1 00:00:02,280 --> 00:00:04,480 (MACHINES WHIRR SOFTLY) (PHONE RINGS) 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:10,320 - Hey. Water department figures. - Hey. Oh. 3 00:00:10,320 --> 00:00:13,120 - Did that guy call back? - Oh. Mr 'I Was Just About To Call You.' 4 00:00:13,120 --> 00:00:16,400 - No. No, no, the... - Yes, he said the inspection budget's down 10%. 5 00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:18,440 - Down?! - Yeah. - Great. So - 6 00:00:18,440 --> 00:00:21,240 - You know who I'm gonna follow up with? Angie. - Angie. - OK. 7 00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:23,040 Hey, ed. You wanted to see me? 8 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:25,760 Hey. Adam, did you just call me 'Ed'? 9 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:28,000 - My name's Ned. - It's short for editor-in-chief. 10 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,880 I saw you and Mare talking fast to one another, 11 00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:32,400 and I thought, 'You guys wanna save some time? Watch this.' 12 00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:35,240 Well, it worked. 13 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:36,840 OK, so... 14 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:40,320 'Local man Victor Premens stuffed a Dyson in his pants 15 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:43,080 and walked out of an East Toledo Target as a joke, 16 00:00:43,080 --> 00:00:47,240 but the prudish Store Manager didn't get the punchline.' 17 00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:50,400 - Crazy. - It is. Who was your source for this article? 18 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:53,000 - Victor Premens. - The man who... 19 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:55,320 stuffed the vacuum in his pants? 20 00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:57,520 - Yeah, as a hilarious joke. - OK. 21 00:00:57,520 --> 00:01:00,320 - Did you get any other sources for the article? - Hmm. 22 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,280 - I did not. - No, right. 23 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:07,800 I want you to consider that Victor may've been lying to you. 24 00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:11,600 - Mm. - That he only said that it was a joke because he got caught. 25 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,440 Um... OK. 26 00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:21,960 I think this could be the lead story in the 'Also News'. 27 00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:24,400 - Happy? - Yeah. Thank you. 28 00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:27,920 Oh, yeah, I started something called the Also News. 29 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:31,760 We print it right here, it's distributed only on this floor, 30 00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:33,920 and Adam is the star reporter... 31 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:35,840 for the Also News. 32 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,760 As journalists, we are going to get lied to. 33 00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:41,960 But one of our jobs is to separate fact from fiction. 34 00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,200 And to place commas correctly, right, Adelola? 35 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:46,200 - It was one comma. Let it go. - Yeah, OK. 36 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,400 Yeah, so, I wrote a sad story about a woman who owned a pet pig. 37 00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:51,400 Um... 38 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:53,960 The pig was also named Yvette, so that didn't help. 39 00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:56,040 So, I thought, as we're all still new to this, 40 00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:58,120 we could play a little game to train our instincts. 41 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:00,120 The game is called Two Truths And A Lie. 42 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,120 - It's fun. - The drinking game, right? 43 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:05,280 Oh, I would actually prefer not to drink at work if that's OK. 44 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:08,440 We're not gonna drink. No-one's drinking. (CLEARS THROAT) 45 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,520 (DOOR OPENS) 46 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:18,440 (DOOR CLOSES) OK! Pair up and get your BS detectors out. 47 00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:20,680 - Travis. - Should I get Mare? - What's up, Adelola? 48 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:23,600 Oh, no, she's on deadline. Right, Mare? 49 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:26,240 - Right, Ma... Hey, Mare - - I'm on deadline! - OK. 50 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:31,280 Remember, you're listening for the ring of truth... 51 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:33,800 and the clonk of lies. 52 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:35,840 OK. 53 00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:39,640 - Go. - OK. 54 00:02:39,640 --> 00:02:41,640 I buy a new toothbrush every week. 55 00:02:41,640 --> 00:02:43,480 I can't feel pain on the bottoms of my feet. 56 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,560 I once misdialled a phone number and accidentally called Martin Lawrence. 57 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:48,760 OK, well, you don't have that many good stories, 58 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:51,680 so I don't think you'd hold onto the Martin Lawrence thing for that long. 59 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:54,400 Right? Unless it's not the Martin Lawrence that we all know and love. 60 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:57,400 - ALL: Ooh. - May I please see the bottoms of your feet? 61 00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,760 - No. - Martin Lawrence is a lie. 62 00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,480 - Nice. Very good. - That was good. - Very good. 63 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:05,680 - That was good. - Thank you. - I once knocked out Muhammad Ali. 64 00:03:08,640 --> 00:03:10,080 And? 65 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:13,160 (PHONE RINGS) - And what? - OK, who doesn't have any good stories? 66 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,320 'Oh, my goodness! You've reached Martin Lawrence. 67 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:19,240 When you hear that beep, you know what to do!' (ALL EXCLAIMING) 68 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:21,360 The first time I called him, he thought I was his niece. 69 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:23,120 We had this really sweet heart-to-heart 70 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:24,400 about my spending habits. 71 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:27,200 But ever since then, it just goes to voicemail. Yeah. 72 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:29,240 (ALL EXCLAIMING) (PHONE CHIMES) Uh... Who's this? 73 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:31,640 Wait, he just texted. 