1 00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:06,760 Print is permanent, OK? 2 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:12,200 It's like true love. That's why my first issue here is such a big deal. 3 00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:15,120 - OK. - Hey. - Oh! That was fast. 4 00:00:15,120 --> 00:00:17,160 Just got a few things and threw them around. 5 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,320 - Hey, where did you get that? - Oh! Good eye. 6 00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:23,000 This is a 1926 Underwood Standard Portable 7 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:25,440 that once belonged- - I meant the coffee. 8 00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:29,120 - Where is there a Birch Brothers? - Just by me. 9 00:00:29,120 --> 00:00:32,280 Do they offer you a nerd discount if you mention your vintage typewriter? 10 00:00:32,280 --> 00:00:34,080 - A modest one. Yes. - Sure. 11 00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:39,600 - Hey. - Hey. - How is your new digs? 12 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,560 Oh, they're amazing. 13 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:43,520 Fit for a king. Ahem. 14 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:45,920 Just fine. Is everything OK? 15 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:47,760 - Everything is great! - OK. 16 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:49,920 - I have my couch, my desk. - Uh-huh. 17 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:53,000 Everything I need, and so close together now. 18 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,400 - That is good. - Yeah. 19 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,520 - Do you mind if I come in for a second? - Oh, please. 20 00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:58,280 - Just here? - Yeah, yeah. - Thanks. 21 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:04,560 So, um, I couldn't, uh, help, uh, but notice that yesterday... 22 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,400 ..there was a little tension. 23 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,200 But I'd like to be friends, if we can. 24 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:15,560 So would I. I mean, I...I would love to be friends with you. Oh! 25 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:18,760 That makes me so happy. 26 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:21,840 - Well, we're about to have my first staff meeting, if you... - Oh, wow. 27 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:24,880 I might skip it. 28 00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:26,840 Because they are like children, 29 00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:29,040 and I think it would be a trauma for them 30 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:31,520 o see two mommies at once, right? 31 00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:35,240 But you can catch me up later, maybe for lunch. 32 00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:37,720 - OK. Yes, let's do that! Let's do lunch. - OK. 33 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:39,200 - Fantastic. - Fantastic. 34 00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:41,720 - See ya, friend. - Ah! - Whoa! 35 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:45,400 Hello, welcome. Thank you for being here. Thank you for coming. 36 00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,200 Hello. Alright. 37 00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:50,600 Uh... 38 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:53,840 - Do you wanna join? - Um... 39 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:55,960 I... 40 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:01,360 OK. Welcome, volunteer print journalists, 41 00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:03,320 to your first staff meeting as reporters 42 00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:05,040 for the Toledo Truth Teller. 43 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:08,960 This is great. This is great. 44 00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:11,640 I, uh... I brought a few questions. 45 00:02:11,640 --> 00:02:13,760 How many of you have written for a paper before? 46 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:17,160 Uh-huh. Anyone else? 47 00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:21,000 I'm an accountant. 48 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:24,680 I don't know if my computer even has any word processing software. 49 00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:27,480 It can be any kind of paper. It can be a high-school paper. 50 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:29,320 Junior-high-school paper. 51 00:02:29,320 --> 00:02:31,600 I wrote a paper in junior high. 52 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:33,320 Not quite the same thing. 53 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:36,160 - I've tweeted. - You've tweeted. - I'm in a group text. 54 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:39,320 I'm gonna... Barry, I mean, you... 55 00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:42,560 you currently work as a reporter. 56 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:44,720 - Right? So that's... - Oh, yes. Yes. 57 00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:49,880 I'm a reporter for the Toledo Truth Teller, Ohio. 58 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:52,880 Great. This? 59 00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:56,560 This is terrific. 60 00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:03,080 Alright. Uh... 61 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,800 You know what, I thought that you could get to know me 62 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:08,440 by checking out three of my favourite ever issues 63 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:12,120 of this beautiful, historic paper. - Oh! 64 00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:14,080 "Shepard Orbits The Earth!" 65 00:03:14,080 --> 00:03:16,600 - "Doctor Salk Cures Polio." - That's good news. 66 00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:20,880 - "Victory in Europe!" - Mystery solved. 