1 00:00:03,331 --> 00:00:04,373 [bell tolls] 2 00:00:04,456 --> 00:00:07,331 [brassy detective music] 3 00:00:07,414 --> 00:00:14,331 ♪ ♪ 4 00:00:22,998 --> 00:00:24,873 - Hit it. - ♪ Hey-oh, yah, hah ♪ 5 00:00:24,956 --> 00:00:26,789 - ♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪ - Yeah. 6 00:00:26,873 --> 00:00:29,873 - ♪ Hey-oh ♪ - ♪ Yeah, oh-hey-oh ♪ 7 00:00:31,373 --> 00:00:34,123 [detective music] 8 00:00:36,748 --> 00:00:38,248 [camera shutter clicks] 9 00:00:38,331 --> 00:00:40,206 Cute and cuddly, boys. 10 00:00:53,914 --> 00:00:55,664 [toilet flushes] 11 00:00:55,748 --> 00:00:57,873 [water gurgling] 12 00:00:59,623 --> 00:01:01,164 [gulping] 13 00:01:01,248 --> 00:01:03,748 Um, Skipper? Salt, please. 14 00:01:03,831 --> 00:01:05,831 [toilet flushes] 15 00:01:05,914 --> 00:01:07,331 Here you go, Pri-- [toilet flushes] 16 00:01:07,414 --> 00:01:08,414 Vate. 17 00:01:08,498 --> 00:01:09,581 Thank you, Skipper. 18 00:01:09,664 --> 00:01:11,414 Uh, so, Kowalski, 19 00:01:11,498 --> 00:01:15,914 have you discovered any science... things? 20 00:01:15,998 --> 00:01:17,206 - Kowalski? - Hmm? 21 00:01:17,289 --> 00:01:19,248 Science? Any new discoveries? 22 00:01:19,331 --> 00:01:20,498 Oh, um... 23 00:01:20,581 --> 00:01:21,998 well, yes. 24 00:01:22,081 --> 00:01:24,456 I've been experimenting with transdimensional-- 25 00:01:24,539 --> 00:01:25,664 [toilet flushes] 26 00:01:25,748 --> 00:01:26,748 Transdim-- 27 00:01:26,831 --> 00:01:27,831 [toilet flushes] 28 00:01:27,914 --> 00:01:28,873 Tran-- [toilet flushes] 29 00:01:28,956 --> 00:01:30,498 Oh, come on! 30 00:01:30,581 --> 00:01:31,998 Enough already! 31 00:01:32,081 --> 00:01:33,498 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 32 00:01:33,581 --> 00:01:35,623 But you can't rush smoked salmon puffs. 33 00:01:35,706 --> 00:01:38,248 They burn if you so much as look at them the wrong way. 34 00:01:38,331 --> 00:01:39,956 The food isn't the problem, Roger. 35 00:01:40,039 --> 00:01:42,456 [toilet flushes] 36 00:01:42,539 --> 00:01:44,206 That is the problem. 37 00:01:44,289 --> 00:01:46,789 We're eating in a stinking sewer. 38 00:01:46,873 --> 00:01:48,664 I know. I know. 39 00:01:48,748 --> 00:01:49,789 [sighs] 40 00:01:49,873 --> 00:01:50,831 Flushing does not a great 41 00:01:50,914 --> 00:01:52,664 dinner party make, right? 42 00:01:52,748 --> 00:01:54,081 So I'll put on some show tunes. 43 00:01:54,164 --> 00:01:56,539 Yeah, yeah, something bold and brassy, 44 00:01:56,623 --> 00:01:59,289 a real 11 o'clock number. 45 00:01:59,373 --> 00:02:01,373 Reptile, the sounds of the sewer 46 00:02:01,456 --> 00:02:02,998 are the least of our problem. 47 00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:05,373 [sniffs] Oh! 48 00:02:05,456 --> 00:02:06,914 I'm sorry, guys. 49 00:02:06,998 --> 00:02:09,373 I've lived down here so long, I barely notice the smell. 50 00:02:09,456 --> 00:02:10,456 Really? 51 00:02:10,539 --> 00:02:11,706 How do you get used to-- 52 00:02:11,789 --> 00:02:14,706 You can't! You can't get used to that! 53 00:02:14,789 --> 00:02:16,456 What, are you insane? 54 00:02:16,539 --> 00:02:18,706 I hate my home. 55 00:02:18,789 --> 00:02:20,039 So why not leave? 56 00:02:20,123 --> 00:02:21,706 Many of your kind live quite comfortably 57 00:02:21,789 --> 00:02:24,748 in the South Florida area known as Gator Alley. 58 00:02:24,831 --> 00:02:27,164 Oh! I just got that. 59 00:02:27,248 --> 00:02:28,873 Alli-gator? Gator-- 60 00:02:28,956 --> 00:02:30,164 Yeah, we get it, Kowalski. 61 00:02:30,248 --> 00:02:33,581 Operation See Ya Later, Gator, is a go. 62 00:02:33,664 --> 00:02:36,539 We'll need a large crate, 10 million Deutschmarks, 63 00:02:36,623 --> 00:02:40,206 and a C-17 cargo jet on the runway in 15 minutes. 64 00:02:40,289 --> 00:02:42,039 I might need 30 minutes on the jet. 65 00:02:42,123 --> 00:02:43,498 Blast it, man! 66 00:02:43,581 --> 00:02:45,248 That could jeopardize the whole mission. 67 00:02:45,331 --> 00:02:47,914 Whoa! Guys, I'm not moving. 68 00:02:47,998 --> 00:02:51,081 Times Square, the Met, Broadway? 69 00:02:51,164 --> 00:02:53,206 I mean, come on. Broadway? 