'Stop calling this number.' 74 00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:34,240 (EXCITED CHATTER AND YELLING) 75 00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:36,160 - Can you send me his number? - For real? 76 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:07,400 All right. Adam's piece was picked up by the Also News. 77 00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:10,200 So we are one article short. 78 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:12,200 Oh, how terrible. 79 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:14,320 Ned is still here. 80 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:17,200 Perhaps he has cockroach DNA. 81 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:19,200 Do you know cockroach? 82 00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:21,960 That you try to smash it, but then it doesn't die? 83 00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:24,280 He turns on his back. 84 00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:26,840 You know? That's Ned! 85 00:04:26,840 --> 00:04:30,560 And you pretend that you're happy that he's alive. 86 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:32,360 - Ned. - Yeah? 87 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:34,720 I really want this to...to succeed. 88 00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:39,440 - Thanks. - What is our Wirecutter? 89 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,560 What is our Wordle? 90 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:46,720 We need things...which keep people's minds off the bloody news. 91 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:50,080 You have to remember our core audience is people on toilets. 92 00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:53,640 - I have an idea. - Oh, my God! 93 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:56,440 - How long have you been there?! - The whole time. 94 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:59,120 - I thought you were a pile of shirts. - Nope. 95 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:01,200 Yes, Mare? Let's hear it. 96 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:04,440 So, in the '90s, the paper used to do this section called Shame On You. 97 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:08,480 We'd, like, uncover a business scam and catch 'em in the act. 98 00:05:08,480 --> 00:05:10,320 Oh, that's... OK, that's good. I like that. 99 00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:12,320 - Yeah. - I've got a list of businesses 100 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:14,000 who wouldn't advertise with us. 101 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:16,440 So you can select your targets from there, Mare. 102 00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:18,200 Mare, do you have a business in mind? 103 00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:19,880 OK, I just bought a new mattress. 104 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:22,480 Do you know this scam with mattress stores? Ugh. 105 00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:24,720 OK, so, basically, they all carry the exact same stuff 106 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:27,160 but change the name so you can't compare prices. 107 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:30,240 - False advertising scam! - God, yeah. - Let's do it. 108 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,320 OK. Great. 109 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:35,400 Great. 110 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,320 - Ned. - Yeah? 111 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:41,320 I'm so sorry about the disappointing news. 112 00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:43,560 You must be very sad. 113 00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:45,440 (SIGHS) 114 00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:47,800 What's... Uh... Sorry, what? 115 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,720 Oh, because you don't know? About Mare? 116 00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:54,840 Mare, the woman whose parents named her after a horse. 117 00:05:54,840 --> 00:05:57,680 She's leaving us for the hotel business. 118 00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:00,920 What? 119 00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:03,040 No, that makes no sense. 120 00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:05,840 I literally just sent her out on a story just now. 121 00:06:05,840 --> 00:06:09,520 Sadly, I got a call from Mr Bob Willis, 122 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:12,720 at Radisson, checking for her references. 123 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,280 She got accepted to a... 124 00:06:15,280 --> 00:06:17,520 concierge training programme, 125 00:06:17,520 --> 00:06:19,760 which we know, it's... 126 00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:22,440 But it seems like that's what she wants. 127 00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:25,440 - She didn't say anything to me. - She's embarrassed. 128 00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:29,920 I mean, it's giving up her dreams for a paycheque. 129 00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:32,920 - Or maybe she just doesn't believe in you. - She's... (SIGHS) 130 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:35,800 She's the only one here with any reporting experience. 131 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:39,000 I will never get a fair hearing from Ned. 132 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:43,480 I mean, I could be the most amazing reporter on this planet - 133 00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:45,360 some people say I am - but... 134 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:47,680 I could never beat the sex pheromones 135 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:49,920 that Mare is putting out there. 136 00:06:49,920 --> 00:06:52,080 - I'm gonna talk to her about it. - Wait! Wait. - What? 137 00:06:52,080 --> 00:06:53,720 - What? - Why do you want to do that? 138 00:06:53,720 --> 00:06:56,760 Because she's our best reporter, and I don't wanna lose her. 139 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:58,640 - And? - And... What? - And. - 'And'? 140 00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:01,320 You think she's a beautiful woman? From a certain angle? 141 00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:04,480 - What? - With the right light? - Oh, OK. No, um... 142 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:06,720 Hey. Uh... Uh... 143 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:10,040 - That is incredibly inappropriate. - She's your favourite! 144 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:14,320 I saw you looking at her like a dog on my auntie's leg. 145 00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:16,080 Christ, no, no, no, no. Stop that. 146 00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:18,760 That is not - Hey, stop that! I would not do that! 147 00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:20,720 I barely... We've been... 148 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:23,240 I... She works...with me. 149 00:07:23,240 --> 00:07:25,880 - My mistake. I apologise. - Good. - Actually, it's good. 150 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:28,960 Because I thought this would've been more bad news for you, 151 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:30,440 but now I feel I can tell you, 152 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:32,240 and it's not going to hurt your feelings. 