[boing]
And now Dreamworks' The Penguins of Madagascar.
[bell tolling]
[brassy detective music]
- Hit it. - ♪ Hey-oh, yah, hah ♪
- ♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪ - Yeah.
♪ Hey-oh yeah, oh-hey-oh ♪
[brassy detective music]
[camera shutter clicks]
Cute and cuddly, boys.
[chomping] Num, num, num!
♪ Peanuts are so yum-yum ♪
♪ I keep them in my tum-tum ♪
♪ Da-da-dum ♪
Wha-- [screams]
Ooh, that doesn't bend that way!
Good work, boys. We've captured the elephant.
If you guys want some peanuts, just ask.
- Oopsy. - False alarm.
Seems to be a calibration error.
computer: Alert! Enemy detected! Alert!
Here we go. Enemy movement in zone two.
I calibrated, all right?
Move! Move! Move!
The blood's rushing to my trunk.
computer: Alert! Enemy detected!
False alarm.
computer: Alert! Enemy detected!
False alarm.
computer: Alert! Enemy detected!
Uh...
computer: Alert! Enemy detected!
[whimpering]
[frog croaking]
Stop going off!
Kowalski!
Your new alarm doodad is targeting the entire zoo!
I can't even hear my own voice anymore!
Am I yelling?!
I want to be yelling! Make sure I'm yelling!
Hey, what?
I don't understand. The science is so simple.
Hey!
Built-in bio-emoticon sensors
scan a subject and instantly detect
if they are a friend or enemy.
[giggles] Silly, silly, Kowalski.
Friendship is recognized by our hearts.
Even a newborn Lunacorn knows that.
Permission to slap the Private, Skipper?
computer: Enemy, enemy, enemy, enemy, enemy...
I'll show ya how to fix it.
Agh!
Skipper!
Did that... hurt?
computer: Enemy, enemy, enemy!
Ah! Get back! All of you!
Don't come any closer!
What are you do-- [gulps]
Nice try, but ya won't take me that easy, you...
- enemies. - Enemies?
Enemies.
Rude. What got into him?
Gadzooks! There's the problem!
I accidently installed the bio-emoticon sensor backwards.
That's why the alarm thinks friends are enemies!
[chuckles] Classic me.
But why did Skipper attack us?
The alarm programming must have downloaded into Skipper.
Which means... [gasp]
His sense of friend and foe has been reversed!
Enemies!
I need backup!
Someone I can trust with my life.
Hansie's log:
evil plan 204 to defeat the penguins has failed.
You're always trying to finish it with the fish, Hans.
Let the fish go already!
Hiya, Hans!
[surprised exclamation] Skipper!
- What are you-- - There's my best buddy!
Best buddy?
Yeah, you and me, ol' chumly.
We're the dream team!
Oh, I see. This is a dream.
Specifically, the secret one I have
where you and I are B.F.F. Chumsy-wumsies.
Oh, you didn't hear me say it.
So what do you say?
Ready to lay the smackdown on some penguin foes?
Okay, I'll go with it.
Skipper is an expert at anti-tracking footwork,
thus, we must search for him using a one-footed,
counter-clockwise, flippy-flop waddle pattern.
[giggling] Look at me!
And just what are we supposed to do
if Skipper goes all commando on us?
Uh, Maurice. Look.
Ow!
Fear not, Maurice.
I need merely attach one of these
scientifically designed suction...
uh... thingies to Skipper
and he will re-zap to his normal, friend-detecting self.
Yes?
Great move, palsy!
Stay frosty, mi amigo.
We're surrounded by hostiles.
Amigo?
Yeah, I am his primo amigo!
[gasp] Hans stole our friend!
Deploy B.F.F. Handshake!
Go!
[evil laugh] Zap, zap, zap!
[hysterical laughter]
Hey, shut up down there!
I'm trying to count the royal Zs!
Ugh! 111, 112...
- [explosion] - For the love of mercy, help!
You too, Maurice. Geezy louisey.
Rico, try a knock-out bomb!
Okay!
Oh, wait a minute.
Oh, na-na-- oh, no, no!
[explosion] [groans]
[yells]
Make your move, you tea-time turncoat.
