O Doctor!
Move back.
Or I'll run you over.
Try to.
Go ahead. Run me over.
Move back....
...or I'll really really do it.
You have your own parking space.
Park there.
I've kept my export merchandise there.
Understood?
Move back.
I'm in a hurry.
Look, I'm asking nicely.
So many other vacant parking lots.
Why inconvenience me.
- Good morning. - Good morning.
Good morning.
I know the real you, doctor.
I do.
So?
What will you do?
Just get lost.
Why do you want to get thrashed?
Scoundrel!
I too can hit you.
I'm parking an expensive car in your spot.
At least thank me.
Say thank you.
- For using my space? - Yes.
First write an application.
In triplicate.
And I will reject them all.
This is my parking lot, scoundrel.
My parking lot!
If you have the balls, buy a new car...
...and park it here.
Till it's free, I'll do as I wish.
- Because it's free? - Yes.
If I don't do my wife, you will do her?
Park in my space now.
And only I will do my wife!
What happened, baby?
Tea?
Okay.
Bloody youth
Baby, you say I love you all day.
Chetan will be there in 10 minutes.
I'm at work. Hang up.
Will a coconut get in there?
- Idiot! - Idiots, come here.
Listen up...
...if you don''t find the coconut, right?
What?
You won't get even a cup of tea.
Look everywhere, carefully.
Yes, sir.
Yes DG, Tambe here.
I've called up. No need to announce.
Tell me.
Did you find that coconut?
No, DG...
We looked all over. The coconut isn't here.
Bring the watchman here.
Is it? Okay, I'm coming.
Listen up,...
...search every corner of the building.
I want the coconut.
Understood?
- Yes, sir. - I'll go to the station.
Coolio.
Sir.
What did English Tambe tell you?
You people have to find the coconut.
Get to work.
We looked everywhere...
... found nothing.
Wait, let's see where he goes.
Brother.
What?
I want to sell this.
I too want to sell all this.
Such a big shop...
..is meant to buy your stuff?
This is a top quality product.
Self prescription for 3 cc dose.
Thin needle, hurts less.
- You... - Don't teach me.
I'm a chemist. I sell these things daily.
Scoot now..
I've done a masters in pharma.
That's not my problem.
Now don't bug me.
I already have a stomach bug.
Do you have constipation or loose motions?
Or just rumbling...
..because if it's paining here, you have gas.
If it's paining here...
You moron, just go.
Your wish.
The neighbouring chemist...
...knows me. I'll sell this to him.
That is also my shop.
Is it?
Brother, you're great.
Keep it as it is.
For free.
- For free? - Yes.
You're done something wrong.
I've done what I had to.
Keep this.
Or should I...?
No, leave it.
Go.
What's your name?
Vijay.
Do you want my father's name and address?
Vijay bro, control your temper. Or you'll get more acidity..
Take my word.
- You won a lottery today. - Buzz off.
Like everyday, you made a two-egg omelet.
And poisoned his food!
No..
Then you came downstairs.
Your boyfriend said. you were so daring
...push the daring more.
Rob some money also.
Sir, nothing like that.
Don't say that.
WWF!
Who asked you to sit? Get up.
Get up, fu@$%.
What did you say that day?
A watchman is above the police?
Squat like a hen.
Do it.
- Hen... - Sir, he can't.
Why?
His pants are tight.
You know it's tight?
It's tight.
You see this stick...
I'll shove it up and your body will melt to margarine.
Do you understand?
What have I done, sir?
What have you done!
Should I tell you?
You charmed the girl and did this, right?
Right?
Why would I do that?
I'm a family man.
I have a wife.
She lives in Jaipur with my daughter Ojasvi.
I love her a lot.
So this is a casual side thing for you?
Casual?
What?
Didn't you promise to marry her?
What?
No? You didn't?
You didn't?
When?
Didn't you say, Kamini dear, you cook well?
Does praising cooking mean a promise to marry?
Then?
Why did I cook for you then?
Sir, I made so many things from YouTube!