153 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:33,960 - Yeah. - OK. 154 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:35,880 Because Mare, she's uh... 155 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,480 you know, assesuale. 156 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:40,000 - I don't... What... - She's... 157 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:42,720 a...sexual... Like... 158 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:44,880 she's... - Oh. - ..not a sexual person. 159 00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,760 - I don't - - She's not, really. She's not. - OK. 160 00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:49,080 That's why they want her at Radisson - because... 161 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:50,960 she is a diversity hire. 162 00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:53,960 (STAMMERS) Sure. I don't uh... That's not any of my... 163 00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,280 - Yeah. Of course. - ..bus... Whatever way... - Of course. 164 00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:59,720 - I don't care about that, so. - No, no, it's just that she's a...sexual. 165 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,960 - I got it. Stop. - Like, this is what she is. 166 00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:06,240 First of all, whatever way Mare wants to live her life is...her choice. 167 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:08,520 - Oh, yeah. - OK? Second of all... 168 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:11,960 - Are you sure? - You should ask her. 169 00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:15,600 I'm sure she would be OK to talk about it with you. 170 00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:18,000 Because you are her boss. 171 00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,560 - You are curious about her sexuality. - No. 172 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:24,440 And if the HR lawyers would say anything about it, 173 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:26,320 I got your back. 174 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:28,960 - Uh... - Mint? 175 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,240 Uh... 176 00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:33,000 I'm trying to run a paper here. 177 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,800 I can't be losing my best reporter to the Radisson. 178 00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:39,040 Maybe they'd take Adam. 179 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,320 (WHIRRS) 180 00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:44,000 (NED KNOCKS) (SIGHS) Hey. 181 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:46,120 Hey! I'm sorry. I'm just printing these out. 182 00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:48,720 - I'm off to the mattress store. - Not at all. I'm not rushing you. 183 00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:51,880 Just take your time. We've been around a hundred years. 184 00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:53,760 - We'll be around a hundred more. - It's... 185 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:55,280 (LAUGHS) Um... 186 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,880 If you had to put odds on us succeeding... 187 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:01,720 ..you know, near future, long-term... - Mm-hm. 188 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:03,560 ..what're you feeling? Throw out a number. 189 00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:05,720 95%. 95%. 190 00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:09,920 - Wow. - I'm leaving 5% open in case of asteroid. Which'd be a shame. 191 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:12,840 - Because that would be a great story to cover. - Good story. - But... 192 00:09:12,840 --> 00:09:15,240 otherwise, no doubts whatsoever. 100%. 193 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:18,320 Asteroids are real. 95%. 194 00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:21,200 Wow. Well, ya can't beat those odds. 195 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:24,520 I'm sorry, 95%? 196 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:26,560 That's delusional, right? 197 00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:28,280 And a little nerve-wracking, 198 00:09:28,280 --> 00:09:30,040 considering he holds my career in his hands. 199 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:33,840 Unless he's really amazing. He did sell a crazy amount of toilet paper. 200 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,280 OK, I'll see you later. 201 00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:38,960 No, don't...don't... uh...don't leave. 202 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,400 - What was that? - Let's hunt down the mattress store... 203 00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:43,200 story together - you and me. 204 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:47,200 You wanna come to some... mattress stores with me? 205 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:49,720 Because you've got such a fun job, let's both enjoy it. 206 00:09:49,720 --> 00:09:53,920 Sure. Woodward and... Woodward's boss. 207 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:57,080 - Ben Bradlee. - Ah, OK, you actually...knew that. 208 00:09:58,520 --> 00:10:01,080 Oh, you run so athletically. 209 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:04,240 (PAPER RUSTLING) (KNOCK AT DOOR) 210 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:05,760 - Hey, Chief. - Hey! 211 00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:07,320 Just cos I'm your editor-in-chief, 212 00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:09,040 you don't have to call me that. - Uh... 213 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:12,240 I wasn't. I'm just... I'm not good with names. Um... 214 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:16,680 - Ned. - Ned! Ned. Ned. 215 00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:19,160 - Ned. - Ned, Ned, Ned. I knew it was something old-timey. 216 00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,520 Ned, got it. Ned. 217 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:24,040 - Is this - - Anyways, Two Truths And A Lie. 218 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,720 -Mm. -It was very helpful. And since I finished my article already... 