70 00:02:53,289 --> 00:02:54,956 You can't ask me to give up on my dream 71 00:02:55,039 --> 00:02:57,248 of singing at the Great White Way. 72 00:02:57,331 --> 00:02:58,748 No, I would rather live 73 00:02:58,831 --> 00:03:00,331 in the worst sewer in the Big Apple 74 00:03:00,414 --> 00:03:03,081 than in the best swamp in all of Florida. 75 00:03:03,164 --> 00:03:04,914 I hear you, brother. 76 00:03:04,998 --> 00:03:07,414 It's not the heat; it's the humidity. 77 00:03:07,498 --> 00:03:09,081 Uh, okay. 78 00:03:09,164 --> 00:03:10,331 So I'll just stay put... 79 00:03:10,414 --> 00:03:12,706 down here... in this sewer... 80 00:03:12,789 --> 00:03:16,706 on the banks of this raging river of filth. 81 00:03:16,789 --> 00:03:18,623 Oh, dear. 82 00:03:18,706 --> 00:03:20,623 You can always move to the zoo, Roger. 83 00:03:20,706 --> 00:03:21,789 I could? 84 00:03:21,873 --> 00:03:22,956 Negatory. 85 00:03:23,039 --> 00:03:24,664 Our zoo overlords may be somewhat 86 00:03:24,748 --> 00:03:25,914 slow on the uptake... 87 00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:27,039 But even they would notice 88 00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:28,164 the sudden appearance 89 00:03:28,248 --> 00:03:29,831 of an 800-pound alligator. 90 00:03:29,914 --> 00:03:31,123 Despair not, Roger. 91 00:03:31,206 --> 00:03:33,456 Compared to our usual high-stakes tango, 92 00:03:33,539 --> 00:03:37,039 your little problem is but a petty pirouette. 93 00:03:37,123 --> 00:03:38,873 Oh, okay. 94 00:03:38,956 --> 00:03:40,539 Which means what? 95 00:03:40,623 --> 00:03:41,789 I don't know. 96 00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:43,956 We'll find you a new home right here 97 00:03:44,039 --> 00:03:47,623 in the City That Never Sleeps. 98 00:03:47,706 --> 00:03:50,289 Fresh air, sunshine, and a pond 99 00:03:50,373 --> 00:03:52,581 to replicate your native marshy environments. 100 00:03:52,664 --> 00:03:53,623 Sold! Done! 101 00:03:53,706 --> 00:03:56,914 And we pirouette. 102 00:03:57,039 --> 00:03:58,164 What do you think, Roger? 103 00:03:58,248 --> 00:04:00,789 It's--it's nice. It's nice. 104 00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,414 I got one question. 105 00:04:02,498 --> 00:04:03,623 Why the log? 106 00:04:03,706 --> 00:04:06,831 It's not very-- uh, what's the word? 107 00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:08,664 Uh, comfortable. 108 00:04:08,748 --> 00:04:11,664 Well, with the park's predominantly human population, 109 00:04:11,748 --> 00:04:13,039 you'll need camouflage. 110 00:04:13,123 --> 00:04:15,164 Just hold still when people are around. 111 00:04:15,248 --> 00:04:16,789 Otherwise, they're likely to-- 112 00:04:16,873 --> 00:04:18,331 [screams] Alligator! 113 00:04:18,414 --> 00:04:20,498 Get the police! Help! 114 00:04:20,581 --> 00:04:24,039 No, no, I'm not gonna-- [stammering] 115 00:04:24,123 --> 00:04:25,414 Help! 116 00:04:25,498 --> 00:04:28,164 And finally, from the wackadoo file, 117 00:04:28,248 --> 00:04:31,039 Esther A. Paxton of Paramus claims 118 00:04:31,123 --> 00:04:34,331 to have seen an actual alligator in Central Park. 119 00:04:34,414 --> 00:04:36,831 But when Animal Control investigated, 120 00:04:36,914 --> 00:04:40,039 all they found was this log. 121 00:04:40,123 --> 00:04:41,206 [laughs] 122 00:04:41,289 --> 00:04:42,623 Sounds like they were barking 123 00:04:42,706 --> 00:04:44,539 up the wrong tree, Chuck. 124 00:04:44,623 --> 00:04:47,956 Ha! You're out on a limb there, Bonnie. 125 00:04:48,039 --> 00:04:49,456 Ha! 126 00:04:55,248 --> 00:04:57,206 Okay, I grant you, there were issues 127 00:04:57,289 --> 00:04:59,331 with our previous home proposal. 128 00:04:59,414 --> 00:05:00,831 But this one's brilliant. 129 00:05:00,914 --> 00:05:01,873 Are you really positive 130 00:05:01,956 --> 00:05:03,373 they're not gonna find me here? 131 00:05:03,456 --> 00:05:05,539 Not if you hold still this time. 132 00:05:05,623 --> 00:05:07,748 From 10:00 a.m. to 5:45 p.m. 133 00:05:07,831 --> 00:05:09,581 Monday through Friday, 8:00 p.m. on weekends. 