Hey-ya!
Ah, come on.
I meant punch or something.
I won't do it, Skipper.
Just like the Lunacorns say,
friendship is the art that's in our hearts!
And that's not all they say on the topic of friendship.
Remember?
Remember...
my... friends...
Agh!
Ah!
[yells]
Those fiendish penguins escaped.
But don't worry, there's a whole zoo of foes to round up.
Yay for besties!
Mm-hmm.
♪ La la-la la-la la la ♪
♪ La la-la la-la ♪
♪ La la-la-- ♪
♪ La ♪
I don't wanna go back in the tree!
Ha ha ha! I just wanna talk.
[spits] Egads! They've captured the whole zoo!
Skipper never took wacky photos with me.
I mean, what are we going to do, Kowalski?
I'm out of options.
We simply can't get close enough
to zap Skipper with the alarm.
Ah!
[humming]
Hey-hey! Ringtail, my mammal!
Lookin' sharp, my friend.
Hey-hey! Back at you, feather fish!
[happily humming]
Alien abduction!
So... you are saying the Skipper is all whackadoo backwards
and thinks his fishy-stink-pal-guys
are the enemies?
Yes, but not you!
It would appear Skipper thinks you are a close friend.
But, eh... wait.
Let me unpack that in my brain a little.
Hmm...
I think that would not mean
he is not thinking I am a friend in the real lifes.
Um, roughly.
[gasp]
Whatever, I am not caring!
I said I'm not! So stop asking me about it!
Would you let it go, man? That's so ridiculous.
I don't care!
Excuse me, my eyeballs have the sneezes.
Achoo. Achoo.
I do not care. I am a rock.
[slurp] Ah!
Nothin' like the satisfying taste of cold justice.
Could use some more herring though, not to be a whiner.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, I know just the place!
It's a bit far, but the fish is the fishiest.
Be right back... buddsy-wudsy.
Finally!
I thought he would never be leaving.
Ringtail! Bro! What are you doing here?
Uh, I am not distracting you
from secrety penguin maneuver-ings,
that is for certainly!
- Eeh! - Ha ha ha!
No! I love you, man.
[chuckles] Say what, now?
I love you! Come on!
Your mangled language, your party attitude,
your dance-like gyrations.
I dig it all!
[whimpering] You... like me?
I love you, man! Duh!
What kind of sad mixed-up world would this be if I didn't?
I changed my mind! Penguins!
[gasp]
Hyah!
Once you dark souls are shipped off,
I can fill this place with some real friends.
Real friends, Skipper?
Yeah, like the rats, and Savio,
and that awesome Officer X dude.
But, Skipper, they're your enemies!
Nice try, actual enemy. It's always the quiet ones.
I don't wanna hear it!
Hey, Skipper, check it. Dance confetti!
Am I thinking what you're thinking?
'cause I'm thinking we throw down a majorly
two-buddy Congaga line, eh?
Oh, yeah! Congaga approved.
Oh, yeah, man!
- Congaga. - Yeah! Yeah! Ungh!
Oh, Skippsie!
They were out of herring, so I got anchiov--
[gasp] What?!
Ugh, ugh! Oh, yeah!
What is the meaning of this?
Oh. Yeah...
uh, there have been upgradings
of the "b-double-fs" around here, so, uh...
shut up, okay?
Whoa, fellas! Ceasefir--
Skipper is my palsy-walsy!
Shut up! Okay?
Wait. Eh, maybe we can do
the saw-him-in-half thing
- and be sharing. - Ooh!
- Be taking that! - Hey!
B.F.F. handshake!
Huh? [yells]
[dizzied groan]
Kowalski, this is our chance!
Skipper, are you in there?
Private? Men?
What--was I...
Congaga-ing...
with Ringtail?
He's cured, baby!
Hans!
Ha! Oh.
Palsy-walsy?
Hans will return!
And I will vanquish and conquer!
And--can I keep our B.F.F. photo snaps?
Nope!
[yells]
That never gets old.
It's good to have you back, Skipper!
What is so good?
Now who will be my friend?
I will be--
Don't even right now, okay, Mort?
Buck up, Ringtail.
This could be a chance for us to start another chapter
in our sometimes-rocky relationship.
