
00:33:20,095 --> 00:33:23,144
- What are you talkin' about?
- I think I did it.
549
00:33:24,615 --> 00:33:28,461
I think I attacked that Russian lady
and hit and hit and hit her.
550
00:33:28,535 --> 00:33:32,221
Yo, you think? Suzanne, if you done it,
don't you think you would know?
551
00:33:32,295 --> 00:33:34,901
No, I don't always know what I'm doing.
552
00:33:34,975 --> 00:33:36,898
No, sometimes I block stuff out.
553
00:33:36,975 --> 00:33:39,660
Some bad stuff, like-
554
00:33:39,735 --> 00:33:42,466
like that time
I did the thing to my neighbor.
555
00:33:42,535 --> 00:33:44,617
You don't sound like you blocked that out.
556
00:33:44,695 --> 00:33:46,663
Well-
557
00:33:46,735 --> 00:33:48,658
No. That one's still pretty vivid.
558
00:33:48,735 --> 00:33:50,942
But Vee says I did it.
559
00:33:51,015 --> 00:33:54,986
Yo, Suzanne. Vee is a liar.
560
00:33:55,095 --> 00:33:57,746
No. No. No, no, no, no, no, no.
561
00:33:57,815 --> 00:33:59,579
No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
562
00:33:59,655 --> 00:34:03,501
She is a truth-teller. She told me that.
563
00:34:03,575 --> 00:34:05,498
She says...
564
00:34:05,575 --> 00:34:07,657
we're straight-up...
565
00:34:07,775 --> 00:34:10,858
built on a foundation of honesty...
566
00:34:10,935 --> 00:34:12,585
and loyalty.
567
00:34:12,695 --> 00:34:15,699
Yo, built on a foundation of bullshit,
more like!
568
00:34:15,775 --> 00:34:17,698
You think that woman loyal to you?
569
00:34:17,775 --> 00:34:21,177
She is playing you,
and this game is for serious.
570
00:34:21,255 --> 00:34:23,257
You take the blame on this,
you goin' to max.
571
00:34:23,335 --> 00:34:25,941
You gettin' rapped with attempted murder.
572
00:34:26,015 --> 00:34:29,383
Yo, why would you take the blame
when you ain't done nothin'?
573
00:34:29,455 --> 00:34:32,379
That woman is evil, and she's tryin'
to frame you and do you harm.
574
00:34:32,455 --> 00:34:35,664
No! Don't you dare speak ill of her!
575
00:34:42,735 --> 00:34:46,899
You know, she told me you'd say bad things.
576
00:34:46,975 --> 00:34:50,616
Yeah, she warned me.
And now here you are doing just that.
577
00:34:50,695 --> 00:34:53,062
- Suzanne.
- So...
578
00:34:53,135 --> 00:34:56,662
I think you'd better go.
579
00:35:01,135 --> 00:35:03,786
- You poor crazy fool.
- No.
580
00:35:05,175 --> 00:35:07,382
I am not crazy.
581
00:35:08,415 --> 00:35:11,021
I am unique.
582
00:35:11,095 --> 00:35:14,622
There used to be this show on TV
about girls who, like...
583
00:35:14,695 --> 00:35:17,141
had no idea they were pregnant.
584
00:35:17,215 --> 00:35:20,856
And I always thought,
“Yeah. I could see that.”
585
00:35:20,935 --> 00:35:25,577
You're kind of chunky.
You don't feel so hot anyway.
586
00:35:25,655 --> 00:35:28,420
But now I'm calling bullshit on it.
587
00:35:28,495 --> 00:35:32,102
I mean, I'm- I'm not
all that popping out or anything.
588
00:35:32,175 --> 00:35:35,736
Aleida says the women
in our family carry in our ass.
589
00:35:35,815 --> 00:35:38,182
But I feel her.
590
00:35:38,255 --> 00:35:39,905
I really feel her in there.
591
00:35:43,775 --> 00:35:45,903
Daya, I, uh- I-
592
00:35:45,975 --> 00:35:48,023
I can't tell anyone.
593
00:35:49,015 --> 00:35:51,177
- Oh.
- No, look.
594
00:35:51,295 --> 00:35:53,104
Listen to me.
595
00:35:53,175 --> 00:35:55,462
Something happened with Fig-
596
00:35:55,535 --> 00:35:58,186
embezzling or something.
597
00:35:58,255 --> 00:35:59,905
Caputo's getting promoted.
598
00:35:59,975 --> 00:36:03,536
He says that I'm looking at a promotion too.
599
00:36:03,615 --> 00:36:05,822
It would be crazy to come clean right now.
600
00:36:05,895 --> 00:36:09,377
- This means more money for-for us.
- This means you can't be the dad.
601
00:36:09,455 --> 00:36:13,062
Come on, baby. Look.
Hey, we'll figure it out.
602
00:36:17,335 --> 00:36:19,417
Don't say anything about
the Fig thing, okay?
603
00:36:19,495 --> 00:36:21,975
It's... still on the down-low.
604
00:36:22,055 --> 00:36:23,784
Well, you were looking for an excuse.
605
00:36:25,015 --> 00:36:27,336
I guess this raise-promotion thing
is as good as any.
606
00:36:27,455 --> 00:36:30,061
I'm not looking for an excuse.
607
00:36:33,015 --> 00:36:35,336
I love you, John.
608
00:36:35,415 --> 00:36:37,577
But you're a pussy.
609
00:36:37,655 --> 00:36:40,625
- I gotta get back to work.
- Daya.
610
00:36:40,695 --> 00:36:42,345
Daya, I'm a man on the rise.
611
00:36:42,415 --> 00:36:44,065
I'm not a-
612
00:36:44,135 --> 00:36:46,661
Seriously, don't say anything
about the Fig thing, okay?
613
00:36:46,735 --> 00:36:49,625
It was told to me in confidence. Please?
614
00:36:53,295 --> 00:36:57,300
So, Fig's out? I knew that skinny puta
was pullin' some shit.
615
00:37:00,255 --> 00:37:01,939
She never smiled with her teeth.
616
00:37:02,015 --> 00:37:04,302
You can't trust a bitch
don't smile with her teeth.
617
00:37:04,375 --> 00:37:06,855
She had some nice shoes though, man.
618
00:37:06,935 --> 00:37:08,983
Yo, you seen the footwear on that one?
619
00:37:09,055 --> 00:37:12,059
If she was stealing, you know exactly
where that money was going.
620
00:37:12,135 --> 00:37:13,785
If I was stealing big...
621
00:37:13,855 --> 00:37:17,177
I would buy me something
that won't wear out from walkin' around.
622
00:37:17,295 --> 00:37:19,218
Like a diamond for my belly button.
623
00:37:19,295 --> 00:37:20,820
- No, for real.
- That's nice.
624
00:37:20,895 --> 00:37:22,977
- That's nothin'.
- That looks good.
625
00:37:29,335 --> 00:37:30,860
Well.
626
00:37:30,975 --> 00:37:33,182
Would you look at Norma Appleseed over here.
627
00:37:33,255 --> 00:37:35,144
What you planning, an orchard?
628
00:37:35,215 --> 00:37:38,059
No. I know what you're up to.
629
00:37:38,135 --> 00:37:40,866
What were you gonna use to grind them?
630
00:37:44,575 --> 00:37:45,781
Wow.
631
00:37:45,855 --> 00:37:49,541
Look at you, quiet fire.
632
00:37:49,615 --> 00:37:52,903
Man, you know how many seeds you're gonna
need to make a lethal dose of arsenic?
633
00:37:52,975 --> 00:37:57,139
More than all the apples
ever given to any teacher you've ever known.
634
00:37:57,215 --> 00:37:59,456
And then you're gonna need a blender.
You're gonna need lye.
635
00:37:59,535 --> 00:38:01,025
And you're gonna need an airtight container.
636
00:38:01,095 --> 00:38:03,336
And then you got to get it down
Vee's fuckin' throat.
637
00:38:04,735 --> 00:38:07,818
Ay, mama.
You didn't think this one through.
638
00:38:09,135 --> 00:38:12,139
Yeah. I know a few things.
639
00:38:13,255 --> 00:38:15,257
I know she hurt your girl.
640
00:38:15,335 --> 00:38:17,941
And I know she gotta go, but...
641
00:38:18,015 --> 00:38:19,505
there are other ways.
642
00:38:22,415 --> 00:38:24,144
All you got to do is ask.
643
00:38:24,215 --> 00:38:26,900
Trans pack is ready in the Woods office.
644
00:38:26,975 --> 00:38:28,625
Okay, tonight...
645
00:38:28,695 --> 00:38:30,663
I want you to go home and look up...
646
00:38:30,735 --> 00:38:33,215
“Leopard cub kills baboon
and tries to adopt its baby.”
647
00:38:33,295 --> 00:38:37,744
Then you come back tomorrow,
and you tell me babies are born with sin.
648
00:38:37,815 --> 00:38:41,536
- Why don't you give us the highlights?
- Okay, fine.
649
00:38:41,615 --> 00:38:45,222
A leopard cub kills a baboon, right?
650
00:38:45,295 --> 00:38:49,300
And then, as the leopard's dragging
the bloody baboon corpse home for dinner...
651
00:38:49,375 --> 00:38:52,060
a baby baboon falls from the folds
of its dead mother.
652
00:38:52,135 --> 00:38:54,706
And you're thinkin',
“Leopard's gonna eat the baby,” right?
653
00:38:54,775 --> 00:38:57,346
A little baby-baboon appetizer
before the main course?
654
00:38:57,415 --> 00:38:59,224
But no.
655
00:38:59,295 --> 00:39:02,822
He shelters the baby.
He even defends it against a hyena.
656
00:39:02,895 --> 00:39:06,183
And why? Why would this wild animal do that?
657
00:39:06,255 --> 00:39:11,944
Because even a feral,
wild, predatory beast...