134 00:05:09,664 --> 00:05:12,081 [door squeaks] [cash register dings] 135 00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:15,164 Uh-oh, Skipper. Museum's open. 136 00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:17,873 Duck and cover, men. 137 00:05:17,956 --> 00:05:20,498 And, Roger, hold still. 138 00:05:24,081 --> 00:05:26,789 Who wants to see some dead things? 139 00:05:26,873 --> 00:05:28,748 Gator. Cool. 140 00:05:28,831 --> 00:05:30,081 What, that? 141 00:05:30,164 --> 00:05:31,664 It's totally fake-looking. 142 00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:34,748 Check out his dumb rubber nose. 143 00:05:34,831 --> 00:05:35,748 Ow! 144 00:05:35,831 --> 00:05:37,206 Why would you do that? 145 00:05:37,289 --> 00:05:38,623 [both scream] 146 00:05:38,706 --> 00:05:41,623 Fear gripped the Museum of Natural History today 147 00:05:41,706 --> 00:05:44,248 as witnesses claim they were attacked 148 00:05:44,331 --> 00:05:46,248 by the alligator exhibit. 149 00:05:46,331 --> 00:05:47,998 We was just standing there, you know, 150 00:05:48,081 --> 00:05:49,289 not doing nothing wrong. 151 00:05:49,373 --> 00:05:51,248 And then the alligator comes alive 152 00:05:51,331 --> 00:05:54,123 and tried to eat my cousin, Vic. 153 00:05:55,539 --> 00:05:57,248 Curiously, museum officials say 154 00:05:57,331 --> 00:06:00,039 there is no alligator exhibit. 155 00:06:00,123 --> 00:06:02,956 Hmm, curious indeed, Chuck. 156 00:06:03,039 --> 00:06:04,331 [dramatic musical flourish] 157 00:06:04,414 --> 00:06:06,623 Okay, the pond and the museum scenarios 158 00:06:06,706 --> 00:06:09,664 suffered from unplanned variables. 159 00:06:09,748 --> 00:06:10,831 Lessons learned. 160 00:06:10,914 --> 00:06:12,373 But this one's a winner. 161 00:06:12,456 --> 00:06:14,289 All right, let me get-- I'm supposed to be what, now? 162 00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:15,623 A gargoyle, 163 00:06:15,706 --> 00:06:17,831 stone carved into a mythological creature 164 00:06:17,914 --> 00:06:19,873 that wards off evil spirits. 165 00:06:19,956 --> 00:06:21,664 The thing is, guys, um, 166 00:06:21,748 --> 00:06:23,664 I'm not really good with heights. 167 00:06:23,748 --> 00:06:24,873 Well, gee, Roger, 168 00:06:24,956 --> 00:06:26,706 what are you "real good" with? 169 00:06:26,789 --> 00:06:28,789 Not camouflage. Not holding still. 170 00:06:28,873 --> 00:06:30,748 We're running out of options here. 171 00:06:30,831 --> 00:06:33,414 Just don't look down. You'll be fine. 172 00:06:33,498 --> 00:06:36,623 Don't look down. Don't look down. 173 00:06:36,706 --> 00:06:37,998 Don't look... 174 00:06:38,081 --> 00:06:40,623 [wind whistling] 175 00:06:40,706 --> 00:06:41,789 Dooooooooown! 176 00:06:41,873 --> 00:06:43,498 Roger! 177 00:06:43,581 --> 00:06:44,831 [splash] 178 00:06:44,914 --> 00:06:46,164 Ooh, lucky for him 179 00:06:46,248 --> 00:06:47,456 there was a swimming pool down there. 180 00:06:47,539 --> 00:06:49,706 A rather public pool. 181 00:06:49,789 --> 00:06:53,373 [people screaming] [gator roars] 182 00:06:53,456 --> 00:06:55,081 This is Gator Watch, 183 00:06:55,164 --> 00:06:57,831 New York's number one in alligator attack updates. 184 00:06:57,914 --> 00:06:59,164 Breaking now: 185 00:06:59,248 --> 00:07:01,373 Manhattan's most wanted reptile 186 00:07:01,456 --> 00:07:04,373 has literally dropped into Midtown. 187 00:07:04,456 --> 00:07:06,706 Animal Control has placed the gator threat level 188 00:07:06,789 --> 00:07:08,581 at severe. 189 00:07:08,664 --> 00:07:10,539 Citizens are warned to not approach 190 00:07:10,623 --> 00:07:12,664 any prehistoric killing machines 191 00:07:12,748 --> 00:07:16,623 they may encounter between 82nd and Canal Street. 192 00:07:16,706 --> 00:07:18,873 Stay with us for Team Predator coverage 193 00:07:18,956 --> 00:07:22,248 and Gail Force with Gator Watch Weather. 194 00:07:28,039 --> 00:07:30,914 [helicopter rotors beating] 195 00:07:32,456 --> 00:07:33,623 I'm a fugitive. 196 00:07:33,706 --> 00:07:35,331 I'm a fugitive from justice. 197 00:07:35,414 --> 00:07:36,664 Don't panic. 