[bell tolls]
[brassy detective music]
- Hit it. - ♪ Hey-oh, yah, hah ♪
- ♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪ - Yeah.
- ♪ Hey-oh ♪ - ♪ Yeah, oh-hey-oh ♪
[brassy detective music]
[camera shutter clicks]
Cute and cuddly, boys.
[triumphant music]
Whee!
I'm jumpy. Maurice, come be jumpy.
Love to, Mort, but I've got a bajillion royal duties.
[laughs] You said "doodies."
No, things I gotta do for the king.
Duty.
[laughs] It's still funny.
Now be jumpy!
All right.
Maybe just one bounce.
Whee!
[sighs]
I knew that was a bad idea.
Whee!
Oh, no, he's not gonna--
No way. The throne!
[thunk]
Oopsie.
[relieved sigh]
I'll get the glue.
- To eat? - No!
All right, give the glue a few hours to set,
and we're golden.
Just make sure
King Julien stays away from his throne, okay?
Okay!
Honeys, I'm home!
- Who missed me? - I did.
Eh, someone else this time.
How was your royal walkabout, Your Highness?
Maurice, this zoo is full of so many fantastical things.
Did you know, for example,
free gum under all the benches?
Watch; I'm going to blow a bubble.
You can keep that.
Now what to do with the rest of my day.
You could sit on your throne.
- [clears throat] - I take that back.
Or you could go swimming
or bouncing or dancing.
Work it! Work it!
Work it like you mean it!
Hmm, I do mean it.
But right now, mostly because Mort stuck the idea in my brain,
I'd like to sit on my throne.
No, your majesty! Don't!
Don't what, Maurice?
Don't let me keep you from sitting on your throne,
which is rock solid and not breaking or anything.
[throne creaking]
Why is my booty unable to find my throne's sweet spot?
- [screams] - My throne!
It's all brokeny and cracked and brokeny!
Who broke the royal throne?
Uh, uh...
it was an old throne, creaky.
Maybe it just broke on its own.
Who can say?
I can. We did it. Oops.
So it was you two.
Yes, but it was an accident.
An accident you did on purpose!
This, I cannot be believing!
I ask so very little from you.
But here you two willy-nillies go and ruin
the most precious symbol of my power!
Isn't that your crown?
A king can have many power symbols.
I see now what must be done.
Okay, this half of the kingdom is for me and my king things.
And that half is for you.
This is a lot less than half.
- I like it. - Well, of course
it is smaller, Maurice;
there is only one of me and two of you.
That means we should have more and you should have less.
The king never has less. That's the law.
So I take it we're not allowed in your half?
Got that right, mister.
And you won't come into our half?
Why would I want to? It's so tiny.
You know what? Sounds jim-dandy.
Mort and I are going to have a good time here.
But I--
Yeah, we're going to hang here, kick back,
maybe have a party. You want to have a party, Mort?
- Can we invite King Julien? - No!
Oh, okay.
Um, frankly,
you two were giving my style the cramps.
I can have fun all by myself.
[sighs sadly]
You're it. No, you're it.
You're it, no touchbacks.
No, I'm not, because I'm on base.
There is no base. There is for the king.
The king is never it.
Oh, okay, I can't argue with that logic.
[melancholy piano music]
Well, this stinks.
Hello, friendly penguins.
Eh, I was wondering
if you could make this melon split open for me.
- Rico, slice. - Ah!
There you go, ringtail.
Service with a psycho smile.
[laughs maniacally]
Yes, okay, thank you.
Oh, one more thing.
Could you also let me boss you around,
- you know, just a little? - No. Next question.
Please? I--I have nobody to browbeat.
Mort and Maurice have left me.
- They left you? - Yes, right after
I kicked them out.
And now I am so lonely.
You know, my Uncle Nigel always said,
"On the voyage of life, the best boat is a friend-ship."
Ooh, are we going boating?
Who needs Maurice and Mort
when my new bestest friends have a yacht?
I think what Private's saying
is that Maurice and Mort are your "bestest" friends,
not us.
Maurice and Mort do not have a boat.
Who needs them?
- You need them. - Who?
- Maurice and Mort. - No.
They are a little too boatless for my tastes.
Forget about the boat! You need to patch things up
- with your pals. - Ha!
Nothing could possibly ever make me want
to be anywhere near them.
[distant upbeat music]
Oh, oh!
My booty senses nearby movin' and groovin'.
[upbeat music]
Burt. Yeah, you're on the list.
- In you go, my friend. - Awesome!
Make way for the party pachyderm.
[crash]
Um, where's the peanuts?
Down the hall on the left.
Thank you.
How'd they get a whole elephant in that shed?
- It's roomier than it looks. - A party!
Make way for the party king, man.
Hold on there, chief. We gotta see if your name's
- on the guest list. - Party king?
Nah, not on the list.
Hold on. I got a King Julien.