67 00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:25,960 - Huh? - I don't think we take framed antiques off the wall, do we? 68 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,600 What were you gonna do, auction them off? 69 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:32,480 - No. - No? - No. - I nearly called the authorities. 70 00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:35,440 - I nearly searched people's desks. - I'll put them back once we're done. 71 00:03:35,440 --> 00:03:38,680 Said the fox to the farmer. No, no, Ned. I'll put them back. 72 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,160 Thank you. 73 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:42,160 And I may electrify them. 74 00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:45,400 Or indeed electrify one, and you won't know which. 75 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,240 You know what? I think... 76 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:56,200 I think we'll leave it there for today. 77 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,160 Do they have more to learn than I originally thought 78 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:01,240 before they can replace our AP wire? Maybe. 79 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:04,280 But do you know who absorbs information even quicker 80 00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:06,560 than anyone else on the planet? 81 00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:09,680 Babies. Because they don't have any competing... 82 00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:11,560 anything. 83 00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:15,480 It's just blank, like the faces in that room. 84 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:17,480 - First issue, here we come! - Let's do it! 85 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:19,200 Whoa, easy there. 86 00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:21,080 Hey, can I have, uh... can I have some of this? 87 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,840 - Uh, yeah. Sure, dive in. - Yeah? Looks good. 88 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,800 That popcorn was a gift to Maria, 89 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:32,000 who had my desk before me, from Enrique, who used to work in sales. 90 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,960 They have two kids now. 91 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,280 Oh, ooh, the...the, uh... the Senate vote. 92 00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:38,280 Ooh, yeah. 93 00:04:38,280 --> 00:04:40,480 Huh. 94 00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:42,360 Um, there's no wire service. 95 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:44,200 What? 96 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:48,120 Yeah. Screw you, that's not a valid password. 97 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:49,600 I know my dog's birthday. 98 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:51,320 - Try again. - No. Look. 99 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:53,920 CNN, Bloomberg, AP, New York Times, no access. 100 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:56,600 Anytime I click it, it just says "Subscribe today". 101 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,120 - Hey, Ned. - Hey. 102 00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:01,280 For our lunch, um, do you like shellfish? 103 00:05:01,280 --> 00:05:04,640 Or are you more a sausage boy? 104 00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:07,520 - I'm a little distracted. Uh, the wire's not working. - Yeah. 105 00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:09,800 That was supposed to be a surprise. 106 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:13,360 But, uh, yes, I cancelled it. 107 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:16,520 You cut the wi...? You cut the wire? 108 00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:19,160 Yes. From my little office. 109 00:05:19,160 --> 00:05:21,240 You were so inspiring this morning. 110 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:23,520 I thought, we can do this. 111 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:27,200 We can write stories using our own imagination. 112 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:28,880 - And Marv is so happy. - No. 113 00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:31,120 This is a huge problem, Esmeralda. 114 00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:33,080 Oh, he's worried he won't get credit. 115 00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:34,960 - I gave you credit, duh! - No. No, no. 116 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:38,560 We need to find stories to send to print today, 117 00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:41,200 so that we can have a newspaper come out tomorrow. 118 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:42,960 It's my first issue, come on! 119 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:46,600 Why are you so anal? You will inspire something. 120 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:49,560 And I can't wait to read it. 121 00:05:49,560 --> 00:05:51,680 See you at lunch. 122 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:55,960 What's the deadline at the printing company? 123 00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:58,040 Six o'clock. 124 00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:00,240 Pacific? 125 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:03,200 Meeting resumed! Everyone back in the conference room, right now! 126 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:04,880 Meeting resumed. Same group as before. 127 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:36,600 After you all walked out earlier, I was, like, "You know what? 128 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:39,760 "What am I doing? These guys are ready. 129 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:42,720 "They don't need training. They just need assignments, right now!" 130 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,200 - Let's go! - Yes! 131 00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,960 - You can still use that. - Uh, is everything OK? 132 00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:49,520 Because your face is sweating and your neck is turning red. 133 00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:52,840 Yeah, thank you. That's... No, that's good observing. 