658
00:39:12,015 --> 00:39:13,938
can recognize innocence when it sees it...
659
00:39:14,015 --> 00:39:16,780
and it feels the need to protect it.
660
00:39:16,855 --> 00:39:19,426
Yet Catholics can't.
661
00:39:20,455 --> 00:39:22,059
Hey, what is your problem?
662
00:39:22,135 --> 00:39:24,058
What's my problem?
663
00:39:24,135 --> 00:39:26,706
Catholic school. That's my problem.
664
00:39:26,775 --> 00:39:30,177
You people seem all la-la-la God...
665
00:39:30,255 --> 00:39:34,101
but in reality,
you are professional humiliators.
666
00:39:34,175 --> 00:39:36,542
Oh. Did someone get rapped with a ruler?
667
00:39:36,615 --> 00:39:39,061
Get over it.
You're a grown-up. Let it go.
668
00:39:39,135 --> 00:39:42,821
- But what happened to the baby baboon?
- It died of exposure.
669
00:39:44,095 --> 00:39:45,904
I suppose it was God's will.
670
00:39:45,975 --> 00:39:47,739
Nonsense.
671
00:39:47,815 --> 00:39:50,261
It was just really cold- like a nun's heart.
672
00:39:53,855 --> 00:39:55,345
Oh, fuck.
673
00:39:55,455 --> 00:39:57,264
Nuns say “fuck”?
674
00:39:57,335 --> 00:39:59,303
I'm a former nun.
675
00:39:59,415 --> 00:40:01,497
Ugh. They all came.
676
00:40:02,295 --> 00:40:03,979
Who knew I still had juice?
677
00:40:04,055 --> 00:40:06,456
Aren't you pleased?
Your friends showed up for you.
678
00:40:06,535 --> 00:40:08,219
I need to think about something else.
679
00:40:08,295 --> 00:40:10,901
I keep having fantasies about biscuits.
680
00:40:10,975 --> 00:40:15,981
You made your bed.
Now you can lie in it, strapped to an IV.
681
00:40:16,055 --> 00:40:19,423
Or is it two IVs? I'm seeing double.
682
00:40:19,495 --> 00:40:21,862
Looks like there's two of you on that bed.
683
00:40:21,935 --> 00:40:25,257
- I wish.
- You do?
684
00:40:28,575 --> 00:40:32,978
I always wondered about
that whole celibacy thing with you people.
685
00:40:33,055 --> 00:40:35,023
- How does that work?
- Well...
686
00:40:35,095 --> 00:40:38,338
if you read the papers, you know better
in some cases than in others.
687
00:40:38,455 --> 00:40:41,459
What about with you?
688
00:40:41,535 --> 00:40:43,537
- Did you ever-
- I've masturbated.
689
00:40:43,615 --> 00:40:48,576
There's this statue of Jesus on the cross
that was especially ripped.
690
00:40:48,655 --> 00:40:50,180
He was my guy.
691
00:40:52,455 --> 00:40:55,664
Before Dmitri,
there was this man named Pavel.
692
00:40:55,735 --> 00:41:00,024
Even talking about him now,
there's a tightening.
693
00:41:01,175 --> 00:41:04,543
- So what happened?
- America, home of the free.
694
00:41:04,615 --> 00:41:08,939
Dmitri was tame in bed, bold in life.
695
00:41:09,015 --> 00:41:10,938
Pavel, the opposite.
696
00:41:11,015 --> 00:41:12,505
I went with life.
697
00:41:12,615 --> 00:41:15,858
I went with the man
who was going to go to America.
698
00:41:18,175 --> 00:41:20,462
So you didn't like having sex
with your husband?
699
00:41:20,535 --> 00:41:25,336
Oh, I wouldn't say that. Mmm. I like sex.
700
00:41:25,415 --> 00:41:29,579
I never rolled away after and thought,
“Oh, I wish I hadn't done that.” No.
701
00:41:29,655 --> 00:41:31,623
It was always nice.
702
00:41:31,695 --> 00:41:34,585
But there's a part of me-
703
00:41:34,655 --> 00:41:36,464
a part of every woman, I think-
704
00:41:36,535 --> 00:41:38,458
that doesn't want nice.
705
00:41:38,535 --> 00:41:43,462
That's the problem with married sex
in general- no more fear.
706
00:41:43,535 --> 00:41:46,266
Fear is good?
707
00:41:46,335 --> 00:41:50,226
- Fear is very good.
- Oh.
708
00:41:50,295 --> 00:41:53,458
But I'll say this
for my hairy-backed husband.
709
00:41:53,535 --> 00:41:56,300
He always took care of me.
710
00:41:56,375 --> 00:41:58,901
It turned him on.
711
00:41:58,975 --> 00:42:01,455
He could spend weeks down there.
712
00:42:02,895 --> 00:42:05,819
I do enjoy the release.
713
00:42:05,895 --> 00:42:09,104
It cracks my neck.
714
00:42:09,895 --> 00:42:13,058
- Oh.
- No, thank you.
715
00:42:13,175 --> 00:42:16,782
Oh, come on. Stop it with this nonsense.
716
00:42:16,855 --> 00:42:19,540
Believe me,
all I want is to eat that sandwich...
717
00:42:19,615 --> 00:42:22,505
but I can't break my strike
with a hundred nuns out there.
718
00:42:22,575 --> 00:42:24,418
Please take it away.
719
00:42:29,055 --> 00:42:32,264
You still worry about
what your friends think?
720
00:42:32,335 --> 00:42:34,337
You think I'm acting childish?
721
00:42:34,415 --> 00:42:38,261
Who's the one plotting revenge
in her bed like a gangbanger?
722
00:42:40,095 --> 00:42:42,063
Here.
723
00:42:42,135 --> 00:42:47,016
We can sandwich-toast to orgasms
and do our time in peace.
724
00:42:47,095 --> 00:42:49,985
Are you going to talk to SIS about Parker?
725
00:42:50,055 --> 00:42:55,778
I can't sandwich-toast to climaxes
and peace while you plot a war.
726
00:42:55,855 --> 00:42:57,584
And what happens in the meantime?
727
00:42:57,655 --> 00:43:02,502
By remaining silent, you let
this clearly dangerous woman stay here.
728
00:43:02,575 --> 00:43:05,306
How long before she hurts someone else?
729
00:43:05,375 --> 00:43:08,618
- One of your girls?
- Oh.
730
00:43:08,695 --> 00:43:13,986
You eat, and I sing like a canary. Huh?
731
00:43:16,535 --> 00:43:19,982
We abandon our principles together?
732
00:43:23,335 --> 00:43:25,497
You found her out by the greenhouse?
733
00:43:27,135 --> 00:43:30,218
What was she doin' out there?
734
00:43:30,335 --> 00:43:35,626
I do not remember taking
Lady Locksley out there.
735
00:43:35,695 --> 00:43:37,504
I do not!
736
00:43:41,935 --> 00:43:45,656
Now, it is quite possible
that she has been interfered with.
737
00:43:45,735 --> 00:43:48,864
Can you tell us where you were
at the time the incident took place?
738
00:43:48,935 --> 00:43:51,939
I don't know.
When did the incident take place?
739
00:43:52,015 --> 00:43:54,780
We're not sure. We have a window.
740
00:43:54,855 --> 00:43:57,779
How did your lock end up in the yard
by the greenhouse?
741
00:43:57,855 --> 00:43:59,983
We're not sure. We have a window.
742
00:44:00,055 --> 00:44:01,978
- Who's “we”?
- Who?
743
00:44:02,935 --> 00:44:04,425
Ms. Warren...
744
00:44:04,535 --> 00:44:07,618
you've spent your fair share
of time in Psych.
745
00:44:07,695 --> 00:44:09,697
You have a history of violent outbursts.
746
00:44:09,775 --> 00:44:13,621
The incident with inmate Waterstone
in which you broke her collarbone.
747
00:44:13,695 --> 00:44:16,938
The circumstances
behind the accident in the woodshop.
748
00:44:17,015 --> 00:44:18,540
Several assaults.
749
00:44:18,655 --> 00:44:21,465
- An episode in which you removed all
of your clothes, and you- - Uh, uh-
750
00:44:21,535 --> 00:44:24,584
My therapist says, “Yesterday is history.
751
00:44:24,655 --> 00:44:28,057
Tomorrow is a mystery.”
752
00:44:28,135 --> 00:44:31,378
We understand there's some bad blood
between Ms. Parker and Mrs. Reznikov.
753
00:44:31,455 --> 00:44:35,585
We further understand that you and
Ms. Parker have a close relationship.
754
00:44:35,655 --> 00:44:39,341
Yeah. Vee and I are close. That's right.
755
00:44:39,415 --> 00:44:41,543
Do you think she slocked Ms. Reznikov?
756
00:44:41,655 --> 00:44:45,660
No. No, no. Vee doesn't do that.
757
00:44:45,735 --> 00:44:49,945
She's the brains. I'm the muscle.
758
00:44:50,015 --> 00:44:53,576
- You're the muscle?
- You happen to flex in the greenhouse?
759
00:44:53,655 --> 00:44:56,579
- Maybe.
- Maybe? So we've gone from “no” to “maybe”?
760
00:44:56,655 --> 00:44:58,737
- No.
- No?
761
00:44:59,895 --> 00:45:02,216
- Yes.
- Yes?
762
00:45:03,615 --> 00:45:05,265
I'm feeling confused.
763
00:45:05,335 --> 00:45:07,383
Is there something you'd like to tell us?
764
00:45:07,455 --> 00:45:11,255
No. Yes. No. Yes.
765
00:45:11,335 --> 00:45:13,258
No. Y- No. Yes.
766
00:45:13,335 --> 00:45:15,303
No. Yes. No. Wait, no.
767
00:45:15,375 --> 00:45:17,662
Yes. No. Yes. No, no. Yes. No.