198 00:07:36,748 --> 00:07:38,539 We just need to find a safe house, 199 00:07:38,623 --> 00:07:41,956 lay low until Danny Dogcatcher loses our scent. 200 00:07:43,956 --> 00:07:45,123 Ah, this should do it. 201 00:07:45,206 --> 00:07:47,373 Kowalski, can you crack the lock? 202 00:07:47,456 --> 00:07:49,873 A simple pin tumbler? 203 00:07:49,956 --> 00:07:52,081 Well, while you're lobbing softballs, 204 00:07:52,164 --> 00:07:55,539 why not ask if I can design a self-replicating nanobot? 205 00:07:55,623 --> 00:07:58,456 Which I can, obviously. 206 00:08:00,623 --> 00:08:02,539 Okay, slow and steady. 207 00:08:02,623 --> 00:08:04,039 [helicopter rotors beating] 208 00:08:04,123 --> 00:08:05,748 [screams] They're on to us! 209 00:08:05,831 --> 00:08:09,289 [thudding] 210 00:08:11,748 --> 00:08:14,414 Am I... 211 00:08:14,498 --> 00:08:16,581 on Broadway? 212 00:08:16,664 --> 00:08:20,373 I was born for this moment. 213 00:08:20,456 --> 00:08:23,289 ♪ When I was very young, I felt ♪ 214 00:08:23,373 --> 00:08:26,789 ♪ That I was sure to be more ♪ 215 00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:30,914 ♪ Than a handbag, pair of shoes, or belt ♪ 216 00:08:30,998 --> 00:08:33,414 A nice belt, but still. 217 00:08:33,498 --> 00:08:35,789 ♪ And now that it's years later ♪ 218 00:08:35,873 --> 00:08:36,873 ♪ People say ♪ 219 00:08:36,956 --> 00:08:39,456 It's an alligator! 220 00:08:39,539 --> 00:08:40,998 [people screaming] 221 00:08:41,081 --> 00:08:41,998 [screams] 222 00:08:44,164 --> 00:08:46,081 What? Too pitchy? 223 00:08:46,164 --> 00:08:47,581 Please, don't lock me up. 224 00:08:47,664 --> 00:08:49,664 I didn't have to time to rehearse. 225 00:08:50,914 --> 00:08:51,956 They've got Roger. 226 00:08:52,039 --> 00:08:53,956 Next stop, the Gray Bar Hotel. 227 00:08:54,039 --> 00:08:55,498 They're taking him to a hotel? 228 00:08:55,581 --> 00:08:57,289 Well, that will be a lovely home. 229 00:08:57,373 --> 00:08:59,539 Perhaps he'll find a mint on his pillow. 230 00:09:01,581 --> 00:09:03,706 We're canceling Roger's reservation. 231 00:09:06,081 --> 00:09:07,123 Rico, grappling gun. 232 00:09:07,206 --> 00:09:10,081 [brassy detective music] 233 00:09:10,164 --> 00:09:16,373 ♪ ♪ 234 00:09:16,456 --> 00:09:18,581 Follow my lead, boys. 235 00:09:21,039 --> 00:09:22,998 All right, we're back in this thing. 236 00:09:23,081 --> 00:09:24,623 All we need to do-- 237 00:09:26,373 --> 00:09:28,289 Gah! 238 00:09:28,373 --> 00:09:31,081 Men, commandeer this vehicle. 239 00:09:33,581 --> 00:09:34,664 Penguins? 240 00:09:34,748 --> 00:09:36,164 Kowalski, wheel man. 241 00:09:36,248 --> 00:09:39,039 Rico, gas. Private, music. 242 00:09:39,123 --> 00:09:41,831 Smooth jazz or hot adult contemporary? 243 00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:44,914 Let's classic rock this chase. 244 00:09:45,956 --> 00:09:47,581 And away we go. 245 00:09:47,664 --> 00:09:49,748 [classic rock music] 246 00:09:49,831 --> 00:09:50,789 [yells] 247 00:09:54,248 --> 00:09:55,998 No! Look out! Ahh! 248 00:09:56,081 --> 00:09:57,414 Not to worry, citizen. 249 00:09:57,498 --> 00:10:01,664 We'll return your vehicle in factory condition. 250 00:10:01,748 --> 00:10:04,164 - Oopsie. - Well, near factory condition. 251 00:10:04,248 --> 00:10:05,831 [tires squealing] 252 00:10:05,914 --> 00:10:07,873 Left. 253 00:10:07,956 --> 00:10:09,123 Right. 254 00:10:09,206 --> 00:10:10,498 Left. 255 00:10:10,581 --> 00:10:12,539 Lot of left. Whole lot of left. 256 00:10:12,623 --> 00:10:13,789 [horns honking] 257 00:10:13,873 --> 00:10:14,956 [crash] 258 00:10:17,498 --> 00:10:18,706 Rico, more gas. 259 00:10:18,789 --> 00:10:19,789 [burps] 260 00:10:19,873 --> 00:10:21,289 You know what I mean, soldier. 261 00:10:21,373 --> 00:10:22,539 Heh-heh! 262 00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:24,289 Skipper, can I do a pedal? 263 00:10:24,373 --> 00:10:25,498 Sorry, Private. 264 00:10:25,581 --> 00:10:27,373 We won't be needing brakes today. 265 00:10:27,456 --> 00:10:32,456 ♪ ♪ 266 00:10:32,539 --> 00:10:34,748 Well, this is our stop. 267 00:10:41,956 --> 00:10:43,248 [truck honks] 268 00:10:43,331 --> 00:10:46,414 [yells] 269 00:10:46,498 --> 00:10:47,873 Fast and furious, boys. 270 00:10:47,956 --> 00:10:49,498 Rico, blowtorch. 