219 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:28,760 I wanted to know if I could do it with somebody else. 220 00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:30,840 - Like for... Like for practice. - Oh. 221 00:10:30,840 --> 00:10:32,800 - Maybe, um...Nicole. - Travis? Or... 222 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,200 Yeah, yeah, Trav... Travis is cool, but I was thinking more like uh... 223 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:39,360 - Adam? - Nicole? - Whoever you want. 224 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:41,960 OK, I'm gonna tell Nicole you said to do it. Thanks, Fred. 225 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:46,560 NICOLE: Detrick. I don't really think of him that way. 226 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:49,320 My type, historically, has been know-it-alls... 227 00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:51,440 who don't really like me, so... 228 00:10:51,440 --> 00:10:54,280 pretty much the complete opposite of Detrick. 229 00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:57,080 (INHALES) 230 00:10:57,080 --> 00:10:59,600 Oscar? May I approach? 231 00:10:59,600 --> 00:11:02,280 - You may. - So. 232 00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:05,080 Me and Mare, we're working on a really interesting piece. 233 00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:07,600 -It's called Shame On You. -I don't care. -I know you don't care. -Nope. 234 00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:09,800 I know you don't. No pressure, all right? No pressure. 235 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:12,000 -I'm not putting any pressure on you. -I can see that. 236 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:15,280 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) But just in case it's not done in time... 237 00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:18,720 would you mind whipping up another sudoku for the paper? 238 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:22,280 -That last one was just... -Well... -..was so good. I couldn't look away. 239 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:25,200 - Thank you. That's... I'm pretty busy...is the thing. - OK, totally. 240 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:28,320 - It's just...I know you're good with numbers. Could be fun. - Well. 241 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:31,480 - Saying that work is fun... - Uh-huh. - ..is a form of pressure. 242 00:11:31,480 --> 00:11:33,880 Quite frankly, it's giving me PTSD... 243 00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:36,080 from an old boss. - OK. 244 00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:39,360 I apologise. No more pressure. 245 00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:42,280 - So, I'll put you down as a maybe? - Don't count on it. - OK. 246 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:45,760 (sings) Maybe... I'm a maybe... (LIFT BELL DINGS) 247 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:47,120 (DOOR CLOSES) 248 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:49,440 I don't know why Ned wants us to play Two Truths And A Lie, 249 00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:51,440 but he's the boss. So, um... 250 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,560 ..yeah. (SIGHS) 251 00:11:54,560 --> 00:11:56,720 Sushi? 252 00:11:56,720 --> 00:12:00,400 Where'd you get that sushi? There's no sushi around here. 253 00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:02,600 I hate to disagree with you right off the bat, 254 00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:04,280 but they have it at the gas station. 255 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:07,760 Ew. When'd you get that sushi? 256 00:12:07,760 --> 00:12:10,360 You haven't left all day, and your car was here when I got in. 257 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:13,280 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) OK, The Noticer. 258 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:15,840 - Yeah, that's what they call me. - (LAUGHS) Cool. 259 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,840 There's a new noticer in town. 260 00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,640 All right, um...how about this. 261 00:12:23,640 --> 00:12:25,480 I ask you a question - 262 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:27,920 if you don't wanna answer it, you uh...eat a piece of sushi. 263 00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:29,800 It's not that bad, for real. 264 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:32,640 Well, there's your lie. 265 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:35,720 (LAUGHS) OK. (LAUGHS) 266 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:39,520 MARE: OK, so what kinda couple should we be? 267 00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:41,680 Just a regular couple. Uh... Not regular. 268 00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:43,480 Uh... Hetero. 269 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:46,360 -C... Uh... Cis? -I don't understand. -What are you... What are you asking? 270 00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:48,280 No, I just mean are we bougie, you know? 271 00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:50,520 Or are we cheap? Are we too online? 272 00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:53,280 Are we not online at all in a way that's kinda weird? Do we have kids? 273 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:55,640 - Do you want kids and I don't and it's tearing us apart? - Hey. 274 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:57,520 If this is making you at all uncomfortable... 275 00:12:57,520 --> 00:13:00,200 we don't have to be a couple at all, all right? - Well, what... 276 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:03,120 We can just be...brother and sister. 277 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:06,040 Who are buying a mattress together? 278 00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:10,200 Our mom... gets debilitating bladder infections. 279 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,320 She's incontinent. So we have to buy a mattress for her. 280 00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:14,920 Oh, my God. We're just a couple, OK? 281 00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:17,160 - Keep the mom thing in your back pocket... - I don't - 282 00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:18,920 ..if everything goes wrong. 283 00:13:18,920 --> 00:13:22,480 - I am so sorry to hear about your mother. - Thanks. - Thank you. 284 00:13:22,480 --> 00:13:25,720 - It's his mother. We're actually married. - I'm also her boss. 285 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:30,480 At a sleep research facility. 286 00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:34,080 But we keep things very professional, right? We... We... 287 00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:36,440 We don't use any of the beds at work... 288 00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:39,320 for... This would be our home mattress, 289 00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:42,160 where we...where... It'd be our... We're... 290 00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:44,840 So, we're actually doing that whole, like... 291 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,240 going around, price-comp thing. - Mm-hm. 292 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,160 - Oh! - And we were super interested 293 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:51,080 in your StayCool Hybrid FirmRest Foam. 294 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,680 - Right, honey? - Yes. Yes. Hm. 295 00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:55,080 - Yes, right over here. - Oh. - Oh. - Great. 