134 00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:54,720 Any ideas at all, let's go. 135 00:06:54,720 --> 00:06:56,960 I saw a beautiful woman... 136 00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:58,680 driving a bus. 137 00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:00,880 That's an interesting thought. I think that perhaps 138 00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,720 we need something longer. It was good. 139 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:07,480 I couldn't find a parking space at the dog park today. 140 00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:10,400 That's the most boring thing I've ever heard in my entire life. 141 00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:13,360 - Eat an ass, Travis. - OK. Anything else? 142 00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:15,960 Uh, we could do a countdown to the McRib coming back. 143 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:17,720 Oh, I like that. 144 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:19,720 What? It'll pressure them. It's a good idea. 145 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,800 Yeah, it's an amazing idea, for the dumb ideas section. 146 00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:25,000 - Do we have a dumb ideas section? - Not yet. 147 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,880 We don't have a dumb ideas section. 148 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,880 Why don't we do a story about a local accountant 149 00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:30,800 who gets her car all keyed up by me tonight? 150 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:33,600 Uh, how about local everybody sick of fat guy 151 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:35,800 talking about his drone all the time? - That's not cool. 152 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,600 - You're right. Sorry. - I think we should keep on track here, OK? 153 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,480 There has to be an app that tells you 154 00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:42,720 what's going on around town, right? - Yes, yes! 155 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:45,240 - Everyone, on your phones. Technology will save us. - Neighbour. 156 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,640 - Citizen. - Nextdoor? - What's Citizen? 157 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:49,680 It shows you all the crime in your area, 158 00:07:49,680 --> 00:07:51,760 kinda like Pokémon Go, but for muggings. 159 00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:53,800 Oh, sh... I love Pokémon Go. 160 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:56,120 There's a man with a machete two blocks away from here. 161 00:07:56,120 --> 00:08:00,320 - Wait, I gotta create an account? - Uh... - Ooh. 162 00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:03,640 OK, Waze says there's a burst water main on Central and North Reynolds. 163 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:06,640 That's a nasty intersection. If you're ever in Toledo, avoid it. 164 00:08:06,640 --> 00:08:08,560 That's fantastic. You wanna go there now, 165 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:11,120 and get some quotes from some city workers, or something? 166 00:08:11,120 --> 00:08:13,560 - On it. - Oh, no, Barry. 167 00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:16,720 - I was talking to Mare. - I'll look into flights. - Both of you go. 168 00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:18,960 That's good. Get him out of the office. Great combo. 169 00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:20,760 No, we don't need to book a flight. 170 00:08:20,760 --> 00:08:22,680 that parking thing you were talking about. 171 00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:25,840 Go and see if anyone else has noticed. And try to get quotes. 172 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:28,480 - Remember the five W's. - Is that a gang? 173 00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:31,800 No. It's, uh, who, what, when, where, why. 174 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:34,000 It's what they teach you in journalism school. 175 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,160 So, not a gang. 176 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:39,000 I don't know if this is anything, 177 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:42,200 but they changed the fishing limit at the Wildwood Preserve. 178 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:45,080 -A law changed? -Yeah. -That's great. When were you gonna mention that? 179 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:47,440 I assumed everyone knew. It's on Fishchat. 180 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:49,720 Uh, did you get anything? 181 00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:53,920 No. I created an account. Now it says I need a minimum balance. 182 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:56,520 - Why don't you go with Travis. - OK. 183 00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:58,160 - I don't need this anymore? - No. 184 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:01,760 Alright, so that's... that's three stories. 185 00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:04,640 What about a letter from the new guy at the paper? 186 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:07,920 Fantastic idea! Yes! A letter from me, the new editor! 187 00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:11,640 And what you can do is you can get... You can... What can you do? 188 00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:14,920 Why don't you do the general crime scour? You're on crime app watch. 189 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,320 OK. 190 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:20,320 Seven highly motivated, tenacious Buckeyes are out there right now, 191 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:22,360 hunting for news. 192 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:25,440 You'd be a fool to bet against that. 193 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,240 Hey, how much would it cost for one day of wire service? 194 00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:30,280 That's outrageous. 195 00:09:30,280 --> 00:09:33,600 Hey, hey! Go! Go! 196 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:37,000 Drive safe! 197 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:41,800 How much water you think will be in the street? 