271 00:10:55,164 --> 00:10:56,498 Guys! 272 00:10:56,581 --> 00:10:59,206 You came to rescue me! 273 00:10:59,289 --> 00:11:00,331 Roger that, Roger. 274 00:11:00,414 --> 00:11:02,206 We're getting you a real home, 275 00:11:02,289 --> 00:11:06,581 not some dark, stinking hole of woe and despair. 276 00:11:06,664 --> 00:11:08,581 - [tires screeching] - Um, Skipper? 277 00:11:08,664 --> 00:11:10,498 I think we've arrived at the dark, 278 00:11:10,581 --> 00:11:13,289 stinking hole of woe and despair, and... 279 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:14,914 And it's our hole. 280 00:11:14,998 --> 00:11:17,081 We got the gator in the back. 281 00:11:17,164 --> 00:11:18,206 Bring him in. 282 00:11:18,289 --> 00:11:19,581 We've got a nice, cozy habitat 283 00:11:19,664 --> 00:11:20,956 all set up for him. 284 00:11:21,039 --> 00:11:23,623 Oh, well, that simplifies things. 285 00:11:23,706 --> 00:11:26,998 And so Gator Watch comes to an end 286 00:11:27,081 --> 00:11:29,789 as the happy reptile finds a new home 287 00:11:29,873 --> 00:11:32,081 at the Central Park Zoo. 288 00:11:32,164 --> 00:11:34,498 All's well that ends well, eh, Bonnie? 289 00:11:34,581 --> 00:11:36,039 Right you are, Chuck. 290 00:11:36,123 --> 00:11:38,831 Coming up, a Manhattan motorist swears 291 00:11:38,914 --> 00:11:42,414 his car was commandeered by-- and I'm not making this up-- 292 00:11:42,498 --> 00:11:44,081 penguins. 293 00:11:57,664 --> 00:11:59,706 [men talking over radio] 294 00:11:59,789 --> 00:12:02,956 [beeping] 295 00:12:03,831 --> 00:12:06,664 Hey! 296 00:12:06,747 --> 00:12:09,914 [laughing] 297 00:12:09,997 --> 00:12:11,497 Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi! 298 00:12:11,581 --> 00:12:13,122 Get out of me personals! 299 00:12:13,206 --> 00:12:15,497 [laughs] 300 00:12:15,581 --> 00:12:18,372 It makes butter in my tummy! 301 00:12:18,456 --> 00:12:20,331 Hey! Whoa! 302 00:12:21,456 --> 00:12:22,914 [beeping quickly] 303 00:12:26,039 --> 00:12:28,289 Guys, outside, there's all these men 304 00:12:28,372 --> 00:12:29,997 in the matching suits, 305 00:12:30,081 --> 00:12:31,497 and they have wands that are all like, 306 00:12:31,581 --> 00:12:33,456 "Bleep, bloop, bloop, bloop, beep, bleep!" 307 00:12:33,539 --> 00:12:36,164 and-- 308 00:12:36,247 --> 00:12:38,414 okay, how am I the paranoid one here? 309 00:12:38,497 --> 00:12:39,622 Relax, Marlene. 310 00:12:39,706 --> 00:12:40,914 Have some morning nosh. 311 00:12:40,997 --> 00:12:43,622 What? Hey, I don't-- 312 00:12:43,706 --> 00:12:44,914 What you are seeing 313 00:12:44,997 --> 00:12:48,622 is the vanguard of democracy in action. 314 00:12:48,706 --> 00:12:53,956 No, I am seeing men in suits with wands and blooping. 315 00:12:54,039 --> 00:12:55,914 Today is the grand opening 316 00:12:55,997 --> 00:12:57,956 of our newest up-charge attraction, 317 00:12:58,039 --> 00:12:59,997 the Central Park Children's Zoo. 318 00:13:00,081 --> 00:13:03,747 With the ribbon-cutting ceremony by Purvis McSlade, 319 00:13:03,831 --> 00:13:05,247 New York's parks commissioner, 320 00:13:05,331 --> 00:13:09,206 the hero that gave us zoo regulation 742-F. 321 00:13:10,539 --> 00:13:13,789 Mm, the "fresh fish for penguins" initiative. 322 00:13:13,872 --> 00:13:15,289 Bless that man. 323 00:13:15,372 --> 00:13:17,414 Uh-huh! 324 00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:20,164 [gargling] 325 00:13:20,247 --> 00:13:21,789 Now, if you're seeing men in suits, 326 00:13:21,872 --> 00:13:23,039 that must mean the commissioner's team 327 00:13:23,122 --> 00:13:24,997 is making its final security sweep. 328 00:13:25,081 --> 00:13:26,331 How exciting! 329 00:13:26,414 --> 00:13:27,414 Can we go watch? 330 00:13:27,497 --> 00:13:28,706 Negative, Private. 331 00:13:28,789 --> 00:13:31,164 Commissionorial security is a high-stakes game. 332 00:13:31,247 --> 00:13:32,997 They don't need four extra players. 333 00:13:33,081 --> 00:13:34,622 Yeah, well, never mind; they're leaving anyway. 