296 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:57,080 1,900 for a queen. 297 00:13:57,080 --> 00:14:01,360 - Great. And your ad says you match any price, right? - That's right. 298 00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:03,960 - As long as it's the same mattress. - Totally. That's great. 299 00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,520 Because we actually just saw one over at Twice Upon A Mattress 300 00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:09,280 that looks identical to the StayCool Hybrid FirmRest Foam, 301 00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:12,240 but it was 1,550 - would you honour that price? 302 00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:15,720 Ah, I assure you, the StayCool Hybrid FirmRest Foam 303 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,840 is exclusive to our store. - Ah. 304 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:20,080 That's too bad, since I'm a sleep researcher, 305 00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:24,160 and my wife is the person who shaves people before our experiments. 306 00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:26,320 A nurse? 307 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:29,360 It's more specific than that. 308 00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:31,560 (INHALES) We could really use these savings. 309 00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:33,440 - I wish I could help. - Mm. 310 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:36,200 But the lumbar support... it definitely will. 311 00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:38,840 - (LAUGHS) Oh! - Do you mind just checking for us, though? 312 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:41,600 She's very thorough. 313 00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:43,640 (LAUGHS) Yeah. I'm just gonna go um... 314 00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:45,960 - Thank you. - Let me see if I can get my Manager. - Thank you. 315 00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,960 That'd be great. 316 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:54,880 (SIGHS) Hi. 317 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:57,960 I am incredibly sorry about my limp. 318 00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:00,200 I hurt my foot last night. 319 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:02,400 (EXHALES) At my match. 320 00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:05,040 Darts playoff final. We won. 321 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:07,680 I scored the winning double. 322 00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:09,920 - OSCAR: Hm. - This happened afterwards. I was mugged. 323 00:15:09,920 --> 00:15:11,880 Nearly mugged, for the winnings and trophy. 324 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:13,600 Ken, I heard you dropped a dart on your foot? 325 00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:15,560 I did, indeed, sir. 326 00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:19,240 This is just our biweekly budget meeting with Marv, 327 00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:22,360 in which we have absolutely nothing unusual planned. 328 00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:24,920 And if I am rubbing my hands together slightly, 329 00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:26,720 it's because it's chilly in here. 330 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:28,480 - Everybody here? - ESMERALDA: Yes. 331 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:30,320 - Well - - I believe we are all here. 332 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:32,360 Well, let me double check. 333 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:35,720 One, two, three, fo... 334 00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:38,480 Oh, my God! Where's Ned? 335 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:41,360 - He was going to be the fourth person I counted. - No Ned. 336 00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:45,320 Yesterday, he said that his time is too precious to waste it 337 00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:47,480 with boring, pointless meetings. 338 00:15:48,840 --> 00:15:52,640 -Does Ned think this is one of those? -Impossible. Surely. 339 00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:54,480 Hm. 340 00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:57,240 - Interesting way to make an impression. - Right? 341 00:15:57,240 --> 00:16:00,040 (SIGHS) - Should we just call him? - Oh, no. No. No need. 342 00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:02,360 He knows about this meeting, I left him a note. 343 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:03,600 - She left him a note. - All right. 344 00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:10,200 Oh. MOBMIAB - Marv's Office Budget Meeting In A Bit. 345 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,320 Yes, classic shorthand. 346 00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:14,760 Ned doesn't have time to read the whole sentence 347 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:17,560 while he's flirting all day long with that US troop. 348 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:21,680 OK, would you rather be able... 349 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,640 to speak to animals or... 350 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:26,960 - Mm. - ..speak any human language ever that you want? 351 00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:28,600 Speak to animals. 352 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,480 - Yeah! - No-one talks to animals. 353 00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:33,880 - Right. - Um... We could talk about your bird? 354 00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:36,800 Um... Well, Cardi Beak was given to me as a gift. 355 00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:39,640 And then I just... I just got attached. 356 00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:42,360 Who gives a live bird as a gift to someone? So much work. 357 00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:44,640 It's like handing someone a baby. That's psychotic. 358 00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:46,720 It's pretty psychotic, right? Yeah. No. (LAUGHS) 359 00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:48,440 This... This guy I used to date. 360 00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:51,680 Oh, um...what happened? Was the...the bird the last straw? 361 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:53,880 (SCOFFS) No, his wife was. 362 00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:55,880 Ooh, um... 363 00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:59,240 Let's... Let's keep going. Um... 364 00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:01,400 What's um... What's your... 365 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:03,640 What's your favourite brand of ketchup? 