[bell tolls]
[brassy detective music]
- Hit it. - ♪ Hey-oh, yah, hah ♪
- ♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪ - Yeah.
- ♪ Hey-oh ♪ - ♪ Yeah, oh-hey-oh ♪
[brassy detective music]
[camera shutter clicks]
Cute and cuddly, boys.
[jazzy detective music]
Ahh, hobby day.
It's like taking a regular day
and making it a Saturday.
But it is Saturday, Skipper.
Hmm, it's working already.
Oui.
Ahh! Oof!
- Oh. - Help me, please!
Whoa!
This better be life or death, ringtail,
or we can arrange those stakes.
It's much worse!
My groove!
It is gone!
Your... huh? What?
My groove. My boogie.
My festive fandangoiness.
Are you talking about dancing?
Are you daft?
Hear my words and see my booty.
So you think you can't dance.
Oh, cruel fate.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
Mostly because it was yesterday.
All right, Maurice, hit it!
♪ Hey-oh, yah, hah ♪
♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪
[laughing]
Are my peoples loving it?
Um... not really.
♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪
[yawning loudly]
[upbeat honky-tonk music]
[gasps]
Look at them, Maurice!
The baboons have stolen my peoples!
That Darla is bewitching them with her shaking booty.
Hmm, I know I'm bewitched.
Yes, she is quite good.
But that is no excuse!
So I decided to have a little talk with Darla
and explain my feelings.
Ahhh! I've been skunk-bombed!
Whoa, that does stink.
Ah, much better.
Having settled the matter fairly,
I went back to giving the peoples their entertainment.
Look at them, Maurice.
Now it is my quaking booty that is doing the bewitching.
I know I'm bewitched.
But those baboons:
they would not listen to sabotage--I mean, reason.
Ahh!
Did you drop that fuzzy bag o' stank into our habitat?
That is a wild accusation!
So y'all saying you didn't do it?
Oh, no, I did it.
I just think the accusation is wiiiild!
Mm-hmm, now I'm gonna say this slow,
'cause I can tell y'all got a bad case of the stupids...
Ah! Maurice!
How did she see the royal medical report?
Y'all are gonna apologize,
or my gals and I are gonna make us a set of lemur coats!
Ohhhh, can I have one?
Uh... [whispering indistinctly]
I cancel my order.
Well, I demand an apology
for your demanding of an apology!
So there, Miss Steals-all-my-peoples!
Now, look, Darla, we can work this out.
Forget it, hon. Not gonna happen.
Girls, bring me the jar!
♪ You won't dance when I put your groove in this jar ♪
♪ No, you won't prance ♪
♪ When I put your groove in this jar ♪
♪ Stand right where you are ♪
♪ While I put your groove in this jar ♪
♪ Yes, it's true, my friend ♪
♪ You're never gonna dance again ♪
♪ Since I put your groove in this jar ♪
- Hee-haw! - Okay,
aside from some terribly substandard singing,
what just happened?
Backwoods magic, that's what.
I put all your "groove" into this jar.
Ha! There is no such thing as "backwoods magic."
The sky spirits told me that.
Oh?
Then let's see you dance.
Prepare yourself for the amazement.
[bones cracking]
[inhales deeply]
Maurice? Give me a beat.
[bonk, bonk]
[making rhythmic farting and squeaking sounds]
Look out now--whoa!
[both gasp]
So? Y'all believe in my magic now?
N-n-n-n-no.
Nooooooooooooo!
So now you are understanding why I am needing your help?
Help me, penguins!
Help me so that my groove may fill my booty once more!
Ah, this is clearly psychosomatic.
You believe your dance skills have been stolen;
therefore you can't shake it.
Right.
It's all in your little head, ringtail.
No, no, no, the groove is not to be in my head.
It is to be in my booty.
But it's not there either. Look.
[glass shatters]
[snaps]
Uh, I got your boat out for you.