Veg au gratin, spinach sushi...
...banana custard...
- With banana. - What's it called...
Veg special stuff... Why did I make all that?
How would I know why you made that?
You did it willingly.
Is it?
So innocent....
Sir, now...
He took me to a movie on Sunday. I came, didn't I?
Did I refuse?
You weren't married on Sunday.
You have a marital day off on Sundays!
Enough now. Keep quiet.
Stay quiet?
Who was clinging on in the cinema hall?
Who wanted to have boiled corn at the beach?
Who said I dream of your body, babe?
Did I?
- Look... - No, right?
Don't lie to the Inspector.
Sir, I'll tell you the truth?
Dear, this is a police station.
If you don't tell the truth here, where will you?
Out with the truth.
Sir, I fell for his physique.
What's wrong with that?
Is it?
I had a crush on him.
My husband is all skin and bones.
A boring body he has.
Why did you go downstairs the first time?
Sir, she directly said her boss died.
Who says that?
No lies!
No lies.
I saw the video.
What did you give her secretly?
What was it?
Sir, she brought money.
It was 4,000 bucks.
There was a 2,000 note...
...three of 500...
...and three of 100 and some change.
What wrong did I do?
He'd ask me money for protein shake.
Don't lie.
Did I ask you to get protein shake from the corpse?
Bring the protein from the corpse... Of course you did.
Shut up.
Quiet.
Why did you go down the second time?
He said.
- What? - He said he's a devotee of lord Hanuman.
How can I build my body with a corpse's money?
He said keep it back so I did.
When did I say I'm a devotee of Hanuman?
Now you're not a devotee also?
- He's not. - Whether I am...
...or not, why do you care?
Why would I tell you?
Who else will you tell?
That's for me to decide.
- How can you decide? You have nobody. - We spent a few days together...
- ...so don't pile on to me. - A few days!
Sir, listen to him.
I know your wife and child.
- I'll tell them. - You are after me, understood?
I am after you?
Bloodyy liar!
You'd give me flying kisses.
She's hug me all the time, sir.
- He's so innocent. - She scratched me all over.
Jadhav, take them out.
Move.
Get out.
- Move. - He's a liar, sir.
He seduced me.
You also...out.
Out..
- Sir... - Out.
Out.
He doesn't understand love.
Turned this into a fish market.
Find it quickly.
Look for a coconut.
Don't throw trash out.
You found pizza!
Thinking of food.
Find a coconut.
Keep both.
I'm a family woman.
You too have a family.
I'm sure you understand.
Yes.
I have a family.
My wife left me.
Since then they are my duty...
Kamla, Vimla,...
...Sarla...
Do they go to school?
Nope, to the club.
Pub.
Sometimes to hotels too.
Tambe sir has many girlfriends.
Right, sir?
Patil, did you overeat?
Look away.
Only one life, dear.
Enjoy.
C'mon!
Keep your hands properly.
Is this your dad's house?
Press hard.
Guide her.
Interrogation is on, sir.
Yes, we're searching.
We'll find it, sir.
Yes, sir.
Yes.
Yes, sir?
What?
No, sir.
I'll tell you in 2 minutes.
2 minutes.
No, sir.
But we found something else.
Yes.
One must not print personal stuff in office.
Tea.
- Hey! - What?
Do you want tea?
I want to talk.
Go ahead.
I want to talk to you.
Me?
Okay.
Come here.
- I want to talk privately. - Privately?
Why do you repeat everything?
Repeat?
- Come to the conference room. - Conference room?
- Come to the conference room. - Why?
Why are you closing the door, sir?
Hey...
Take it off.
Take off your pants.
What are you saying, sir?
Take it off.
- Take off your pants. - No, sir.
Sir....
Sir, control yourself.
Sir, I'm not that type of a guy.
I know what type of a guy you are.
- No! - Take it off and I'll show you...
No, I don't want to see.
I swear! No!
Sir...
What are you doing?
Take off your pants.
What are you doing?
Hey....