768
00:45:17,775 --> 00:45:19,937
No. No. No. Yes. No. No.
769
00:45:20,015 --> 00:45:22,256
No, no, no. Yes. Yes, yes.
Yes, yes, yes. No, no, no-
770
00:45:23,735 --> 00:45:25,703
You know, when I was a kid...
771
00:45:25,775 --> 00:45:28,540
I used to think that
there were people in the radio...
772
00:45:28,615 --> 00:45:31,266
like, these little itty-bitty
people that climbed in...
773
00:45:31,335 --> 00:45:35,499
and played on their mini instruments
and sang into their tiny microphones.
774
00:45:35,575 --> 00:45:39,296
That's stupid.
775
00:45:39,375 --> 00:45:42,857
I used to put scotch tape around my dolls...
776
00:45:42,935 --> 00:45:44,983
so I'd know if they moved
when I was sleeping.
777
00:45:47,855 --> 00:45:50,176
They never did.
778
00:45:50,255 --> 00:45:53,304
But I always wondered
if they were smart enough...
779
00:45:53,375 --> 00:45:56,697
to go back to their exact positions...
780
00:45:56,815 --> 00:46:01,059
and put the tape back on,
so I wouldn't know.
781
00:46:01,135 --> 00:46:02,864
Hey, did you ever see that movie?
782
00:46:02,935 --> 00:46:06,656
The- The one where there's the cowboy,
and he's like the king of the castle...
783
00:46:06,735 --> 00:46:11,502
and then this astronaut shows up,
and he tries to take over.
784
00:46:11,575 --> 00:46:13,816
And so the cowboy attempts to murder him...
785
00:46:13,895 --> 00:46:15,897
but... instead...
786
00:46:15,975 --> 00:46:20,663
the astronaut is-is taken hostage
by, like, this evil psychopath...
787
00:46:20,735 --> 00:46:23,181
and the cowboy has to rescue him.
788
00:46:23,255 --> 00:46:25,701
And then they end up
becoming really good friends.
789
00:46:25,775 --> 00:46:30,019
- Toy Story?
- Oh, my God. Toy Story. That's it. That's it.
790
00:46:30,095 --> 00:46:32,666
I love that movie. Ugh.
791
00:46:35,455 --> 00:46:38,698
You got one fucked-up perspective
on the world, kid.
792
00:46:38,815 --> 00:46:41,659
Yeah. I hear that a lot.
793
00:46:41,775 --> 00:46:44,824
I guess that's why I gotta be locked up.
794
00:46:44,895 --> 00:46:47,501
No.
795
00:46:47,615 --> 00:46:50,346
That's what makes you great.
796
00:46:53,695 --> 00:46:55,185
Thanks, Rosa.
797
00:47:05,935 --> 00:47:10,623
Medical officer report to the infirmary.
798
00:48:03,735 --> 00:48:06,386
Hey, you ever think about
Jay-Z and Beyoncé fuckin'?
799
00:48:06,455 --> 00:48:09,345
'Cause I do.
Like, more than I do myself even.
800
00:48:09,415 --> 00:48:11,816
You think that's weird?
801
00:48:11,895 --> 00:48:14,421
- Who's been in here?
- No one.
802
00:48:14,535 --> 00:48:18,824
In case math ain't your jam,
you know I got like 50 pounds on you easy.
803
00:48:26,415 --> 00:48:28,622
Who the fuck has been in here?
804
00:48:28,695 --> 00:48:32,302
I-I-I don't know, man. I don't know.
805
00:48:36,975 --> 00:48:39,182
Damn. Fuck.
806
00:49:01,055 --> 00:49:03,501
You know, she's not even a nun anymore.
807
00:49:03,575 --> 00:49:05,737
The way we see it,
she's still married to Jesus.
808
00:49:05,815 --> 00:49:07,704
We're Catholics. No divorce.
809
00:49:22,655 --> 00:49:24,657
Oh, geez.
810
00:49:26,855 --> 00:49:29,017
Whoa.
811
00:49:29,095 --> 00:49:32,417
- You look rough, Red.
- Yeah, well...
812
00:49:32,495 --> 00:49:35,624
repeated shots to the head
with a lock in a sock...
813
00:49:35,695 --> 00:49:38,266
will do that to a person.
814
00:49:38,335 --> 00:49:40,702
Thank you for coming to see me.
815
00:49:40,775 --> 00:49:44,097
Well, you asked.
816
00:49:44,175 --> 00:49:46,064
So, uh...
817
00:49:46,135 --> 00:49:50,459
SIS, uh, thinks they got it figured out.
818
00:49:50,535 --> 00:49:54,540
They're pinning everything
on Crazy Ey- on Warren.
819
00:49:54,615 --> 00:49:57,425
They got some kind of
half a confession out of her...
820
00:49:57,495 --> 00:50:00,180
and that's good enough for them.
821
00:50:00,255 --> 00:50:01,745
They want to go home.
822
00:50:01,815 --> 00:50:03,863
Red has something she wants to tell you.
823
00:50:03,935 --> 00:50:07,701
I can speak for myself.
Thank you, hungry nun.
824
00:50:14,335 --> 00:50:15,382
So?
825
00:50:16,895 --> 00:50:18,385
Healy.
826
00:50:20,535 --> 00:50:23,505
You have to bring SIS back in here.
827
00:50:23,575 --> 00:50:26,465
You've already made your statement.
828
00:50:26,535 --> 00:50:29,744
And like I said,
SIS thinks they have their gal.
829
00:50:31,055 --> 00:50:33,262
You know she didn't do it.
830
00:50:34,335 --> 00:50:37,976
I'm trying to do
the right thing here, Healy.
831
00:50:38,095 --> 00:50:41,417
- Help me.
- I-I don't know anything.
832
00:50:43,415 --> 00:50:47,420
You'd let the crazy one
take the hit for the real evil?
833
00:50:47,495 --> 00:50:49,702
Where's your fight, Healy?
834
00:50:49,815 --> 00:50:52,466
You used to care.
835
00:50:54,415 --> 00:50:57,498
Where was your conscience
when they were in here the first time?
836
00:50:57,615 --> 00:51:00,266
It was buried under
her mistrust for the system.
837
00:51:01,095 --> 00:51:02,938
But she's trying to do right.
838
00:51:06,255 --> 00:51:10,180
Yeah. Well, you know
what you get when you try around here?
839
00:51:10,295 --> 00:51:11,785
Not much.
840
00:51:14,975 --> 00:51:17,023
Have a nice day.
841
00:51:17,135 --> 00:51:18,944
You take care of yourself, okay?
842
00:51:31,135 --> 00:51:33,786
Ms. Cisneros. Hello.
843
00:51:37,775 --> 00:51:40,858
There's a chair outside in the hallway
if you'd like to wait there.
844
00:51:40,935 --> 00:51:42,824
I gotta stay. It's policy.
845
00:51:42,895 --> 00:51:44,659
I understand, of course...
846
00:51:44,735 --> 00:51:47,784
but I would appreciate
a few moments alone with my patient.
847
00:51:47,855 --> 00:51:50,335
- I'm just doin' my job.
- It's all right, Doc.
848
00:51:51,615 --> 00:51:54,300
I'm used to it.
849
00:51:54,375 --> 00:51:56,218
Fine.
850
00:51:56,295 --> 00:51:59,139
Ms. Cisneros, we've received your results-
851
00:51:59,215 --> 00:52:01,695
I'm dying. I know.
852
00:52:01,775 --> 00:52:04,984
Well, yes, that's true.
853
00:52:05,055 --> 00:52:08,582
- But-
- Look, Doc.
854
00:52:08,655 --> 00:52:11,135
I don't need any bullshit about...
855
00:52:11,215 --> 00:52:15,903
percentages or millimeters or stages.
856
00:52:18,895 --> 00:52:21,944
Do me a favor and talk to me...
857
00:52:22,015 --> 00:52:24,780
like you would if...
858
00:52:24,855 --> 00:52:27,335
I was a person you loved.
859
00:52:31,975 --> 00:52:36,060
The chemo's not working.
This cancer is aggressive.
860
00:52:43,935 --> 00:52:45,824
How long I got?
861
00:52:47,295 --> 00:52:50,060
Three to six weeks, I'd say.
862
00:52:57,015 --> 00:52:58,505
Thank you.
863
00:53:00,615 --> 00:53:02,458
You hear that, my love?
864
00:53:02,575 --> 00:53:04,976
Mommy's not goin' far away.
865
00:53:05,055 --> 00:53:06,705
She's staying right here.
866
00:53:06,775 --> 00:53:10,177
So we can see her-
867
00:53:10,255 --> 00:53:12,417
kiss her...
868
00:53:12,495 --> 00:53:15,066
and tell her all about how our day was.
869
00:53:15,135 --> 00:53:18,059
And how we read that book Fraidyzoo-
870
00:53:18,135 --> 00:53:20,024
And how your diaper
leaked all over Daddy's pants.
871
00:53:21,775 --> 00:53:23,425
That's right.
872
00:53:23,495 --> 00:53:25,543
We're very excited. Right, baby?
873
00:53:25,615 --> 00:53:28,824
We are so excited.
874
00:53:28,935 --> 00:53:31,905
Aren't we?
875
00:53:31,975 --> 00:53:33,465
Yeah.
876
00:53:33,535 --> 00:53:35,776
Do you hate us?
877
00:53:35,855 --> 00:53:38,984
Please tell us you don't hate us,
because you're still my best friend...
878
00:53:39,055 --> 00:53:41,581
and I don't have a lot of women friends.
879
00:53:41,695 --> 00:53:43,459
And I love you, and I can't imagine...
880
00:53:43,535 --> 00:53:45,617
a world where you're not my friend.
881
00:53:46,895 --> 00:53:49,466
We want your blessing.