Um...
got any ideas for this?
Look, Darla, can you just give ringtail his groove back?
Well, sure I can, darling.
Yes, thank you. Thank you!
Soon as he apologizes
for skunk-blasting me and my gals!
Oh, I won't do that.
Apologizing is for the weak and wrong,
which is why you should do it to me,
because you are weak and wrong.
And you dance badly.
Okay, you may resume negotiating.
Fine.
Plan "B" it is.
Gentlemen, our objective: the groove jar.
Operation Runaway Jar will begin at 0700 hours sharp.
Phase one: The art of illusion.
[giggles] Whoa.
Phase two begins
when we insert Rico into the hot zone.
With his stunning disguise as cover,
he'll embed himself in Baboon Society.
He'll live among them for weeks,
months...
years!
Then, once he's gained their complete trust,
he'll give the signal.
At that point, we commence phase three:
Aerial onslaught.
That's when the fun begins.
We'll rain flaming righteousness down on those baboons.
Yes, there'll be collateral damage!
Um, excuse me.
Wouldn't it be easier to just sneak into their habitat
and take the jar...
like I just did?
Well, yeah, sure.
That--that could work too.
My groove! Oh, thank you.
[splurchs]
Thank you-- oop!
[all gasping]
Darla, you have saved my groove!
Oh, wait.
You're not giving it back, are you?
Well, that depends.
You ready to say you're sorry?
Depends.
Are you saying you're sorry, eh?
Then I guess that's a big ol' no.
Think you've got all the angles covered,
don't you, baboon?
But you didn't count on this monkey wrench.
Ahhhh!
Owwwww!
Run, Maurice!
I'm flying! I'm fly--aaaah!
I got it!
Rico, catch!
[boink]
[rhino growls]
Yahhh!
Ah! Ah! Ah!
Huh? all: Ahhhh!
Noooooooo!
[glass shattering]
My... my groove.
Kiss it good-bye, honey.
You ain't never dancing again!
N-n-n-no.
Buck up, ringtail.
I'm sure Kowalski can whip you up some new... groove?
[dance music]
What the deuce?
[hiphop music]
That ain't right.
Kowalski, analysis.
Skipper, you seem to be shaking your booty.
[feet squeaking]
Quite impressively, I might add.
Uh-huh.
But I'm not doing this.
Something's making me dance.
You--you have my groove!
It is not all bye-byed after all!
Yay!
Get it out of me!
I don't know how.
Guess who does.
Is it Santa?
Ye--what? No!
I'm the only one who can fix this.
But am I gonna?
Santa would.
- Well, I ain't Santa! - Hey!
What if Julien apologized?
That's all I'm asking, hon.
Have I not made my policy on apologizing clear?
It is for the weak and wrong!
Listen, ringtail, I'm about to show you
just how weak and wrong you are!
- Apologize now! - Uh-uh.
Okay, then.
Let's dance.
Huh? Ahhh!
[jazz music]
I can't look away from the raw, savage splendor.
[disco music]
I want to cry,
but I don't know if it's because
I've never seen anything so beautiful...
or something so horrific.
Ahh! Ahh! I have never--
Wow. Just... wow.
[giggling] Penguin's funny!
[frenetic classical music]
Okay, okay, no more.
Mercy!
I, you know, apologize to you.
Groove, move.
What? That's it?
No song?
[hiphop music]
Is it... I think...
♪ Yeah, dance ♪
I think...
Yes, it is!
Ha-ha! My grooviness is back!
Ahh, thank you, thank you!
Mort, Maurice, come!
We have to play catch up on the lost booty shakes!
♪ Hey-oh ♪
I don't get it.
What in the world made me shake my tail feathers like that?
Maybe Darla's magic was real.
Don't be ridiculous, Private.
Cold, hard science negates even the possibility of magic.
Okay, then maybe Skipper has a dancer buried deep inside him.