334 00:13:34,706 --> 00:13:35,664 What? 335 00:13:35,747 --> 00:13:36,914 - Hey! - Leaving? 336 00:13:36,997 --> 00:13:39,456 They couldn't be done already. 337 00:13:39,539 --> 00:13:43,122 What kind of slapdash security sweep is this? 338 00:13:46,122 --> 00:13:48,206 I don't know. Looks pretty safe to me. 339 00:13:48,289 --> 00:13:50,664 [birds chirping] 340 00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,247 "Looks," Marlene? "Looks"? 341 00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:54,206 It's not the threats you see with your eyes; 342 00:13:54,289 --> 00:13:56,331 it's the ones you feel deep in your gut. 343 00:13:56,414 --> 00:13:58,872 Uh-huh! 344 00:13:58,956 --> 00:14:01,706 Where's the reflecting mirror for satellite-based lasers? 345 00:14:01,789 --> 00:14:04,539 The titanium ground net for tunneling mole robots? 346 00:14:04,622 --> 00:14:05,872 The comprehensive antidote kit 347 00:14:05,956 --> 00:14:07,372 to counteract any mind-control gas 348 00:14:07,456 --> 00:14:09,622 sprayed by a villainous madman with a superblimp? 349 00:14:09,706 --> 00:14:12,497 A superblimp? Really? 350 00:14:12,581 --> 00:14:13,872 Go ahead and scoff. 351 00:14:13,956 --> 00:14:16,622 Superblimp madmen live to smack down scoffers. 352 00:14:16,706 --> 00:14:19,164 This is Commissioner McSlade we're talking about. 353 00:14:19,247 --> 00:14:21,456 If those kindergarten crackerjacks can't protect him, 354 00:14:21,539 --> 00:14:24,289 then we will. 355 00:14:24,372 --> 00:14:25,456 Check one. 356 00:14:25,539 --> 00:14:26,456 Check two. 357 00:14:26,539 --> 00:14:27,581 Ow. 358 00:14:27,664 --> 00:14:30,539 What is a Children's Zoo? 359 00:14:30,622 --> 00:14:32,164 A zoo for children? 360 00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:33,081 Yes. 361 00:14:33,164 --> 00:14:35,039 But more than that... 362 00:14:35,122 --> 00:14:37,706 I want a total threat neutralization in five. 363 00:14:37,789 --> 00:14:41,497 If you notice anything funny, take it very seriously. 364 00:14:48,122 --> 00:14:49,997 Trip hazard, delta sector. 365 00:14:50,081 --> 00:14:51,831 I'm going in. 366 00:14:51,914 --> 00:14:53,789 Ha! Wha! 367 00:14:53,872 --> 00:14:55,872 Ba-ba-ba-ba-daba! 368 00:14:57,039 --> 00:14:59,414 [threateningly] Mm! 369 00:14:59,497 --> 00:15:02,956 Sheep and donkeys, goats and... 370 00:15:03,039 --> 00:15:05,831 odd little horses side by side. 371 00:15:05,956 --> 00:15:07,997 There's a lesson in that for all of us. 372 00:15:08,081 --> 00:15:09,581 Nut-shaped grenade? 373 00:15:09,664 --> 00:15:12,331 What, no outside food? 374 00:15:12,414 --> 00:15:15,122 Uh, apparently, it's just a nut-shaped nut. 375 00:15:15,206 --> 00:15:16,289 I've got something. 376 00:15:16,372 --> 00:15:18,372 What is it? Missile? Chopper? 377 00:15:18,456 --> 00:15:20,789 Superblimp? Come on, superblimp! 378 00:15:20,872 --> 00:15:22,622 Let me at 'em! Come on! 379 00:15:22,706 --> 00:15:24,081 Oh, never mind. 380 00:15:24,164 --> 00:15:25,372 It's only a pigeon. 381 00:15:25,456 --> 00:15:26,456 both: Oh. 382 00:15:26,539 --> 00:15:27,664 Give me those. 383 00:15:30,706 --> 00:15:32,539 That smile. 384 00:15:34,039 --> 00:15:35,414 Sweet sky gravy! 385 00:15:35,497 --> 00:15:37,122 That bird's going gonna drop one 386 00:15:37,206 --> 00:15:38,664 on the commissioner's suit! 387 00:15:38,747 --> 00:15:39,997 - Huh? - Drop what? 388 00:15:40,081 --> 00:15:41,581 Yo, Alice. 389 00:15:41,664 --> 00:15:44,081 Pigeons really did a number on these statues. 390 00:15:44,164 --> 00:15:46,747 It's like the stinkaroni salad up here. 391 00:15:46,831 --> 00:15:49,456 Pee-yoo! 392 00:15:49,539 --> 00:15:52,331 But, Skipper, why would the commissioner be targeted by-- 393 00:15:52,414 --> 00:15:53,664 Pigeons! 394 00:15:53,747 --> 00:15:56,789 Now, there's an animal I have no use for. 395 00:15:56,872 --> 00:15:58,997 Filthy disease-mongers. 396 00:15:59,081 --> 00:16:02,039 But thanks to parks regulation 758-P, 397 00:16:02,122 --> 00:16:04,539 my anti-pigeon initiative, 398 00:16:04,622 --> 00:16:07,456 we are actively chasing the little beggars 399 00:16:07,539 --> 00:16:09,789 out of our parks and public spaces. 