882
00:53:49,535 --> 00:53:51,299
You're kidding me, right?
883
00:53:51,415 --> 00:53:53,258
You did cheat on me.
884
00:53:53,375 --> 00:53:55,503
That doesn't mean
I don't get to have feelings.
885
00:53:55,575 --> 00:53:58,181
If only my nipples smelled like marzipan.
886
00:53:58,295 --> 00:54:00,946
You told him that?
887
00:54:01,015 --> 00:54:05,976
Oh, Jesus, Pol- He didn't need to know
what Alex's nipples smelled like.
888
00:54:06,095 --> 00:54:09,463
It weirdly made him feel better
for a minute.
889
00:54:09,535 --> 00:54:11,822
Fuck you.
890
00:54:11,935 --> 00:54:13,425
Fuck both of you.
891
00:54:14,495 --> 00:54:16,338
You're right. She's right.
892
00:54:17,895 --> 00:54:19,659
This is so insane. I'm so sorry.
893
00:54:19,775 --> 00:54:21,982
- We shouldn't have come.
- No. No.
894
00:54:22,055 --> 00:54:25,423
We talked about this. It makes sense.
895
00:54:29,975 --> 00:54:32,785
- Pipes-
- Stop it.
896
00:54:34,055 --> 00:54:36,183
Fine.
897
00:54:36,255 --> 00:54:39,179
But let's be realistic about this.
898
00:54:41,055 --> 00:54:43,740
We both have known you a really long time.
899
00:54:43,815 --> 00:54:47,661
I-It's not like you're suddenly
gonna disappear out of our lives.
900
00:54:47,735 --> 00:54:51,262
That's- That's not what we want, at least.
901
00:54:51,335 --> 00:54:54,782
“We”? Oh, God.
902
00:54:54,895 --> 00:54:56,624
Oh, God. Gross.
903
00:54:56,695 --> 00:54:58,857
Can we be adults about this, please?
904
00:54:58,935 --> 00:55:00,619
Sure.
905
00:55:00,735 --> 00:55:02,225
Okay.
906
00:55:03,575 --> 00:55:05,418
Let's be adults.
907
00:55:05,495 --> 00:55:07,657
Let's get this all out on the table...
908
00:55:07,735 --> 00:55:09,783
just so that we're clear, okay?
909
00:55:09,855 --> 00:55:11,539
The first person...
910
00:55:11,615 --> 00:55:14,095
that you fuck...
911
00:55:14,175 --> 00:55:16,416
after we break up...
912
00:55:16,495 --> 00:55:18,338
is my best friend-
913
00:55:18,415 --> 00:55:22,739
my married best friend.
914
00:55:24,295 --> 00:55:27,902
And you- you have a newborn.
915
00:55:30,055 --> 00:55:32,422
I mean, was your vagina
even fuckable at that point...
916
00:55:32,495 --> 00:55:35,419
or were you just squirting
your milk all over him?
917
00:55:35,495 --> 00:55:37,975
And then you did the worst thing.
918
00:55:38,055 --> 00:55:39,466
You decided...
919
00:55:39,535 --> 00:55:41,902
to fall in love.
920
00:55:41,975 --> 00:55:45,900
And then you thought,
“You know what would be a great idea?
921
00:55:45,975 --> 00:55:49,900
Let's go visit Piper in prison-
922
00:55:49,975 --> 00:55:51,818
because that's where she lives-
923
00:55:51,895 --> 00:55:55,502
because things are going so great for her.
924
00:55:55,575 --> 00:55:58,499
And let's sit across from her...
925
00:55:58,575 --> 00:56:01,055
and ask for her blessing...
926
00:56:01,135 --> 00:56:04,139
so that we can walk away feeling absolved...
927
00:56:04,255 --> 00:56:08,305
of all of the fucked-up choices
that we have made.”
928
00:56:09,455 --> 00:56:11,139
You're right.
929
00:56:11,215 --> 00:56:12,819
It's fucked up.
930
00:56:12,895 --> 00:56:16,422
I know that. Larry knows that.
931
00:56:16,495 --> 00:56:19,578
But we didn't decide
to love each other, Piper.
932
00:56:19,655 --> 00:56:23,455
It just happened, the way love does.
933
00:56:29,055 --> 00:56:32,264
And my vagina bounced back really fast.
934
00:56:42,695 --> 00:56:44,857
Hey, Mr. Healy.
935
00:56:44,935 --> 00:56:46,266
Hi.
936
00:56:47,215 --> 00:56:49,297
What do you think?
937
00:56:49,375 --> 00:56:51,264
I prefer long hair.
938
00:56:51,335 --> 00:56:54,737
Hey. But it's counterculture.
939
00:56:54,815 --> 00:56:57,295
- Do you even know what that means?
- Not really.
940
00:56:59,375 --> 00:57:00,979
But I don't really think it matters...
941
00:57:01,055 --> 00:57:04,218
as long as you say your opinion
louder than everybody else's.
942
00:57:04,295 --> 00:57:05,820
- Have a good one, Doggett.
- Hold on.
943
00:57:05,895 --> 00:57:08,136
- Hey.
- Wait. I want to talk to you.
944
00:57:08,215 --> 00:57:12,265
I want to do a make-up class for Safe Place.
I have a lot of free time this week.
945
00:57:12,335 --> 00:57:14,622
You seemed to be pretty busy yesterday.
946
00:57:14,695 --> 00:57:16,697
Is that why you're all sourpussed?
947
00:57:16,775 --> 00:57:20,097
You sad 'cause I have
another friend besides you?
948
00:57:20,175 --> 00:57:24,021
- I thought we had the same values.
- We do have the same values.
949
00:57:24,095 --> 00:57:28,339
We like to express ourselves,
and we like to be kind to people, right?
950
00:57:28,415 --> 00:57:32,739
I mean, because of you,
Mr. Healy, I made a new friend...
951
00:57:32,815 --> 00:57:36,706
somebody that I would have
never talked to, and you know it.
952
00:57:36,775 --> 00:57:40,222
I mean, now, is that somethin' else or what?
953
00:57:40,295 --> 00:57:44,186
Touch me again, and we're gonna have
a problem. Do you understand?
954
00:57:44,255 --> 00:57:47,577
All right, listen.
You don't got to talk, okay?
955
00:57:47,655 --> 00:57:51,660
I know you got issues with the butchies,
and you're not that far off the mark.
956
00:57:51,735 --> 00:57:55,023
And I know you're pissed off at me
that I didn't make it to group.
957
00:57:55,095 --> 00:57:57,143
Sorry, but I want you to know something.
958
00:57:57,975 --> 00:58:00,376
I am forever grateful to you...
959
00:58:02,095 --> 00:58:06,180
'cause you're the only person...
in my whole life that's...
960
00:58:08,295 --> 00:58:11,697
ever taken the time to talk to me.
961
00:58:11,775 --> 00:58:16,656
And it just seems like you're really good
at what you do and that you really care.
962
00:58:18,455 --> 00:58:22,938
And I will never finger her,
and I will never let her finger me.
963
00:58:41,495 --> 00:58:44,624
This is all part of making the evil go away.
964
00:58:50,895 --> 00:58:52,420
Okay?
965
00:59:11,015 --> 00:59:13,177
And the final step.
966
00:59:34,095 --> 00:59:37,577
Hey.
967
00:59:37,655 --> 00:59:39,464
Why don't you tell me what happened?
968
00:59:40,575 --> 00:59:42,464
I hit her...
969
00:59:42,535 --> 00:59:44,378
and hit her...
970
00:59:44,455 --> 00:59:46,344
and hit her.
971
00:59:48,215 --> 00:59:51,503
- Why did you do that?
- I don't remember.
972
00:59:52,815 --> 00:59:56,422
You don't remember doing it
or you don't remember why?
973
00:59:56,495 --> 00:59:58,975
I don't remember.
974
01:00:03,095 --> 01:00:07,066
- Did you attack Red?
- Vee said I did.
975
01:00:07,135 --> 01:00:09,342
Those men who were here said I did.
976
01:00:09,415 --> 01:00:11,986
- Shouldn't I believe 'em?
- No.
977
01:00:12,055 --> 01:00:16,105
- You should know what you did.
- I can't remember!
978
01:00:17,575 --> 01:00:21,580
Now, I thought I was mopping
in the warehouse.
979
01:00:21,655 --> 01:00:23,703
Turns out I was slocking in the greenhouse.
980
01:00:23,775 --> 01:00:27,416
I mean, you know, I must- must have
mixed up “ware” and “green”...
981
01:00:27,495 --> 01:00:29,304
or-or-or-or “mop” and “slock.”
982
01:00:29,375 --> 01:00:32,424
That could happen.
983
01:00:32,495 --> 01:00:34,543
- Right?
- It's very unlikely.
984
01:00:34,615 --> 01:00:36,458
Yes.
985
01:00:37,495 --> 01:00:40,339
- But who can I trust?
- Yourself.
986
01:00:42,175 --> 01:00:46,783
No.
987
01:00:46,855 --> 01:00:48,539
No.
988
01:00:50,655 --> 01:00:52,145
I'm unreliable.
989
01:00:57,415 --> 01:00:59,065
Is Red gonna be okay?
990
01:01:00,895 --> 01:01:03,296
I always liked her.
991
01:01:03,375 --> 01:01:07,221
And she's... scary, but...
992
01:01:07,295 --> 01:01:10,822
her hair is like the Heat Miser
in that Christmas special.
993
01:01:10,935 --> 01:01:14,860
Don't you think?
994
01:01:14,935 --> 01:01:18,826
She's, uh, Mrs. Green Christmas.
995
01:01:18,895 --> 01:01:20,784
She's Mrs. Sun.
996
01:01:23,655 --> 01:01:25,145
Yeah.
997
01:01:27,895 --> 01:01:29,545
So-
998
01:01:31,535 --> 01:01:33,981
what's...