366 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,520 Where the heck is this guy? I'm starting to get worked up! 367 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:12,600 WOMAN: (from next room) Don't get worked up, Marv! 368 00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:14,960 Ann's right. I'm not gonna get worked up. 369 00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:18,320 Let's get him on the phone. Ann! 370 00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:24,320 - Yes, Marv? - I think we should start. 371 00:17:24,320 --> 00:17:26,720 Ned is so gifted at delegating to me. 372 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,800 Let's start! 373 00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:31,800 - False alarm, Ann. - Oh, well. 374 00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:34,400 It was time for me to stretch my legs anyway, so... 375 00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:36,400 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) - You OK? - Yeah, I'm good! 376 00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:42,440 Right, so, first on the docket - paying for stories. 377 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,120 Turns out, we have to... 378 00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:46,040 do that...legally. 379 00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:48,160 Otherwise, we don't own the stories. 380 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:50,520 - Huh. - Oh, no, really? 381 00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:53,560 I mean, that's going to cost more money. 382 00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:56,880 That's a big problem. Maybe we could... 383 00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:59,480 stop doing original stories, and we could... 384 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:02,200 go back to the way it was before Ned. 385 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:05,000 At least until we figure out what's going on. 386 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:06,600 Hmm. 387 00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:10,200 Well, we don't have unlimited money to throw around. 388 00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:12,240 We're all in agreement there, but maybe... 389 00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:15,200 that's why we should just wait till Ned gets here to talk about this. 390 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:17,920 His absence has done his talking for him. 391 00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:19,800 - Don't you agree? - Don't you? 392 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,320 Before we continue, I have to... 393 00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:28,880 ..use the restroom, please. 394 00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:32,040 Please. 395 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,320 So formal. 396 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:41,360 (SIGHS) All right, whatever. 397 00:18:41,360 --> 00:18:45,560 The fix is in. Ned is going to get screwed by Esmeralda and Ken. 398 00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:51,200 But if I go against them, Esmeralda will hold it against me forever. 399 00:18:52,120 --> 00:18:53,920 (EXHALES) 400 00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:57,400 This one's actually pretty comfortable. 401 00:18:57,400 --> 00:19:00,160 Oh, yeah, the Relaxer Cloud. That's the one I went with. 402 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:02,600 You spent 2,200 dollars? 403 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:04,400 Jesus, no, that's for the queen. 404 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,320 - Mine was, like, 600 on sale. - 600? 405 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:09,520 - Yeah. - What's that, like, a twin? - Mm-hm. 406 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:12,840 What? 407 00:19:12,840 --> 00:19:14,720 I... Sorry, I served our country. 408 00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:16,560 - I got used to a narrow bed in the army. - No. 409 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:19,080 Yes. Army. Got it. 410 00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:24,320 Army? Come on. You cannot choose... what kind of bed you wanna buy. 411 00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,400 That's just the way you were born. 412 00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:30,600 If buying a twin bed is what feels right, then that's what's right. 413 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:32,280 Doesn't make you any less of a reporter. 414 00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:33,920 Doesn't make you any less of anything. 415 00:19:33,920 --> 00:19:36,360 It just means you've got more space in your bedroom 416 00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:38,800 to buy a desk...to do more reporting. 417 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:42,040 Oh, my God. I just like being held, OK? 418 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:45,720 What's the point of sleeping with someone if you can't even feel them, 419 00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:47,880 because the bed is so big? 420 00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:50,680 I mean, a king bed? It's like, 'OK, good night. 421 00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:53,280 See you tomorrow - hope nothing bad happens to you in your sleep, 422 00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:55,680 because I'd never know about it.' 423 00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:57,600 I mean, Cindy is never coming back. 424 00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,680 - She's getting her Manager. - Are you kidding? 425 00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:02,120 - We've been here 20 minutes. - She said she was coming back. 426 00:20:02,120 --> 00:20:04,440 She has to come back, otherwise she's leaving herself open 427 00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:06,200 to a bad customer service review. 428 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:08,240 She's coming back. 429 00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:10,720 Yeah. 430 00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:13,160 (PHONE VIBRATES) 431 00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:15,280 - Mm. - Oh, you know what? - Yeah? 432 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,920 - This is my dad. - Mm-hm. - Um... 433 00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:20,720 I'll be right back. (PHONE CLICKS) 434 00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:24,480 Hi. Mr Willis, how are you? 435 00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:27,280 Yes, no, I am... 436 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,200 absolutely interested. Um... 437 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:31,960 Could I just have until tomorrow morning to get back to you? 438 00:20:33,360 --> 00:20:36,000 Thank you so much. You have a good day as well. OK. 439 00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:39,000 (PHONE BEEPS) How is he? 440 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:42,520 Um... He's OK. COVID for, like, the fourth time. 441 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,040 Cindy? 