400 00:16:09,872 --> 00:16:11,456 Hey, Mr. Commissioner! 401 00:16:11,539 --> 00:16:13,914 I'ma show you some of my initiative. 402 00:16:13,997 --> 00:16:15,247 [laughs] 403 00:16:17,914 --> 00:16:19,331 [jet engine divebombing] 404 00:16:19,414 --> 00:16:20,497 Rico! 405 00:16:25,039 --> 00:16:26,164 Whoaaaa! 406 00:16:26,247 --> 00:16:28,456 Ooh! Say what? 407 00:16:28,539 --> 00:16:29,747 [both scream] 408 00:16:29,831 --> 00:16:33,039 [groans] What? 409 00:16:33,122 --> 00:16:34,372 Skipper! 410 00:16:34,456 --> 00:16:35,539 How did you know that bird 411 00:16:35,622 --> 00:16:37,206 had a beef with the commissioner? 412 00:16:37,289 --> 00:16:38,706 I've seen that look before, right before 413 00:16:38,789 --> 00:16:41,497 our last commissioner took a plop to the left lapel. 414 00:16:41,581 --> 00:16:42,789 [all gasp] 415 00:16:42,872 --> 00:16:44,914 Got him right where a pretty flower would go. 416 00:16:44,997 --> 00:16:47,206 [laughs] 417 00:16:48,164 --> 00:16:49,997 It's just a suit, isn't it? 418 00:16:50,081 --> 00:16:52,039 There were blueberries, Private. 419 00:16:52,122 --> 00:16:55,706 Blue... berries. 420 00:16:55,789 --> 00:16:57,581 It was a beautiful day-- 421 00:16:57,664 --> 00:16:59,414 sunny, clear. 422 00:16:59,497 --> 00:17:01,872 Pigeon came in low and slow from due east. 423 00:17:01,956 --> 00:17:03,081 [bombs whistling] 424 00:17:03,164 --> 00:17:04,206 I don't know why I didn't jump in 425 00:17:04,289 --> 00:17:05,706 and take it for him. 426 00:17:05,789 --> 00:17:07,372 That day, I swore I'd never see 427 00:17:07,456 --> 00:17:10,372 another public official blueberried, 428 00:17:10,456 --> 00:17:12,622 not on my watch. 429 00:17:12,706 --> 00:17:14,414 Gee, that's too bad. 430 00:17:14,497 --> 00:17:17,206 'Cause before that ribbon's cut, this commissioner's gonna 431 00:17:17,289 --> 00:17:19,539 be wearing some doody on the suity. 432 00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:20,914 [laughs] 433 00:17:20,997 --> 00:17:22,206 Grab him! 434 00:17:25,539 --> 00:17:27,414 Skipper, what do we do now? 435 00:17:27,497 --> 00:17:29,081 You heard the pigeon, Private. 436 00:17:29,164 --> 00:17:31,081 He's sworn to do his dirty deed 437 00:17:31,164 --> 00:17:33,289 before the commissioner cuts that ribbon. 438 00:17:33,372 --> 00:17:37,331 The clock... is...ticking. 439 00:17:37,414 --> 00:17:42,622 So were the dramatic pauses really necessary, then? 440 00:17:42,706 --> 00:17:43,997 Yes. 441 00:17:44,081 --> 00:17:46,081 [laughs] 442 00:17:48,289 --> 00:17:51,581 Blast! He's flying circles around us. 443 00:17:51,664 --> 00:17:53,372 Kowalski, options. 444 00:17:53,456 --> 00:17:55,039 Well, I could pull... 445 00:17:55,122 --> 00:17:56,539 this branch. 446 00:17:56,622 --> 00:17:58,581 [snap] 447 00:17:58,664 --> 00:18:00,622 Stick. Your option is a stick. 448 00:18:00,706 --> 00:18:03,622 I pulled the wrong one, all right? 449 00:18:03,706 --> 00:18:05,414 I have upgraded the standard jet pack 450 00:18:05,497 --> 00:18:08,456 with a full weapons array and auxiliary turbos. 451 00:18:08,539 --> 00:18:11,122 It's all untested, but I'm 51.7% certain 452 00:18:11,206 --> 00:18:13,039 it won't erupt in a gaseous fireball 453 00:18:13,122 --> 00:18:14,414 the size of a dwarf sun. 454 00:18:14,497 --> 00:18:16,539 That's slightly over half. 455 00:18:16,622 --> 00:18:19,581 Why, those are odds we can most likely live with. 456 00:18:19,664 --> 00:18:20,831 Prelaunch waggle. 457 00:18:20,914 --> 00:18:23,997 [soda sloshing] 458 00:18:24,081 --> 00:18:25,289 Hey, penguins! 459 00:18:25,372 --> 00:18:27,039 I guess I got the drop on you. 460 00:18:27,122 --> 00:18:29,081 [laughs] 461 00:18:29,872 --> 00:18:32,956 There are many words that rhyme with "zoo." 462 00:18:33,039 --> 00:18:34,539 "New." 463 00:18:41,664 --> 00:18:44,414 Ah! Ooh! Ow! 464 00:18:46,122 --> 00:18:47,539 I'm trying to fly here! 465 00:19:03,247 --> 00:19:04,456 Ah! 466 00:19:06,164 --> 00:19:08,622 He's trying to lose me in the sycamore. 467 00:19:08,706 --> 00:19:09,747 Converge! 