198 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:44,400 Oh, God. 199 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,920 What a thing for a child to have to see. 200 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:48,760 Check your dingers for syphilis, kid. 201 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:51,440 If you don't know what that means, ask your Grandma. 202 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,440 Ugh, you know what? I wish I brought my waders. 203 00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:55,520 Waders, water main, syphilis. 204 00:09:55,520 --> 00:09:58,640 Listen, you're making me need to pee. Pull over. Quick. 205 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:02,160 Thanks. Come on, Barry. It's time to go. 206 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:06,200 I just hope I have half of Barry's energy and brains when I'm 150. 207 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:08,000 Argh! 208 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,760 - Agh! - Oh, my God. - Barry? 209 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:14,000 Ah, Jiminy Crickets. 210 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,880 Hey. 211 00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:20,000 - Did you find anything? - Well, uh, I'm a single woman living alone. 212 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:23,800 - OK. - Yeah, so I can't do this. 213 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:26,520 I can't go and look for crime in the city 214 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:30,440 because I need my bubble of ignorance. I like my bubble. 215 00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:33,120 I understand. We're just on a teeny-weeny bit 216 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,240 of a time-pressure situation here. 217 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,880 Right. So let's just switch assignments. 218 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:39,800 You want to write my letter from the editor? 219 00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,360 Sure. 220 00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:44,560 Uh, so here is the number for the police department, 221 00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:47,760 fire department, morgue, and poison control. 222 00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:57,800 - Truth Teller? - "Hey." 223 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:01,080 We got a problem. Um...Barry stepped on a crate and cut up his leg. 224 00:11:01,080 --> 00:11:02,880 - I had to call an ambulance. - I'm dying. 225 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:06,080 No, you're not dying. Also I should probably have your cell phone number 226 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,320 because Esmeralda listens on this line. 227 00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:11,040 "TTT, Truth Teller? 228 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:14,960 - "You picked up already." - Can you still get to the water-main break? 229 00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:18,640 - What? - Yeah. No, no. I know. Yeah, he made me promise to ride with him. 230 00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:20,720 OK, well, I mean... 231 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:22,760 could the ambulance swing by the water main break 232 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:26,520 on the...on the way to the hospital? - We don't have time for a pit stop. 233 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:30,000 OK. Well, get Barry settled and then check back in, OK? 234 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:32,120 Keep your eyes open at the hospital. Ask what's new. 235 00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:34,040 - Yeah. For sure. - Agh! 236 00:11:34,040 --> 00:11:36,120 OK. 237 00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:40,400 I've got five W's already. 238 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:45,240 - Help you guys? - Yeah. 239 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:47,320 We're reporters, local ones. 240 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:49,520 From local, here, Toledo. 241 00:11:49,520 --> 00:11:52,960 This is my reporter pad and, um... 242 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,200 Half the parking spaces for the dog-owning public 243 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:57,320 are being occupied by you guys, 244 00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:59,840 the, uh, department in the Parks Department. 245 00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:01,920 So what do you have to say about that? 246 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:04,680 Well, the spaces are for employees for us to unload our equipment. 247 00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:07,040 There's a sign right around there. 248 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:11,240 But there are plenty of spots out on the street. 249 00:12:11,240 --> 00:12:12,960 I'm not buying any of this shit. 250 00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:15,480 You can answer questions here, or down at the station. 251 00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:17,400 I gotta get back to work. 252 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:20,040 OK. Thank you... for your service, sir. 253 00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:23,400 We make a good team. 254 00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:27,520 How many broken windows, officer? 255 00:12:28,680 --> 00:12:30,640 That seems very low. 256 00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:33,840 Well, let me ask you this, would you say that the lower crime rate 257 00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:36,280 could be the result of increased police brutality? 258 00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:39,880 Hello? 