999
01:01:34,055 --> 01:01:36,899
gonna happen to me now?
1000
01:01:43,295 --> 01:01:45,263
Oh. Good.
1001
01:01:45,335 --> 01:01:47,258
You're packin' up.
1002
01:01:47,335 --> 01:01:50,942
I just got word that I am officially
taking over your job.
1003
01:01:53,415 --> 01:01:56,419
Permanently or interim
till they find someone real?
1004
01:01:56,495 --> 01:01:58,577
He's giving you a trial run, isn't he?
1005
01:01:58,655 --> 01:02:00,862
What is it, 48 hours? Seventy-two?
1006
01:02:00,935 --> 01:02:03,745
Can you not fuck up for a few days?
There's a real challenge.
1007
01:02:03,815 --> 01:02:05,579
Meanwhile...
1008
01:02:05,655 --> 01:02:09,341
your... shapely ass is canned...
1009
01:02:09,455 --> 01:02:11,264
while mine is sitting in that chair.
1010
01:02:11,335 --> 01:02:14,145
I wasn't canned. I resigned.
1011
01:02:14,215 --> 01:02:16,502
I am leaving with a commendation
from the warden...
1012
01:02:16,575 --> 01:02:19,055
about my dedicated service
to this institution...
1013
01:02:19,135 --> 01:02:23,140
and a press release about
how sad he is that I have decided...
1014
01:02:23,215 --> 01:02:27,823
to devote myself to politics
and possibly motherhood full-time.
1015
01:02:27,895 --> 01:02:29,977
How the fuck do you do that?
1016
01:02:30,055 --> 01:02:32,820
How do you keep gettin' away with shit?
1017
01:02:32,935 --> 01:02:34,619
I'm not getting away with anything.
1018
01:02:34,695 --> 01:02:38,017
The warden is simply smart enough to realize
he doesn't want a scandal on his hands...
1019
01:02:38,095 --> 01:02:41,463
and he doesn't want to make
a political enemy of my husband.
1020
01:02:42,255 --> 01:02:43,780
Your gay husband?
1021
01:02:45,975 --> 01:02:49,138
- Your band sucks.
- Your blow jobs suck.
1022
01:02:52,055 --> 01:02:54,740
I was good at my job, Joe.
1023
01:02:54,815 --> 01:02:57,056
It was complicated, but I made it work.
1024
01:02:57,135 --> 01:02:59,786
Let's see how you do.
1025
01:02:59,855 --> 01:03:04,019
Well, I figure, for starters,
if I simply don't embezzle...
1026
01:03:04,095 --> 01:03:05,824
and lie and neglect-
1027
01:03:05,895 --> 01:03:07,977
Oh, save it. I'm tired.
1028
01:03:08,095 --> 01:03:11,178
And I'm leaving.
Good luck with your noble intentions.
1029
01:03:11,255 --> 01:03:13,940
This place'll beat 'em out of you quick.
1030
01:03:26,215 --> 01:03:30,186
Well, Amanda has a theory that
it's all because of the cycle of poverty...
1031
01:03:30,255 --> 01:03:33,338
and the bad schools and the government
cheese and because I'm brown-
1032
01:03:33,455 --> 01:03:35,537
and my mom was on crack.
1033
01:03:35,615 --> 01:03:40,098
But I think it's because...
I was just being an asshole.
1034
01:03:40,175 --> 01:03:42,746
Ah. I thought you said no mushy shit.
1035
01:03:42,815 --> 01:03:46,615
I'm sorry, P. I really am.
1036
01:03:46,695 --> 01:03:48,538
Yeah, well...
1037
01:03:48,615 --> 01:03:51,937
McKenzie thinks it's repressed frustration
'cause you ain't never been to Paris.
1038
01:03:52,055 --> 01:03:54,376
It's probably that too.
1039
01:03:54,455 --> 01:03:56,378
Oh, shit.
1040
01:03:56,455 --> 01:03:59,186
- Outlander. You ever read this?
- No.
1041
01:03:59,255 --> 01:04:01,826
Lady travels back in time to Scotland
and some shit...
1042
01:04:01,895 --> 01:04:04,739
hooks up with this big, sexy outlaw type...
1043
01:04:04,815 --> 01:04:08,183
- and they be getting it day in and day out, yo.
- Stop.
1044
01:04:08,255 --> 01:04:09,620
It's hot!
1045
01:04:09,695 --> 01:04:14,098
But the dude's, like,
pale with red hair- not my thing.
1046
01:04:14,175 --> 01:04:15,904
But if I go back in time...
1047
01:04:15,975 --> 01:04:18,057
I go back to Africa.
1048
01:04:18,135 --> 01:04:21,981
I find me a Nubian king,
with a Nubian thing.
1049
01:04:23,615 --> 01:04:25,822
Ha!
1050
01:04:25,895 --> 01:04:29,024
Yo, look, when I was a kid, my parents
rented that movie Back to the Future.
1051
01:04:29,135 --> 01:04:32,378
I was mad convinced,
so, like, every time I left the house...
1052
01:04:32,455 --> 01:04:35,823
my backpack was full of stuff
just in case I went back in time.
1053
01:04:35,895 --> 01:04:38,421
I was all ready for my DeLorean.
1054
01:04:38,495 --> 01:04:42,420
- But it never came.
- Girl.
1055
01:04:43,415 --> 01:04:46,544
- Yo, P.
- The fuck do y'all want, man?
1056
01:04:46,615 --> 01:04:48,140
Chill, you fuckin' book ninja.
1057
01:04:48,215 --> 01:04:50,024
- We come in peace.
- For real.
1058
01:04:50,095 --> 01:04:51,620
This shit's gone too far.
1059
01:04:51,695 --> 01:04:54,301
Yeah, well, it took you
fuckin' long enough to notice.
1060
01:04:54,375 --> 01:04:56,343
That bitch went crazy on my ass.
1061
01:04:56,455 --> 01:04:58,423
“Where's my shit? Where's my shit?”
1062
01:04:58,495 --> 01:04:59,906
She cracked wide open.
1063
01:04:59,975 --> 01:05:01,943
Wait. What shit?
1064
01:05:02,015 --> 01:05:03,540
- Her shit shit?
- Mm-hmm.
1065
01:05:03,615 --> 01:05:06,937
- Oh, shit!
- Went missing. Yeah.
1066
01:05:07,015 --> 01:05:09,097
She's out of her mind.
1067
01:05:09,215 --> 01:05:10,899
Guessing she'll be comin' after y'all next.
1068
01:05:10,975 --> 01:05:14,866
- Yo, but we ain't got her shit.
- She talkin' about takin' everybody out for it.
1069
01:05:14,935 --> 01:05:17,063
Look, I don't care if y'all got it or not.
1070
01:05:17,135 --> 01:05:21,538
I just wanna know I'm not gettin' slocked
in my bed or shanked on the dooker.
1071
01:05:21,615 --> 01:05:25,540
Yo, if she's suspecting y'all, then that
means she ain't got no people no more-
1072
01:05:25,615 --> 01:05:27,105
except Crazy Eyes.
1073
01:05:27,175 --> 01:05:30,702
Mm-mmm. Crazy Eyes be out with SIS
takin' the fall for doin' Red.
1074
01:05:30,775 --> 01:05:34,143
Look, Vee got that noodle brain
convinced she did it.
1075
01:05:34,215 --> 01:05:36,104
We kind of helped with that too.
1076
01:05:36,175 --> 01:05:38,337
I hope you right with your God
with that one.
1077
01:05:38,455 --> 01:05:41,106
Hey, don't make us try and feel badder
than we already do.
1078
01:05:41,175 --> 01:05:44,861
Y'all was with Vee too.
Y'all was doin' sketchy shit too.
1079
01:05:46,615 --> 01:05:49,346
She must really be losing it
over them drugs, huh?
1080
01:05:49,415 --> 01:05:52,021
- Lost it.
- Yo, maybe we can make this right.
1081
01:05:54,415 --> 01:05:57,419
I mean, Vee got no one. We all talkin'.
1082
01:05:57,495 --> 01:05:59,702
- So we jump her? Pow, pow, pow?
- Yo, don't.
1083
01:05:59,775 --> 01:06:02,016
- I'm in.
- No.
1084
01:06:02,095 --> 01:06:04,416
I don't think we need to do all that.
1085
01:06:05,815 --> 01:06:07,863
Okay.
1086
01:06:07,935 --> 01:06:09,858
I made an effort.
1087
01:06:13,095 --> 01:06:16,099
It's your turn.
1088
01:06:18,135 --> 01:06:21,457
- Eat something.
- Uh-
1089
01:06:24,695 --> 01:06:26,538
- Fine.
-Hmm.
1090
01:06:34,775 --> 01:06:36,459
Mmm.
1091
01:06:38,775 --> 01:06:42,746
- Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.
- Mm-hmm.
1092
01:06:42,815 --> 01:06:44,101
Mmm.
1093
01:06:47,375 --> 01:06:48,945
All right.
1094
01:06:53,535 --> 01:06:56,584
Okay, Sister. I've stopped your transfer.
1095
01:06:58,415 --> 01:07:00,895
- I was being transferred?
- That's right.
1096
01:07:00,975 --> 01:07:02,704
You, Chapman and a bunch of others.
1097
01:07:02,775 --> 01:07:04,777
Fig was having you all sent to Virginia.
1098
01:07:04,855 --> 01:07:07,904
I just took care of it.
You're all stayin' here.
1099
01:07:10,415 --> 01:07:12,782
- Aren't you glad?
- Well, it-
1100
01:07:12,855 --> 01:07:16,337
it's hard to be emotionally invested in
something I didn't know was happening.
1101
01:07:16,415 --> 01:07:19,703
But, yes, I- I suppose that's good news.
1102
01:07:19,775 --> 01:07:21,504
Good.