468 00:19:12,289 --> 00:19:13,372 Don't worry, Skipper. 469 00:19:13,456 --> 00:19:15,331 He can't get away from all of us. 470 00:19:16,956 --> 00:19:19,164 [gasps] 471 00:19:19,247 --> 00:19:22,956 [all cooing] 472 00:19:23,039 --> 00:19:25,289 Now, boys, check every face. 473 00:19:28,289 --> 00:19:30,372 They're identical, Skipper. 474 00:19:30,456 --> 00:19:31,789 What are we looking for? 475 00:19:31,872 --> 00:19:35,372 The look of pure, suit-staining evil. 476 00:19:35,456 --> 00:19:37,164 I got news for you, pal. 477 00:19:37,247 --> 00:19:39,122 We all want to see the commissioner get 478 00:19:39,206 --> 00:19:40,539 what's coming to him. 479 00:19:40,622 --> 00:19:42,331 [pigeons cooing] 480 00:19:42,414 --> 00:19:44,747 And so, without further ado-- 481 00:19:44,831 --> 00:19:48,122 [laughs] That also rhymes with "zoo." 482 00:19:55,206 --> 00:19:57,789 Better push back my 3:00 p.m. merry-go-round dedication. 483 00:19:59,372 --> 00:20:02,206 Hansel and Gretel special, on my mark. 484 00:20:02,289 --> 00:20:03,914 Execute. 485 00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:09,956 [all cooing] 486 00:20:19,997 --> 00:20:22,497 Skipper, look! 487 00:20:22,581 --> 00:20:24,914 Blueberries. It's him. 488 00:20:27,997 --> 00:20:29,122 Empty. 489 00:20:29,206 --> 00:20:31,247 Kowalski, fire the turbos. 490 00:20:31,331 --> 00:20:32,956 The turbos? 491 00:20:33,039 --> 00:20:34,414 But they're highly unstable. 492 00:20:34,497 --> 00:20:36,622 It's too dangerous. 493 00:20:36,706 --> 00:20:38,997 That was an order, soldier. 494 00:20:39,081 --> 00:20:41,331 Now, pop this soda. 495 00:20:47,372 --> 00:20:51,331 Here comes the payback from my way back. 496 00:20:52,706 --> 00:20:55,081 [low tone] [laughs] 497 00:20:55,164 --> 00:20:56,831 Skipper, the package has dropped. 498 00:20:59,289 --> 00:21:03,664 For... the commissioner's... suit! 499 00:21:10,122 --> 00:21:11,581 Noooooo! 500 00:21:11,664 --> 00:21:13,914 all: Ugh! 501 00:21:15,164 --> 00:21:17,497 [cheers and applause] 502 00:21:17,581 --> 00:21:19,622 Fireworks! I like it. 503 00:21:19,706 --> 00:21:21,872 Good for the old parks commission spirit. 504 00:21:21,956 --> 00:21:23,372 Rah, rah! 505 00:21:23,456 --> 00:21:24,914 Whatever, weirdo. 506 00:21:24,997 --> 00:21:28,372 Sir, your merry-go-round dedication. 507 00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:30,872 No, wait! I can make another one. 508 00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:32,789 Just--just give me a sec, all right? 509 00:21:34,122 --> 00:21:35,289 Oh, come on! 510 00:21:35,372 --> 00:21:38,289 [steam hissing] 511 00:21:38,372 --> 00:21:39,747 Skipper? 512 00:21:39,831 --> 00:21:40,831 Talk to me. 513 00:21:40,914 --> 00:21:41,831 [groans] 514 00:21:41,914 --> 00:21:46,664 - Oh! - I've seen... worse. 515 00:21:46,747 --> 00:21:48,164 That's true. 516 00:21:48,247 --> 00:21:51,164 I'm sure a good scrubbing with soap and... 517 00:21:51,247 --> 00:21:53,664 sandpaper-- 518 00:21:53,747 --> 00:21:56,331 - What? - Skipper, what--how did-- 519 00:21:56,414 --> 00:21:59,831 Standard-issue pigeon-proof vest. 520 00:21:59,914 --> 00:22:01,997 Like I said, never again. 521 00:22:02,081 --> 00:22:04,622 [all cheering] 522 00:22:06,164 --> 00:22:09,122 And so let us bid farewell 523 00:22:09,206 --> 00:22:12,331 to the bravest article of clothing I've ever known. 524 00:22:12,414 --> 00:22:14,747 [crying] 525 00:22:14,831 --> 00:22:16,789 Well done, suit. 526 00:22:20,081 --> 00:22:22,914 What--you hear that? 527 00:22:22,997 --> 00:22:25,122 No. No. Noooo! 528 00:22:25,206 --> 00:22:27,706 [splat] Oh, man! 529 00:22:27,789 --> 00:22:30,289 Any of you guys know how to get blueberries out of feathers? 530 00:22:30,372 --> 00:22:33,039 Now, that's what I call poo-etic justice. 531 00:22:33,122 --> 00:22:35,539 [laughs] 532 00:22:35,622 --> 00:22:37,206 See what I did? I played with a word. 533 00:22:37,289 --> 00:22:40,247 Yes, we're all enjoying your toilet humor, Private. 534 00:22:40,331 --> 00:22:41,872 Real classy. 535 00:22:41,956 --> 00:22:44,206 Oh, right. 536 00:22:44,289 --> 00:22:46,372 Poo. Tee-hee!