Maybe learn to see each other's point of view
and work together--
Why is he being stare-y at me?
The feet... are...
enemies! Yahhh!
Not the feet!
Now as I'm sure you know,
the annual zoo snooze begins in just one hour.
[cheers]
Um, hello?
I, of course, am completely understanding
what you are talking about, but mort has a newbie question.
Mort?
Um, yes, if a cow sneezes, does milk come out her nose?
No, Mort! That was not your stupid question!
Your stupid question was
"What exactly is this 'zoo snoozing'?"
No, I'm pretty sure my stupid question was about the cow.
- Shh! - This time each year,
children spend the entire night camped out with us!
Yeah. And it's great.
They sing songs, they play games--
It's an all-night buffet of contraband! Heh heh!
It was on a snooze that I tasted
my first Peanut Butter Winky!
Ooh, now I am loving
the sounds of this annual zoo snoozing!
[cheering]
All right, all right!
Now commence kid countdown!
Everybody get to your places and remember:
you can't lose when it's zoo snooze!
You like that? I made it up myself.
Just now. Totally off the cuff.
Let's have some mugs made. Maybe some keychains.
Welcome to the Annual Zoo Snooze.
Remember these are live animals, let's keep it that way.
Hello? [crickets]
Kids?
Talk to me, Kowalski.
Where are all the rambunctious ragamuffins?
I can't explain it, Skipper.
Sales were brisk-- a total sellout.
We should be up to our beaks in adorable moppets.
Sweet nimitz's dingy. It's--it's... them.
Let's get this zoo snooze started!
Zoo snooze, you lose!
- [evil laughter] - Whoa, whoa, whoa!
I'm not letting you trust-fund delinquents in here.
You have to. We paid.
That's... a lot of tickets.
That's all the tickets.
We wanted the whole zoo all to ourselves.
All night long.
Who says money can't buy happiness?
This is a nightmare! Those boys are monsters!
Absolute monsters!
The Vesuvii's crimes against zoomanity are well documented.
They shaved Marlene's tail,
greased the gorillas tire swing,
and painted pinky green.
My name made no sense at all.
Everyone, sacrifice yourselves to save me!
For King Juli--ow!
You blokes got it all wrong.
We're not trapped in here with those twins.
They're trapped in here with us!
At our mercy, if you get my drift.
Wet willies!
Swirlies!
Wedgies!
Atomic wedgies!
- [cheers] - [whimpers]
Whoa, whoa, whoa, ho, ho, ho, ho.
Now hold on, everybody.
Let's just think this through.
The Vesuvius twins are just little children!
Which means... we gotta wait till Alice falls asleep.
Then pow!
We swarm en masse no-holds-barred!
Revenge! Who's with me?
- [cheers] - [whimpers]
No feeding the animals. No touching the animals.
No licking the animals.
If you get eaten by an animal,
see the fine print on the back of your ticket.
Revenge. Now say it with me.
"Re-venge."
both: "Re-venge."
No taunting the animals. No mocking the animals.
Private?
You didn't join in with the mindless mob mentality.
No, Skipper, I didn't and that's because--
Aww, Private! You're gonna louse this whole thing up
with some drippy, sentimental claptrap, aren't you?
- No. - Good.
- Well, maybe slightly drippy. - Doh!
Yes, the Vesuviuses are rude, churlish, and nasty lads.
But they're still children!
Maybe, if someone is kind and nurturing to them now,
it will plant a seed of good in them.
And then, someday, that seed will sprout
and those boys will grow into mighty oaks of virtue!
And it can all begin here, Skipper,
with a simple act of kindness.
Yeah, right!
Whoa!
Nice try, Private,
but nobody's gonna buy that Lunacorny mush, right, Skipper?
[sniffles, whimpers]
[sleepily] No... making...
the things...
do... things... [snoring]
Men, new mission objectives:
we protect the Vesuvius's.
Kowalski, get your freeze ray.
Sweet!
I'm going to bag me some...
big game?
Um, shouldn't they be in their cages?
No prisoners!
[confused murmuring]
- Yo! I got one! - No, you don't.
Where'd the lil' guttersnipes go?
You!