1103
01:07:21,575 --> 01:07:25,739
I've done you a solid.
Now would you do somethin' for me?
1104
01:07:27,335 --> 01:07:30,942
- Eat somethin'.
- Don't eat a thing, Ingalls.
1105
01:07:31,015 --> 01:07:34,098
- Fight the power.
- Red, you're not helping.
1106
01:07:38,055 --> 01:07:39,216
Look.
1107
01:07:43,015 --> 01:07:46,303
Fig is out. I'm in.
1108
01:07:46,415 --> 01:07:48,622
Give me a win here.
1109
01:07:48,695 --> 01:07:53,383
Let me show the administration
I can handle situations.
1110
01:07:53,455 --> 01:07:56,220
I want to make a difference, Sister.
1111
01:07:56,295 --> 01:07:57,740
Would you do that for me?
1112
01:07:57,815 --> 01:08:00,261
Here.
1113
01:08:02,655 --> 01:08:04,498
I brought you a muffin.
1114
01:08:06,335 --> 01:08:08,906
Go ahead.
1115
01:08:08,975 --> 01:08:11,137
Go ahead. Take a bite.
1116
01:08:11,215 --> 01:08:13,821
We'll call it a day.
1117
01:08:20,255 --> 01:08:21,905
Come on.
1118
01:08:27,015 --> 01:08:29,302
Excellent. All right.
1119
01:08:29,415 --> 01:08:31,179
That a girl.
1120
01:08:33,895 --> 01:08:36,023
Now, would you mind callin' off your nuns?
1121
01:08:38,655 --> 01:08:41,306
- Sergeant Miller
to the library. - Luschek.
1122
01:08:41,375 --> 01:08:43,901
I need to ask you somethin'.
1123
01:08:44,015 --> 01:08:46,336
- You can buy it on the Internet.
- What?
1124
01:08:48,575 --> 01:08:50,339
Whatever you're lookin' for.
1125
01:08:50,415 --> 01:08:53,339
I guess I could help you
with what words to type in.
1126
01:08:53,415 --> 01:08:55,736
Do I want to know that much about you?
1127
01:08:55,815 --> 01:08:58,421
What the fuck are you talkin' about?
1128
01:08:58,495 --> 01:09:00,657
I need to ask you about Warren.
1129
01:09:00,735 --> 01:09:03,261
- Who?
- Crazy Eyes.
1130
01:09:03,335 --> 01:09:06,339
Oh.
1131
01:09:06,455 --> 01:09:10,141
You might have seen her in electrical
around the time Red got slocked.
1132
01:09:10,215 --> 01:09:13,378
Cleanin' up, sweepin' the floor,
somethin' like that.
1133
01:09:15,335 --> 01:09:18,703
I, uh- I might have.
1134
01:09:19,615 --> 01:09:22,300
Well, that's great.
1135
01:09:22,375 --> 01:09:24,503
I need an interdepartmental
work order showing...
1136
01:09:24,575 --> 01:09:26,896
the specific time that she reported to you.
1137
01:09:27,535 --> 01:09:29,378
And, uh...
1138
01:09:29,455 --> 01:09:32,777
you would owe me a big one
for lyin' for ya, right?
1139
01:09:32,895 --> 01:09:35,819
You know, somethin' to be
determined at a later date?
1140
01:09:35,895 --> 01:09:38,136
Sure.
1141
01:09:38,215 --> 01:09:40,024
Fine.
1142
01:09:42,135 --> 01:09:44,456
Here's the form.
1143
01:09:44,575 --> 01:09:49,137
Oh!
This is gonna be fun.
1144
01:09:49,215 --> 01:09:50,740
Turn around.
1145
01:09:54,735 --> 01:09:56,419
Thanks, Luschek.
1146
01:10:00,855 --> 01:10:02,983
Hey, Taystee.
1147
01:10:03,055 --> 01:10:04,705
How's my girl?
1148
01:10:04,775 --> 01:10:06,584
Who? Me?
1149
01:10:06,655 --> 01:10:08,862
Come on, now.
1150
01:10:08,975 --> 01:10:12,422
I had to teach you a little lesson,
but the time-out is over.
1151
01:10:12,495 --> 01:10:14,941
Come on back. Play with Mama.
1152
01:10:15,015 --> 01:10:17,621
I think I'll... stay in the corner.
1153
01:10:17,695 --> 01:10:19,459
And while you're in that corner,
look around.
1154
01:10:19,535 --> 01:10:24,143
You wouldn't happen to be hiding a big box
of something that's not yours, would you?
1155
01:10:24,215 --> 01:10:26,786
- I didn't take your shit!
- But you know who did.
1156
01:10:26,855 --> 01:10:29,062
Hey, guys.
1157
01:10:29,135 --> 01:10:30,864
What's going on?
1158
01:10:32,935 --> 01:10:35,825
This... does not concern you.
1159
01:10:39,495 --> 01:10:41,736
Taystee, we've been together long enough.
1160
01:10:41,815 --> 01:10:43,863
I don't have to remind you...
1161
01:10:43,935 --> 01:10:47,781
what happens when someone oversteps.
1162
01:10:52,175 --> 01:10:54,496
You mean like R.J.?
1163
01:10:55,495 --> 01:10:58,817
Yes. Like R.J.
1164
01:11:03,055 --> 01:11:05,057
You'd be 10 years dead now.
1165
01:11:05,135 --> 01:11:08,059
You'd be just another
anonymous black child...
1166
01:11:08,135 --> 01:11:10,979
buried six deep in a county field.
1167
01:11:13,215 --> 01:11:15,900
Here's the thing about mamas.
1168
01:11:15,975 --> 01:11:19,058
They're only mamas as long as they got kids.
1169
01:11:19,135 --> 01:11:22,025
- Without them, what are they?
- Uh, nothin'.
1170
01:11:22,095 --> 01:11:23,256
Mmm.
1171
01:11:23,335 --> 01:11:26,737
You got to have people, especially in here.
1172
01:11:26,815 --> 01:11:28,340
You just got to.
1173
01:11:28,415 --> 01:11:32,704
Otherwise, you find yourself vulnerable
to all sorts of shit.
1174
01:11:32,775 --> 01:11:34,425
Mm-hmm.
1175
01:11:34,495 --> 01:11:36,338
Lots of locks.
1176
01:11:36,935 --> 01:11:38,744
Lots of socks.
1177
01:11:41,575 --> 01:11:43,703
You turnin' me out?
1178
01:11:45,695 --> 01:11:47,902
Fuck you.
1179
01:11:49,135 --> 01:11:52,105
You think I can't survive?
1180
01:11:52,175 --> 01:11:55,622
I will find a new family.
1181
01:11:55,695 --> 01:11:57,618
Of course you will.
1182
01:11:57,695 --> 01:12:00,141
As long as there's psychos like you...
1183
01:12:00,215 --> 01:12:03,059
- there's always people willing to follow 'em.
- Yeah.
1184
01:12:03,135 --> 01:12:05,945
- I'm sure you'll find all sorts of
new suckers over in max. - Mm-hmm.
1185
01:12:06,015 --> 01:12:07,619
Yeah.
1186
01:12:07,695 --> 01:12:10,619
See, we feel real bad about Suzanne.
1187
01:12:10,695 --> 01:12:12,504
So we about to- What's that word?
1188
01:12:12,575 --> 01:12:15,226
- Recant.
- Yeah.
1189
01:12:15,295 --> 01:12:17,536
We 'bout to recant our shit.
1190
01:12:17,615 --> 01:12:20,903
Yeah, you know who made up
that “never snitch” bullshit?
1191
01:12:20,975 --> 01:12:24,536
- Mm-mmm. - People who probably
deserve to be snitched on.
1192
01:12:25,775 --> 01:12:27,265
Taystee.
1193
01:12:29,935 --> 01:12:31,425
My Taystee girl.
1194
01:12:39,855 --> 01:12:41,778
You break my heart.
1195
01:12:44,775 --> 01:12:46,982
Might be true...
1196
01:12:47,055 --> 01:12:48,580
if you had one.
1197
01:12:48,655 --> 01:12:52,421
Oh!
1198
01:13:10,855 --> 01:13:13,426
Hey, you- you know what I was thinkin'?
1199
01:13:13,535 --> 01:13:15,742
You ever seen Toy Story 2?
1200
01:13:15,815 --> 01:13:19,103
You know, it's hard to believe,
but it's better than the first one.
1201
01:13:19,175 --> 01:13:24,136
Even though sequels never are,
this- this is the exception to the rule.
1202
01:13:24,215 --> 01:13:27,742
So, I was thinkin', maybe we could
get them to play it next week.
1203
01:13:27,815 --> 01:13:29,897
Wouldn't that be good? Huh?
1204
01:13:29,975 --> 01:13:32,342
She's done.
1205
01:13:32,415 --> 01:13:34,144
Done done.
1206
01:13:35,535 --> 01:13:37,219
Only has a few more weeks.
1207
01:13:37,295 --> 01:13:39,218
That's what the doc said.
1208
01:13:40,455 --> 01:13:43,584
Man. It's real fucked up
to die in prison, right?
1209
01:13:44,975 --> 01:13:47,455
I mean, you know,
it's fucked up to die period...
1210
01:13:47,535 --> 01:13:50,459
but this is really, I mean-
1211
01:13:51,975 --> 01:13:53,659
It's fucked up, man.
1212
01:14:20,535 --> 01:14:23,937
- Chapman.
- Yeah?
1213
01:14:24,015 --> 01:14:26,177
You were right, you know?
1214
01:14:26,255 --> 01:14:28,462
What you said to me when I first got here.
1215
01:14:28,535 --> 01:14:29,980
What did I say?
1216
01:14:30,055 --> 01:14:32,581
You told me to find a wife...
1217
01:14:32,695 --> 01:14:35,346
someone to look out for me.