That hurts.
It hurts.
- Hurts? - Yes, sir.
You think.
...I want to be gentle?
Sir, I can do that too.
I'm warning you.
-I can do it too. - Really?
Because of you, she's naked.
- I didn't do anything. - Her skirt...
You...
Stop!
Sir, what are you doing?
Sir, no....
I am not that type of a man.
- Will you take it off or not? - Okay.
If you insist,...
...what can a man of my status do?
Talking big things!
You're a thief.
-Thief? - Yes.
A shameless thief.
You're wearing my pants right before me!
Sir, wait a second.
Wait.
- Which pants? - There are only two pairs of pants here.
I wearing one and you're wearing the other.
And both are mine.
What proof do you have?
Proof? I have photos on my phone.
-Want to see? - No.
Sir...
Two men can buy similar pants, sir.
Is it? Vextid
It's from Vextid
Do you even know the spelling?
If you talk about status,...
...let me tell you,...
...your salary after tax deduction...
...and my salary with tips...
...are almost same.
- Is it? - Yes.
- Forget that - Sir...
- Take off my pants. - Sir, what are you doing?
VEXTID.
- What's that? - The spelling.
Look...
...her skirt came off.
- Her skirt came off. - I didn't do anything.
I'll call the police.
- Yes. - You'll call the police?
I'll do that for you.
Go ahead.
Wait.
Hello.
Magic!
I was calling you.
And here I am.
How are you?
I was passing by.
So I thought I'd say hello.
Hello.
One second.
Sorry, sir.
I will dry clean and return your pants.
Everyone is missing you..
Hey!
I too am missing them.
- Shall we? - Where to?
Police station.
This is office time.
- How... - Is it?
Listen up,...
....can I take him for sometime?
We're unable to solve a riddle.
Amazing criminal mind.
Let's go.
I must salute your smartness.
That's what my mom says! None is smarter than Sonu.
- Is it? - I'll just get the lunch box.
My God! In our office,...
We have criminals in our office, Aanchal.
I know, right!
So exciting!
Exciting?
It's risky.
Don't be boring.
- Risky is awesome, babe. - Risky is...
It's sexy.
What's life without a little risk?
I'm warning you, stay away from him....
...if you know what's good for you.
What's good for me?
I've had enough...
...of what's good for me.
Bad.....
...is now good for me.
''I am a bad girl and I don't give a damn!''
Forgive me, it's lunch time.
Hello.
We ordered food for you. Don't mind.
I got food.
No problem.
We ordered for you.
Your favourite.
What?
Chinese.
Chinese?
Wow.
I got okra.
Have it.
You eat.
Sonu!
Excuse me.
Won't you guys eat?
No, you eat.
It's your favourite, right?
Chinese.
Some more?
Gravy.
Will you really not eat?
Hey... Sorry...
Patil,...
...how can one have Chinese without sauce?
Get the sauce.
Yes.
You said it broke.
We found the whole bottle....
...from the pigeon.
I was also wondering where it went.
Good you found it. From the building?
That's mine.
What are you doing?
That will enhance the taste.
Mr Tambe!
Bromethalin.
C14 H7 BR3 F3 N3 O4.
Neurotoxic rodenticide.
Molar mass 577.93 gms per molecule.
Keep away from children.
Do not eat... No, do not consume.
This is what you said that day.
Enjoy.
How...
Have it or I'll feed you.
But how can I have this?
This is....
Get up!
What did he say that day?
Can't sleep. That fat rodent has to be killed.
I'll kill that fat rodent today.
Yes.
Sonu,...
...why so many syringes in your house?
It's so simple.
You do drugs?
No.
I never do. You shouldn't either.
He doesn't do small crimes, DG.
- He directly murders. - Right?
I'll tell you.
I was a medical rep in this company until two months ago.
Then Blush Cosmetics hired me as sales manager with a 15% hike.
15%
One box was left with me when I quit.
I'd take syringes and this medicine...
...and mix in flour balls to kill rats.