Magic's real. Case closed.
But science--
Nope, I said case closed.
[upbeat music]
[laughing]
Come on, challenge me!
Give your king a real race to the bouncy!
[both giggling]
Hey, that's too real.
Give me much slower racing now.
- Whoa, look, I'm running. - Yay, yay.
[laughing]
Whoa! Ooh!
Your Majesty!
[shuddering]
Something dangerous and painful
has happened to the royal bouncy.
Mort, you jump too so we make sure.
Wheee--oww!
Okay, now Maurice, but headfirst this time.
[groans]
Total inflation pump failure on the lemurs' bouncy, Skipper.
Polar bear cooling fan, kangaroo auto-feeder,
chimp reading lamp, all down!
Looks like we've got some bad habitats, boys.
[all talking at once]
Attention, panicky mob.
Clearly, this is phase one in the space squid invasion.
I'd advise you all to keep your heads.
Space squids always start with the heads.
[whimpers]
Space squids?
Guys, I think we're just having a blackout.
Well, that's just what the squids
would want us to think, Marlene...
if you truly are Marlene.
You know, I believe she's right.
The entire city is suspiciously dark.
Well, I guess that's
a perfectly logical explanation for--
hyah! Show... your... tentacles...
- you... squid... spy! - Hey! All right. Let me go!
- What are you do--oof! - Her story checks out.
A blackout? We're gonna run out of food! Oh!
And I'm concerned about the rise in crime rates.
Yeah, I hear dat's a real problem.
Not to worry.
Penguins always have a plan.
My generator can supply emergency power,
and with the food rationing program we've set up--
Stop! This is no time for planning and reasonableness!
With no electrickly power,
the zoo has now become...
a jungle!
And who is the king of the jungle?
Okay, I'll give you a hint.
He is also the king of the zoo and the outlying mid-town area.
And it is me.
Okay, no more hints.
[all murmuring]
Negative.
There is no such thing as Jungle Law.
Oh, really?
Perhaps everyone would like to hear the opinionings
of a certified Jungle Lawyer.
[clears throat]
All hail King Julien.
Case closed.
Case open! Ha-ha--oof!
You can't seriously be falling for this!
Well, he's got a briefcase.
[all exclaiming]
This is going to end very badly, "Your Majesty."
And when this Jungle Law does fail,
I will have four sweet, sweet words for you.
Oh, "I love King Julien"?
Ye--no.
- I. Told. You. So. - What?
Nobody tells the king "I told you so."
It is unspoken of.
Well, we'll just see about that, hmm?
Yes, we will.
And right now, I will be seeing you penguins
giving your king the royal sponge bath.
[chuckles] Ooh.
Ew. I call topsies.
Private, we're not part of this kook-ball's kingdom.
Come on, boys!
Here you go. Knock yourself out.
[squeals eagerly]
And now begins the gloriousness
of the goldenish age of the new dawn
of the mighty reign of Jungle Law!
Oop, hang on.
I forgot to lock the security hatch.
What in the name of Eisenhower's oatmeal?
[explosions rumbling]
[sirens wailing]
[crackling]
[both growling]
What happened to all the peanuts?
Oh-kay.
That was fast.
[animals yelling]
Hand over your food, ya mooks!
Wha--
Are you gorillas gonna give everything back nicely,
or does this get ugly?
You have feet?
Give Mort feet.
Mort need feet!
[ululating]
You stole Sad Eyes too?
Ehh, you never know when you'll need one.
all: Oof!
[both growl]
Oh, guys, guys.
Thank goodness you're back.
It's a madhouse up here!
What happened to King Julien?
He must've cracked like an Easter egg.
I knew it.
All right, men, "Jungle Law" has stunk up
our zoo long enough.
Time to apply some penguin-scented disinfectant
- to this mess. - Mess?
[laughs nervously]
Don't be so wrong, silly penguin.