1218
01:14:35,415 --> 01:14:39,261
- I should have listened.
- Yeah. I was fucking with you.
1219
01:14:39,335 --> 01:14:41,463
I know.
1220
01:14:41,535 --> 01:14:43,025
But you were right.
1221
01:14:45,935 --> 01:14:48,541
God, this is the loneliest place
I've ever been...
1222
01:14:48,615 --> 01:14:51,778
and I lived alone in a tree
for eight months.
1223
01:14:51,855 --> 01:14:53,778
Yeah. You're pretty much
on your own in here.
1224
01:14:53,855 --> 01:14:55,380
It sucks.
1225
01:14:56,455 --> 01:14:58,696
And no one understands.
1226
01:14:58,775 --> 01:15:02,302
Like, Meadow asked if she could
send me a care package.
1227
01:15:02,375 --> 01:15:04,901
She thinks this is camp.
1228
01:15:04,975 --> 01:15:08,980
But it's not. It's... awful.
1229
01:15:12,175 --> 01:15:15,145
I don't think I'm gonna be the same
when I get out.
1230
01:15:17,015 --> 01:15:18,779
Maybe that's okay.
1231
01:15:18,855 --> 01:15:21,540
It's not fucking okay.
1232
01:15:24,415 --> 01:15:26,622
I know.
1233
01:15:36,695 --> 01:15:38,504
Ms. Warren.
1234
01:15:38,575 --> 01:15:40,942
Ms. Warren!
1235
01:15:41,055 --> 01:15:44,423
The authorities will be here soon
to transfer you to another facility...
1236
01:15:44,495 --> 01:15:48,022
- to await trial on this charge.
-Mmm.
1237
01:15:48,095 --> 01:15:50,496
- Thank you for your cooperation.
- Oh!
1238
01:15:50,575 --> 01:15:55,137
We say “thank you,” we say “please”
and “excuse me” when we sneeze.
1239
01:15:55,215 --> 01:15:57,343
That's the way we do what's right.
1240
01:15:57,415 --> 01:15:59,986
We have manners. We're polite!
1241
01:16:08,855 --> 01:16:10,380
What?
1242
01:16:10,455 --> 01:16:12,617
You want to go home or not? Huh?
1243
01:16:12,695 --> 01:16:14,902
I'm supposed to meet Cheryl
at the White Horse tonight.
1244
01:16:20,935 --> 01:16:22,460
Fine.
1245
01:16:22,535 --> 01:16:24,458
Good day, sir.
1246
01:16:24,535 --> 01:16:26,185
I say, good day.
1247
01:16:26,255 --> 01:16:28,701
Thank you very much. Thank you very much.
1248
01:16:28,775 --> 01:16:31,346
No, thank you very much.
No, thank you very much.
1249
01:16:31,415 --> 01:16:33,417
Thank you very, very much.
Thank you very much.
1250
01:16:33,495 --> 01:16:35,224
Thank you so much.
1251
01:16:35,295 --> 01:16:37,104
Excuse me. I need to recant my testimony.
1252
01:16:37,175 --> 01:16:39,337
- Hey, hey, I got new information.
It was Vee Parker. - Yes.
1253
01:16:39,415 --> 01:16:41,383
- Vee Parker did it.
- Yo, you gotta believe us.
1254
01:16:41,455 --> 01:16:45,016
It might have seemed like it was Crazy Eyes
'cause that bitch is crazy, but it was not her.
1255
01:16:45,095 --> 01:16:47,575
- Yeah. Justice is not being served, okay?
- Ladies, I'm sorry.
1256
01:16:47,655 --> 01:16:49,145
- We're done for the day.
- No!
1257
01:16:49,215 --> 01:16:51,582
Where is security?
Is there a CO around here?
1258
01:16:51,655 --> 01:16:54,579
Ladies, I strongly suggest
you clear this hallway now.
1259
01:16:54,655 --> 01:16:56,657
- It was Vee Parker!
- Hold up.
1260
01:16:56,735 --> 01:16:59,944
- Hold up. - Oh, good. Mr. Healy,
please control your inmates.
1261
01:17:00,015 --> 01:17:01,824
Control? We don't need control.
1262
01:17:01,895 --> 01:17:04,660
I have a work order here.
1263
01:17:04,735 --> 01:17:08,262
There's no way Warren could have done it.
She was in electrical.
1264
01:17:08,335 --> 01:17:10,906
You gotta let her go.
The case is still open.
1265
01:17:12,695 --> 01:17:13,696
Shit.
1266
01:17:15,815 --> 01:17:17,340
You should call Cheryl.
1267
01:17:17,415 --> 01:17:18,905
Yeah, you should call Cheryl.
1268
01:17:18,975 --> 01:17:21,216
“Honey, I'm gonna be home late.”
1269
01:17:25,495 --> 01:17:26,985
Jesus.
1270
01:17:29,855 --> 01:17:31,823
Come in.
1271
01:17:33,975 --> 01:17:36,455
Welcome, John.
1272
01:17:36,535 --> 01:17:38,776
Huh?
1273
01:17:38,855 --> 01:17:43,736
- You like my new office?
- Yeah. It's, uh- It's very nice.
1274
01:17:45,775 --> 01:17:48,221
Look, uh, Mr. Caputo.
1275
01:17:49,815 --> 01:17:54,025
I can't be a pussy anymore.
I have to... stand up and be a man.
1276
01:17:54,095 --> 01:17:57,542
Oh, no. Don't. Please don't tell me
you busted up another dorm.
1277
01:17:57,615 --> 01:17:59,060
- I can't-
- Daya's baby's mine.
1278
01:18:00,855 --> 01:18:02,539
The baby's mine.
1279
01:18:03,695 --> 01:18:05,902
I got her pregnant, and, uh, she got scared.
1280
01:18:05,975 --> 01:18:08,979
So she had sex with Mendez
so that I wouldn't get blamed.
1281
01:18:09,055 --> 01:18:11,581
But... I have to step up.
1282
01:18:11,655 --> 01:18:13,384
It's, uh- It's my child.
1283
01:18:13,455 --> 01:18:15,059
- Stop talking.
- It's my child. It's my baby.
1284
01:18:15,135 --> 01:18:17,183
I said stop talking.
1285
01:18:24,255 --> 01:18:27,099
Jesus tits!
1286
01:18:29,095 --> 01:18:30,585
It's my second day.
1287
01:18:31,495 --> 01:18:33,497
I can't-
1288
01:18:33,575 --> 01:18:35,703
I can't- I can't have this.
1289
01:18:38,255 --> 01:18:39,780
No.
1290
01:18:41,375 --> 01:18:43,537
- This has been dealt with.
- But the baby's mine.
1291
01:18:43,655 --> 01:18:47,023
- Mendez is being prosecuted.
- 'Cause Mendez fucked her.
1292
01:18:47,095 --> 01:18:49,177
- So did I!
- No.
1293
01:18:49,255 --> 01:18:51,826
- You didn't.
- Sir, I- I fucked her.
1294
01:18:51,895 --> 01:18:53,624
You love this girl, Bennett?
1295
01:18:56,895 --> 01:18:58,943
I do.
1296
01:18:59,015 --> 01:19:01,495
Then I suggest you keep your mouth shut...
1297
01:19:01,575 --> 01:19:03,498
or I will send your love...
1298
01:19:03,575 --> 01:19:05,816
the town pump of Litchfield...
1299
01:19:05,895 --> 01:19:09,024
to a max facility where
she will spend her days in a cage...
1300
01:19:09,095 --> 01:19:12,258
away from you and her mother
and her friends...
1301
01:19:12,335 --> 01:19:16,306
until she delivers your child
with her hands and feet cuffed to a bed.
1302
01:19:20,615 --> 01:19:22,424
What do you want, Bennett?
1303
01:19:24,935 --> 01:19:26,425
Nothing, sir.
1304
01:19:27,695 --> 01:19:29,185
Good.
1305
01:19:33,895 --> 01:19:35,818
It's my second day.
1306
01:19:38,215 --> 01:19:41,617
My second fucking day.
1307
01:19:41,695 --> 01:19:43,220
Get out of here.
1308
01:19:45,815 --> 01:19:47,340
Yes, sir.
1309
01:19:57,015 --> 01:19:59,905
An inmate from Litchfield
Federal Prison is attempting to contact you.
1310
01:19:59,975 --> 01:20:02,865
To accept this call, please press one.
1311
01:20:02,935 --> 01:20:05,905
- Do we take that?
- It's Piper.
1312
01:20:05,975 --> 01:20:08,182
We have to.
1313
01:20:10,615 --> 01:20:13,141
- Piper.
- Hi. Are you alone?
1314
01:20:14,855 --> 01:20:16,937
I'm in the car with Polly.
You're on speaker.
1315
01:20:17,015 --> 01:20:19,985
Ha. Of course I am.
1316
01:20:20,055 --> 01:20:22,023
Listen, do you want to make it up to me?
1317
01:20:24,215 --> 01:20:27,264
- Depends on what that means.
- I need a favor.
1318
01:20:27,335 --> 01:20:30,976
And, Larry,
if you're not willing to do this...
1319
01:20:31,095 --> 01:20:34,463
- then, Polly, I'm asking you.
- What is it?
1320
01:20:34,535 --> 01:20:39,063
There's a probation officer, and his name
is David Crockett just like Davy Crockett.
1321
01:20:39,135 --> 01:20:43,697
He probably works for the Federal Division
of the Queens County Probation Office.
1322
01:20:43,815 --> 01:20:46,261
I'm sure that you can find
the bureau online.
1323
01:20:46,335 --> 01:20:49,623
- Okay.
- I need you to call him...
1324
01:20:49,695 --> 01:20:54,940
and tell him that Alex Vause...
1325
01:20:55,015 --> 01:20:57,780
is violating her probation...