259 00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,040 - Did you set everything up? - Yeah. 260 00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:44,320 We meet with the Assistant Fish and Game Warden at one. 261 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:47,400 Sick, thanks, man. 262 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:53,040 - Oh, you stepping it up, I see. - Yeah. 263 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:54,960 I just want to look polished, you know? 264 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:57,120 - I like it. Real professional. - Thanks, man. 265 00:12:57,120 --> 00:12:59,280 - Ah. Mr Moore? - Yes. 266 00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:02,280 - Assistant Fish and Game Warden Brewster, right? - Travis? 267 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:05,480 - Hello, Harper. How are you? - You know you're not supposed to be here. 268 00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:07,440 I'm here in my official capacity as a reporter. 269 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:09,640 OK? Not your ex-boyfriend. 270 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:11,960 You have to respect me as a member of the press. Alright? 271 00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:14,040 The first amendment compels you. 272 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:17,080 - Everything OK, here? - What's up, Gary. - I'm with Gary now, Travis. 273 00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:19,960 I'm just here to ask you guys some questions about fish. That's it. 274 00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:22,440 I warned you what would happen. Now I have to tune you up. 275 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:25,000 Wait, wait, wait. Hold a second, Gary! 276 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:28,200 OK, look, we're here as reporters. We got one question and we'll leave. 277 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:29,440 OK, yeah. 278 00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:32,960 Has the bluegill limit in the Lake Erie District changed recently? 279 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:35,040 You know that it has. What are we doing? 280 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:36,960 - That's great. - That's one question, we're done. 281 00:13:36,960 --> 00:13:40,240 That was a setup question, Gary. I obviously need to ask a follow-up. 282 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:43,120 - Go, yes! - Thank you. Follow-up. Harper... 283 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,640 is there any part of you that still loves me? 284 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:48,400 - Dude, I warned you! - Follow-up to that. 285 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:50,560 This is the guy that you chose? Are you kidding me? 286 00:13:50,560 --> 00:13:52,800 - Get out! - Yeah. - GARY: Get out now. 287 00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,960 Ow! Ow! Ow! My foot! Ow! 288 00:13:54,960 --> 00:13:57,080 I thank you for your patience. 289 00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:59,200 What? 290 00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:05,160 - Hey. - Hey. - Hi. - Hi. 291 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:07,800 Is Ned, uh, making you do this? 292 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:11,520 - Well, he's letting me. - Yeah. - Oh. Right. 293 00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,640 OK, um, I have a big emergency. 294 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:17,680 - Oh. - I need you to...to...to... 295 00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:20,160 defrost the freezer right now, immediately. 296 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,000 Well, can...can someone else? 297 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:26,800 I wish there was someone else I could trust with this. 298 00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:29,960 But no one defrosts like you, Nicole. 299 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:34,560 You have these young, sturdy, strong wrists. 300 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:39,480 I mean, Nicole, the ice melts at the sound of your footsteps. 301 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:41,640 The freezer's probably fine. 302 00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:45,680 But I like to take the path of least resistance with Esmeralda. 303 00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:49,080 Sometimes I go limp from resisting so little. 304 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:52,440 Just slide right off my chair. 305 00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:57,880 Well, if anything burns down in the next hour or two, 306 00:14:57,880 --> 00:14:59,760 you have my number. Thanks. 307 00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:03,120 Hey, hey. Is this the, uh...? Is this the morgue? 308 00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:06,720 Hey, have any bodies come in in the last 24 hours? 309 00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:09,560 No? 310 00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,520 Well, could you check again? 311 00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,520 I don't know, like check the back? 312 00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:19,760 Yeah. Like... Like, in a drawer that's unlabelled, or something? 313 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,200 Something could've slipped through the cracks. 314 00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:23,920 Please. You're not... OK. 315 00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:26,200 You're not even trying. Could you check the back again? 316 00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:29,160 If you look hard enough, I'm sure you'll find something. 317 00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:32,520 - Hey, Mr Busy. - Uh-huh. Oh, hey. 318 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:36,240 I just wanted to tell you that I'm very excited for our lunch. 319 00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:38,320 Oh, you know what, today's not a great day. 320 00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:40,160 Could we do it next week? 321 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:42,400 - Well, yes. For sure. - Thanks. 322 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:45,880 No problem. It's just that today I had invited Marv. 323 00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:49,600 And, uh, he wanted to make it a welcome lunch. So... 324 00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,560 probably he's going to be a bit disappointed. 