- Yeah, that's me. - Yeah, you're on
the "absolutely not a guest" list.
Wha--this must be some kind of missed stake.
Oh, it's no mistake.
We'd love for you to come, wouldn't we, Mort?
Love!
But you said that we're supposed to stay on our half
and you on yours.
My hands are tied.
You understand.
Ah!
[splash]
Don't give me those sad eyes.
He started it.
They...
do not want me at their party.
This is an outrageousness!
I shall throw my own party,
and my many friends will be coming.
Right, my many friends?
Uh, all right.
Okay, everybody, let's start the party games.
I'll make balloon animals.
This one's an earthworm.
Tapeworm.
Oh, and look, a hookworm.
Eh, make that a flatworm.
Wow, look at the time.
Early wake-up tomorrow.
We've got to, you know, do something,
penguin stuff.
You do not have to lie.
No one loves me.
Now, that's not--
As much as I love me.
Okay, yeah, that's true.
Look at me.
I cannot even throw a proper shindig.
Yeah, okay.
Well, thanks for having us.
[sighs]
It was a real treat.
[sighs more loudly]
Bye, now.
[sighs dramatically]
Aw, ringtail,
you're playing my heartstrings like a big bow fiddle.
Maybe you can't throw a party,
or maybe you just need a little help.
Men, commence operation hootenanny.
[military drum cadence]
Turntables are up to maximum speed.
This party is a go-o-o.
The only thing left is the guest list.
Leave that to me.
I am connected.
But everyone's still at Mort and Maurice's.
Uh-uh-uh!
I have many friends.
They will not be letting me down.
Everybody, party!
[laughs]
Who will start the congaga line?
Me? Okey-dokey.
When you said you had friends...
We thought you meant real friends.
But they are real friends.
Janice here wants to be a dental technician,
but Emil thinks she isn't suited for it.
How can you crush Janice's dreams, Emil?
Yes, I'm sorry, Emil.
You're right; we should get along.
That's what friends do, get along, not fight.
[laughs sadly]
Oy.
Slurp!
You need to see this.
Bring sad eyes.
Ah, please enjoy the hors d'oeuvres.
None of this "No, thanks, I'm stuffed" nonsense.
Rosalita, you made it!
Ooh! Oh, ho, ho!
Rosalita, you naughty girl.
You simply must, must dance with me.
The King, he's--he's--
Stark, raving mad.
And crazy too.
Without friends, his delicate psyche snapped
like Snappy S. Snapperson,
the snappingest kid in Snapadelphia,
son of Snap Snapperson,
snap photography specialist, and--
- Rico. - Oh!
Thanks.
I just wanted to teach him a lesson.
I didn't want this.
He needs you, Maurice, more than you ever knew.
Come on, Mort. We're going home.
Yay!
[singing]
Mort. Maurice.
You came to my party?
We thought it might be fun.
Splendulous!
But are you on the guest list?
Oh, okay. I get it.
You want me to beg.
- Well, forget-- - Wait!
Don't go.
You are on the list.
Look. See?
There you are, and that is me.
And nobody cares that you broke my throne,
because we're all friends again.
Yeah, okay.
I guess we are.
Huzzah!
Welcome to my party, Maurice.
I want you to be considering my side of the stripe
your side of the stripe.
Yay!
Now please come meet Janice.
She wants to be a dental technician.
And this is Emil.
He wants to crush Janice's dreams.
It's good those freaks have each other.
I am now approaching the reptile house.
Roger that, Alice.
Just be careful.
I am being careful!
I am being extra, super-- whoa!--careful.
Very careful.
Hey, what's going on?
Intel is sketchy.
All we know is,
we've got a transfer from the Hoboken zoo.
I am now entering the reptile house.
I am now releasing the subject.
I am now...
getting my sweet patootie out of here!
This warrants further investigation.
What's in there?
Ribbit!
Oh, my gosh,
he's just a bundle of precious.
Oh, he is the cutest thing my eyes have ever seen.
Cuter than me?
[snapping]
Aah!
Hello, little friend.
Welcome to the zoo.
I'm-- oh, dear.
I don't think he can hear me.
Oh, and I think he's scared.
Lock-pop ladder, go.
Now, my little friend, as I was saying, I'm...
Annoying?
Get my lunch.
Flies, lightly sauteed.
Thank you.
[laughs]
[all laughing]
Cute froggy. He's funny.
Yeah, a real cut-up.
[sighs]
It's Hoboken all over again.
Listen, my name is Barry,
and you all work for me now, everyone.
You do what I say when I say it.
Aw, have you ever heard a more adorable tirade?
I just want to scoop him up and give him a great big hug.
Trust me, lady, I'm not the hugging type.
I'm the "Do what I say or I'll ruin your life" type.
Oh, really, little hoppy?
And how are you going to do that?
Blah blah!
Oh, like this.
[laughing]
Oh, that never gets old.
That never gets old!
What's wrong with Rico?
Toxins.