When the rodent died, I had no use of the syringes.
10 years...
When you go inside for 10 years...
...you'll have enough time to spin such yarns.
- Interesting stories. - Mr Tambe, this is no story.
- It's true. - Look,...
...any printing press can print such fake stuff.
ID, passport, documents anything you want.
- Right? - Oh no.
Check it.
I'll check.
What was your boss' name?
Ravi Kulkarni.
Hello.
Hello, I'm calling from Godbole Road police station.
Sharma, fu$%#@. Stop your pranks.
This is Inspector Tambe, you fu#@.
Mind your tongue.
Sorry, sir.
Are you Ravi Kulkarni?
Yes.
Did Sonu Singh work for you as a medical representative?
Yes.
Yes, sir.
He quit two months ago.
He was our best employee.
Tell the truth.
I am telling the truth, sir.
Put it on speaker.
Hello, Ravi sir.
- Sonu, how are you? - Fine and you?
Great.
Sonu, I got a call from the police station.
- The police are looking for you. - There's nothing to worry, sir.
I am with them right now.
All well, Sonu?
Yes, sir. Did you get a raise?
- Sonu, what raise... - Hello...
Sir,...
...best employee, best salesman, best behaviour.
I won three awards in one year.
And you, sir,...
What?
Should I apologise now?
Should I apologise?
Oh no! No sorry, thank you or loan in friendship.
I added the last one.
There's no friendship, okay?
You're in the police station.
Hey buddy!
Best employee.
Come here.
Sir.
What's your number?
9820...
...008008.
007+1
Answer on the first ring.
Give a missed call.
Here.
- Tambe. - Chetan Tambe.
Chetan Tambe.
I have great jokes. I'll forward them to you.
Give me that card.
I gave you.
New one.
Sales Manager.
Go now.
His mothers'...
Suzy!
I want all the heads in my cabin now.
Look at this.
Just look at this.
Don't just look at this. Say something for god's sake.
My daughter...
...found this 2 days ago.
Mumbai four, Mumbai five, Mumbai six, Mumbai seven.
Mumbai eight.
Someone is leaking our strategy.
Now...
..which department...
..is responsible...
...for the leak?
Is it marketing...
..manufacturing...
..promotions, R&D...
...distribution...
...or sales?
No, sir.
No, sir!
6 departments and no one can take...
....accountability.
Sir, we'll get to the bottom of this.
No.
I will.
Tomorrow.
I'm personally going with my daughter...
...to find this process.
When I catch them,...
...I will kill that asshole.
And then I will sack each and every one of you jokers.
What seems to be the problem, Mr Iyer?
That's all right, I mean...
Not in this form,...
....not in this society.
- But... - No need to be extra progressive, ...
...Mr Wadhwani.
Okay.
I'd heard this is a perfect society.
So I decided...
Anyway,...
Hello, bad boy.
Today is Friday.
After Thursday...
May I?
Oh dear..
Darling.
May I...
...ask you out?
Dirty.
Very.
1,2,3,4,5,6
That's all.
6 boys and 2 girls.
6 boys and 2 girls?
Not allowed. Step aside.
Move aside.
Let us go please.
Side. - We've come from far distance.
Hey...
Can't boys party without girls?
They can... at home.
Move aside.
We too feel like partying out sometimes.
Then go to a local bar.
Leave.
- Listen, can I use the bathroom.. please? - Nope.
You will let extra girls go in?
Sure.
So, who will those extra girls inside talk to?
Take this half wit away.
Mind your manners.
- No... - Manners..
It's nothing. Let's go.
Mind your manners. - Bro.. Bro..
Wait a minute.
Wait.
Just wait.
Yes.
Hello, Sub-inspector Tambe, my friend.
Rascal,...
- ...tell me. - I'm here, at Happy Bar.
Okay so?
The security guy won't let me in. Me!
Your friend.
You...
Rascal, give him the phone.
Give it to the security guy.
- Here. - Talk to the police.
- Hello, sir. - Listen.
Let Sonu Sir inside.