1326
01:20:57,855 --> 01:21:01,780
and that she is on her way out of town.
1327
01:21:01,855 --> 01:21:04,096
- Is that true?
- Yes.
1328
01:21:05,175 --> 01:21:06,904
And the purpose of this is what?
1329
01:21:06,975 --> 01:21:08,500
Larry.
1330
01:21:08,575 --> 01:21:12,022
I am giving you the opportunity
to fuck over someone that you hate.
1331
01:21:13,615 --> 01:21:15,344
And why would I do that?
1332
01:21:15,415 --> 01:21:17,417
So she lands back in there with you?
1333
01:21:18,375 --> 01:21:20,264
Polly?
1334
01:21:22,575 --> 01:21:24,304
What's the office called again?
1335
01:21:44,055 --> 01:21:45,739
Where is she?
1336
01:21:49,295 --> 01:21:51,297
Anybody seen Parker?
1337
01:21:53,535 --> 01:21:55,060
Parker?
1338
01:21:56,415 --> 01:21:58,816
You don't know where your inmates are?
1339
01:22:20,735 --> 01:22:23,500
Hello? Jesus.
1340
01:22:27,815 --> 01:22:29,146
Okay.
1341
01:22:52,215 --> 01:22:56,186
The laundry room where the meth heads work?
What the fuck were you thinkin'?
1342
01:22:56,255 --> 01:23:00,943
I was thinking it's a place big enough
to hold it, and it would have to do for now.
1343
01:23:01,015 --> 01:23:03,700
All right. Well, come on.
1344
01:23:03,775 --> 01:23:06,062
Start stuffin' these down your pants
and head back to the warehouse.
1345
01:23:06,135 --> 01:23:08,615
I'll grab Caputo, we lead him to it,
and we nail the bitch.
1346
01:23:08,695 --> 01:23:10,379
Wait a minute.
1347
01:23:10,455 --> 01:23:13,618
You want me to walk from here to the
warehouse with heroin stuffed in my pants?
1348
01:23:13,695 --> 01:23:16,539
- No fuckin' way.
- Come on. You're already bulky.
1349
01:23:16,615 --> 01:23:19,186
- No one's gonna notice.
- Ha.
1350
01:23:19,255 --> 01:23:21,496
- How'd you get it here in the first place?
- Laundry bag.
1351
01:23:21,575 --> 01:23:24,579
I hid it in some clothes. It makes sense.
Go to the laundry with a bag of clothes.
1352
01:23:24,655 --> 01:23:27,625
It makes no sense to go to the warehouse
with a laundry bag of clothes.
1353
01:23:27,695 --> 01:23:29,220
Yeah, well, here's an idea.
1354
01:23:29,295 --> 01:23:31,775
Why didn't you just leave it there
in a different spot?
1355
01:23:31,855 --> 01:23:33,300
- Seriously?
- Uh-huh.
1356
01:23:33,375 --> 01:23:35,184
You know she tore that place apart.
1357
01:23:35,255 --> 01:23:38,020
If it was me,
I would have torn that place apart.
1358
01:23:39,695 --> 01:23:41,936
You know, Nicky.
1359
01:23:42,015 --> 01:23:45,736
What if Caputo doesn't believe that this is
Vee's? I mean, what if he thinks it's ours?
1360
01:23:48,775 --> 01:23:50,300
Maybe we should keep it?
1361
01:23:50,375 --> 01:23:51,979
Oh, fuck.
1362
01:23:52,055 --> 01:23:53,739
Shit.
1363
01:23:54,975 --> 01:23:57,865
Everybody down?
1364
01:23:57,935 --> 01:23:59,903
- Good.
- What's going on?
1365
01:23:59,975 --> 01:24:02,057
Parker's missing.
1366
01:24:11,135 --> 01:24:12,625
Stay here.
1367
01:24:18,535 --> 01:24:20,503
I repeat, we are in lockdown.
1368
01:24:20,615 --> 01:24:24,097
- What's goin' on?
- An inmate is missing.
1369
01:24:25,455 --> 01:24:27,298
Back to your bunks for count.
1370
01:24:27,415 --> 01:24:30,259
All right. Come on, son.
We'll deal with this later.
1371
01:24:30,375 --> 01:24:34,016
All inmates return
to your bunks for a count immediately.
1372
01:24:34,095 --> 01:24:35,938
Nichols?
1373
01:24:38,295 --> 01:24:41,424
This prison is officially on lockdown.
1374
01:24:41,495 --> 01:24:44,897
Please remain in your bunks
until further notice.
1375
01:24:45,015 --> 01:24:46,858
Holy shit. We got a runner.
1376
01:24:46,975 --> 01:24:49,421
You ever had a runner before?
1377
01:24:49,495 --> 01:24:52,499
- No.
- Oh, it's fun.
1378
01:25:27,775 --> 01:25:30,381
- Don't take another step!
- Whoa! Whoa! Hey! Hey!
1379
01:25:31,255 --> 01:25:35,021
What the fuck? Can I help you?
1380
01:25:35,095 --> 01:25:36,745
I-I-I didn't know you were home.
1381
01:25:36,815 --> 01:25:39,944
I don't fucking care!
You can't just walk into my apartment!
1382
01:25:40,015 --> 01:25:43,986
Yeah, I know that... usually.
But... he asked me to.
1383
01:25:47,735 --> 01:25:50,136
- Mr. Crockett.
- Ms. Vause.
1384
01:25:50,215 --> 01:25:51,740
Fuck.
1385
01:25:54,135 --> 01:25:56,581
And you will remain in your bunks
until further notice.
1386
01:25:56,655 --> 01:25:59,226
No exceptions, no excuses.
1387
01:25:59,295 --> 01:26:02,697
- Fall out.
- Okay.
1388
01:26:09,135 --> 01:26:11,103
Escort guards, we need you on the outside.
1389
01:26:11,175 --> 01:26:13,064
Escort guards to the outside.
1390
01:26:20,015 --> 01:26:24,703
A Dorm, B Dorm, C Dorm, we are on lockdown.
1391
01:26:24,775 --> 01:26:27,585
Return to your area immediately.
1392
01:26:32,775 --> 01:26:34,777
You got some good hair, girl.
1393
01:26:34,855 --> 01:26:38,257
Almost that Tracee Ellis Ross
biracial texture.
1394
01:26:38,335 --> 01:26:39,985
- Almost.
- Ho-ho-ho.
1395
01:26:40,055 --> 01:26:44,504
It's a little dry though. Need to get you
a co-wash, maybe a hot-oil treatment.
1396
01:26:44,575 --> 01:26:46,418
Fifteen, 16-
1397
01:26:46,495 --> 01:26:48,418
Oh, wait.
See, keep your leg straight.
1398
01:26:48,495 --> 01:26:51,180
Yeah. So, 17, 18-
1399
01:26:51,255 --> 01:26:55,021
For over 15 years,
that woman was fuckin' insane.
1400
01:26:55,095 --> 01:26:56,620
Then fuckin' ditched your ass.
1401
01:26:56,695 --> 01:27:00,177
But you, man, how y'all gonna
dis me like that in here?
1402
01:27:24,255 --> 01:27:26,257
Fuck it.
1403
01:27:28,535 --> 01:27:30,981
Don't die in here, Miss Rosa.
1404
01:27:31,055 --> 01:27:32,625
Go do it your own way.
1405
01:27:32,695 --> 01:27:34,026
What do I do?
1406
01:27:36,095 --> 01:27:37,665
Go fast.
1407
01:27:46,495 --> 01:27:48,418
Prison's on lockdown.
1408
01:27:48,495 --> 01:27:50,702
We need to get her back to rooms
and get you back-
1409
01:27:50,775 --> 01:27:52,061
- What the fuck?
- Oh.
1410
01:27:52,135 --> 01:27:54,103
- Lord in heaven-
- Oh, shit.
1411
01:27:54,175 --> 01:27:55,745
- Shit! Shit! Shit!
- Oh, my goodness!
1412
01:27:55,815 --> 01:27:58,386
Come back here.
You're gonna get in big trouble, Rosa!
1413
01:28:05,375 --> 01:28:07,025
What's going on with the alarms?
1414
01:28:07,135 --> 01:28:09,786
As far as you're concerned,
we're just testing the system.
1415
01:28:09,855 --> 01:28:11,584
Tell me again what you're gonna say.
1416
01:28:11,655 --> 01:28:16,024
- “I've elected to end my hunger strike.”
- That's right.
1417
01:28:16,095 --> 01:28:18,860
I feel like a shill.
1418
01:28:18,935 --> 01:28:20,903
Greater good, Ingalls. Eye on the prize.
1419
01:28:20,975 --> 01:28:22,465
Go on.
1420
01:28:22,535 --> 01:28:24,742
“Thanks to the efforts of you, my sisters...
1421
01:28:24,815 --> 01:28:27,216
the administration has heard our outcry...
1422
01:28:27,295 --> 01:28:31,425
and is taking steps
to address our complaints.”
1423
01:28:33,575 --> 01:28:37,466
“Beginning with the appointment
of Assistant Warden Joe Caputo.”
1424
01:28:41,015 --> 01:28:42,540
What the fuck?
1425
01:28:42,615 --> 01:28:45,095
O'Neill! Scatter the nuns!
1426
01:28:45,215 --> 01:28:47,456
Run, nuns! Run!
1427
01:28:47,535 --> 01:28:48,536
Run!
1428
01:28:59,055 --> 01:29:01,023
Oh, fuck.
1429
01:29:28,815 --> 01:29:31,295
And that backup
is due to roadwork that's gonna be...
1430
01:29:31,375 --> 01:29:33,343
goin' on probably until tomorrow night.
1431
01:29:33,415 --> 01:29:35,577
Now, if you 're traveling
eastbound on Duncan-
1432
01:31:49,815 --> 01:31:57,815
Ripped By mstoll