442 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:51,320 - Cindy? - She's not coming back. 443 00:20:51,320 --> 00:20:52,880 - (yelling) Cindy! - Ned. 444 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:55,800 I mean, I don't think she's coming back. 445 00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:58,240 (SIGHS) This is unreal. 446 00:20:58,240 --> 00:20:59,680 Hey. 447 00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:01,680 - What? - Hey, look at this. 448 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:06,240 Dayton Bold Manufacturers. It's a mattress supplier. 449 00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,320 You have that in there? 450 00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:10,360 - Yes. - Direct number. 451 00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:12,320 They've got a mattress store caller ID. 452 00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:14,520 - Should we? - I don't know. Should we? 453 00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:17,040 - I think... I think we should. - OK. 454 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:19,520 - I think I am. - Oh, my God. OK. - I think I am. 455 00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:22,160 - I think I'm doing it right now. - OK. Let me make sure... - Go! 456 00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:25,200 Of course she'd come back right now. Yeah, you're good. 457 00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:29,360 Hi. No, it's not Cindy. She's in the back. 458 00:21:29,360 --> 00:21:31,920 This is Ned, calling from her desk with a question. 459 00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:33,920 I hope you can help me. 460 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:35,680 Great, yes. 461 00:21:35,680 --> 00:21:38,640 Could you cross-check the different mattress names that you have on file 462 00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,400 against a model number I have here? 463 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,040 - Fantastic. Thank you very much. - Oh, my God. Ask for all of them. 464 00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:46,160 AP-182928. 465 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,040 Thank you, Amanda. Yes, I've got a pen. 466 00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:52,920 Yeah, yeah. If you could give me the different names. 467 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:55,000 Uh-huh, and what else? 468 00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,200 Oh, my God. Amanda, that's (BLEEP) great. 469 00:21:57,200 --> 00:21:59,720 Sorry, excuse my language. 470 00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:01,960 (LAUGHS) Thank you so much. (CLANKS HANDSET) 471 00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:06,720 ESMERALDA: Wow. (LAUGHS) So, we all agree, right? 472 00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:09,160 - KEN: Yes. - This is the end of the experiment. 473 00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:11,240 Bring back wire stories. 474 00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,320 Save money. Easy math. 475 00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:17,280 I would talk to Ned before we pull the plug on originals, but... 476 00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:19,360 he's AWOL. - Mm. - Mm-mm. 477 00:22:19,360 --> 00:22:21,440 - No other cuts in the budget? - No, sir. 478 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:24,440 It is airtight - like a puppy in a purse. 479 00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:26,400 (CHUCKLES) (CLEARS THROAT) 480 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:29,680 (CLEARS THROAT) OK. I did find one thing. 481 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:33,000 There's a line item for a storage unit... 482 00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:36,480 - Mm. - ..that, apparently, we've been renting for nine years. 483 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,840 Turns out, it's an apartment unit. 484 00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:42,320 This is actually a very funny mistake. Um... 485 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:45,520 So, what it was, was Enervate, if I recall correctly, 486 00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:48,440 rented me a very small furnished apartment 487 00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:51,360 for a couple of weeks when I first moved over from St Albans. 488 00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:53,640 And that, somehow - God knows how - 489 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,640 got filed as a warehouse. 490 00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:01,080 Oh, my God, can you even imagine if some of my stuff is still in there? 491 00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:03,080 (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) 492 00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:06,040 - No... - Huh, that's odd. 493 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:08,400 What's this? (GASPS) No. No, no. 494 00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:12,280 I mean, that's just... I think the simplest thing to do 495 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:14,400 would be to get rid of that. Um... 496 00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:17,520 Just in terms of...we don't wanna throw good money after bad 497 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:19,400 by looking into it, 498 00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:22,040 and hiring an investigator, or-or all of that sort of stuff. 499 00:23:22,040 --> 00:23:24,480 - OK. - So many we just put the money back into the newspaper. 500 00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:26,760 - Yay, journalism wins. - Hm, good! 501 00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:28,680 - Good! - Glad we figured that out. 502 00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:31,280 - I'm glad we figured that out. - I'm glad we figured it out. 503 00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:33,600 Wow. (LAUGHS) You're such a... 504 00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:36,520 little whizz-kid. - Ha! Whizz-kid. 505 00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:39,320 - I'm 55, but thank you. - So, little whizz-guy. 506 00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:41,400 OK. Fine. 507 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:44,680 I'm 59. Ya got me! (LAUGHS) 508 00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:52,800 Wow! OK. Y'all are still here. 509 00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:54,920 (LAUGHS) Don't you people have jobs? 510 00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:58,000 We should probably say that we are reporters from The Truth Teller, 511 00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,120 doing a story on consumer protection. 512 00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:02,760 I knew your mother wasn't sick. 513 00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:04,680 We confirmed with the Manufacturer 514 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,240 that your StayCool Hybrid FirmRest Foam is, in fact, 515 00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:09,760 the same exact model as the one at Twice Upon A Mattress. 