325 00:15:51,560 --> 00:15:54,720 No, yeah. Yeah, let's do it. But just... Could we do it quick? 326 00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,520 Allora. In Italy, we think that if a man eats quick, 327 00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:00,760 he also finishes quick. 328 00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:07,040 So, then, Marv says, yes. 329 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:09,600 The pen might be mightier than the sword. 330 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:12,200 But without paper, what you gonna write on? 331 00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:14,400 Oh, wow, classic. 332 00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:15,800 - You alright, Ned? - Yeah. 333 00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:20,000 I'm just enjoying the lunch. Enjoying the long lunch. 334 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,960 Oh, well, I hope I didn't slow things down. 335 00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:25,120 I know that sometimes I can be a little picky. 336 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:27,880 I've never seen a piece of fish get sent back that many times. 337 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:30,200 But...it became interesting. 338 00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,400 And asking to have the head put back on the Branzino 339 00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:34,440 was perfectly reasonable, I thought. 340 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:36,720 - You know, I should go. I... Yeah. - No. 341 00:16:36,720 --> 00:16:38,960 - Esmeralda said you were staying for cigars. - Oh, yes. 342 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:41,880 - Down, boy. - I don't, really- - Have a cigar, mate. 343 00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:45,360 Marv, you don't know what he has planned. 344 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:47,240 I mean, it's galactic. 345 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:51,200 Only local news. That's why he cut the wire. 346 00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:53,000 He is a visionary. 347 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:55,840 They're called balls. They used to be standard equipment. 348 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:58,400 Pardon me. 349 00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:01,000 It's OK, I have them too. 350 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:03,000 I'm gonna... Could I take this? 351 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,760 - Go ahead. - Fantastic. 352 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:06,440 - Thank you so much. - It should be off. 353 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,960 Hello? 354 00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:11,680 "Is this the reporter who called before?" 355 00:17:11,680 --> 00:17:13,440 Uh, yes. Yeah. 356 00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:15,200 - "OK, here's something for you." - Mm-hmm. 357 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,360 "Someone called in bragging about a murder, 358 00:17:17,360 --> 00:17:19,240 "taunting us to find the body." 359 00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:23,520 Oh, my God. What, like a... like a serial killer? 360 00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,400 "We can't go that far. At this moment, 361 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:27,320 "it just amounts to a threatening creep." 362 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:29,440 But it could be a serial killer, right? 363 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,360 - This is fantastic! - "What?" 364 00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:33,960 This is awful. 365 00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:37,840 Have you come up with a catchy nickname for this creep yet, or...? 366 00:17:37,840 --> 00:17:39,880 "I'll call you back when we find out more." 367 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:42,560 Alright, thank you. Thank you. 368 00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:44,400 Whoo! 369 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:50,440 Uh, hey, guys. I'm terribly sorry, I'm gonna have to shoot off. 370 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:54,160 But I wanna say thank you for the cupcake, and for the record, Marv, 371 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:58,000 I think my first issue is gonna be pretty sweet. 372 00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,840 Alright, kid. 373 00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:06,640 Did you see the way he ate his cupcake? 374 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,280 - Visionary. - Mm. Yeah. 375 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:12,080 Excuse me. Can I have a doggy bag, please? 376 00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:16,720 Hey, you. You're young. 377 00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:19,200 You know the cool things happening around, right? 378 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:23,520 Is there anything new in the way of like, skating, tagging, drugging? 379 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:26,240 -We're journalists, looking for a story. -Tell us what we wanna know. 380 00:18:26,240 --> 00:18:28,800 - How much you paying? - Nothing. We're not even getting paid. 381 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,360 - Just answer the question. - OK, I see how it is. 382 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:34,880 Well, the new thing around here is, uh, Dogging, right, Ell? 383 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:37,680 Oh, yeah, yeah. Dogging. 384 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:40,520 - Everybody's doing it. - Mm-hmm. 385 00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:42,240 Yeah, I've never heard of that. What is it? 386 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:45,600 It's when regular teens like us just get together and act like dogs. 387 00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,720 Like this. 388 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:49,360 Are you being for real? Come on. 389 00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:52,120 - Ah-woo! - That's kind of interesting. 