According to scratch-and-sniff rain forest animals,
Barry is a poison dart frog.
His skin is drenched in paralyzing poisons.
So nobody can touch Barry? Ever?
I guess he really isn't the hugging type.
- How sad. - Yeah, boo hoo.
How long till Rico is back to normal?
Rico normal or normal normal?
Rico normal.
It could be days.
Then I just have one question.
Why does the Peruvian booby smell like armpit?
Uh, no.
How do we fight an enemy we can't touch?
Skipper, maybe we don't need to fight him at all.
[ribbiting]
Hey, monkeys!
[clears throat]
Monkeys have tails.
We are...
Giving me lip when you should be giving me bananas.
Are we going to have a problem here?
Do I need to break out the toxic touch?
No, take them.
Take them all.
I do not like this telling other animals what to do.
That is my niche.
Yo, elephant!
Gah!
Not a good idea.
Now, get over there and suck up those bananas.
Now!
[laughs]
Now blow.
[laughs]
Okay, but I do like that.
Look at it.
I mean, you got to respect that creativity.
Hey, what's the matter with you two?
This is hilarious.
[laughing continues]
I demand you laugh with me!
Ha, ha-ha, hew.
We are not amused, tiny amphibian.
Sorry, Barry.
I know your bullying is just a desperate cry for attention.
Don't mollycoddle the prisoner, Private.
He's getting what he deserves.
If there's one thing I cannot stand, it's a bully.
When one animal makes it his business
to infringe on the freedom of others,
I make it my business
to take that punk down a notch or eight.
Right, Kowalski?
Right, and-- uh-oh.
[gasps]
Oh, come on.
Step up your game, birds.
I'm already up two-zip.
Our situation is rapidly deteriorating.
What do we do, Skipper?
Well, Kowalski's been working on a secret project.
It's untested, perhaps even dangerous.
Squeak! Squeak!
[electronic beeping]
[whirring]
Private, prepare yourself for what you are about to see.
Is--is that--
Yes, Private, it is.
A six-foot whacking stick.
Barry will never know what hit him.
Skipper, isn't there a less violent solution?
Yeah, sure, probably.
But I want to see what this baby can do.
[delicate harpsichord music]
[slurping]
Oh, countess, your tea is delicious.
Thank you, Lady Dashwood.
Would you care for another crumpet or whatnot?
[laughing] "Crumpet."
Ooh, ooh, I know. I know.
Dance a waltz.
Eh, excuse me, cute froggy.
You seem to be confuse-ed.
I am the one who is to be telling the animals what to do.
Oh?
Yes.
This is because I am king.
The bossingness is what I do.
However, if you are interested, you may apply for an internship.
[clears throat]
We're currently accepting applications
for the spring semester.
But until you have properly internalized,
you must cease the bossing around.
Hmm. You know what?
Cease this!
Nooooooooooo!
This madness ends now, punk.
Ooh, are you now going to pummel him
until he is all squishy?
That's the idea.
Yes!
I am King Julien, and I approve this plan.
[sighs]
[squeaks]
Wha!
Ha!
Ho!
Wah!
Where'd he go?
I don't know, Skipper.
- Boo. - [screams]
Get off get off get off.
Evac!
Come on. Let's play.
[laughing]
All clear.
Boo again.
[screams]
Nooooooo!
Yes!
Three-zip.
And you're next.
[gasps]
How do you touch someone who's untouchable?
It is a riddle,
like what do you eat first, the chicken or the egg?
I say the egg, 'cause they are breakfast foods.
That's not the way it goes.
So you think the chicken first, huh?
Oh, it does make a nice base for the eggs.
No, that's not--
Mort, will you keep it down?
We're trying to think here.
I like beans.
Mort, who can be dealing with you?
Stay in that can.
That's it!
[dramatic music]
[whirring]
[harpsichord music]
Oi!
Ow!
Oi!
Ow!
[trumpeting a tune]
Oh, who can save us?
Penguin, it's time you and me got in touch.
Take this!
Or this!
Hey, I can't--
You can't touch me.
But I can touch you.
Ah! Stay away from me!
Barry, I'm going to do to you what no one else ever has.
No! Nooo!
Give you a big hug.
Huh? What?
I'd be a grumpy Gus too if no one ever hugged me.
Hey, you know what?
I never have been hugged.
Maybe this is just what I needed.
Or maybe I'm just a jerk
who enjoys bullying other animals.
Oh, well, in that case,
I could just squeeze you till you pop like a grape.
No, no. Go with the hug.
The hug's good.
Actually, I'm liking the hug.
[groans]
How you feeling, Kowalski?
[coughs]
I could taste sound.
But that's passed.
Rico?
[confused moan]
Well, the best thing for it is to get back on our feet.
King me!
Hey, guys.
Anybody else seeing a robot penguin
playing checkers with a poisonous frog?
Uh-huh.
More rack time, boys.
[brassy detective music]