516 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:12,440 Also, My Sleep Mattress, Hammock Matters, 517 00:24:12,440 --> 00:24:14,560 Got Your Back Mattress, Perfect Sleep Mattress, 518 00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:16,880 Cloud Evolution... - BOTH: ..and Pillow Mattress. 519 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,280 Which should qualify them for the price match guarantee. 520 00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:22,880 - They're the same bed. - OK. All right. So what? 521 00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:26,280 There's no proof...other than some scribbles on a piece of paper. 522 00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:28,200 If you wanna just... 523 00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:32,120 - And right over... - Oh, yeah. Mandy. - It's Mandy. 524 00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:35,360 Booyah! 525 00:24:35,360 --> 00:24:37,240 Shame on your ass! 526 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,200 - (voice cracks) All right. - Oh, no. 527 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:40,760 I um... 528 00:24:40,760 --> 00:24:42,880 - (softly) I actually hate this job. - Oh. 529 00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:46,840 I hate this stupid polo they make you pay for yourself. 530 00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:51,720 I was too scared to be a geologist, and now it's too late. 531 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:53,960 So... get your notepads out. 532 00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:56,840 Let's burn it all down. 533 00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,240 - Let's get some water. And then we can get into it. - Yeah. - I'll help. 534 00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:02,240 - Why don't we get some water? - I'm gonna write it too. 535 00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:03,920 - We're all good. - I'll write it! - Well... 536 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:16,960 Hey. 537 00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:19,760 I actually have a lot of work to do. 538 00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:21,720 It'll just take a second. 539 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:24,400 Um... So, it was hard to crack, but I think I figured it out. 540 00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:27,560 So, your two truths are... (TAPS PAD) 541 00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:31,200 ..you do hate camping, and you are allergic to pecans. 542 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:33,920 And the lie was um... 543 00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:35,640 you dated a married guy. 544 00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:41,200 Yep. 545 00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:43,200 You nailed it. 546 00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:45,360 There we go. Um... Thanks again. 547 00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:05,080 (KEYBOARD CLACKING) 'How do you sleep at night?' 548 00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,960 - That's great. - It is, isn't it? 549 00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:11,520 - It's great. - I thought it was. - Yep. 550 00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:13,920 God, I just hope Cindy finds peace. 551 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:15,760 (LAUGHS) 552 00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,360 (SIGHS) 553 00:26:17,360 --> 00:26:19,320 Listen, I have to be honest with you. 554 00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:24,320 I was, perhaps, a little overexuberant... 555 00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:27,480 earlier on with my 95% assessment 556 00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,960 of the paper's chance of success. 557 00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:32,200 Oh. 558 00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,320 The industry is in shambles. 559 00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:37,000 People hate reporters right now. 560 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:38,800 I mean, our staff... 561 00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:41,680 - ..sucks. - No, but it is what it is. 562 00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:44,760 95% was optimistic. 563 00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:46,920 Sure. 564 00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:49,080 It's probably closer to 85%. 565 00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:52,000 (BREATHES DEEPLY) (CLICKS TONGUE) 566 00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:53,840 OK. 567 00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:58,080 'Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm,' 568 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:01,640 according to a poster in my middle school hallway. -Ah. -So... 569 00:27:01,640 --> 00:27:05,400 -Mine said, 'Breakdancing will result in expulsion.' -Sure. -So... (LAUGHS) 570 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:07,800 I dunno. I'm young. 571 00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,880 The hospitality world'll always be there. 572 00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:12,720 OK, I'll see you tomorrow? 573 00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:16,680 Yeah. Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow. 574 00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:18,480 Cool. 575 00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,360 All right, buddy. 576 00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:25,360 Yeah, night, dude. 577 00:27:25,360 --> 00:27:28,680 Also...who could break up Buddy and the Dude? 578 00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:32,280 Yeah. I'm feeling good. 579 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:34,240 Another one down. 580 00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:36,560 We did good journalism. And... 581 00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:39,560 ..there's a budget meeting?! 582 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:42,280 Shoot. Uh... (DOOR CLOSES) 583 00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,280 (UPBEAT THEME MUSIC) 584 00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:49,080 (MUSIC STOPS) (LAUGHS) 585 00:27:49,080 --> 00:27:51,080 Shame on them. 586 00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:54,680 - Ann! - Right here, Marv. 587 00:27:54,680 --> 00:27:56,680 Don't fire Ned! 588 00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,800 You nev... You never told me to fire Ned. 589 00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:02,160 I would've written it in my book. 590 00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:05,720 Then who...who did we fire? 591 00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:08,000 Nobody? 592 00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:11,440 Good. 593 00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:16,200 (MUSIC RESUMES)