390 00:18:52,120 --> 00:18:55,160 - Oh, hey! Hey. - Hey. 391 00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:57,640 We've... We've got something really big! 392 00:18:57,640 --> 00:18:59,480 - We've got something huge. - OK. 393 00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:01,240 Sorry, it's just... 394 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:03,360 You were the first person I wanted... It's good news. 395 00:19:03,360 --> 00:19:05,160 That's great. What is it? 396 00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:07,920 There is a serial killer loose in town. 397 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:09,920 - Oh, God. - Obviously, it's terrible, 398 00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,080 but if it was gonna happen any day of the year, 399 00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:14,840 this is a good day for it to happen. - No, it's good. It's great. 400 00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:17,000 - OK. - Good news. 401 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:20,440 Um, it looks like we got something. 402 00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:22,640 That's a nice feeling. 403 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:27,760 - How'd it go? - Good. I mean, Gary Gladstone was selling his boat, 404 00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:30,400 so I sold him a two-column classified ad for every day 405 00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,640 until it sells. But it'll probably go quick. 406 00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:36,160 Oh! And Travis got arrested. So there's no story. 407 00:19:37,360 --> 00:19:39,600 - Yeah. - Well... 408 00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,320 - I mean, an ad's always nice. - Yep. 409 00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:44,360 And they call it Dogging. 410 00:19:44,360 --> 00:19:49,200 - "Slipping into a more..." - "A more canine way of being." 411 00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:52,040 "And the itch they're getting isn't from fleas." 412 00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:54,360 - Heh. "In most cases." - Ha ha! Yeah, that's good. 413 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:59,080 Um, just out of curiosity, did you guys get any quotes? 414 00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,320 What would the quote be? "Woof?" 415 00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:03,000 What? 416 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:06,600 Hey! 417 00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:11,560 - You're welcome. - Thank you so much. - Yes! 418 00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:16,920 I checked with the principals of two local high schools. 419 00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:19,040 None of this is real. 420 00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:24,760 Here's what Esmeralda left me. 421 00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:28,760 "Dear Toledo, my name is Ned Sampson. 422 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:31,760 "And I'm honoured to be the new Editor-in-Chief 423 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:33,760 "of The Truth Teller." 424 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:37,200 "Yesterday, I took over The Truth Teller because I felt like it." 425 00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:40,720 "And I would never say I stole this job from a woman." 426 00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:44,160 "I just want to extend my thanks to my predecessor..." 427 00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:47,240 "..Esmeralda Grand." 428 00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:50,840 "Esmeralda did the greatest job at the paper 429 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:53,560 "while also being a single mother. 430 00:20:53,560 --> 00:20:58,640 "Although, you would never know, because her body is insane." 431 00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:01,000 And it goes on like that for a while. 432 00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:06,640 Nothing? 433 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,040 I got sidetracked, by the freezer. 434 00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:12,680 OK. It's OK, the killer will save us. 435 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:23,440 Oh, my God, it's a coded letter from the killer. 436 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:25,760 Oh, no, sudoku. 437 00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:28,800 I don't, uh... I don't know if this is a trick. 438 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:32,160 It's probably copyrighted, 439 00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:35,120 or a series of numbers that causes a seizure, but... 440 00:21:35,120 --> 00:21:38,640 hey, the New York Times would've shut down without Wordle. 441 00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:42,480 Great. 442 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:47,080 Hey. Yes, that's me. Hold on. Mare? 443 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:49,440 Mare! It's the... It's the police, they've got more info. 444 00:21:49,440 --> 00:21:52,760 Hey, Nicole, you wanna come in here, maybe take some notes? 445 00:21:52,760 --> 00:21:55,560 I think my letter from the editor is about to get a lot more juicy. 446 00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:56,960 Hang on. 447 00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:00,160 Alright. We're ready. 448 00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,400 "OK, so here's what I know. 449 00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:04,840 "We suspect a murderer because of a tip from the morgue." 450 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:06,960 - OK. - "This creep called in, 451 00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,320 "claiming there was an undiscovered body." - Oh, my God, what did he say? 452 00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:13,160 "He asked them to look in every drawer like he had hidden a body 453 00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:15,480 "and was waiting for them to find it." 454 00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:17,240 Oh. 455 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:19,360 "The morgue worker described his voice 456 00:22:19,360 --> 00:22:21,200 "as really breathy and insistent." 