You did this!
You had a roasting of the marshmallows!
Without me?
Outta the way. Hey!
You guys swiped the Vesuvius twins!
Thus denying us our rightful reprisals and whatnot.
Twins? Golly, that was tonight?
Don't play dumb. It was so you.
Yeah. Smoke bombs are your signature thing.
Smoke bombs?
Oh, I don't think so.
Rico, hork up a variety of standard explosives.
[coughing]
Well, let's see. We have time bombs, some--whew!
Stink bombs, and, ooh, Hollywood big-budget bombs.
Commodore danger in:
from Sweden, with furniture!
What were they thinking?
All right, they can't have gone far.
Spread out, find them.
All clear!
Get those frozen fops below.
[whimpering]
Classic square peg, round hole scenario.
I suggest we find another place to stow the twins.
Sorry about this, but trust me,
it's better than mob justice.
Come on! I'm getting edgy to give a wedgy!
So how long will your freeze ray last?
Skipper, when you're talking
bleeding-edge technology like this,
- it's impossible to even-- - [high-pitched scream]
Now. The freeze ray'll last till now.
Yo, I heard them coming from over this way!
Secure the screamers!
Rico... signature move!
[confused murmuring]
Aw, man, Leonard was right.
They do use smoke bombs!
No kidding!
Come on, they gotta be here somewhere!
All clear.
Okay, boys, we need to lay low until sunrise.
And the best way to lay low is up high.
- Did you find anything? - No.
And that really burns my trunk.
Well, they can't just disappear into thin air.
They bought it... in bulk.
Didn't even comparison shop.
- Suckers! - Now what, Skipper?
Now we just wait till the break of dawn.
Skipper, I've been crunching the numbers--
Oh, good, 'cause otherwise those numbers
might've stayed uncrunched.
Now we wouldn't want our numbers uncrunched, would we, boys?
It's a darn good thing you're here, Kowalski,
to keep those numbers good and crunched.
You, uh, through?
Mmm, yeah.
- Anyway, I've-- - Nope, I'm not!
It's the not the numbers I'm worried about getting crunched.
It's us!
- Ahhh! - Okay, now I'm through.
Anyway, I've cr--
ahem, I've done the math,
and between the four of us and the two twins,
this branch is at maximum capacity.
It's not holding!
Nobody's coming. We may be in the clear.
Hey, guys! I just heard four penguins
and two brats fall out of a tree!
Well, we're not clear. Bug out!
Well, not my top choice,
but sometimes you just have to hide out in a filthy, stinky,
disease-ridden cesspool.
Comes with the job.
- Filthy, stinky cesspool? - Yeah.
True words. But that tone of voice--
it sounds so judgmental.
Look, Vermin Monarch,
we don't need your hot head in the way right now.
Aw, gee, too bad.
Because look what you just found!
[battle cry]
Um, this is still better
than what the other animals would do to you.
Really.
- I found 'em! - Grab a kid and run!
Yo, birds,
just give us the Vesuvius's and nobody gets hurt.
Nobody but the naughty boys. Capiche?
Well, all I can say I guess, is...
Rico! Smoke bomb!
Wah--wait a minute. Hold on a minute.
It seems we've exhausted Rico's smoke bomb supply.
See? It's their thing.
Drat. Well, how about... twilight's last gleaming?
Yeah!
Bring 'em down at Ringtail's.
Roger that.
[both groaning]
Men, time to vamoose.
Still, you know, what we did was not as bad
as what the unleashed animal mob would've done.
Debatably.
[yawning] Morning already?
That wasn't so bad after all.
Still... beat it, you two!
What'd we ever do to deserve all that?
I have zero idea.
Hey, what's this?
Whoa. I guess sometimes we have been
sorta mean to the animals.
I never looked at it this way.
You know what?
- Maybe it's time to grow up. - Yeah.
Time to behave in a way
that would make mother and father proud.
I gotta hand it to you, Private.
Looks like the twins are indeed
growing into mighty oaks of virtue.
From now on, we'll only be mean to people.
People who have less money than we do.
Oh!
Or maybe just poison oaks.
Human problem. Not our jurisdiction.
[brassy detective music]
♪ ♪