- I'll be there in some time. - Yes, sir.
Okay, sir.
Sorry, sir.
I'll see you.
- Yes, okay, sir. - I will see you later.
The same old apple and strawberry.
Get some local flavours.
Kalakhatta, aamras...
Uncle,...
...this is not a juice centre.
Do you even know what this is?
This is not meant for kids.
I am neither a kid nor foolish.
And your Indian mentality...
Don't mix it with imported stuff.
How old are you?
You haven't even grown facial hear yet!
17... and for that you don't need facial hear.
Shut up.
The legal age is 18.
Understood? Do your parents know of this?
Uncle, as per a survey by a leading Indian analytical Indian brand,...
...44% teenagers have sex before the age of 18.
42% teenage girls have sex between the age of 15 to 18...
...and in teenage guys the number is 44%
And parents are fine with children having sex now.
Back in 2005, the number was 25%
As per 2019 census, it's 48.76%...
...parents are fine with premarital sex.
Get your facts right, uncle.
Give me a pack of ultra thin.
Hello, lover.
This is a men's washroom.
I know.
If you know, then go.
What are you doing? People might come in.
Let them.
Why are you here?
Oh..
Toothpaste before the party?
Okay.
Not toothpaste, baby, just pasted.
What are you doing?
Not this one.
It's craziness.... craziness. Craziness"
You're two timing me!
Move! What's special about her?
Will you go out with her again?
You didn't answer my call for 2 days and now you're with her!
- You... - What are you doing?
I'll show you! Witch, eyeing my man...
B****!
I'll show you.
B****.
- Wait, I'll show you. - "I can't hold on any longer.".
- I'll show you. I'll show you. - "I have your initials tattooed on my hand.".
- You'll remember me forever. - Witch!
Leave...
Leave.
Leave...
Leave.
Leave I say.
Let go.
Sonu, now that we've spent so much time together...
...let's spend our lives together.
So many feelings, so many boys, Sonu, but I've never felt like this.
I'm nervous and excited.
I've never lost my virginity but..
...I want to lose it with you.
It's itching.
Playing hard to get!
I like it.
Move.
Show me some moves, Sonu.
I was the best dancer at Khuchhu bro's wedding.
You are my Cutu...
Sonu, where is our relationship going?
Toothpaste.
Want more?
Not toothpaste, baby, just pasted.
Reset my eyes.
I'd rather reset you.
C'mon dance, Sonu.
Sonu!
I love crazy bad boys like you, Sonu. I love them.
Sonu!
Gurleen!
- Sonu! - My friend Aanchal.
Hi.
Just friend?
Why can't you tell them the truth?
Go girl!
- Go! - My friend Aanchal.
- C'mon, dance. Dance with me.
You are a party animal.
- Sonu! - Gurleen, you came this late.
Don't have singing practice early morning?
I do.
Look I got hot water.
You and your hot water!
Aanchal...
Dance
You told me you're a party animal.
Then I'll have to interfere and it won't do you any good.
I have police contacts.
Where are you looking?
Come with me.
"She has obliged me."
Who was that?
Neighbour. - "She has become our guest."
Her parents won't give her freedom.
I'm not interested.
And it's very important for girls to have freedom. Very important.
And what about me?
What about me, Sonu?
You don't know anything.
You don't know how badly I waited for someone like you.
You want me to share you?
No, sorry. I can't.
Sharing is not caring, Sonu.
I want to break up.
What all I did for you....
...and you... You only see that Gurleen!
That plain Jane you met a few days ago!
I gave you my body, soul and wealth.
Body, when you gave?
This is over.
- It's over. - Okay.
I want to tell you something.
The spelling of Happy is wrong.
Hapi!
There.
''Droplets of rain fell''
''The water ignited fire''
''Droplets of rain fell''
''The water ignited fire''
''The heart was set on fire''...
"And it missed you."
''Droplets of rain fell''
''The water ignited fire''
''The heart was set on fire''...
"And it missed you."
Let's party.