Clearly the screaming and rampaging is to celebrate
three successful minutes of Jungle Law.
Hooray!
Also, I am resting, not hiding.
Well, well, well, King Ringtail.
I believe I owe you a few words.
In random order, they are: "told, I, so, you."
Allow me to unscramble.
Ah-ah-ah, shushies!
This is not "I told you so."
The royal me is still on top of all these things. Ah!
Ringtail, no! They'll rip you apart!
[animals screaming chaotically]
Yes, yes, everybody likes the chaos and the mayhem,
but we need orderly chaos and nice mayhem.
You stink, Julien!
Okay, we talked about this, pinky.
We express our feelings with words,
not the violent throwing of--
hyurk!
Yo, bada!
What kind of ransom you get for a king these days?
[laughs nervously] Whoa!
Playtime's over, primates.
[all grunting]
Whoa!
If I don't get some food right now--
Ahh, oof!
Oh, peanut head!
Kowalski, analysis!
King Julien requires immediate rescue.
But to stop the zoo-wide panic,
we need to get the criminal element under control too.
[ululating]
Also, somebody should probably take care of that.
We've got three problems:
ringtail, Sad Eyes, and criminal gorillas.
I want teams of two on each.
No man enters the danger zone solo.
Uh, Skipper...
that would leave us two men shy of--
Eh-la-la-la! Never tell me the math!
If we need two recruits, we'll find two recruits!
Wait. What's, uh--
[screaming]
[giggling psychotically]
both: Huh?
[grunts]
[bonk, bonk]
Okay, that was, uh, kinda fun.
Get 'em!
Whoo-hoo!
[grunting defensively]
It's okay, Mort.
We're not going to hurt you.
Not true, Private.
I did authorize lethal force.
Yaaaaaa!
both: Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ow!
Peanut head!
We're only here to talk, friend.
Straight turkey, no judgments.
Are you crazy?
The dude's head doesn't even look like a peanut!
What?
How dare you insult
my gloriously peanut-shaped head!
Aaaahhh--mmmmf!
- Oh, golly. - That ain't right.
Bye-bye.
Whoa!
Yah!
Okay, come on, let's return the loot.
both: Ow! Ah! Ow!
Ahh!
Time to change tactics.
Tiny lemur!
The feet need you!
The feet?
[King Julien shouting in pain]
Why... won't... you...
go... down, peanut?
Yeaaaaaah!
Peanuts!
Whew! I have seen my entire life
and many gigantic nose nuggets flashing before my eyes.
Thank the sky spirits that is over.
Feeeet!
There he is!
You were supposed to protect us!
Hey, oh, I coulda really hurt somebodies.
Jungle Law is for fools, baby!
Yes, yes, everything turned out
most wonderfully in the end.
You may now decide among yourselves
how to praise me.
I demand to talk to my Jungle Lawyer!
Dude with a briefcase? Haven't seen him.
Guys, we have to do something.
We can't just let this happen.
I don't know.
I am dying to see that catapult in action.
Looks like this is my last chance
to say what needs to be said.
So long, sucker.
A moment, please!
I've got a few words for you, ringtail.
Oh, no, not now.
He couldn't.
I... told... you...
that this plan was genius!
all: Huh?
- Say what? - Well, his jungle majesty
knew that in a crisis,
the biggest danger is mass panic.
So he sets up
this postapocalyptic wasteland scenario
to keep everyone's mind off the blackout.
Brilliant.
All right.
[animals murmuring in agreement]
[electricity buzzing]
- Boy, that's great. - All right.
Skipper, you gave up an "I told you so."
That's the most noble thing I've ever seen.
Sometimes, Private,
you've just got to set your sights a little higher.
Yes, praise me!
For I am so much greater than any penguin could ever be!
Rico, set the sights a little higher.
- Uh-huh. - [splat]
Ahh! I have been meloned!
All hail the King.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm!
[brassy detective music]