457 00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:22,880 - Oh, no. - "They tape incoming calls. 458 00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:24,840 - "This is what it sounded like." - Mm. 459 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:26,840 "Hey. Is this the morgue?" 460 00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:31,320 Hey, um, that doesn't sound too bad to me. 461 00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:33,960 Maybe let me know if he calls back. 462 00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:36,280 Thanks. 463 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,440 I don't think this story is gonna pan out. 464 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,800 'It's 5:38.' 465 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,160 Don't know what we're gonna print. 466 00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:47,560 Oh, you know what? I think I'll type up the train schedules, 467 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:49,680 just to be safe. Sorry. 468 00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:54,920 "Hi, Toledo. My name is Ned. I'm the new editor here. 469 00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:58,800 "There's an old saying that 'no news is good news.' 470 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:00,640 "It's not something you'd usually hear 471 00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:03,320 "from the new editor-in-chief of the town newspaper." 472 00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:05,440 It's like having homework every day, forever, 473 00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:07,040 until the paper fails and I lose my job. 474 00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:09,240 - Ah. - Whoo! 475 00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:12,280 "And to be honest, it wasn't what I was planning on writing to you all, 476 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:16,200 "in this, the very first printing of the revived Toledo Truth Teller." 477 00:23:17,120 --> 00:23:19,440 "However, as I sit here typing these words, 478 00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:21,320 "I think that today's events, 479 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:25,360 "or to reiterate, the lack thereof, were actually a gift." 480 00:23:25,360 --> 00:23:29,280 "A slow news day is a sign that your city is filled with safe, 481 00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:31,440 "kind people who treasure their community." 482 00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:37,240 Did you get my text? 483 00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:40,360 I made it! Heh! It's in today's paper. 484 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,880 Well, is it too easy? Is it too hard? 485 00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:46,560 What do you think? Huh? 486 00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:48,680 Maybe too easy for you, Stanley! 487 00:23:48,680 --> 00:23:51,240 "So, we're not gonna drum up salacious headlines 488 00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:53,400 "just to get your hard-earned cash. 489 00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:55,400 "We're gonna print what really matters to you. 490 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,080 "And I'm not gonna ramble to fill space. 491 00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:01,320 "If I wanted to do that, I would just talk about Elmore Leonard, 492 00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:04,080 "and one of his great books set in the area, 493 00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:05,760 "like 52 Pickup, 494 00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:08,040 "where a Detroit businessman named Harry Mitchell 495 00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:11,200 "finds out that he's being blackmailed by a trio of criminals 496 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,200 "who discovered that Harry was having an affair 497 00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:14,800 "with an exotic dancer." 498 00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:16,880 You know what? I read an article you wrote. 499 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,600 About the first time the astronauts drove on the moon. 500 00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:22,080 - It was so good. - Yeah. 501 00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:25,000 '71. 502 00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:30,240 "Astronauts tour beautiful valley in first lunar motor trip." 503 00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:32,560 Hmm. 504 00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:35,280 "When the crooks try to frame Harry for her murder, 505 00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:38,000 "instead of paying them off, Harry decides to get even. 506 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,720 "It's vintage Leonard, with a taut prose style 507 00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:44,400 "and well-placed plotting that keeps you turning every page. 508 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:48,240 "It was published in 1974 by Phoenix Paperbacks. 509 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:54,240 "ISBN 9-7-7-8-0-7-5-3-8-1-9-6-2-3." 510 00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:56,600 "Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera." 511 00:24:58,240 --> 00:24:59,640 Yikes. 512 00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:03,920 Yeah. It wasn't perfect, but it was his first issue. 513 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:06,680 And it was all of our original work. 514 00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:10,000 Except for the first three chapters of Get Shorty. 515 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:11,520 It wasn't even a review. 516 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:14,080 He just quoted his favourite novel without permission. 517 00:25:20,120 --> 00:25:22,520 Woof! Woof! Woof! 518 00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:24,840 Woof! Woof! Woof! 519 00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:29,000 Let's go! Let's go! 520 00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:32,640 Uh, Jessie, let's go. We're leaving. Come on! Now! 521 00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:34,520 That's rude.